


The Baby Monitor

by multifandomfics



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Kid Fic, M/M, Pacifier AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-18
Updated: 2019-03-03
Packaged: 2019-10-31 10:16:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 88,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17847539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/multifandomfics/pseuds/multifandomfics
Summary: Following the murder of weapon’s developer, Tony Stark, Bucky Barnes has to go from special ops to his hardest assignment yet… protecting the family of the man that he’d failed to protect.  Barnes has to learn how to juggle keeping this grieving family safe from the same threats that were responsible for his presence in the first place.  However, the most challenging part of the assignment is not keeping the family safe, but keeping his own emotions in check, as he gets more and more involved with the family, in particular Stark’s handsome widower Steve. The Pacifier AU.  My contribution for the Stucky AU Big Bang 2019. *Not Explicit until later chapters*





	1. Prologue

            Sergeant Barnes stared at the file for a long moment.  He must have been reading this wrong. He was a special operations agent.  This was too much for even him to touch with a ten-foot pole. Unfortunately it had come down directly from the secretary.  He didn’t exactly have an option. However, going AWOL was looking more and more appealing by the second.

            “Go ahead,” Secretary Pierce said with an amused smile.  “Speak freely. Your face is practically saying it all as it is.”

            He cleared his throat.  “Apologies, sir--”

            “Speak.  Freely,” Pierce reiterated with an amused expression on his face.

            “Don’t you think that this may be a conflict of interest?  I was there when Stark…” His voice trailed off.

            Pierce frowned.  “That’s why this is such a good fit.  You need some time, a little R&R, and you refuse to take any time off.”

            He wasn’t convinced, but he wouldn’t dare disagree with the secretary.  “I don’t mean any disrespect, sir--”

            Pierce waved dismissively.  “I thought I told you to speak freely.”

            He shook his head.  “If you want me on this, then that’s all that matters.  I’ll do my best to ensure the safety of the assets.”

            Pierce grinned and it was unsettling.  There was something… off about it. “That’s the spirit.  This assignment will be a cakewalk. You just need to go in, find JARVIS, and get out.  Stark was working on this technology for the better part of a decade. He died to make sure that our enemies didn’t get their hands on it.  We need to find it and bring it someplace safe. Otherwise, we’re all in danger.”

            Barnes grimaced.  Stark’s death had only been a week ago, and he wasn’t sure if this was an appropriate call.“But the family…”

            “Will be briefed on the reason for your presence there,” Pierce insisted.  “Believe me, you’ll have their full cooperation on this. They want all this done with more than we do.”

            “I don’t doubt that, sir,” he said honestly.  “I’m just not sure if I’m the best choice for this--”

            “I’m gonna level with you, Barnes.  You’re my number one pick for this one.  You spent some time with Stark and I think that you’ll have a lot to offer on this case.  I need you on this. It’s not exactly up for debate.”

            Barnes nodded.  The message was clear.  This was an order, not a request.  “Of course, sir. If that’s what you think is the best course of action here.”

            Pierce gave a firm nod.  It wasn’t up for discussion.  “You’re dismissed. Your new assignment begins tomorrow.”

 

 


	2. Chapter 1

            Barnes was ready to report for his new assignment.  He stood outside the large, grand home. It had to have at least three floors.  It was the first time that he had ever been intimidated by a place and he had spent the last fifteen to twenty years in active war zones.  Terrorists he could handle, but domesticity--that was entirely more frightening.

            He took a deep breath.  It was time to rip off the bandage.  He raised his hand and pressed the doorbell.  Almost instantly, Barnes could hear commotion coming from inside the home.  He was about to force his way inside to investigate when the door slowly creaked open.

            Barnes relaxed when he realized that he was standing across from a teenager.  This must have been one of the children. Bucky stood up straight and extended his hand.  “I’m Sergeant Barnes, is your father available?”

            The boy opened the door wider, and Bucky felt his heart pang.  The Stark resemblance was uncanny. He knew one thing for certain, he was in the right place.

            The kid shook his head and nodded.  “Yeah, Pops is just changing the baby.  He’ll be down in a minute.”

            Bucky smiled tightly and put his hand down as he followed the boy into the home.  It seemed to be almost larger than the exterior. There were halls that seemed to be never ending and the large staircase seemed to reach up to the heavens themselves.  He knew Stark was wealthy, he just didn’t realize how wealthy.

            As he was taking it all in, the kitchen area erupted with noise. Bucky bolted over to investigate.  To his relief, it appeared to just be a fallen cereal bowl. However, what Bucky first noticed, before the spilled milk and cheerios, was the sea of children that were sitting in the room.  Bucky had read the file, he knew there were children present in the home, but he was currently staring at five of them.

            The older boy, who had let him inside walked over to the spilled bowl and began to clean up the mess.  By his side, was a younger girl, she also strongly resembled Stark. However, she couldn’t have been older than ten.

            “I’m sorry, Howie.  I’m so clumsy.” She was sniffling and her eyes were all puffy.  This couldn’t have just be over spilled cereal.

            The older boy--Howie, took a long deep breath.  “It’s okay. All taken care of. Why don’t you go brush your teeth?”

            The girl nodded and hurried off up the steps.

            “Can I be excused too?” Two of the others asked in unison.

            Howie shrugged.  “If you’re full--” before he could finish the sentence, the two elementary aged children stood up and tossed their bowls in the sink.

            “You better be ready on time or you’ll be stuck on the bus,” he called after them as they scurried off.

            Howie shook his head as he looked over in Bucky’s direction.  He seemed to jump a bit. “Sorry, I didn’t see you there.”

            “I heard the noise, and I wanted to make sure everything was all right.  I hope I didn’t intrude,” Bucky said.

            He shrugged.  “If you’re going to stick around, then you’ll have to get used to the noise.  It’s only quiet here when it’s empty.”

            As if on cue, a door slammed upstairs and it was followed by high-pitched bickering.  “I’m starting to see that.” It would be a nightmare to navigate from a security standpoint.  He was going to have to find ways to differentiate from threats and children.

            The last child who couldn’t even be five years old yawned as he scooted off the stool.  “All done, Howie.”

            Howie walked over to where the little one had left his bowl and investigated.  He gave a suspicious look before breaking into a smile. It didn’t quite reach his eyes.  “Good job, kiddo. Go upstairs and brush your teeth. I’ll be up in a few minutes to help you get dressed.”

            The little blonde boy practically jumped for joy as he bolted out of the kitchen.  Howie picked up the bowl and placed it in the sink with the others.

            “If you’ll excuse me, I have to round up the troops.” Howie politely excused himself as he left the kitchen.

            Thus far, Bucky had no idea what to think.  He’d been in the home for a least twenty minutes and had yet to meet the infamous Captain Steve Rogers.  It didn’t exactly bode well. Pierce had made it clear that this assignment could go on for an extended period of time, and it didn’t seem as though Rogers had any interest in meeting him.  It wasn’t as though Bucky blamed him. He was sure that Rogers knew of his connection to Stark--he did have military connections after all. Bucky wasn’t sure why Pierce had insisted on this in the first place.

             After a few more minutes of waiting around and listening to the commotion echoing around the home, a tall, blonde, perfectly sculpted man descended the steps.  The rumors were true--Stark and family really were perfect. He wouldn’t had believed it if he hadn’t seen if with his own eyes. The house and kids were one thing, but Stark’s trophy husband had to be the most appealing part of the package.

             “Sergeant Barnes.”  Rogers held out his hand and shook Bucky’s firmly.  “Sorry to keep you waiting. The baby’s coming down with something, and I was just on the phone with the pediatrician.”

            “It’s not a problem,” Bucky said.  “I wasn’t waiting long… Captain--”

            Rogers waved distractedly.  “I haven’t seen active duty in the better part of a decade.  Steve is fine.”

            “Let me begin by offering my condolences.  I can’t imagine what a difficult time you and your family must be going through,” he said.

            Rogers--Steve looked wounded at the mention of his late husband.  It was as though Bucky had just slapped him across the face. It was only for a moment but it was clear, Stark would likely not be an active topic of conversation.

            “Thank you.  It still doesn’t feel real,” Steve said quietly.  “I just keep expecting him to walk through the door with an outlandish story of how he faked it.”

            “I’m sorry,” Bucky said.  “I wish there was more--”

            “No, no.  Tony knew the risks.  Even though I begged him to send someone in his place, he was insistent that he had to see the JARVIS project through.  He was always so stubborn.” Steve crossed his arms and looked down, avoiding Bucky’s eyes.

            “I was hoping we could discuss your decision to… _decline_ a safe house until we find the people responsible and can be sure you and your family are safe--”

            Steve sighed agitatedly.  He was shaking his head adamantly as he began to pace around the sitting area.  “Sergeant Barnes, I appreciate where this is coming from, but I’ve already told Pierce how I feel about that.  I refuse to run away from our home because someone is looking for Tony’s work. All his work was done in his workshop.  He never brought that home after we had kids. Home was family time. Besides, my kids just lost their father. Their whole world has been thrown upside down.  The last thing they need is to have to leave their home, change their names, and start over in a new school. There hasn’t been any indication that anyone is even looking here.  The answer is no, Sergeant.”

            “I didn’t mean to overstep,” Bucky said honestly.  “I was just speaking from a safety standpoint. These guys are sly.  We don’t even know exactly what we’re up against here. I just wanted to be certain.”

            Steve nodded a he pinched the bridge of his nose.  “I’m certain, Sergeant.”

            “Understood,” Bucky said awkwardly.  He wasn’t sure what to think of it. His job would have been exponentially easier if he could take the family to a safe location.  Unfortunately, it wasn’t as though he could just force them to leave.

            “I assume you’ve met the kids,” Steve said as they heard a crash from the upstairs, followed by laughter.

            “Not officially.  How many children are in the home?  I want to get started on an advanced security plan.”  Bucky distractedly listened to the din, trying to ensure that this was just kids messing around, rather than an attack.

            “In the house, six.  Overall, seven. Our oldest is away at school.  She didn’t stick around long following the funeral, she had exams.  Besides, I think it was hard for her to be here without Tony. They were always very close.”  Steve put his hands on his ridiculously small waist and shook his head. “I would have liked her to stay a bit longer.  The school was very understanding, but she didn’t want to stay.”

            Bucky blinked.  He had merely been asking so that he could make a well informed security plan.  He wasn’t accustomed to family dynamics. “So six in the home. One out of the home.  Can you give me her school information? I want to get one of my guys over there to keep an eye on her.”

            “Yeah.”  He pulled out his phone and began looking through it.  “Should I text it or…”

            Bucky held out his hand and Steve placed the phone gently into his palm.  Bucky entered his phone number and sent himself the information. “I’m in your phone as James.  If anyone gets a hold of your phone, it’ll be less suspicious. If you need anything and I’m not in the vicinity, feel free to call.  Do not text if you can avoid it. Do the kids have phones?”

            “My older three do.  The little ones don’t.  Tony and I weren’t going to be those parents who give six-year-olds smartphones. The only reason my ten-year-old has one is because of all her extracurriculars.  I need to be able to keep in contact,” he said.

            “I’m going to need them to have my number, as well.  Their locations will have to be shared with me, even the older one,” Bucky said more to himself than to Steve.

            “Is that really necessary for Sarah?” Steve asked.

            Bucky stared at him.  The only name that he had down was Howie.  “Sarah...”

            “My oldest,” Steve clarified.  “The one at school.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Yes. Honestly, I’d prefer it if she were home, but I see that’s not an option.  She needs her own security and I need access to her whereabouts.”

            “But she doesn’t know anything about JARVIS, none of us do!”  Steve snapped.

            “I know that you and you know that, but these people that we’re dealing with either don’t know or don’t care.  They may try and use her as leverage if they think _you_ know something,” Bucky stated calmly.  “I just want to make sure that we don’t lose anyone here.  My job is keep all of you safe.” He’d already failed one Stark, he wasn’t about to fail any others.

            Steve rubbed his forehead in frustration.  This was clearly stressing him out a bit. “I didn’t even think about that.”

            “It’s my job to think about that,” Bucky said quietly.  “I’m going to come up with a plan to keep you all safe, but I need you to understand that this is serious.  The government isn’t doing this without reason.”

            Steve opened his mouth to respond when the children all came racing down the steps.  

           The youngest once raced over to Steve and pulled him into a tight hug.  “Papa, are you driving us to school today?”

           Steve lifted him up, kissed his cheek and placed him back on the ground.  “Aunt Pepper is going to bring you today. The baby isn’t feeling well.”

            The little boy pouted.  “I wanted to show you my art!  Miss Peggy hanged it up for everybody to see!”

            “You know what?” Howie knelt down to his brother’s level.  “I will take a picture and you can show Pops yourself when you get home.  Okay?”

            He crossed his arms.  “Fine.”

            Steve silently mouthed “thank you,” to Howie.  In return, Howie just rolled his eyes.

           There was a car horn that beeped and the children went to move to the exit.  When Steve put his hand out. “Aunt Pepper can wait a minute.” He motioned to Bucky.  “This is Sergeant Barnes. He is going to be staying with us for a while.”

            “Why?” The elementary aged boy asked.

            Steve paused.  Bucky had little doubt that the older children knew why he was there.  The younger ones… that was more sensitive.

            “I’m here to help out your father since--”  Bucky began.

            “Since Daddy died.”  The younger boy answered for him.

            Tension filled the room instantly.  Bucky glanced around the room waiting for a reaction.  None came.

            “I just wanted to introduce myself,” Bucky said after a long pause.  “Like your father said, I’m Sergeant Barnes. I’ll be around for a while.  I look forward to getting to know you all.”

            “Howie,” the older one nodded at him as he began walking towards the door.

            The two elementary children beamed up at him.  “Hi! I’m Talia, this is A.J.” The little girl pointed to the little boy.  “We’re twins!”

            “Come on!” Howie called as the horn beeped again.  “We’re going to be late.” The two twins scurried off towards the door.

            The other daughter picked up the younger boy and walked past him.  She smiled tightly. “I’m Maria. This is Harrison.”

            The little boy--Harrison, waved excitedly at him.  “Do you want to look at my art?”

            “I’m sure I’ll see it soon,” Bucky said, unsure what else to say.

            Maria grabbed her messenger bag with her free arm and followed her siblings out the door.

            Bucky turned to face Steve.  “That was five. The baby is--”

            “Jamie is upstairs,” Steve answered sadly.  “His sleep has been all over the place.”

            “How old?”

            “Jamie?  He’s a little over a year.  Tony--he’s not even going to get a chance to know him,” Steve said as he looked down, and Bucky could swear he saw single tear escaped his eye.  Domestic life was so goddamn complicated.

            Bucky pretended not to notice.  “The other children, how old are they?”

            Steve sniffled and cleared his throat.  “Sarah is 19, Howie--16, Maria is 10. The twins are 6 and Harrison is 4.”

           “Quite a range,” Bucky said as he began typing it all into his phone.

            Steve shrugged.  “When Howie was little, I was shipped out again for a few years.  I got injured. Wanted to have a bigger family… here we are.”

           “Howie seems to have really stepped up.  He was helping a lot this morning with his siblings,” Bucky noted.

            Steve nodded.  “Yeah, I wish he’d take it easy.  He’s still just a kid and he’s going through it all alone.  He won’t talk about it.”

            It was clear that Steve _did_ want to talk about it, but Bucky hardly even knew Tony.  He’d just been assigned to protect him earlier the same week that he passed away, and he definitely wasn’t qualified to have this conversation with his widower.

            “Can you go through the routines with me?  I need to know your schedule as well as the kids’,” Bucky changed the subject.

            “I’ve been home with Jamie pretty much the entire past year.  I try and take him with me jogging and on walks. We haven’t gotten to do that in a while.  The other kids are at school Monday through Friday. Howie has drivers ed on Wednesday. Maria stays after school almost everyday, she’s as part of almost every club possible.  The twins stay after school on Fridays for Brownies and Boy Scouts. Harrison has soccer practice every Tuesday and a game every Saturday. They’re four, though, so it’s really just a bunch of kids running after the ball and just kicking aimlessly.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Sarah?”

            Steve shrugged.  “I don’t know. This is her second year away.  She hardly tells me what’s going on with her.”

            “I’ll reach out to my team, we’ll get tabs on her soon,” Bucky said trying to reassure him.

            Steve frowned.  “I just wish it didn’t have to come to that.  I wish they could just keep their lives as normal as possible.”

            Bucky crossed his arms this time.  “I know, but we want to make sure that they _have_ lives, Captain--Steve.”

            Steve frowned at that.  “We don’t know anything, Sergeant--”

            “I believe you,” Bucky said honestly.  He’d met Stark. Stark was not the kind of man that would put his family in danger.  “That doesn’t mean that our enemies are seeing things the same way that we are.”

            Steve shook his head as the baby began to cry.  “Here, let me show you to your room. I’ve got to take the baby to the doctor soon.”

            Bucky followed Steve up the large steps.  He was right. There were three floors to this place.  Steve led him off at the second floor and he walked into the room that had to be the nursery.  He picked the baby up and sniffed.

            “No dirty diaper,” Steve said as he began to soothe the baby by bouncing him up and down.  The baby was beautiful. He had bright blue eyes and fair hair. He looked just like Steve.  The baby clung to his father as he eyed Bucky suspiciously.

            “Say hi to Sergeant Barnes,” Steve said sweetly to the little one.  He waved following Steve’s lead.

            He led them out of the nursery down the hall.  This must have been the residential wing of the home.  All the bedrooms seemed to be in a row. Steve led him into the corner room, which was enormous.  He could only imagine what the master looked like.

            “This is one of our guest rooms.  If you wanted a different one--”

            “This is fine,” Bucky said honestly.  He couldn’t imagine that there was a room more spectacular in the house.  

            Steve smiled sadly.  “We’ll leave you to get settled.  I’m probably going to head out with the baby in about twenty minutes or so.  I’m not sure if you were going to come or stay here and work on your security plan.  I’m not sure how this is supposed to work.”

            Bucky didn’t exactly have a clear idea either.  Most of his security work was standing guard outside of a safe house.  This was uncharted territory. “Would you like me to come? I’m not pressuring.  It’s just--if you keep your location setting on your phone and call me when you get there and when you’re heading out, I have no problem letting you go alone.  I’m security, not a babysitter.”

            Steve nodded.  “I’d like to take him alone.  It’s not personal, just--”

            “You don’t need a stranger being involved in your child’s medical history.  I don’t take it personally, Steve. This must be pretty bizarre,” Bucky said, trying to make it seem as though this was a totally normal situation that he had been in several times before.

            Steve gave him a grateful look. “Thank you.  This is all so… I keep expecting to wake up.”

            Bucky felt a surge of guilt.  He had missed something with Stark.  The enemy was able to get a key piece of information that led to them finding his whereabouts.  Bucky hadn’t even seen it coming. He couldn’t let this family down… not again.

 

 


	3. Chapter 2

            Bucky spent the first 48 hours in the home observing. His job was to make sure that the JARVIS tech wasn’t in the home, and to keep the family safe.  As far as he could tell, there was no sign of the tech anywhere. If the family knew anything, then they weren’t showing it. They all seemed to genuinely be mourning.  The only one who seemed off was the widower. He mostly kept to himself. He had a home filled with children and riches; yet Rogers spent most of his time up in the bedroom.  Even the baby seemed to have become Howie’s responsibility. The only time that Rogers seemed to be out and about was in the mornings and when the kids would first come back from school.  It was almost as if he were just keeping up appearances.

            Barnes had reached out to his associate, Barton, to help out with the older daughter.  According to Rogers, she and Stark were close. Maybe she had insight into the JARVIS technology, even if she didn’t realize it herself.  She might be able to offer them some new, fresh perspectives.

            According to Barton, Sarah had been coping normally, focusing on school but otherwise staying in.  Still, Bucky wasn’t convinced. He found it strange that she had left almost immediately after the funeral.  He must have been missing something.

            In his observations, he discovered certain… quirks about the residents of the home.  For one thing, he seemed to be the only one who was actually sleeping on the second floor.  Even the baby, Jamie, was only in the nursery for his naps during the day. He wasn’t sure where they all went off to at night.  He’d have to do more digging. The house was enormous, so maybe the second floor was their napping wing.

            He had to start exploring the grandiose home more overall.  There was a large possibility that the family just didn’t realize that the technology was in the home with them.  The house was so enormous, it would have been easy for Stark to hide it undetected.

The third day was when Barnes set his plan of security into action.  He made sure that he was the first one in the kitchen. Interestingly, the children all came down the steps at the same time.   _Peculiar_.  

            “Morning, Sarge,” Howie said with a yawn as he walked over to the refrigerator and took out the milk.  Cereal and milk seemed to be all these kids ate for breakfast. They appeared to be creatures of habit.

            “Good morning,” Bucky said politely.  “As most of you are aware, my job is to keep all of you safe during this difficult time.  Part of that means knowing where you are at all times.”

            “We already shared our locations from our phones with you,” Maria, the oldest girl in the home said as she crossed her arms.

            Bucky paused.  “I’m aware. I’m also aware that you know how to turn it off--”

            “We won’t--” Howie interjected.

            “Regardless, your safety is not a matter that I take lightly,” Bucky said firmly.  He pulled out the small silver tracking bands from his pocket. “These are your new wardrobe accessories.  They only come off when _I_ decide to take them off of you.  I know it may seem a bit extreme, but it’s for your own protection.”

            Maria threw her head back and groaned.  “For how long?”

            Bucky shrugged.  “Until we feel there is no longer an active threat.  It’s this or one of my team will be sitting in on all of your classes and extracurriculars.”

            Howie raised an eyebrow as he poured some cereal into the bowls for the three younger children.  “Listen,” he said as he placed the bowls in front of the twins and Harrison. “I have no problem with wearing that bracelet, but isn’t it a little over the top?  We know nothing about our dad’s work. If we did, we’d tell you. I hate the damn thing. It took him away from us. We just want to try and have as normal a life as possible-- you can have the damn JARVIS tech.”

            “I want to make sure that you have a life to live.  This is all for your protection,” Bucky said sternly.

            “I get that,” Howie said calmly.  “Like I said, you want me to wear a bracelet, I’ll wear it.  I just don’t understand. They already took our dad. What else could they want?”

            Bucky took a deep breath, this family needed a different kind of help than he was able to provide.  He wasn’t a therapist. “It’s not--they’re not… It’s more complicated than that. It wasn’t just about your father, but his work.  We just want to make sure that you all stay safe.”

            Howie rolled up his sleeve and presented his wrist.  “Fine. Put it on. Safety first.”

            Bucky fastened the band around Howie’s wrist tightly.  He typed in an access code and it lit up green before back to the metallic silver.

            “Does is hurt?” The youngest girl, the twin--Talia, asked nervously.

            Howie shook his head and smiled--it didn’t quite meet his eyes.  “Nope. I can’t feel a thing.”

            The other twin--the boy, didn’t look too convinced.  “Boys don’t wear bracelets.”

            Howie shrugged.  “Boys can wear whatever they want.  Besides, I think it’s pretty cool.”

            As if on command, AJ, the twin boy, hopped down and went right over to Bucky with his arm out.  It became clear that Howie could be the most valuable ally in the home.

            Bucky gently clasped the band on AJ’s wrist.  He let the lights flash to signal it was activated before moving on.

            “Who’s next?” Howie asked with a clap of his hands.

            Maria rolled her eyes as she gave Bucky her hand.  “I’ll wear it, but I’m not happy about it.”

            Bucky put her band on and didn’t respond.  Their happiness wasn’t his priority. Their safety was.

            After Maria was Talia.  The six year old was hesitant as she put her arm out.  Bucky made sure that he was being particularly gentle with her.  Her arm was shaking, the poor thing was so nervous.

            “See,” Buck said after the lights flashed.  “That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

            Talia shook her head, her dark hair dancing across her face.  “No.”

            Bucky then walked over to Harrison, who was blissfully unaware of what was going on.  “I’m going to put this on your wrist, okay?” Bucky asked.

            Harrison looked over to Howie, who nodded at him reassuringly.  Howie was already proving to be an instrumental piece of this operation.  The teen could have made this exceedingly difficult for him. He would have to make a point to get on the kid’s good side.

            The four year old put down his spoon and gave Bucky his hand.  Bucky attached the band to the boy and activated it. That was it.  The real trick would be getting one of those on the baby.

            Right on schedule, Rogers came down the steps with Jamie in tow.  He walked into the kitchen and put the baby in the high chair. “Good morning.  Did everyone sleep all right?”

            Maria scoffed as she pushed her raven hair out of her face.  “Did you know about this?” She waved her arm up in the air to showcase the tracker.

            Steve didn’t seem to notice what the issue was.  “New bracelet? It’s nice.”

            She shrieked in aggravation.  “It’s a tracker!”

            Steve stopped strapping the baby into the high chair and stared at Bucky.  “Sergeant. May I have a word in the study?”  
            “Fine,” Bucky said as he followed Steve out of the kitchen and down one of the neverending halls.  

            Steve led him into one of the many rooms that he had yet to explore.  This room screamed Rogers. There were medals and his uniform was hanging on the wall, framed.  There were also old pictures of him _in_ the uniform, and Bucky had to admit that Stark certainly had an eye for pretty things.  Steve was a sight to see now, but those pictures of him in uniform belonged in a goddamn art museum.  Stark was a lucky man.

            “Sergeant, were you planning on discussing this with me?: Steve asked as he crossed his arms.

            “No,” Bucky said honestly.  “I’m going to need you to wear one too.”

Steve laughed for a moment, then he met Bucky’s eyes and his demeanor became much more rigid.

            “You’re not serious.“I do not take the safety of you and your family lightly,” Bucky said seriously.

            “Neither do I,” Steve said through gritted teeth.  “But they are still _my_ family and if you plan to put tracking devices on them, then I have a right to hear about it!”

            “It wasn’t a secret,” Bucky said.  “Like I said, you need one too. They just woke up first.”

            Steve took a seat behind his desk and took a deep breath.  “From now on, any decisions regarding my children need to go through me.”

            Bucky sighed.  “Steve, with all due respect, ensuring your safety is more important to me than holding your hand.  I’m going to need you to trust me a bit here.”

            “Trust you?” Steve asked with a hint of disgust in his voice. “‘ _With all due respect_ ’ you are asking us to trust the same people who were supposed to protect my husband!  I don’t blame you, or the government, but I sure as hell don’t _trust_ you either!”

            Bucky frowned and took a paused.  “Steve, I can’t imagine what you and your family must be going through, but for what it’s worth, I am taking this assignment extremely seriously.  If you want someone else, be my guest. I will call Pierce with you. Be honest with yourself, though, do you think anyone else will take this assignment as seriously as I will?  Do you think that there is a long line of special ops soldiers waiting to babysit a widower and his army of children? I’ve got news for you, Steve, anyone else you bring in here is going to suggest a safe house, set up surveillance and treat it like a joke.  I know what you’ve lost. This is personal for me. That’s why I was selected.”

            Steve pinched the bridge of his nose and squinted.  “These are my kids--”

            “I understand that. I am taking serious measures to protect your kids.  I can’t delay these precautions to have you sign a permission slip.” Bucky crossed his arms.

            Steve nodded.  “Fine, but I want to be briefed once a week on precautions and updates that you’ve received while watching them.”

            Bucky took a deep breath.  “I will brief you, but you have to wear your tracking device and I need to put one on the baby’s ankle.”

            Steve’s face distorted as if he’d just eaten something sour.  “I’ll wear one. I don’t understand why Jamie--”

            “I’m taking this seriously, Steve.”  Bucky shot him a stern look.

            Steve rubbed his forehead absentmindedly.  “All right. I’ll help you put one on Jamie.”  He paused. “My oldest will she--”

            “My associate has already taken care of it.  She’s wearing one.”

            Steve took a deep breath.  “Sergeant, I’d like to apologize for my outburst.  I didn’t mean--”

            “It’s all right,” Bucky said.  “I wouldn’t be thrilled if our roles were reversed here.  I just need you to try and be a little trusting here.”

            Steve rubbed his forehead.  “I know. I’m trying. Tony--Tony always said I was too nervous with them.  I just don’t know how to protect them from a threat that I can’t een see.”

            “That’s _my_ job,” Bucky said as he took a seat across from Steve.  “Let me do my job, Steve. This way you can just focus on being their father.”

            Steve glanced at one of the pictures on his desk. Bucky couldn’t see what it was, but if he had to bet money on it, he would have guessed that he was looking at a picture of Stark.  One of many rumors surrounding the couple was that Rogers had been using Stark for his money. It really seemed like Rogers was taking this loss to heart. It wasn’t making Bucky feel any easier about protecting this family.

            “I’m sorry.  I just… I don’t know what to do.  I feel so helpless. I wish I could just make it stop.  My kids deserve a normal life.”

            “I hear you,” Bucky said.  “But they deserve a life first.  Once we neutralize this threat, you can work on the normal.”

            Steve gave a small laugh at that.  “All right. Fine. I’ll go along with all of this.”

            Bucky put his hand out and Steve begrudgingly placed his hand in Bucky’s.  Bucky placed the tracking band on Steve’s wrist and activated it. The little green lights flashed and Steve withdrew his hand to examine the device.

            “This is it?”

            Bucky nodded.  “After a few days, you won’t even notice it.”

            “There are no radiation risks or anything, right?” Steve asked as he continued to roll his wrist around.

            Bucky raised an eyebrow.  “No. Your husband was very health conscious.  He made sure that there were no health implications.”

            Steve’s face paled.  His free hand began to trace his band gently, as if it was something sacred.  “Tony designed this?” He asked, his voice was barely louder than a whisper.

            Bucky nodded.  “Yes. Most of our tech has at least a small bit of your husband’s input.”

            Steve didn’t seem to be listening anymore.  He was just admiring the thin silver tracker.  

            Bucky felt uneasy.  This was becoming more complicated than he had anticipated.  There was a genuine love that Steve had for Tony. Whatever Rogers might have been hiding, he wasn’t responsible for what happened to Stark.  That much he could tell.

            “It would be helpful if you could encourage the older kids to cooperate as well.  I just want to make this all as seamless as possible.” Bucky stood up from the chair.  That seemed to snap Steve out of whatever daydream he was in.

            “Huh?” He hummed.  “Yeah--yeah. Sure.  I’ll talk to Howie and Maria.”

            “Thank you,” Bucky said as he exited the study.

 

 


	4. Chapter 3

            The next few weeks passed uneventfully.  Bucky had been exploring the home and all he found were strange collectibles and old family relics, but no state-of-the-art technology.  The kids’ routines were becoming easier for Bucky to navigate. He would pop in and make sure that they were around trustworthy company.

            He was running multiple background checks on almost everyone that the family came in contact with.  So far, there was nothing to report. The family and their contacts seemed perfectly ordinary. There were a few of Rogers’s contacts that had military backgrounds, but it matched up.  Rogers was military, and most of his contacts served at or around the same time as him. None of them seemed to be much of a threat.

            Sam Wilson was the veteran that came around the home most often.  He was one of many friends that would take the kids to and from school.  If Wilson wasn’t married, Bucky would have suspected that he was sweet on Rogers.  Wilson and Rogers were close. There was no question about that. However, Wilson doted on his husband’s every need, and Rogers was definitely too hung up on Stark to be having an affair.  Besides, even if Rogers was screwing around with Wilson, there was no indication that Wilson knew anything about JARVIS or any foreign powers that might want to get their hands on the tech.  Bucky was there, whoever killed Stark had resources and connections, he wasn’t killed over a lover’s quarrel.

            Another possibility was Pepper Potts.  She had been running Stark’s company while he was focusing on the JARVIS project.  It was possible that she knew something about the tech, but he still wasn’t convinced she had anything to do with Stark’s death..  Again, there was no connection to any kind of foreign power or terrorist organizations. In fact, Potts’s record was squeaky clean.  

            Bucky just couldn’t shake the feeling that he was missing something.  The family was almost too picture-perfect. Not one of them had a questionable connection.  Bucky was almost certain that if he were the one being looked into, that there would be a handful of people in his life that would raise some red flags.  It either meant that Rogers was purposely keeping people away, or that his friends were very good at hiding things. It might have been a combination of both.

            In the meantime, Bucky had been in almost constant communication with his associate, Barton.  Bucky still wasn’t convinced that the older daughter didn’t have anything to offer into the investigation.  However, she was away at school across the country. Bucky couldn’t justify leaving the others to get face-time with Sarah.

            He was currently reviewing Barton’s detailed report of the previous week.  He was sitting at the desk in his bedroom. His tablet was open to Barton’s report as he was reading through it.  The laptop was open to the security monitoring system that he’d put in place. He had placed cameras all over the home, which had been a fight on its own.  He was only allowed to have cameras on the entrances and exits of the bedrooms.

            Bucky had initially set up the cameras so he could see all over the bedrooms, but Steve pitched a fit about privacy.  Bucky still felt that protection and safety took priority, but Steve was adamant, so the compromise was made.

            There was a knock on his bedroom door.  Bucky glanced at the feed on his laptop.  He saw Howie standing in the hall just outside of Bucky’s bedroom.  This was new. None of them had come to see him before.

            Bucky got up from the desk and opened the door.  “Everything okay?”

            Howie rubbed his forehead nervously.  Maybe he had some new information for him.  “I’m sorry, Sergeant. It’s just--Aunt Pepper got stuck at the airport and… she can’t drive us to school.  Pa--Pops won’t get out of bed and… can you please drive us to school?”

            Bucky’s brow furrowed.  This had not been what he was expecting.  “I’ll take care of it. Have the kids dressed and downstairs in fifteen minutes.”

            Relief washed over Howie’s face.  “Thank you! Thank you, Sarge!”  
            Bucky watched as Howie raced down the steps.  Bucky left the bedroom and began to walk up the stairs to the third floor.  He’d only been up there when he was installing the security system. He walked down the hall and over to the master bedroom.  He paused for a moment, before he walked inside.

            The room was a mess, which wasn’t that surprising.  One of the first things that Bucky had learned was that the entire family had currently taken up residence in the master bedroom.  The three elementary-aged children would cuddle up with their father at night, while the older two slept on blow-up beds. There was even a spare crib in there for the baby.  Presently, Steve and the baby were the only ones in the room except for Bucky.

            The baby was in the crib, standing up.  He was looking at Steve. Steve, on the other hand, was still in bed.  He was laying on his stomach, his pillow over his head. It was clear that he had no intention of getting up anytime soon.

            “Steve,” Bucky said as he pulled the covers off the other man.  “You’ve gotta drive the kids to school. Pepper can’t make it this morning.”

            Steve just groaned and curled his legs into himself.

            Bucky blinked.  He hadn’t been expecting this.  “Steve, the kids need to go to school.”

            “They can take the bus,” Steve moaned.  Except they couldn’t. The buses had already came and went while the kids were eating breakfast.

            “They missed it,” Bucky said calmly.  “Get up. They’ll be ready for you when you get downstairs.”

            Steve shook his head.  “They can stay home.”

            Bucky raised an eyebrow.  “I disagree.”

            “It’s fine,” he said, barely audible.

            “If this is going to work, the kids need to keep a regular schedule,” Bucky said, trying to sound patient.

            Steve rolled over, his usually styled blonde hair was falling in his face.  “One day won’t hurt.”

            “Steve--”

            “I’m not going anywhere, Barnes,” Steve said, his voice cracking.

            Bucky frowned as he walked over to the crib.  He made a decision. School was important, and the kids were relatively safe there.  Safer than having them all in the same place like a bunch of sitting ducks. Definitely safer than having them around Steve in this state.  He took a deep breath and he picked Jamie up from the crib.

            “What are you doing?” Steve mumbled, his eyes opened a crack.

            Bucky shot him a look.  “Taking your kids to school.”

            “The baby--”

            “Needs adult supervision,” Bucky cut him off.  “Which you are clearly unable to provide at the moment.”

            Steve didn’t even argue with him, he just rolled over so that his back was to Bucky.  Bucky stared at the other man for a moment before he walked out of the bedroom with the baby on his hip.

            Bucky walked down the steps and was relieved to see that the five children were already waiting for him when he got to the base of the steps.  At least he didn’t have to worry about getting them ready. It made his life just a little bit easier.

            “Do you know where the keys are?” Bucky asked.  His car would only take five, including himself.  He knew for a fact that Steve had an SUV.

            Howie nodded as he waved the keys in his hand and tossed them to Bucky.  “I’m way ahead of you.”

            Bucky followed the children into the garage.  Howie and Maria were a blessing. They helped strap the twins, Harrison, and Jamie into their carseats.  Bucky had no idea how to even begin to work one of those.

            Howie made himself comfortable in the passenger seat, as Bucky started the car.  “I can tell you where to go.”

            “Thanks,” Bucky said under his breath.

            “The twins and Harrison are in the same building, so that’s easy enough,” Howie said as he wiped his head with his sleeve.  This was all clearly getting to him. Bucky tried not to judge, but these kids were going through enough, the last thing Howie needed was to be responsible for his siblings too.

            “We’ll figure it out,” Bucky said calmly.

            Howie nodded.  “Turn right at the light.”

            Bucky followed Howie’s instructions and got to the elementary school within ten minutes.  Howie and Maria sprung into action again, undoing the car seats and helping their siblings out of the car.

            Bucky picked up Jamie as he followed the children inside the school.  The twins skipped off towards their classrooms, while Harrison was clinging to Howie as they walked down the hall.

            “The Pre-K program is a little different.  Since they’re so young, we have to walk him down there so his teacher can sign him in,” Howie said as he swung the hand that Harrison was clutching back and forth.

            They stopped outside of a classroom and waited a few minutes.  A woman with caramel curls walked into the hall from the room. “Good morning, Harrison,” she said.  Her English accent caught Bucky’s attention. He knew that she was Harrison’s teacher, but maybe her background check was worth re-running.

            “Morning, Miss Peggy,” he said shyly as he was practically hiding behind his older brother.

            She turned to face Bucky.  “I’m sorry, I don’t believe we’ve met.  I’m Harrison’s teacher, Peggy, and you are--”

            “James.”  Bucky shook her hand.  “Friend of the family. Just trying to help out however I can.”

            “Bless you.  It’s a pleasure to meet you,” she said politely as she looked back to Harrison.  “Come now, darling. I want to see some more art from you today.”

            Harrison slowly left Howie’s side and followed Peggy into the classroom.

            “I’m next,” Maria said as they made their way towards the exit.

            They filed back into the car.  Howie showed Bucky how to work Jamie’s car seat before they made their way off to the next school.

            The other school was just up the block, and the drop-off was exponentially easier.  He just had to pull up to the entrance and Maria just hopped out of the car and went right into the school.

            “Thank you,” Howie said once Maria was out of sight.  “I know that you’re not… This isn’t your job.”

            “My job is to keep you safe,” Bucky said.  “In my opinion, being in a public place with qualified adults watching after you is part of that.”

            “Still,” Howie said.  “I appreciate it.”

            “Don’t sweat it.  These things happen,” Bucky said as he pulled out of the parking lot.

            Howie’s school was under five minutes away from there and it was another easy drop off.  Overall, the errand could have been far worse. The baby hadn’t even been an issue, the kid had just slept the entire time they were in the car.

            When he returned to the house, Steve was still not out of his bedroom.  Bucky went back up the steps, holding Jamie tightly. He got back up to the third floor and went back into the master bedroom.  Steve hadn’t moved an inch since Bucky had left him there. His comforter was still on the ground.

            “Get up,” Bucky said bitterly.

            Steve ignored him.  He just shoved his head back underneath the pillow.

            “Steve, get up,” Bucky said, letting his frustration show.  He wasn’t fucking around.

            “No,” Steve practically growled.

            “I’m not your nanny,” Bucky spat.  “The baby is up, so you should be too.”

            “No one asked you to take them--” Steve began.

            “Actually your son did,” Bucky said as he crossed his arms. “You’re supposed to be a parent--”

            “Spare me the lecture,” Steve snarked.  “You can leave Jamie in the crib. I’m here, so there’s no issue--”

            “I don’t know how _safe_ that would be for Jamie,” Bucky said honestly.  “I told you. I take this seriously.”

            Steve scoffed.  “I’m more than capable.”

            “You can’t even get out of bed,” Bucky said angrily.

            Steve let out an aggravated groan as he finally stood up from the bed.  “Happy?”

            “Not really,” Bucky said honestly.  “I take the safety of you and your children extremely seriously.  I didn’t think that I’d have to protect them from _you_.”

            That must have struck a nerve, because Steve got right up in his face.  “Don’t you fucking dare--”

            “Neglect is a form of child abuse, Steve.  I could just make one call and have your kids moved to a safe house.  You want this arrangement? You’ve got to suck it up for your kids,” Bucky spat.

            Steve laughed at him.  “You’ve been here--what--three weeks?  You have no idea what it’s like to be a parent--”

            “No, I don’t,” Bucky agreed.  “But I do know what it’s like to _not_ be one, and it’s _remarkably_ similar to what you’re doing right now.”

            “How dare you--”

            “Open your eyes!”  Bucky yelled. “When is the last time you left the house? When is the last time you got your kids ready for school?  When is the last time you had a meaningful conversation with any of them, for that matter?  When is the last time you even bathed, or made sure _they_ bathed?  I’m not your nanny.  I’m your security. If I think that the safety of you and your children is in jeopardy, I can pull the plug on this thing.  The government will stick you in a safe house for the rest of your days. Get it together.”

Steve’s face contorted.  He looked as though Bucky had just slapped him across the face.  “I’m trying! I--I don’t know what to say to them! I don’t have answers for them.”

            Bucky froze.  He was no therapist.  He had kind of just been ranting, he didn’t think that Steve was really listening to him.  “You’ve got to try. Otherwise, this mission cannot be justified, you understand? We’re bending a lot of rules for you here.”

            “We just want our life back,” Steve said helplessly.

            “That’s not gonna happen, regardless of how things pan out here.  Your husband passed away. This is your new normal. Your kids need you.  They’re barely holding it together,” Bucky said as he thought back to Howie.

            Steve sat on the edge of the bed and put his head in his hands.  “I don’t know how to help them.”

            “Fake it,” Bucky said as he sat down next to him.  “Fake it and eventually they’ll believe it. Maybe if you fake it for long enough, you’ll start to believe it too.  They need a parent, Steve.”

            Steve shook his head.  “I don’t know if I can do this without him.  He always knew what to say--what to do.”

            Bucky frowned as he awkwardly patted Steve’s shoulder.  “You did it while he was away developing JARVIS. For what it’s worth, they’re good kids.  You must have done something right.”

            Steve let out a laugh, followed by some sniffles.  “They got most of that from Tony. He was so good with them.”

            Bucky frowned.  He wasn’t sure how true that was.  Bucky had been with Stark for a short period of time and all the guy talked about was Steve and how he was raising their kids while Tony spent most of his time working on JARVIS.  “He talked about you a lot. He gave you pretty much all the parenting credit.”

            Steve looked at him with a glow in his bright blue eyes.  It was as if Bucky had just told him that he’d discovered a miracle.  “You spoke to him?”

            Bucky nodded.  “Well, he mostly spoke at me.  He liked to hear himself talk.”

            Steve gave a small laugh as he wiped his eyes.  “Sounds like him.”

            “He never shut up about you guys,” Bucky said honestly.

            “Did he suffer?” Steve asked, his voice was barely audible.

            Bucky shook his head.  “No. It was quick. He didn’t even see it coming.”  It was true. None of them had any idea it was coming.

            Steve let out a small sigh of relief.  “At least that’s something. I was worried that he bled out.  I couldn’t get that image of him out of my head. Laying there on the ground, helpless.  Waiting. I lost a lot of guys like that. I’m glad he didn’t have to go through that.”

            Bucky knew what that was like.  He’d lost his fair share of comrades that way.  Infection was a shit way to go too. It wasn’t like that for Stark.  Whoever killed him wanted to ensure that recovery wasn’t an option. “It was quick.  He was gone before he hit the ground.”

            Steve took a deep breath.  “Good. I’m glad he didn’t suffer.  That’s the one comfort I can take in all this.”

            Bucky stood up and walked over to the door.  “Steve, you need to get it together. I can’t do my job if I’m doing yours too.”

            Steve frowned.  “I’ll do my best.  You have got to be more understanding.  My family is in shambles. If you’re gonna be living here day in and day out, you’re gonna have to deal with the emotions too.  My husband is dead. My kids just lost their father. There are gonna be days like this.”

            “You’ve had a few days like this…”

            “My husband’s been dead a month, cut me some slack.” Steve crossed his arms.

            “Yeah, and Howie lost one father a month ago, and now he’s compensating for the other.  I’m no therapist, but this isn’t gonna work if you don’t get it together. Otherwise, we might as well just go to a safe house right now.”

            “I don’t need you to tell me how to raise my children--”

            “Someone has to look out for them.  As security, that is kind of my job.  I’m not judging. If foreign powers weren’t after you and your kids, I’d be more willing to let this go for a while,” Bucky said honestly.  “This could literally be the difference between life and death.”

            “I’ll work on it,” Steve relented.  “You need to be more patient. This isn’t an exact science.  We’re doing our best. I’m doing my best. This situation isn’t exactly fucking normal, Sergeant.  We can’t even mourn properly because the government and potential terrorists are watching our every moves.”

            It was fair.  As uncomfortable as this situation made Bucky, he couldn't imagine what it must have been like for the family.  “I will make an effort to be more patient.”

            “Thank you,” Steve said as he lifted his hands up and brought them down on his knees.  “I’m trying.”

            Bucky raised an eyebrow, but didn’t say anything.  It didn’t look like Steve was trying. He wasn’t going to comment, though.  He had no clue what the other man was going through. He glanced over to the pack and play where Jamie was playing with his blocks.

            “The kid’s in the--”

            “Yeah.  I can see that,” Steve said, a hint of annoyance in his voice.  “I’ve got him.”

            Bucky held his tongue.  He was going to have to pick and choose his battles here.  If he was going to exist in this house, then he was going to have to let some stuff go.  He walked out of the bedroom and walked back down the steps to the second floor. He went into his bedroom and took a seat at his desk.

            Bucky looked back at his tablet and continued going over the Sarah Reports, as Barton called them.  His comrade had reported that the oldest daughter had been very cooperative. She had agreed to wear the tracker with no argument.  It looked like she was in her dorm room. Bucky looked over her class schedule as he examined her small red dot on his screen. She didn’t have a lot of classes  She was taking a few online courses and two or three of them were on campus. Bucky didn’t understand. Why go away to school if she wasn’t even taking too many classes on campus?  If she didn’t need to be on campus often, why wouldn’t she have stuck around after Stark died?

            There were so many questions he wanted to ask, but Barton worked differently than he did.  He watched from afar. Bucky was certain that if he had Barton ask Sarah these questions, it would be pointless.  The way that Barton operated was to make his subject almost completely forget that he was there. Out of sight, out of mind.  He wanted Sarah’s surveillance to be as hands-off as possible, and it was a big part of why Bucky had picked Barton for this job.  Still. Bucky didn’t trust Rogers, and he _definitely_ didn’t trust that daughter.  

            Even as he was monitoring the girl, everything seemed almost too perfect.  It was like she was trying to make everything appear normal for his benefit.  She’d just lost her father. It would make sense for her to be surrounding herself with friends, or even going out and trying to distract herself.  Instead, the girl was hauled up in her dorm room all day on her laptop. It wasn’t as though she had any friends come over and her roommate only stopped by to sleep--some nights. Sarah had almost no communication with her peers.  Something was going on. Bucky just wasn’t sure what yet.

            He decided to switch gears.  He wasn’t getting anywhere staring at the bleeping red dot that indicated her location.  Bucky decided to re-run the background check on Harrison’s teacher, Peggy. He knew it was a stretch, but she was from England, and there certainly were stranger things than terrorists recruiting impressionable young Englishmen.  

            Bucky ran the name Margaret “Peggy” Carter through any database he could think of.  The only thing that came up was that she had volunteered with the U.N. in Lagos, Nigeria following the bombings that had happened there a few years prior.  It was certainly an interesting piece of information. It was possible that she could have come into contact with a terrorist affiliate at that time. There were a wealth of nations that had sent volunteers over to help.  It was almost impossible to determine how many people had gone over there, and even harder to determine who she may have come in contact with. Still, this thin lead was the only thing he had.

            Bucky began diving into any and all research on the excursion.  He needed to determine how long she was there for and if he could get any leads on who she may had been in contact with.  That could be instrumental to his investigation.

            Bucky looked at all of the paperwork that he had on the volunteer project.  Peggy was only there for two weeks and the cause certainly seemed to be legitimate.  The organization that she went with had absolutely no ties to terrorism, and it seemed like she spent most of her time with one of the girls, Angela, that went on the excursion with her.  

            Still, he wanted to be safe.  After being there for three weeks, this was the only lead he had.  He took a deep breath as he pulled everyone’s name that he could find that was associated with the Lagos relief effort.  He ran every name through all the databases and waited.

            Bucky rubbed his forehead as he glanced up at the clock.  The kids should be finishing up school. He pulled up the tracking system on his tablet again.  This time, he paid special attention to Harrison’s little red dot. The four-year-old was exactly where he was supposed to be.  The problem was that meant that he was with Peggy.

            He took a deep breath.  He knew what he needed to do.  The issue was, that meant that the baby would have to stay with Steve.  Bucky wasn’t sure how he felt about any of the kids being left alone with Steve, nevermind the baby.

            Bucky groaned as he stood up from his desk and marched back upstairs to the master bedroom.  He was relieved to see that Steve and Jamie were no longer in there. He left the room and made his way over to the living room.  Steve was sitting on his knees. The baby was clutching Steve’s two index fingers and standing on his own. Steve was just helping the little one balance.  It was actually pretty sweet to watch. It was a moment that Tony Stark should have been there to see. It was a moment that Bucky suddenly felt like he was intruding on.  He was about to leave when Steve looked over and saw him.

            “Everything okay?” His face became serious again.  Bucky realized it had been the first time that he’d seen Steve not look completely miserable, and the misery came right back the moment he saw Bucky.

            “Yeah, I was gonna head out, follow a few leads.  If you need anything--”

            “I’ll call,” Steve said shortly.  He brought his attention back to Jamie, who stumbled for a moment.  Bucky took that as his cue to leave. Steve could have that moment with his son.

            Bucky drove down by Harrison’s school.  He’d bugged the security bracelets, so that he could hear what was going on when he was in range of the devices.

            He’d parked on the side of the school and took out the tablet.  He selected Harrison’s dot and plugged in his earpiece.

            “All right,” Peggy’s voice echoed in his ear.  “Let’s see how our water colors came out!”

            Bucky wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting.  It wasn’t as though she’d kidnap the kid during the middle of the school day.  Besides, she’d had access to Harrison for months. If she was a part of this, she wasn’t going to make a move unprepared.

            Bucky threw his head back in frustration.  He wasn’t sure what to expect. He was just trying to finish this mission so that he could move on to something else, and so this family could move on with their lives.

            Bucky turned off the bug when Peggy started talking about mixing colors.  Slow and steady he reminded himself. He glanced up at the roof of his car.  He just wanted to get back to his life. He didn’t need to be intruding on this family.  He’d much rather be on a mission in hostile territory taking down terrorists than babysitting billionaires. . . especially considering that he felt directly responsible for their grief.

            Bucky was snapped out of the thought by his phone vibrating.  His eyes shot down to the phone and saw it was a message from Barton.  He opened it immediately. Maybe this was a stronger lead than his dead end.

            All it said was “We need to talk.  Call will be established at 1600 hours.”  Barton was going to call him from a secure location at 4pm.  He had to appreciate how seriously his comrade was taking this.

            Bucky glanced back towards the school.  Harrison was safe. Still, he turned the bug back on to be sure.  Peggy was now explaining how to make green by mixing blue and yellow.  He turned it back off and admitted defeat. He’d still keep an eye on her, but Peggy had unlimited access to Harrison and had yet to do anything since Stark died.  If she was involved, she’d probably would have made her move by now. It would have been easy, given Steve’s flighty parenting and the fact that there was a laundry list of people who were picking up and dropping off the kids from school.  It was a wonder that none of them had been released to the wrong adult on accident. It would be easy for a hostile to take these kids. Which made Bucky seriously question his security plan. It didn’t take her off the hook, it just cast more doubt.

            He looked back to his cell phone.  Maybe Barton had insight into this. Maybe this could be the lead that they had been waiting for.  Maybe Sarah knew something about JARVIS. Perhaps, she was the one who had it all along.

 

 


	5. Chapter 4

            Bucky had been back at the home for about an hour.  He was hauled up in the bedroom waiting for Barton’s call.  Most of the children were on the way home. Steve was watching some children’s program on TV with Jamie.  Bucky was glad that the house was quiet. It gave him a chance to really look over the case. It was strange when the house wasn’t filled with noise and children.  Even when the older children were at school, the baby had been fussy during the time that his siblings were absent. Not today.

            Today, it left Bucky with an eerie feeling.  Despite the fact that Pierce felt certain that the tech was somewhere in the house, Barnes’s certainty was dwindling.  Tony Stark seemed to have really done his best to keep his tech out of enemy hands. He wouldn’t have just left it behind for someone to stumble upon.

            While he was looking over the house, he couldn’t shake the feeling that he was missing something.  It was infuriating that perhaps the oldest daughter had been hiding something right under their noses.  Still, he didn’t want to jump to conclusions. Barton could have any sort of information to share. There was a good chance that it wasn’t the smoking gun that they were looking for.

            As if on cue, his phone began to vibrate.  Barton. Bucky answered the phone on the first ring.  “Barnes.”

            “Are you alone?” Barton’s voice rang in his ear.

            “Yes,” Bucky said as he entered his bedroom and locked the door behind him.  

            “Likewise,” Barton affirmed.

            “What’s going on with the girl?” Bucky asked, cutting to the chase.

            Barton let out a sigh.  “I don’t think I’m the only one watching her.”

            Bucky paused.  That wasn’t what he was expecting.  “Are you sure?”

            “Do you trust my insights?” Barton asked.

            He did.  It was the main reason he’d chosen Barton for this assignment in the first place.  “Yes.”

            “I have an inkling.  I can _feel_ someone else watching.  I just can’t pinpoint them… yet.”

            “Do you think she should be extracted?” Bucky asked.  The family’s safety was still the top priority. JARVIS or not.

            “Not yet,” Barton said.  “I think she’s hiding something.”

            That felt liberating to hear.  It was good to know that he wasn’t the only one who had his doubts about the daughter.  Bucky paused, considering their options. He still didn’t feel comfortable leaving the girl in harm’s way.  “Do you want me to send in a larger team to investigate? They don’t even need to know about your presence--”

            “No,” Barton said seriously.  “I don’t want to bring anyone else in.  Whoever is watching her… I can’t be sure that it’s not one of our guys.”

            That was a unique take.  “You think that this might be an inside job?”

            “No,” Barton said as if Bucky had put words in his mouth.  “I just can’t disprove it. I’d rather be paranoid in this case.  I don’t think I need to remind you that they shouldn’t have been able to get to Stark in the first place.  We can’t rule out the possibility that there may be a leak.”

            Bucky had to admit that Barton was raising valid points.  Points that he hadn’t considered himself up until this point.  Still, they had to do _something_.  They couldn’t just wait around for something to happen.  “Do you think they’ll make a move if she’s in public?”

            There was silence.  And then, “Probably not.  Why?”

            “I want access to her computer.  I’m assuming you weren’t able to hack into it.  It wasn’t in your reports.”

            “No.  And neither could any of our guys,” Barton said.  “Someone wants to make sure that we can’t see what’s on her laptop.”

            Bucky let out a breath in frustration.  “Do you think you’d be able to get access to the information if you got to the laptop physically?”

            “More likely than not,” Barton said.  “I’m sure the techs could hook me up with some spyware that she wouldn’t be able to detect.  It’s just a matter of getting access.”

            Bucky nodded to himself.  There was one clear course of action, but it wasn’t without its risks.  “I need you to go back to the dorm when she’s in class. Get access to that computer.  At the very least, this could help us keep her safer. At best…” his voice trailed off.

            “At best this could crack the case wide open,” Barton finished for him.  That was certainly the goal, but he wasn’t optimistic enough to put too much hope into this either.  Clearly Stark had done an expert job at keeping the tech hidden.

            “Sarge,” Clint said.  “Don’t get me wrong… I think this is the best option, but are you authorizing me to leave her unattended?”

            Bucky sighed.  “Yes. I have access to her location.  I’ll make sure I’m monitoring her location and surroundings while you’re in the dorm. Let me know when you leave her and let me know when you get her back in your sights.”

            “I’ll keep you posted,” Barton said.

            “Yes, you will,” Bucky said sternly.  “You need to give me the info ahead of time.  I’m only allotting you fifteen minutes for you to leave her and head back.  Anything more than that will leave her too vulnerable.”

            “Right,” Barton said.  “I’ll brief you before and after.  I understand how sensitive this assignment is.”

            “Good,” Bucky said as he hung up the phone.  He trusted Barton, but this was a time sensitive situation.  He wanted to be done with this assignment. If he could get the tech, then the family would be safe and Bucky could go back to his active duty position rather than playing house with Rogers.

            The house erupted with noise.  Bucky glanced at the clock. 4 o’clock.  They were home. The baby started crying and Bucky immediately started wishing for the silence to come back.  He wasn’t sure if he’d ever get used to the constant noise that came with all the children.

            Bucky walked out of the bedroom and made his way back downstairs.  If the kids were home, then he should be around to keep a watchful eye.  It was a Tuesday, so all the kids were there except for Harrison, who was at soccer practice and Maria who was at student council.  

            Bucky usually stayed in the living area while the kids did their homework in the dining room.  He was close enough to observe what was happening in that room, but far enough away that they didn’t feel as though he was watching them too closely.  They were just kids. He imagined that they needed some space. Besides, he never really knew how to talk to the younger kids. Howie was more of an adult than Steve seemed most days, so he was the only one that he actively spoke with.  Even then, though, it was mostly just for updates to see if anything suspicious had been going on.

            This afternoon was different.  There was a noise that Bucky rarely heard from anyone other than the baby.  Laughter. Howie, AJ, and Talia were in the dining room laughing. It never really occurred to Bucky just how rare it was to hear that noise in the loud home.  It made him feel sick. What kind of home filled with children had a laughter famine? Not many. He felt the guilt begin to creep its way to the forefront of his mind.  This family was shattered because Bucky had failed to protect Stark. If Stark were alive, he was certain that the home would constantly be filled with the most musical laughter that anyone had ever heard.  

            Almost as quickly as the joyous noise had started, it was over.  In fact, the tone felt graver than it had before. It was as if they had forgotten a moment, that laughter was forbidden in that home.  It was horrifying.

            Bucky took a deep breath as he walked into the dining room.  “How’s homework coming?”

            Howie’s head snapped up, it was as if he’d been ripped out of some deep pensive thought.  “I think we’re okay.”

            The twins weren’t even looking at their homework.  They were looking at their shoes solemnly. It was clear that the last thing on their minds were their sentence diagrams.

            “I thought it might be a good idea for you to take a break from homework,” Bucky said slowly.  “I have some,” he glanced around to make sure that no one was listening; it was mostly for show, “ _security_ stuff… that I want to run past all of you.”

            AJ’s eyes lit up at that.  “What kind of stuff? Do we get badges?”

            Bucky shook his head.  “Not yet… this is top secret.  If anyone found a badge it would blow your cover.”

            “Oh,” AJ said in an excited whisper.  “What do you need us to do?”

            Bucky couldn’t help but grin at that.  It wasn’t laughter, but excitement was a close second.  “I’m worried about… _spies_.”

            Talia glanced at him at the mention of spies.  “Like in the movies?”

            Bucky nodded.  “ _Exactly_ like in the movies.”

            “I need you to tell me everything about your school days.  We need to make sure there are no suspicious characters hanging around,” Bucky said, trying to make sure that he sounded serious.

            AJ  erupted.  He told him everything.   _Everything_.  The kid barely took a breath.  He told Bucky every little detail from getting in the building to getting picked up at dismissal.  He even included an interesting story about a substitute art teacher. That was interesting. Bucky hadn’t given the substitutes the same level of attention that he had give to the regular staff.  Maybe it was time to reexamine that.

            Talia was different.  She wasn’t as detailed as her twin brother, but she did mention that some girl was suddenly trying to be her friend after being awful to her from the beginning of the school year.  Perhaps, he was underestimating his enemy. There was no reason why kids couldn’t be involved in this. It wouldn’t be too hard to plant a child in the school to befriend the kids, while there was an adult pulling the strings in the background.  He hadn’t considered that angle yet.

            After about twenty minutes of listening to the twins spill their guts, they went back to work on their homework.  Their moods had drastically improved, and Bucky was glad that he was able to help them feel a little bit better. Howie, on the other hand, still looked depressed as he worked on his assignments.

            Bucky wasn’t sure how to help him.  Kids were always easier to cheer up.  There was a lot about death, that they didn’t understand yet.  They were only six years old. Too young to really understand the finality of it.  Howie was a teenager, he knew how grim death really was, and he wouldn’t be distracted by fake missions.

            When the twins finished up their work, they raced up the steps whispering about whether they thought anything was suspicious.  It was sweet.

            “What was that about?” Howie asked.

            “I don’t know.  I just figured, that they could use a distraction,” Bucky said honestly.  “Besides, I think they had some unique insights. It was more helpful than I thought it would be.”

            “Oh,” Howie said.  “It’s just… you’ve never taken an interest before.”

            Bucky frowned at that.  “I’m just trying to keep you all safe--”

            “You’re trying to find JARVIS,” Howie cut him off.  “Our safety is secondary to finding Dad’s tech.”

            “No. No, it’s not.  It’s the other way around.  The tech is secondary. That said, the sooner I find it, the sooner all of you will be safe.  The people that came after your dad wanted to get their hands on his work. If we can find it, then we can bring it to our people, and you won’t be targets,” Bucky said honestly.  “Finding the tech is important, but it’s only important because of how much safer you’ll be once we find it.”

            Howie scoffed.  “I doubt that. Why would the U.S. Government really care if _our_ family is safe?  Plenty of people die in service to their country.  You’re here because the government wants you to find JARVIS--”  

            “I’m not going to pretend to know the government’s motives.   _My_ motives, on the other hand… there is nothing that I take more seriously than your safety.” Bucky crossed his arms as he leaned back in his chair.

            Howie bit his lip as he shook his head and leaned back in his own chair, mirroring him.  “I’m sorry if I have a hard time believing that. I think you mean well, but my dad is _dead_ and he trusted you.  Why should we?”

            “I don’t have an answer for you,” Bucky said honestly.  “I know that I failed your father. It’s all the more reason why I’m taking this seriously.  I will not make the same mistake twice.”

            “I hope so,” Howie said.  “I can’t lose anyone else.”

            Bucky nodded.  Howie had been the one to step up.  He was practically both parents to his siblings.  It made sense that he was more protective than the other children were.  He had to wonder if there was something to be said there. The oldest was off at school, while Howie was left to watch after the younger kids.  Maybe there was some resentment there. It was another route for him to consider. Howie might have known more than he was letting on.

            The door cracked open and Harrison raced into the house.  Maria was sauntering in behind him. “Hey,” a cheery voice rang from the doorway.  It was Riley, Wilson’s husband. He did drop offs every so often.

            Bucky gave a tight smile as Riley placed the backpacks on the floor near the front door.  

            “Steve around?” Riley asked.

            “Probably upstairs,” Howie grumbled.  “I haven’t seen him all day.”

            Riley’s bright smile faltered at that.  “The baby up there with him?”

            “Yup,” Howie said popping the ‘p.’  “I’m sure he’s up there trying to figure out if Jamie has an off switch.”

            Riley looked down before glancing at the staircase.  “I can go up there to check on him real quick. Make sure the baby doesn’t need a change or something.”

            “Would you?” Howie asked, relief washing over his face.  “I haven’t given him a bath in a few days.”

            Riley’s eyes lit up at that.  “I can take care of that! Maybe, I’ll call Sam, we can have dinner over here, like we used to.  I’ll cook!”

            Howie actually smiled at that.  “Yeah? It’s a school night. I don’t know--”

            “We’ll be gone by eight.  I’ll make something easy,” Riley said dismissively.  “When’s the last time you’ve had a proper home-cooked meal?”

            “The _last time_ you came over and cooked,” Howie said with a sad laugh.

            “It’s decided.  I’m making your favorite.  I’m just gonna run over to the store real quick and pick up some chicken and potatoes!  It’s gonna be just like old times,” Riley said, practically skipping as he raced over to the door.  “Let your Pops know that he’d better be decent, because we’re coming over for dinner whether he likes it or not.”

            Howie gave a small chuckle at that.  “I’ll make sure he gets the message.”

            Riley grinned as opened the front door a crack.  “I’ll be back in a little bit.”

            Howie gave a small wave as Riley closed the door behind him.  Bucky couldn’t help but be impressed. All it took was Riley offering dinner at their own home to put Howie in a better mood.  The kid had a lukewarm attitude at best as far as Bucky had seen. Maybe he was overthinking this. Maybe it would be easier to get the kids on his good side than he thought.  They probably had their own insights into all this, regardless of the reliability issues. He had decoded advanced enemy messages, he could piece things together from the accounts of children.

            Howie closed up his book a few moments later and put his things in his backpack.  “I guess I better tell Pops that there’ll be company,” he excused himself. Howie smiled tightly and made his way up the steps.  

            Bucky took a deep breath as he wracked his head thinking of ways to bond with these kids.  He didn’t do kids, not even when he was a kid. He never understood all the energy and excitement over miniscule things.  Bonding with them was going to be a tall order, but Stark was close with his kids, and they may have known something without even realizing it.

            He didn’t have much time to ruminate on his thoughts.  There was a large crash through from the upper floor. Bucky raced up the steps.  There was shrieking, and it was definitely different from the usual noise that just came from kids being kids.  

            Bucky bolted through the house towards the screams.  He made his way into the master bedroom. There was a broken vase, but that was it.

            “Is everyone all right?” Bucky asked nervously.

            “No,” Steve said from the bed.  “Harrison’s cut his foot open. I may have to run him to get stitches.”  He was trying to remove shards of glass from the young boy’s foot.

            Bucky frowned as he walked over to them.  “Can I take a look at it?”

            Steve looked at him oddly.  He nodded, seemingly reluctant, as he stood up and watched over his shoulder.  Bucky took an antiseptic swab that he kept in his pockets and began disinfecting the foot.  The cuts looked worse than they were. They weren’t too deep, and Steve seemed to have done a good job getting the shards out of the young boy’s foot.

            “I don’t think he’ll need stitches.  Maybe just a trip to the pediatrician tomorrow to make sure you got all the glass out.”

            Harrison, to his credit, was hardly even crying.  He had a few tears running down his face, but Bucky would have expected more weeping than anything.  This was a tough little kid.

            “I’ll go get some bandages and then you can take him to the doctor tomorrow.” Bucky glanced over to the broken vase.  “After, I’ll help clean up the glass.”

            “I can take care of that,” Howie said from the corner of the room.  He was near the window, watching on. His hands were on the top of his head  and this clearly upset him for some reason. It wasn’t all that serious. It was just some broken glass.  

            “That’s okay,” Bucky said nonchalantly.  “I don’t think we need anyone else to get cut.  I’ve got some heavy duty gloves and I’ll vacuum up after.”

            They were all watching him closely, like they were waiting for him to do something.  Bucky slowly walked out of the room. The moment he closed the door behind him, he heard harsh sobs coming from inside the bedroom.  He paused, listening carefully. He could almost hear hushing noises overlaying the soft sobs. What the hell was going on? He considered going back inside, but he decided against it.  It was odd, but he didn’t know what to think. It could have just been a coping mechanism, seem brave in front of strangers, but why would they shush him after he had already left the room?

            Bucky walked down the steps to go get his medical supplies.  He got his gloves out and some alcohol swabs. He grabbed the rest of the first aid kit and made his way back up the steps.  He quieted his footsteps as he got closer to the door. He didn’t want them to hear him coming. He wasn’t even sure why he wanted to see what was going on inside the room when he wasn’t there.  He just couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off.

            Bucky leaned in closely and pressed his ear to the door.  He listened intently, trying to see if anything unusual was going on.  There were distinct sobs now, and he could make out Steve speaking soothingly.  He couldn’t make out any words exactly, but he could hear the soft, gentle tone.  This was certainly different than when he had left the room, and the little one had not dared to make a noise.

            Bucky lightly tapped his fingers against the door.  It wasn’t loud enough to be distinct, just loud enough to grab a morsel of attention.

            “Wait!  Wait,” He heard Howie’s muffled voice.  “Shush--I thought I heard something.”

            As if on command, the sobs stopped.  Even Steve’s sweet whispers came to a halt.  Bucky could practically feel the tension coming from the other side of the door.  Strange. What the hell? This was not typical behavior.

            Bucky paused and waited a minute before he knocked on the door hard.  “Hey,” he poked his head in. “I got some supplies.”

            The little one looked fearfully at him as he got closer.  Bucky looked around the room, everyone was watching him. He cleared his throat as he handed the supplies to Steve.  “You good to handle this? I’ll clean up the glass.”

            Steve visibly exhaled as he took the first aid kit from Bucky.  “Yeah, that’s a good idea.”

            Bucky walked over to the adjoined master bath and grabbed the dust pan from under the sink.  He’d taken an inventory of everything in each room when he’d first gotten there. Bucky went back into the room and began sweeping up the chunks of glass.  He glanced over to where Steve was on the bed with Harrison. The little one had his head back against the pillows as Steve was gingerly inspecting his foot to make sure that there were no pieces of glass still hiding in the cuts.

            Bucky didn’t say anything as he walked back into the bathroom to throw the glass away.  He put the dustpan back and took out the handheld vacuum. He brought the vacuum over and began vacuuming the area incase he missed any shards.  “Hey, you guys might not want to sleep on the floor tonight until you’ve properly vacuumed over here. The last thing we need is anyone else getting cut.”

            Steve nodded as he kissed the sole of Harrison’s foot and released the boy.  “That’s a good call.”

            “Uncle Riley is coming over,” Howie said, clearly trying to seem normal.  “He’s gonna make dinner. He said it’s non-negotiable.”

            Steve frowned, but he didn’t argue.  

            Bucky looked around the room.  The kids were all jittery and excited upon hearing that Sam and Riley were coming.  The room was practically buzzing. It was almost as good as the laughing.

            “You heard your brother,” Steve said, still not smiling.  It didn’t make sense. Bucky couldn’t keep from smiling and these weren’t even his children.  “Go get ready. Your uncles will be over soon.”

            The kids all began racing out of the bedroom.  Even little Harrison had hopped off of the bed and made his way out of the room.  Bucky felt himself ease up at that. He was fine. It didn’t explain what had happened before he entered the room.  It was as if he was afraid for Bucky to see him cry. Why?

            Steve walked over to where Jamie was sitting on the floor with his toys.  The toddler appeared to have no idea that anything had happened. He picked the baby up and sniffed his bottom.  Bucky never understood. Either the kid smelled or he didn’t. Still, he remained silent as Steve placed the baby on his hip and began looking through his drawers.

            “How did the vase break?” Bucky asked.

            “I’m sorry?”

            “The vase.  How did it break?” Bucky repeated.  “I just wanted to make sure everything is secure.”

            Steve blinked.  “I have children, Sergeant.  Things break. A lot of things break in this house--”

            “Really?” Bucky crossed his arms.  “I’ve been here about a month now and this is the first time anything has broken.”

            “What’s your point?” Steve put his free hand on his other hip.

            “I just wanted to make sure that--”

            “That what?  Someone doesn’t have it out for my glassware?” Steve scoffed.  “The kids were running around and they knocked over the vase. That’s it.  Not everything is some conspiracy.”

            “I didn’t say that it was,” Bucky said defensively.  “I just wanted to make sure that it wasn’t something preventable.”

            Steve shook his head.  “The only way to prevent it would be to remove all children from the home--”

            “Like I’ve previously suggested--”

            “We are _not_ going to a safe house!” Steve snapped.  “There have literally been no threats against our family since you showed up!  The worst thing that’s happened is that a vase broke! Maybe the enemy intelligence operatives, realize that we don’t have JARVIS here!”

            As if on cue, the lights cut out.  Bucky froze. There was real yelling, and this was not a whimsical mistake.  “Steve, stay here. Don’t open the door unless I knock three times.”

            “I’m not staying here--”

            “You have the baby!” Bucky hissed.  “Let me do my job! Stay here! I don’t need to worry about you too!”

            “Fine,” Steve snapped.  

            Bucky bolted out of the room and began trying to find the kids.  He didn’t want a hostage situation. He found the twins first. They were hiding in the bathroom, sitting in the tub with the shower curtain closed.

            He let out a sigh of relief.  “Go to your Pa’s room. Knock three times.”

            Talia shook her head and cried.  “No--no, I’m too scared. Just stay here, please.”

            Bucky frowned as he held his hand out.  “Come with me. I’ll take you to him, but you can’t stay here.”

            “Why not?” She cried out.

            Bucky took a deep breath.  “I have to find your brothers and sister.  I need the two of you to come with me.”

            AJ nodded as he stood up, and pulled Talia out with him.  “You’ll keep us safe?”

            “But Papa said--”

            “Papa’s not here,” AJ  snapped. “We need to get somewhere safe and Papa isn’t here.”  He looked over to Bucky. “Take us someplace safe.”

            “Come on,” Bucky whispered as he peered down the hall and led the kids to the master bedroom.  Bucky knocked three times before the door opened and he ushered the kids in.

            “Thank god,” Steve whispered.

            “I’ll be back.  Try to barricade the door for now.”  Bucky headed off back down the hall. He was peering in all of the rooms trying to find the other kids, and looking to see if anyone else might be inside the home.  Stark’s home ran on renewable energy that was on a loop. It was supposed to eradicate the threat of power outages. This could not be good.

            Bucky made his way to the second floor when he caught a glimpse of another person in the home.  It definitely was not one of the kids. The figure was dressed in all black and they were almost his height.  Howie was at least a head shorter than him.

            The figure wasn’t worried about being subtle, they were just looking through drawers in a decorative table in the hall.  They were probably looking for JARVIS. Bucky had an advantage, though. The intruder wasn’t paying much attention to their surroundings, they were just ransacking the table.

            Bucky was easily able to come up behind him and get him in a sleeper-hold. This could subdue him quietly.  Bucky then grabbed his cuffs that he had in the pocket of his utility vest. He handcuffed the intruder and then dragged him into the bathroom.  Bucky hoisted them into the tub before he quickly left in an attempt to find the other children.

            Bucky raced back to the second floor and resumed looking for the children, or another intruder.  He doubted that this was a one man job. He found Maria hiding in her bedroom. She was on the floor underneath her desk.  She was clutching something close to her chest that Bucky couldn’t make out.

            “Maria,” Bucky whispered.  “Come with me, I’ve gotta get you someplace safe.”

            She crawled out from under the desk, still holding the thing close to her.  “What do you need me to do?”

            Bucky put up his index finger to signal that he needed a minute.  He listened closely. It didn’t sound like anyone was in their general area, and he couldn’t hear any footsteps above him.  He opened the door a crack and peered out into the hall. The coast was clear. Bucky turned back to face Maria.

            “Stay behind me and keep close,” he said, barely audible.  The ten-year-old shuffled over to him as he opened the door wider.  He looked both ways before he motioned for her to follow him. He was leading her over to the steps when he heard a crash coming from the first floor. _Shit._

            “Maria,” Bucky said quietly.  “I need you to run up to your parents’ bedroom.  Knock three times, and then they will let you in.”

            Her eyes widened.  “I thought you said you were coming with me?”

            Bucky sighed.  “Maria, I’ve only found you and the twins so far.  That means that Harrison and Howie are still in the house somewhere and you heard the noise downstairs.  I know you’re safe. If you get into any trouble on the top floor scream! Scream and I will come right for you.  But I need you to get upstairs right now.”

            She gulped, but nodded after a moment.  “Okay.”

            Bucky motioned for her to head up an she bolted up the steps like her life depended on it.  Against his better judgment, Bucky waited and listened to hear her knock on the door three times.  The moment he heard the door crack open, he raced down the steps.

            The second he got to the first floor he froze.  Howie was standing at the foot of the steps. Harrison was right behind him.  However in front of them stood another intruder, and Howie was pointing a gun at them.  So much for no firearms in the home.

            “Howie,” Bucky said softly.

            Howie’s head snapped to look at him, but his hands didn’t move.  He’d done this before, that or he’d been trained. “Sarge, they… they broke in.  They tried to grab Harrison. I--”

            “You’re doing great,” Bucky said as he inched closer to him.  “You kept your brother safe. How about you let me take it from here?”

            Howie looked conflicted as he looked between the intruder and Bucky a few times.  However there wasn’t time for Howie to answer because the intruder took the opportunity to draw their own firearm, and Bucky didn’t hesitate to grab the gun from his holster and fire at the intruder.  They were dead before they could even touch their own trigger.

            “Christ!” Howie shouted as he dropped his own weapon.  “Oh my god, you--you--”

            “I know,” Bucky said as Harrison was covering his ears looking from Bucky to Howie.  “Listen, that’s not important right now. I don’t know if there is anyone else in the house.  You need to get Harrison to safety, okay? Take your brother and bring him to the master bedroom.  Everyone else is up there. Knock three times.”

            “But, but I-- I mean you--” Howie was stammering looking at the body that lay in front of him.  “I don’t think they’re breathing--”

            “Howie.”  Bucky grabbed him by his shoulders.  “You need to get Harrison to safety. I’m gonna take care of all this.  But it’s not important right now. Do you understand?”

            Howie nodded as he scooped Harrison up in his arms.  “Pop’s room?”

            “Yes.  If you run into any trouble, scream.  I’ll be right there,” Bucky said as he put his weapon back in the holster.

            Howie gave him one last look before he nodded and went up the steps with his brother.  

            Bucky walked over to the body on the ground.  He was looking to see if they’d found anything.  Nothing. Not one thing of importance was found on the body.  There was also no identification. That bit wasn’t quite surprising.

            Bucky decided to start searching the rest of the house.  The home was pretty large, so it did take some time to search through everything, but it only appeared to be those two intruders.  They must not have realized who Bucky was or what he was doing there. The enemy really misjudged this situation.

            Bucky went back up to the second floor and entered the bathroom where he had stowed the other intruder.  He pulled the mask over their head. It wasn’t anyone he recognized. It was some man that was probably a mercenary hired for this job.  He did manage to find the device that was interfering with the power. The lights switched back on and Bucky immediately pulled his phone out and called the situation in.  As much as he wanted to keep his mission between him and Clint, they were going to need resources to ID these guys.

            He left the bathroom for a moment and made his way up to the third floor.  He walked over to the master and knocked three times on the door. He heard furniture scraping against the floor before it opened.  

            Steve’s piercing blue eyes were the first thing to greet him.  He opened the door wider and his face was filled with relief as he saw Bucky.  He wasn’t expecting that.

            Steve pulled Bucky into the bedroom and pulled him into a bone crushing hug.  “They’re all okay. You made sure they were safe--”

            Bucky patted his back awkwardly, Steve was still holding onto him tightly.  “Yeah, they’re all all right. I told you, maintaining the safety of your family is my number one priority.  I’m glad that I was able to keep everyone safe. You might have to cancel your dinner plans. I had to call this in, and I don’t know how long all this is gonna take.  It’s probably best if you all stay here for now. I have one of the intruders in the bathroom downstairs and the other one needs a body bag on the first floor.” Bucky hushed his voice for the last part.  The kids didn’t need anything else to worry about.

            Steve nodded.  “Yeah, yeah. I’ll keep them here.  We’ll call Riley to reschedule. I can’t thank you enough.”

            “I’m just doing my job,” Bucky said with a small smile.  He looked over to the kids who were all huddled up together on Steve’s bed.  “Are you all alright? Do you need anything? If anyone is hurt please tell me now, so that I can get help if we need.”

            No one spoke up.  Howie still looked shaken up and it was only to be expected.  The poor kid had to defend his kid brother and watch someone get killed.  It was enough to shake anyone up, nevermind a high schooler.

            Bucky turned back to Steve.  “I don’t know if Howie told you what happened--”

            “Yeah,” Steve exhaled.  “Yeah, he mentioned it.”

            “How many firearms do you have in the home?” Bucky asked.

            Steve’s face fell.  “Just the one. I thought Tony took it with him before--” He stopped and took a deep breath.  “I didn’t think it was still in the house.”

            “And you didn’t think to double check?” Bucky asked.

            Steve gave him an exasperated look.  “With everything that’s been going on, it slipped my mind.  It’s real easy to judge when it’s not your life in shambles.”

            “I’m not judging,” Bucky said honestly.  “I’m just not sure whether or not you’re being honest with me.  It’s gonna be a lot harder for me to keep everyone safe if you’re not upfront about everything with me.”

            Steve opened his mouth only to shut it.  He was clearly holding his tongue. “Sergeant, with all due respect, I think you’re out of line.  I forgot. Simple as that. Believe me, the last thing that I wanted was for Howie to have to go through what he did tonight.  I thought that gun was lost with Tony. That’s it.”

            Bucky nodded.  “I didn’t mean to offend.  I just want to be able to do my job, and it’s hard when I can’t trust my asset.”

            Steve opened his mouth and stopped again.  “I hear you loud and clear, Sergeant. It won’t happen again.”

            Bucky frowned.  “Listen, I’ve got to go keep an eye on the guy in the bathroom.  I’ve got my phone on me. If you need anything please do not hesitate to call.”

            “I’ll call if anything comes up,” Steve said as he looked back to his kids on the bed.  Little Jamie was in Maria’s lap, while the twins were on either side of Howie, who was still holding on to Harrison.  

            Bucky sighed as he headed out of the room.  “I’m really glad you’re all okay.”

            Steve’s face softened at that.  “We’re really grateful for your help.”

            Bucky closed the door behind him as he raced back to the second floor bathroom.  The intruder was just coming to. Bucky wasn’t planning on doing an entire interrogation with him in the bathroom.  Still it couldn’t hurt to ask some questions before the agency took over.

            The man blinked twice and Bucky leaned against the sink with his arms crossed.  “Good morning, sunshine.”

            The man just glared at him.  Bucky wasn’t exactly expecting a response.

            “Spoiler alert.  You and your partner didn’t find JARVIS, or get any of the kids for ransom.  Now I’d bring your partner in here to confirm, but unfortunately his pulse stopped.  So here we are,” Bucky said smugly.

            No response.

            “Be nice to have a name to go with that black eye of yours,” Bucky said, just lowballing him a bit.

            Nothing.

            Bucky sighed as he stood up and turned the cold water on full blast on the shower.  He turned it off after two minutes.

            “Who are you working for?”

            He chuckled.  The man actually had the audacity to laugh.  “Cut off one head, two more shall take its place.”   _Shit_.  Not them.  Anyone but them.

            The son of a bitch laughed as he bit some cyanide that was hidden in his tooth, and before Bucky could even react it was being ingested.  “Hail Hydra.”

            “Shit!” Bucky said loudly as the man convulsed in the tub until he ultimately stopped moving and breathing.

            Bucky dialed Clint almost immediately.  He picked up on the first ring. “What’s wrong?”

            “We had some excitement here.  Break in, two intruders.”

            “Everyone all right?” Barton asked.

            “The family’s fine.  The intruders on the other hand--”

            “In front of the kids?”

            “I didn’t exactly plan it, Barton,” he said as he ran his hand through his hair.  “Anyway, one lived long enough for me to try to interrogate and… he’s Hydra.”

            “ _Shit_!” Barton said.

            Bucky took a deep breath.  “The daughter’s doing fine?”

            “Yeah, no excitement on our end,” Clint answered.  “I’ll be on high alert. This kid isn’t leaving my sight, Barnes.”

            Bucky let out a deep breath.  “If anything, and I mean anything out of the ordinary happens, I want to hear about it.  You and I are going to need much more detailed briefs from now on. We can’t mess around with this.”

            “Copy that, Sarge,” Clint said.

            “You’ll be hearing from me again soon,” Bucky said as he hung up the phone.  He glared back at the corpse in the bathtub. _Hydra_.  Of all the enemies to be up against, Hydra was not one that he was considering.  They were a very serious threat credited with terrorist attacks across the past several decades.  That said there was never anyway to find any information on them or their operations. They didn’t seem to have a digital existence yet they were still finding a way to recruit to their cause.  It was mind blowing.

           Bucky’s phone buzzed.  The unit was here. Bucky headed out to the front lawn to meet them.  

            “Barnes,” he heard one of the agents greet him.  Agent Rumlow. Bucky could recognize that voice anywhere.  He wasn’t Bucky’s favorite colleague, but he was a good agent.

            “Rumlow,” Bucky shook his hand.  “Thanks for coming out here. Unfortunately, I think it’s all for nothing.  I’ve got two corpses.”

            “I thought it was one,” Rumlow said.

            Bucky frowned.  “Cyanide.”

            “Hydra?”

            “It’s not that far a leap,” Bucky said.

            “We’ll clean this place up in a jiff.  You might want to have the family relocate for the night.  This way we can make sure that they don’t have to worry about the clean up or seeing any dead people.” Rumlow crossed his arms.

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah I’ll go talk it over with them now.”

            Rumlow shook his head.  “We’ll go cover up the bodies so they can leave it all to their imagination.”

            “Thank you,” Bucky said genuinely.  “The last thing I need is for these kids to be even more freaked out right now.”

            He headed back up the steps to the bedroom.  He opened the door to see the kids still on the bed while Steve was pacing back and forth.

            “Hey,” Bucky said quietly. “Is there any place you guys can stay for tonight?  The guys are going to clean everything up and try and figure out how they got in and everything, but you can’t stay here.  I’d suggest a safe house, but I know how you feel about that.”

            Steve shot him a look but didn’t argue.  “I’ll call Sam. They’ve been offering to let us stay there since we got the news about--”

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah, okay. Call.  I’ll take you all over there--”

            “You’re not going to stay here?” Steve asked, his eyebrow raised.  “I thought that you wanted to make sure this investigation went right.”

            Bucky frowned. “Well A. That’s not my job, and B.There’s not much to discuss.  The other intruder succumbed to his injuries. This is just a clean up. I’d much rather focus my efforts on making sure you’re all safe.”

            “I see,” Steve said as he sat at the foot of the bed.  Not a moment after he sat down, he shot upright again. “Sarah!  What if someone came after Sarah--”

            “No, no,” Bucky shushed him.  “I’ve already checked in with my contact and she’s fine.  Feel free to call her and check, but she’s fine.”

            “Thank god,” Steve said as he put his head in his hands.  “I can’t-- I can’t lose…”

            Bucky looked over at the kids who were watching on.  They were taking their cues from Steve. If he got too upset, there was no saying how the kids would react.

            “Steve, it’s all fine,” Bucky said as he walked over to him.  “I promise. You’re all fine. Your kids are all great. No one was hurt.”

            Steve sat back down and Bucky followed suit.  “We’re all okay,” Steve repeated as he took a deep breath.  He cleared his throat as he pulled out his phone. “Excuse me.”  

            Steve pressed Sam’s contact and they all watched on.  “Sam? Hey, it’s Steve.” There was a pause. “Yeah, we’re all fine.  We just need some place to crash for the night.” Steve’s face actually cracked into a smile.  “Thanks, Sam. Tell Riley we really appreciate it. We’ll be over soon. The sergeant will be with us too.”  Another pause. “Yeah, we’ll make it work. I’ve currently got all six of them in my bed right now. . . Great, I’ll see you soon.  Thanks again.”

            Steve hung up the phone.  He turned to face his kids.  “We’re going to sleep over at Uncle Sam and Uncle Riley’s house!  It’s gonna be fun!”

            The kids seemed much less excited than when they found out that their uncles would be coming over for dinner.  He didn’t blame them. It had certainly been an eventful evening.

            “Papa,” Harrison whined.  “I’m so hungry and tired, Papa.  Can’t we just stay here?”

            Steve frowned.  “I promise we can stop and pick something up on the way.  I know it’s not as good as Uncle Riley’s cooking, but they’re letting us stay with them, we can’t ask for too much.”

            “Why can’t we stay here?  Is it not safe anymore?” Maria asked.

            Bucky shook his head.  “It’s perfectly safe. We just want to make sure that it stays that way.”

            Steve nodded.  “We’ll be back before you know it.”

            “It shouldn’t be for more than a day or two,” Bucky added.  “Honestly, it’s just to make sure that I didn’t miss anything.”

            Howie cleared his throat.  “Do we know anything about who they are and what they wanted?”

            Bucky shrugged.  “No idea who they are or who they work for, but they were probably after JARVIS.”

            Howie shook his head.  “But… why? Why would they… they were after Harrison, they…”

            “It doesn’t matter, Howie,” Steve said softly.  “You’re both okay. That’s all that matters.”

            Howie’s face distorted.  “No. No. I saw someone… someone was trying to hurt us.  All this over some stupid computer program. Haven’t we lost enough over this?”

            Steve gaped at him for a moment.  “Howie--”

            “No! Dad is dead!  He just died and now there are two dead bodies in our house!  This isn’t normal. This isn’t ‘alright!’ This is fucked up--”

“Language!  Howie, your siblings… you know how I feel about you using that type of language around them.”

            “I don’t fucking care!” Howie yelled and Harrison covered his ears again.  “I want this to be over. I don’t want to lose another person over this stupid JARVIS program!  Dad must have told you something-- _anything_ about where to find it!  Just tell them!”

            Steve’s eyes were wide and it was clear that he was surprised by this accusation.  “Howie, I need you to calm down!” Steve was yelling now. “I have no idea where the tech is!  I don’t want to be in this situation anymore than you do! My _husband_ is gone--”

            “Well that’s our _father_ , unless you’ve forgotten!” Howie snapped back.

            “All right, enough!” Bucky interjected.  “I’m sorry, I don’t want to insert myself into this, believe me, I don’t, but we can’t be doing this right now.  We need to move! You can finish this conversation later, but right now, I’ve got to get you guys out of here so the team out there can do their job.”

            Steve nodded.  “Fine, let’s move out.”

            Talia frowned.  “What about our overnight bags?”

            “I actually took care of that,” Bucky said quietly.  “I was worried something like this might happen, so I set up emergency evacuation kits for all of you.  They’re in the back of the SUV.”

            Steve gave him a look but didn’t say anything to him.  He turned back to his kids. “You heard Sergeant Barnes.  Let’s get going. The sooner we get to Uncle Sam’s, the sooner you can all get to sleep.”

            They all filed out of the bed and headed down the steps.  Steve was holding Jamie, and Howie was holding Harrison’s hand, while Maria held the twins’ hands.  Bucky was following close behind them.

            Steve and the kids filed into the SUV, while Bucky got into this government issued sedan.  He was going to follow them to the home. This way he could see if they were being followed.  Overall the ride there was uneventful. Steve had stopped to get the kids fast food before they had actually gotten to the house.  Still, it didn’t look as though they were being followed.

            Bucky got out of the car and began looking over the home.  He’d already vetted Sam and Riley, but he hadn’t looked into their neighbors.  That said, no one seemed to be paying them much mind. This would serve them well for a night or two.

            He walked over to the door behind the family and waited almost ten seconds before Riley opened the door with an enormous smile.  “Come on in everyone. I made some dessert and hot cocoa. Uncle Sam is just getting the rooms ready.”

            They all filed into the house and Bucky began looking around for potential hazards.  It just looked like a typical home, not that he was expecting much else. The thing that he did find interesting was that it was already child-proof, despite Sam and Riley not having any children of their own.  Maybe the Stark-Rogers children used to come over more frequently.

            It was remarkable how the kids just lit up in this house.  Even Jamie was laughing and giggling as Riley scooped him up in his arms.  Howie looked to be easing up a little bit as he sat down at the table.

            To Bucky’s surprise it was little Talia that seemed to be having the hardest time with the whole thing.  She was the only one not lightening up and smiling. She didn’t even eat a cookie.

            “I want to go home,” she said quietly.  “I want to go sleep in my bed and… I miss Daddy.”

            Riley snapped into action.  He handed Jamie over to Howie and knelt down next to Talia’s chair.  “I know, princess. I know this whole thing stinks something awful. I heard that you were super brave today, just like your dad was.  I’m sure he’s real proud. We just need to make sure that you all stay safe. That’s why you’re all here for a few days. We just wanted to make sure that everyone stays safe.  Besides, my cookies taste better than your Pa’s.”

            Steve smiled gratefully at Riley as he squatted down on the other side of Talia.  “We all miss your Dad. I think he was looking over all of us tonight. Look we’re all safe and sound.”

            The noise of someone clearing their throat, brought their attention over to the kitchen.  Sam was standing there with his arms crossed. “You all need to stop giving me a heart attack.”

            Harrison’s face lit up as he raced over to Sam with his arms out. “Uncle Sam!”

            “Ahh,” Sam made a noise as he waved his arms around before picking up the little boy and throwing him in the air.  “Have you grown since I saw you the other day? I think you’ve gotten even bigger.”

            The little boy giggled as Sam put him back on the ground.  “How’s the rest of the Motley Crew?”

            “A little shaken up,” Riley said as he stood back up and walked over to his husband.  “The rooms are ready?”

            Sam nodded.  “It’s gonna be a little snug, but we’ll make it work.”

            “Thank you, guys, so much,” Steve said, motioning to the two.  “We really appreciate everything.”

            Riley waved dismissively.  “Please, it’s nothing. It’s our pleasure.  I was just telling Sam how much I missed having you all around.”

            Sam nodded.  “It’s true. He feels his ‘culinary gifts’ are wasted by cooking for two.”

            Riley smiled sweetly at him.  “My cookin’ is meant to be enjoyed by the masses, not the few.”

            Sam shook his head at him but his smile didn’t fade.  Bucky couldn’t say that he’d ever been in love, but he imagined that it must have looked something like that.  Steve, on the other hand, looked nauseous at the sight before them.

            Steve clapped his hands.  “All right, let’s start getting ready for bed!”

            Maria, AJ, and Harrison immediately got up and walked over to the steps.  Talia stayed seated as did Howie who was still holding Jamie. “Talia, come on.  I think a good night’s sleep will do you some good.”

            She didn’t say anything.  She just slumped out of her chair and followed behind them.

            “I’ll be up in a minute,” Howie said.  “I just need a minute.”

            Steve nodded as he followed the other kids up the steps.  

            Howie exhaled as he clutched Jamie closer to him.  “I can’t believe--”

            “I know, kiddo,” Riley said as he sat down in the chair next to him.  “I heard you saw some stuff.”

            “I’m going to go make sure the windows and doors are secured,” Bucky said, excusing himself.

            He began looking throughout the house.  It looked as though the Wilsons had their own security system in place.  It seemed to be a functional one. That said, he wasn’t going to be taking any chances.  He’d left the bulk of his equipment at the house, but he had his emergency kit with him. He set up a few bluetooth cameras at most of the windows downstairs and the ones by the bedrooms upstairs.  

            There were two entrances to the home a front and back door.  He set up a few cameras around the doors to capture multiple angles.  He wasn’t planning on getting any sleep tonight. He needed to make sure that this family was all right.  He wasn’t going to fail them again.

            After he finished setting up the cameras, he made his way back over to the open dining/living room area.  Riley was still there, but Sam, Howie, and Jamie were nowhere to be found.

            “Hey, we’re a little tight on space, but I have a blow up bed.  I was gonna set it up in the same room as Steve, Harrison and the baby, but I wasn’t sure where you felt more comfortable.”  Riley smiled warmly at him.

            Bucky gave him an awkward smile.  “I’ll be fine on the couch. I’ll probably be checking the perimeter throughout the night.  I don’t want to wake anyone.”

            Riley nodded.  “Of course. I’ll get you some pillows and blanket--”

            “That won’t be necessary,” Bucky said honestly.

            Riley paused before he looked down and laughed.  “Can I get you anything? We have tons of food. Coffee?  Tea? Hot Cocoa?”

            “I appreciate it, but that really won’t be necessary,” Bucky said politely.  “I’m on duty.”

            “Well,” Riley said slowly.  “Aren’t you _always_ on duty?”

            “That’s the job,” Bucky affirmed.

            Riley laughed uncomfortably again.  “Well, you just kept my friend and his beautiful kids alive tonight.  The least I can do is make you a cup of coffee.”

            Bucky smiled tightly.  “Really, I’m all right.”

            Riley frowned, but didn’t push it. “I’ll let you get comfortable, the bathroom is down the hall, first door on the left.  If you need anything, Sam and I are upstairs and the last door all the way at the end of the hall. Don’t hesitate to ask for anything.”

            “Thank you,” Bucky said appreciatively.  He wasn’t planning on asking Riley or Sam for anything but he appreciated the gesture.  It was sweet. He could see how much they cared for the family.

            Riley nodded as he headed up the steps with a tight smile.  Bucky took out his tablet and began monitoring all the cameras that he set up earlier.  Everything looked pretty normal. Even the kids seemed to be keeping to the rooms that Sam had set up for them earlier.  The worst thing about stakeouts was that they were incredibly boring, and he was insanely tired. He felt his eyelids becoming heavy.  The couch was so comfortable and he felt himself sinking deeper and deeper into the cushion. A quick nap wouldn’t hurt. He wouldn’t be much good to the family if he was sleep-deprived.  He put the tablet away and rested his eyes.

            He woke up when he felt something warm up against his skin.  He opened his eyes to see that he had a blanket on him, and a pillow was beside him.  He sat up and saw a plate of cookies on the coffee table for him. He looked over to the kitchen to see Riley sitting at the dining room table.

            “I didn’t mean to wake you,” Riley said with a small smile.

            Bucky sat up, shaking his head.  “It’s better that I’m up anyway. I should be monitoring everything.”

            “You’re one of four vets here.  We can take it in shifts,” Riley said.  “Besides, your energy will probably be best spent when the little monsters are conscious.”

            Bucky shrugged at that.  “I don’t know, they’re not so bad.  I mean, I can’t even really complain about this assignment.  It’s mostly just keeping look-out.”

            “Not tonight it wasn’t,” Riley said as he crossed his arms.

            “No,” he agreed.  “It was not.” Bucky pulled up his tablet and took a look at the feed from the cameras.  Everything looked to be okay. He wasn’t too worried, though. Riley was right. There were four trained veterans here.  It was hard to imagine they’d be safer anywhere else.

            “What are you doing up?” Bucky asked as he looked at the time.  It was nearly four in the morning.

            Riley smiled at that.  “I have trouble sleepin’ sometimes.  I’m sure you know what that’s like.”

            “You can say that again.  I looked into you. You’re lucky.  From what I read, it was touch and go for a little while,” Bucky said.  He wasn’t really sure why he was talking to Riley, but once he started, he couldn’t really stop.

            “It wasn’t exactly a walk in the park, but I’m here.  Honestly, I don’t remember much of it. It was harder on Sammy, really,” Riley said as he leaned back in his chair.

            “It’s just the two of you?” Bucky asked, mostly out of curiosity.  “I mean you can tell me to fuck off, but you two are great with those kids.  I’m surprised you don’t have any.”

            Riley full on grinned at that.  “First off, I’d never use that kind of talk with kids in the house.  Second, I don’t know. I mean we talked about it, but my family’s complicated and Sam’s… Sam.  I could probably ask him to adopt a mountain lion and he’d say yes. I guess it’s the timing. What about you?  You know all this stuff about us, but I feel like you’re practically a stranger. I mean for Christ's sake, I don’t even know your first name.”

            “Technically it’s James, but only my sisters call me that.  I go by Bucky. In basic there was another James, my middle name is Buchanan, and the nickname just kind of stuck.” He rubbed his forehead.

            Riley laughed at that.  “Wasn’t expecting that. I thought you were gonna say ‘John’ and leave it at that.”

            Bucky raised his eyebrows momentarily as he went to move the toasty blanket.  “How is this so warm?”

            Riley smiled.  “I put it in the dryer.  I know it gets cold down here at night.”

            “You really don’t have to do all this,” Bucky said.  “I’m fine with just the couch.”

            Riley gave him a look.  “You were shivering and you were practically ice cold.  Besides, I don’t mind. I like having the company here and you’ve done a lot for our friend and his family.  The least I could do is make sure you had a warm blanket and some snacks in case you got hungry.”

            “Just doing my job,” Bucky said honestly.

            “I’d say it’s more than that,” Riley said.  “I mean, from what I hear, you’re monitoring their every move.  Most other people would treat this like a low level babysitting job.  Lord only knows what could have happened tonight if you weren’t there.”

            Bucky waved dismissively at that.  “Who knows? Maybe if it was someone else they would have found the tech and then the whole family would be out of danger right now.”

            Riley shrugged.  “I doubt that. Tony was nothing if not diligent.  If he didn’t want anyone to find that, no one’s gonna find it.  They didn’t call him a genius for nothing.”

            “Maybe. Or maybe I’m missing something and they’re in danger because _I’m_ not being diligent enough,” Bucky said, mostly to himself.

            “You’re human.  Besides, no one else seems to be able to find it so I don’t really think you can fault yourself here.” Riley took a sip out of his mug.  “I know Steve can be a lot, and I’m sure that doesn’t help much, but what matters is you’re keeping them alive. Believe me, we’re all grateful for that.”

            Bucky made a face.  “I get the feeling that they’d much prefer it if I wasn’t around.”

            Riley’s jaw went slack.  “It’s not like that. They’re in mourning.  Tony _just_ died.  The kids are trying to make sense of it and Steve… Steve’s just trying to go on.  He and Tony were…”

            “Don’t say soulmates.  Believe me, I don’t envy them and I know they’re going through hell.  I’m sure it doesn’t help having me around. I’m just trying to keep them safe and I can’t do that if they won’t trust me,” Bucky said candidly.

            Riley laughed.  “Try seeing it from their eyes.  Their loved one just died, and now they have a complete stranger in their home, and you’re not exactly warm and fuzzy.  I mean you _just_ told me your first name.  You could extend that courtesy to them.  If you want them to trust you, you’ve gotta give them something.  Otherwise you’re just GI Joe #6. Besides, I’m sure after tonight, they’ll be a little more trusting.”

            “Maybe.”

            Riley looked over to the clock.  “I better get back up there. If I hang out down here too long, Sam thinks I’m cooking and it turns into this big thing.  I set up the coffee pot, if you want any. You just gotta turn the thing on.”

            “Thanks, but--”

            “I know, I know.  Just in case,” Riley said as he stood up and made his way up the steps.  “Try and get some shut eye!” He called back to him.

 

 


	6. Chapter 5

            Riley wasn’t wrong.  The kids had run down the steps that morning as if it were Christmas day.  There was excitement and it was clear that this was their happy place. Even Jamie seemed happier here.  The room was practically buzzing with happiness.

            Riley had been cooking breakfast since the crack of dawn, and the kids couldn’t get enough of it.  AJ alone had eaten some french toast, pancakes, and waffles. The kid was going to have one hell of a stomach ache later.  However, the kids were electric, even Talia and Howie seemed happier too. It was like Riley and Sam were a cure for sadness.  Everyone seemed brighter, except for Steve.

            Steve still seemed like he’d rather be anywhere else.  He barely touched any of the food, which was unheard of from what Bucky had seen.  Riley and Sam didn’t comment on it, even though Bucky could see them watching Steve like a hawk.

            “Have you spoken to Sarah lately?” Riley asked as he finally sat down to have some breakfast.

            Steve nodded.  “I called her this morning.  I didn’t want her to hear about the break in from her brothers or sisters.  I wanted to check in and let her know what was going on.”

            “She’s fine right?  Nothing happened on her end,” Howie asked, his mouth stuffed full of an omelette.

            “Yes,” Steve said nodding.  “Sarah is perfectly fine. Nothing but studying for her last night.  We didn’t talk for too long though, she’s got midterms coming up soon.”

            “I miss Sarah.” Talia pouted.  “When is she coming home?”

            Steve smiled sadly.  “She’ll be home for Thanksgiving.  You’ll see her in a few weeks.”

            “Fine,” Talia groaned as she played with her food.

            “How is she in general?” Sam asked.  “I know she and Tony were pretty close.  This must be difficult for her.”

            Steve sighed.  “Yeah, well, she hasn’t really talked about that… like at all.  Everytime I try and bring it up, she shuts me down. I guess she must be taking it pretty hard.”

            This was all different from the reports that Bucky was getting from Clint.  Barton made it sound as though Sarah was the most well adjusted person on the planet at the moment.  Maybe this was how she was coping, by throwing herself into school. Still, it didn’t explain why she was keeping Steve at arms length.

            Riley took a deep breath and shook his head. “Poor kid.  I can’t imagine what you’re all going through.”

            Steve raised his eyebrows.  “Well, I hope you’ll never have to find out.”

            “I didn’t mean--” Riley began.

            “No, no,” Steve said.  “I’m sorry. I didn’t--I just never know what to say.”

            Bucky frowned as he looked on trying not to intrude on the family moment.  Maybe he’d been too hard on Steve. Maybe seeing all this lovey-dovey crap that Sam and Riley had going on just reminded him of what was taken from him.  Maybe he could consider bringing up family grief counseling. The kids certainly weren’t processing anything. He wasn’t even sure how to bring up that conversation.

            “ _Bucky_ , feel free to help yourself to some breakfast,” Riley called over to him with a shiteating grin.

            “What did you just call him?” Maria laughed.

            Riley laughed back teasingly.  “Hmm?”

            Sam shoved Riley playfully.  “C’mon, what are you playing at?”

            “Everyone’s got a first name,” Riley said, still grinning.  “I’m just the first one to ask.”

            “His first name is James,” Steve said almost immediately.  “I’ve read his file.” Bucky wasn’t sure what the hell to think about that.

            “He doesn’t go by James, though,” Riley said, taking a bite of his pancake.  “That’s reserved for his sisters.”

            “You have sisters?” Howie asked.  “I’m so sorry.”

            “Shut up.” Maria shoved him not so playfully.

            “I’ve got three of them,” Bucky said, not expecting to go into his family history.

            “Me too,” AJ said with his head in his hands.

            “Can we rewind to when Uncle Riley called you ‘Bucky’?” Howie asked with a smile.

            Riley turned over to him, still smiling.  “You wanna tell them or should I?”

            “It’s a nickname,” Bucky said.  “My middle name is Buchanan, and let’s just say ‘Bucky’ stuck.”

            “Do we still call you Segea--Sargento--Ser--” Talia was stumbling over her words.  “It’s really hard to say.”

            Bucky smiled at that.  He didn’t think about that.  Maybe the kids were struggling with the pronunciation itself.  “You can call me Bucky, Barnes, Sarge, whatever you guys want. Sorry for not making that clear earlier.  I’m really not picky.”

            “What are your sisters’ names?” Harrison asked.  “Are they coming to Thanksgiving?”

            Bucky shook his head.  “No, I think they’ll be somewhere else for Thanksgiving.  Their names are Rebecca, Abby, and Delia.”

            “Do you miss them?” Harrison asked.  “I miss my biggest sister, Sarah. She goes to school far away.  She gives the best hugs.”

            “I thought I gave the best hugs!” Riley asked with mock anger in his voice.  

            Harrison just laughed at that.  “Uncle Riley’s so silly, Pa,” Harrison said to Steve who smiled fondly at the four-year-old.

            “Yeah, he is pretty silly.” Steve kissed the top of the little boy’s head sweetly.

            “What’s the verdict on breakfast, Sarge?” Riley asked again.  “There’s plenty and I know you didn’t eat anything last night.”

            “I have protein bars in my bag--” Bucky began.

            “No one will eat _protein bars_ under this roof, Sergeant.  House rules.” Riley crossed his arms.  “There’s plenty of food, and you better help yourself to some of it.”

            Bucky smiled tightly.  He wasn’t sure how to feel about this.  He wasn’t supposed to share a meal with them.  He wasn’t family, he was a protector. He didn’t really want to blur the lines, however he also did not want to offend anyone, least of all Steve’s friends.  He settled for eating a piece of toast. Riley didn’t seem thrilled with his selection but he didn’t say anything about it either.

            After a few more moments of eating and casual conversation, the kids began to run off.  Talia grabbed Riley and dragged him up the steps to have him do her hair--apparently he did the best braids, while Sam, Steve and Bucky were left with Jamie.  

            “Any word on who attacked the house last night?” Steve asked him.

            Bucky shook his head.  “No one’s told me anything yet.”  He wasn’t about to tell him about Hydra.  There was no saying who could be involved in this situation.

            Steve frowned at that.  “Any idea when we can head back home?  I want to get these kids back to normal.”

            “I’m just waiting for the all clear,” Bucky said honestly.  “The second I hear anything, I’ll let you know.”

            “Thanks,” Steve said as he picked Jamie up from the high chair and sat him down on the floor with some of the baby toys.  “I don’t want them to be too nervous to return home.”

            Bucky stared at him.  He was almost certain that the kids would be anxious whether they returned in a few days or a few months.  Still, it couldn’t hurt to rip that bandaid off, since a safe house was still out of the question as far as Steve was concerned.  

            “The second I know, you’ll know,” Bucky said truthfully.  In honesty, he could see why Steve would be on edge. His home had just been attacked and he had to care for six traumatized children.  Overall, Steve was handling it much better than most. He just wished the man would consider a safe house. It would be a much more secure situation than the one that they were currently in.  Still, children were different-- they complicated the situation.

            They only wound up being there for two hours longer before Bucky received the all clear from Rumlow.  Steve was relieved to hear the news, the kids on the other hand were far less enthusiastic than their father.

            “I want to stay with Uncle Sam and Uncle Riley,” Talia whined.  “They’re so much fun!”

            AJ nodded.  “Uncle Sam is the best with GI Joe, he does awesome voices!”

            “Can we please just stay a little longer?” Maria pouted.  “We’re all having such a good time, and we miss them. We haven’t seen Uncle Sam and Uncle Riley in a while.”

            Steve crossed his arms, and it was amusing to see someone as massive as him trying to reason with a child.  “We saw them last week.”

            “Only for pick ups and drop offs,” Howie pointed out.  “It’s not like we got to actually spend time with them like this.”

            Steve remained in the same position, his eyes darted over to his eldest son.  “We’ll have them over later in the week to return the favor, but we’re leaving.  I want to make sure that the house is okay.”

            Harrison crossed his arms, mirroring Steve, but instead, he plopped right down on the floor.  “I want to play! We don’t play at home anymore!”

            “Now, now,” Riley interjected.  “There’s no need for the theatrics!  You heard your Pa, your uncle and I will be over later in the week.  We can play all you want, but if this is how you’re gonna act everytime we say goodbye, we may not be able to do this that often.  I need you to be brave so that you don’t make me feel sad.”

            That worked on the older ones.  Talia, who had previously had tears forming in her eyes prior to Riley’s speech, was now just staring at them as if nothing had happened.  The other kids had seemed to relax too, except for Harrison. Harrison had big crocodile tears beginning to fall from his eyes and Bucky had to admit he felt his own heart pang.

            “I do--don’t wan--want to go h--home,” he hiccuped.

            “Harrison,” Steve said warningly.  “I do not tolerate temper tantrums.”

            The four-year-old did not seem to care.  He just kept crying and the room became more tense.  It was clear that Riley did not want to get involved in this situation, but would rather let Steve take the wheel.  Sam was just watching on from the corner of the room not moving.

            “I am going to count to three,” Steve said warningly.  

            The shrieking just continued.

            “One.”

            Harrison didn’t seem to care.  He threw his head back against the floor and started kicking his legs out and hitting the floor with his hands.  He somehow managed to get even louder, which Bucky didn’t even think was possible.

            “Two.”  Steve didn’t even flinch.  He remained unmoving as he watched the little boy have a fit in front of him.

            The screams changed into more a sob than anything else.  It was definitely more… desperate than before.

            “Two and a half,” Steve said with deadly calm in his voice.

            It stopped.  Harrison just stopped.  He was looking down and was clearly still upset, but there was no more yelling or stomping.  It all stopped.

            “Apologize to Uncle Sam and Uncle Riley for making a scene.  They may not want to invite us over anymore if this is how you react when it’s time to leave,” Steve said sternly.

            The little one stood up from the floor and walked over to Sam and Riley with his head hung.  “I’m… sorry.” He sniffled.

            “It’s all right, sweetie,” Riley said with a sad smile.

            “Yeah, we’re sad you have to go too,” Sam said as he ruffled the kids hair playfully.

            Harrison wiped his eyes and clung to Sam in a tight hug.  

            “Go get your stuff together,” Steve said to all the children, but he was watching Harrison closely.

            The other kids quickly made themselves scarce, while Harrison very slowly let go of Sam and walked up the steps.  Steve watched with a stern, calm look in his eyes as the kids left the room. Once they were out of sight, his demeanor crumbled and his put his head in his hands.

            “Fuck,” he hissed.  “I have no idea how to do this without him!”

            “You’re doing great,” Sam said as he left Riley’s side to go pat Steve on the back.

            “I mean you were able to hold your ground even with those big blue eyes staring up at you!  I’d never be able to do that,” Riley said as he leaned up against the countertop.

            Steve shook his head, clearly agitated.  “No. Tony used to get them to listen with a smile on his face and they would just do whatever he asked.”

            “That’s not what he said.”  Bucky didn’t even know what had possessed him to speak up in the first place.  He just knew that before he could stop himself the words were flowing out of his mouth.

            “What?” Steve asked.  He wasn’t angry or upset, he just sounded surprised.

            “He talked about you,” Bucky said honestly.  “He said he didn’t know if he’d be able to keep his cool without flying off the handle if you weren’t so good with them.  He said that you were ‘the baby whisperer’ or something.”

            Riley smiled softly at that.  “He used to call you that all the time, Steve.”

            Steve didn’t seem to hear him, he was just gaping at Bucky as if he were still processing what he’d said.  “Why did he talk about us?”

            Bucky shrugged.  “You were practically _all_ he talked about.  He was really looking forward to getting home to you.”

            Steve’s eyes sunk.  He looked as though Bucky had just kicked his puppy.  He really wasn’t trying to upset Steve. He was just being honest.  Stark never shut up about them.

            “We really couldn’t wait for him to come home either,” Steve said. His voice was defeated.

            “I didn’t mean--” Bucky began

            Steve straightened up and began making his way towards the steps.  “No, I know. It’s just--my kids were in danger too now and--”

            “The safe house is on standby--”

            “No!” Steve’s voice cracked through the air.  “We’re not going to a fucking safe house. Tony died heading to one of those spots!  Clearly, they’re not all that safe!”

            Bucky tried his best to keep his face neutral.  This argument was getting old. “Your house obviously isn’t the safest option either.”

            “We’re all still breathing, which is more than can be said for my husband,” Steve shot back.

            “Because I’m good at what I do,” Bucky said as he crossed his arms.  “I don’t mind this arrangement, but you need to understand that there are safer options available.  I don’t want anyone else to get hurt.”

            Steve turned back to look at him.   “I’m only going to say this one more time.” His voice got venomously quiet.  “My kids. Are not. Going. To. A. _Fucking._ Safe house.”

            Bucky put his hands up defensively.  “I hear you, but these people are likely coming back, and this time they’ll be more prepared.  It just might be a little difficult to maintain this normal life you want for them.”

            “We’re not leaving the house,” Steve said through gritted teeth.

            “It doesn’t have to be a safe house, it could be a place that you pick--”

            “Am I speaking Greek?” Steve spat.  “I’m not leaving my house, where my kids have spent their entire lives and that my husband built with his own two hands.  I will _not_ let _terrorists_ drive us from there.  They’ve taken enough. They don’t get my house.”

            “Okay,” Bucky said slowly.  “We stay, but things are going to be different.  We were unprepared this time. I don’t want us to be caught off guard again.”

            Steve eyed him carefully, like he was trying to figure Bucky out or something.  It was pretty clear that he still didn’t trust Bucky yet. “How can you be so sure that they’ll be back?”

            Bucky couldn’t fight the exasperated look that he felt come onto his face.  “Because they didn’t find JARVIS yet and neither did we.”

            Steve opened his mouth, presumably to argue, but he shut it again.  “Fine,” he said after a moment. “We’ll go along with whatever you decide.”

            Bucky snorted.  “Forgive me if I don’t exactly hold my breath.  You just need to understand that this is serious.”

            “I know it’s serious,” Steve said shortly.  “My husband is dead, isn’t he?”

            “He’s just trying to be real with you, Steve,” Sam said calmly.  “You guys were lucky this time. Let’s not leave the next time to chance.”

            Steve’s eyes darted to Wilson, but he didn’t respond to his friend. He just made his way back over the steps before ultimately retreating up them.

            Bucky turned back to Sam and Riley.  “I’m sorry. I didn’t intend to--”

            “Stop.”  Riley waved dismissively.  “It wasn’t you.”

            “Riles,” Sam said cautiously.  

            Riley shot him a look.  “Sammy.”

            “Don’t get on Steve right now--”

            “I’m not,” Riley said calmly.  “I’m just saying that it’s not Bucky’s fault.”

            Bucky rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.  “I should have been more professional.”

            “This is life and death,” Riley said.  “You can’t exactly sugarcoat this.”

            Bucky frowned.  Riley wasn’t wrong.  It was still a lot to put on this family at the worst possible time in their lives.  It couldn’t be easy for any of them.

            “We just want them to be safe,” Sam said after a moment.  “We appreciate everything you’ve done for them, but look at what happened to Tony.  You can’t blame them, or us, for having their doubts.”

            “I’d be concerned if you weren’t,” Bucky said honestly.

            Before anyone could say anything else, the kids began barreling down the steps.  Even Harrison came down with his evacuation bag in tow. Bucky made a mental note to replenish those emergency bags when they got back to the house.

            Howie had even packed up all of Jamie’s things as well as his own.  The kid deserved a medal or something. He wondered if that was something that he could arrange.

            AJ went right from the stairs over to Riley and began hanging on his left side.

            “What’s up, slugger?” Riley asked as he pulled the little one close to him.

            “I don’t want to go home,” AJ mumbled into Riley’s shirt.

            “I know, love,” Riley said sadly.  “We’ll see you soon. I’m afraid that if you stayed any longer then I would have spoiled you all beyond repair!”

            “Would that really be so bad?” Howie asked solemnly.  “I think we could all use that right now.”

            Riley looked at him with wide and heartbroken eyes.  “I know you all had to grow up so fast, but trust me, this is for the best.  Your Pops has to make sure that you all grow up to be good people, and too much fun tends to ruin all that.  It doesn’t mean that we can’t have a good time when you’re around. It just doesn’t get to last forever.”

            Talia pouted.  “Too bad we haven’t had any fun since Daddy…”

            Maria shook her head.  “Fun? I don’t know if I’ll ever have that again.  I just want to hug him again. I don’t think anything else will make me happy ever again.”

            “It gets easier, sugar,” Riley said as he motioned for Maria to come over to his other side.  “I promise. Each day is hurts a little less and it becomes more and more like an ache. It’ll always be there, just a little less sharp.”

            Maria buried her face in Riley’s shirt.  She was sobbing quietly, and there was nothing any of them could even do.  Bucky just watched in horror. This was his fault. It was his job to protect Tony and he’d failed.  

            Riley rubbed her back soothingly.  “I know, honey, I know. It hurts something awful.”

            Steve descended down the steps.  “What’s going on?”

            As if on cue, both AJ and Maria retreated away from Riley.  Maria rubbed her eyes furiously trying to wipe away her tears.  “Nothing,” she said quickly.

            Steve looked quizzically at her.  “Maria, what’s going on?”

            She shrugged, not looking her father in the eye.  “Just saying goodbye to Uncle Riley.”

            Steve looked from her over to Riley who gave him an apologetic smile.  

            “Maria,” Steve said, still looking over at Riley.  “What’s wrong?”

            “You know how hard this all is, Steve,” Riley said dismally.  “They miss their dad and… they’re just so young.”

            Steve’s face fell as he nodded.  “Yeah… yeah I know.” He squeezed Maria’s shoulder for a moment but that was it.  He didn’t hug her or share any supportive or encouraging words. “Come on, we’ve got to get going.”

            Maria pushed past him and stormed out of the house.  Bucky didn’t even judge how Steve was handling it. He wouldn’t even begin to know how to talk to a kid about the finality of death and losing a loved one this young, nevermind under the circumstances they were under.

            “Steve--” Sam began.

            “We’ll see you during the week,” Steve said as if Sam hadn’t said anything.  He picked up Jamie and took the bag from Howie, who was leading the other kids out of the house.  “Tuesday good?”

            “Tuesday is perfect,” Riley answered quietly, not looking Steve in the eye.

            Steve nodded as he turned around and began walking out of the house.  Bucky followed him, not daring to look back at Sam and Riley. There was a whole silent conversation that had just taken place, and Bucky didn’t have the first clue how to decipher that.

 

 


	7. Chapter 6

            When they got back to the house, things were instantly different.  Bucky had worked very hard to come up with emergency safety plans, but it was hard to make sure that the kids really understood how important it was that they followed the plans to a T.  He had set up secure hidden compartments in almost each room of the house. It wasn’t particularly difficult; it mostly just required updating the closets.

            He’d installed special locks so that the only way into one of these closets when the house was in lockdown mode was to tap their tracking bracelets against the hidden sensor.  It would notify Bucky who was in which hiding spot. He also upgraded the tracking devices so that they now had a panic button to set the house in lockdown mode on their own and notify Bucky that there was an issue.

            Still, he had to make sure that the kids understood; they had lots of drills.  They were called hide and seek for the younger kids so that they didn’t panic. However, he still couldn’t be too sure how this would all go over if there were other people in the home.  It was still a better system than the way they had winged the first ambush.

            Something else that he had started doing with Barton were daily status reports.  This way there were two sets of eyes looking over the information in case either of them were missing something.  From the sounds of Barton’s reports, things were still pretty much the same for Sarah. Still, they hadn’t had the chance to access her computer yet.  Since the attack at the house, Bucky didn’t think that it was wise to risk leaving Sarah unaccompanied at the time.

            However, since the attack things had been quiet.  It was almost as if nothing had happened. They hadn’t even heard so much as a car alarm since the attack had taken place.  Bucky was worried that they were being lulled into a false sense of security, but he was glad that he didn’t have to test the new protocols just yet.

            Time passed strangely after the intruders.  If it weren’t for the status reports, the days would have all bled together.

            _Status Report:  Two Weeks Post Home Invasion_

_Sergeant was woken up to a knock at the guest bedroom door.  One of the subjects: 4-year-old; was standing outside. Anxious._

Bucky had stared at the young boy, who was standing outside his bedroom door.  “Harrison, is everything okay? Do we need to play hide and seek?”

            The little one shook his head.  He wiped his eyes and was clutching onto his teddy bear tightly.  “I had a bad dream. Papa was sleeping and… you said your job is to keep us safe.”

            Bucky felt relief wash over him.  “Yeah. Yeah, that’s my job. Let me take you back up to your Pop--”

            Harrison shook his head.  “It’s scary up there!”

            “Why?” Bucky asked, confused.

            “The nightlight went out,” Harrison said sadly as he looked down.

            Bucky nodded.  “Why don’t you come in and we’ll put on some cartoons until you feel better?”

            The little boy grinned up at him and gave him a big hug.  Bucky ushered him into the bedroom and he pulled up his laptop and put on Paw Patrol.  He took the opportunity to look over the security cameras to make sure that there was no reason other than nightmares that Harrison might be awake.  There weren’t. Everything was secure.

            _Upon further investigation, it was determined to be a false alarm._

            When Bucky looked back over to the bed, Harrison was passed out on the bed.  Bucky couldn’t help but smile.

            He went over to his desk and began writing this up in the status report for the day.  When he felt his own eyelids become heavy. He glanced back over to the bed. The little boy was fine.  It couldn’t hurt to rest his eyes for a moment.

            He woke up again to frantic knocking at his door.  Bucky got up from his chair at the desk and looked over to the bed.  Harrison was still sound asleep. He opened the door and Steve practically barged in.

            “It’s Harrison!  I can’t find him anywhere!  I don’t know how this could have happened!  You’re tracking him, right? Please, please tell me--” Steve was pacing frantically, his eyes were red and puffy.

            “He’s fine,” Bucky said as he grabbed Steve’s shoulder to get him to calm down.  He motioned over to the bed. “He had a nightmare. I let him stay here and watch some Paw Patrol.”

            Steve’s face flooded with relief.  He practically threw his arms around Bucky as he hugged him tightly.  “Oh, thank god! I was so worried.”

            “It’s fine,” Bucky said honestly.  “He didn’t want to wake you, and he said the nightlight went out.”

           Steve nodded.  “Yeah, we need to go get another one.”  He walked over to the bed and began stroking Harrison’s blonde hair.  “He came right to you?”

            “Well, it’s my job to protect you.  I think he took the message to heart.” Bucky smiled tightly.

            Steve laughed at that.  “I’d say so.” He looked over to Bucky.  “Thank you--for letting him stay here. You could have just sent him back upstairs.”

            Bucky waved dismissively.  “It’s not a big deal. It’s important that they can trust me, and besides, I know that you’ve all had a hard time sleeping since the intrusion.  I thought it best to let you all sleep.”

            “Well, thank you,” Steve repeated.  “I’m just so glad that he’s all right.”

            “I have a question,” Bucky said bravely.  

            Steve looked over to him.  “Yeah?”

            “Why are they all sleeping in your room?” Bucky asked.

            Steve shrugged.  “I think it started because when Tony first… passed, it was the only way we could get to sleep, and I needed to know they were all okay.  Now… I don’t know, I guess it’s just habit.”

            “The only reason I ask is that well you’re all sitting ducks up there,” Bucky said.  “I’m just worried, if someone were to break in. Then--”

            “If we were separated then only _some_ of my children might be in danger?” Steve asked, his brow furrowed.

            Bucky shook his head.  “I’m trying to be real with you, right now.  All it takes is one person to do something to your room and then you’re all neutralized or worse.  Divide and conquer, make it harder to find all of you.”

            Steve took a deep breath.  “I’ll talk to them, but if they want to stay with me, then I won’t push it.”

            “That’s all I’m asking,” Bucky said sincerely.

            Steve nodded.  “I’m gonna wake him up.  He’s got to get ready for school.”

            “Yeah, of course.”  Bucky nodded.

            “Harrison,” Steve said in a singsong voice.  “Time to wake up.”

            The little boy’s eyes cracked open, and his face broke into a grin upon seeing his father. “Morning, Papa.”

            “Morning, baby,” Steve said, smiling back down at him.  

            Harrison was probably the only person on planet earth that would wake up with a smile on their face, it was adorable.  “Mr. Bucky kept me safe here.”

            “I can see that,” Steve said, clearly trying not to laugh.  “Why don’t you say thank you to Sergeant Barnes so I can get you some breakfast and get you ready for school.”

            Harrison crawled out of the bed and walked over to Bucky.  It was adorable; this little four-year-old with bedhead walking over to him with a big smile and hugging him again.  “Thank you, Bucky!”

            “You’re very welcome,” Bucky said as the little boy detached himself from him and raced out the door.

            Steve shook his head.  “That kid is lucky he’s so goddamn cute.”  He stood up from the bed and went to leave.  He looked back for a moment and gave him a small smile.  “Thank you, again.”

            “It was nothing,” Bucky said honestly.

            _Status Report: Three weeks since home invasion.  One-year-old is independently mobile._

            They were in the kitchen.  The kids were working on homework, Bucky was reading over Barton’s status reports, and Steve was in the living room with Jamie.  

            “So see, you have to carry the three.” Howie was trying to help Talia with her math homework.

            Her brow was furrowed.  “But I don’t understand.”

            “Look, see this number here doesn’t just disappear.” Howie was circling something on the paper for her.

            Bucky was tuning them out as he was reading about Sarah’s final exam schedule when he felt something pulling on his pant leg.  He looked down to see Jamie smiling up at him. He had a big smile on his face and he waved up at him.

            “Well this is new,” Bucky said.

            “What?” Howie asked, not taking his eyes off of Talia’s homework sheet.

            “Jamie’s walking on his own now,” Bucky said and couldn’t help but grin as the little one kept tugging at his pant leg.

            “Pa!” Talia called as she looked over at Jamie!  “Papa, you gotta come see this!”  
            Steve jogged into the room and his face lit up.  “I read the paper for two minutes and he decides to walk?”  He was practically pouting. It was actually kind of endearing.

            Jamie must have thought so too because he started laughing hysterically.  “Papa!”

            Steve put his hand on his hips and opened his mouth wide.  He gasped theatrically. “Did you sneak off on me? Did you sneak away from Papa?”  
            The little one laughed even louder as he waved over at Steve and stumbled over towards him.  “Pa, up!”

Steve’s pout broke into a blinding grin.  “Up? But you can get around all by yourself now, little man.”

            Jamie giggled again as he put his hands up, and danced in his spot for a moment.  “Up, Pa!”

            Steve swooped the toddler up in his arms.  “Happy now?”

            Jamie was still laughing as he put his hand on Steve’s face for balance.  “Ya.”

            Steve laughed, he actually laughed.  It was the most musical laugh that Bucky heard in his entire life.  “I can’t believe you started walking when no one was looking. That was so sneaky!”

            “No!” Jamie exclaimed as he shook his head.

            “If you say so,” Steve said playfully as he kissed the boy’s cheek sweetly.  “I’m going to have to keep a very close eye on you, aren’t I?”

            Jamie grinned and started nodding at him.  

            Steve laughed again and Bucky couldn’t help but wish that there was a way to bottle up that sound and keep it forever.  If Steve wasn’t so pigheaded, then Bucky probably would have actually liked the guy.

_Status Report: One Month Since Home Invasion_

_Sergeant has been taking over pickups and drop offs._

Bucky had been getting wary about the kids being at school constantly.  There was just so much of their lives that took place in school and Bucky didn’t know next to anything about it.  He decided one way to become more aware would be to take over pickups and drop offs. This way, he’d at least get more of a glimpse of what was going on when the kids were at school.

            For instance, Bucky noticed when he was dropping AJ off at school that there was this other kid in his class that was giving him a bit of a hard time.

            “AJ--what did your parents name you that so even an idiot like you can spell it?” The little brat spat at him.

            Talia stepped right in so Bucky didn’t have to.  She literally shoved the kid up against the wall with her forearm against the kid’s windpipe.  “Leave my brother alone or next time, you better be prepared to deal with me!”

            “Ms. Stark-Rogers!” One of the teachers called over to her.  “Come here!”

            Talia didn’t budge, though, and Bucky had to admit that he was pretty impressed.  “Do you understand me? My brother is off-limits!”

            The kid stared at her with wide eyes and nodded.

            “Talia!” The teacher snapped.  “I will not ask again!”

            Talia backed away from the kid, who then slid down the wall.  Bucky watched as she followed the teacher into the main office.

            “AJ, you okay?” Bucky asked as he walked over to the twin that was not currently receiving a talking to.

            He nodded.  “I don’t care about that stuff.  I know I’m not stupid. My dad’s Tony Stark.  I used to make stuff with him in his warehouse all the time!  I helped with some of his inventions. I _know_ I’m smart.  Papa just doesn’t want us to skip grades.  He can say whatever he wants. Talia just likes to get involved.”

            “Okay,” Bucky said, not entirely convinced.  “If you change your mind, let me know. I don’t like bullies.”

            AJ just shrugged it off.  “I’d rather it be me than someone who might actually believe him.”  With that the young boy just marched off to class without a second thought.  

            Bucky looked down to Harrison who was unaware of the entire situation and staring down at the tablet that Bucky was letting him play with after good behavior in the car.  “Let’s get you to your classroom so I can take care of your sister, okay?”

            “Okay,” Harrison said as he handed the tablet back to Bucky.  He took Bucky’s hand as they made their way down the hall to Ms. Peggy’s classroom.

            “Good Morning, Harrison,” Carter said cheerily.  “I’m very excited for the day we have planned.”

            Harrison grinned at that.  “Morning, Missus Peggy! Can I show Mr. Bucky the new painting I did yesterday?”

            She shook her head.  “You know the rules. Artwork is only for when we’re finished.  It’s still a work in progress. Mr…” she paused.

            “Barnes,” Bucky said politely.  “I’m a friend of the family.”

            “Right,” she said cautiously.  “I could have sworn you said that you went by James?”

            He nodded.  “Yeah, it’s a nickname that the kids call me--Bucky, that is.  James is the legal name.”

            “Got it,” she said, but Bucky could tell that she wasn’t exactly buying it.  “Yeah, when everything happened with Tony, I decided to come down and lend a hand.”

            “How… thoughtful,” Peggy said, clearly not sure why Bucky was still talking to her.

            “The point that I’m trying to make here is that Steve is going through a lot, and if there’s anything you need relayed to him, I’d be happy to help.”  Bucky smiled tightly.

            “Mr. Bucky kept me safe with Paw Patrol!” Harrison said excitedly.

            “Ah,” she said with a chuckle.  “You work with Chase and his friends, I see?”

            Bucky nodded.  “Who hasn’t at one point or another.  They’re so versatile.”

            “Right you are.”  Peggy smiled. “Come on, Harrison, in you go.  We’ll see Mr. Bucky at dismissal.”

            Harrison gave him a tight hug before smiling up at him.  “See you later, Mr. Bucky!”

            Bucky waved as he watched him enter the classroom.

            Peggy turned back to look at him.  “For the record, I think it’s great what you’re doing.  You’re practically all Harrison talks about these days. It takes a village.”

            Bucky nodded.  “I’m just doing what I can.  I meant what I said, though, if you need anything, let me know.  Steve’s got a ton on his plate.”

            “I’ll keep that in mind,” she said politely as she followed Harrison into the classroom.

            Bucky took his phone out and began dialing Steve.

            “Is everything okay?” Steve picked up on the first ring.

            “Um… yes in the sense that they’re all safe.  You may be receiving a call from the principal,” Bucky said as he made his way over to the principal’s office.

            He heard Steve sigh on the other end of the phone.  “What? Which principal? Which kid?”

            “AJ has a bully and I guess Talia decided to lay down the law and let the kid know not to mess with her brother.  The thing is, she might have applied a fair amount of pressure to the kid’s windpipe,” Bucky said honestly.

            “ _Christ_!”  Steve hissed.  “I’ll be right down there.  Would you mind waiting until I got there?  I just want to make sure I get the whole honest story.”

            “I’ll be here,” Bucky said honestly.  He really had no intention of leaving until Steve got there anyway.

            Bucky knocked on the door and poked his head inside where the secretaries were sitting.  “Hi, I’m James Barnes, I’ve been handling pick up and drop off for the Stark-Rogers kids.  I noticed what happened with Talia in the hall and I just wanted to share what I witnessed.  If that’s all right?”

            “Take a seat right here and we’ll let Principal Fury know that you’re here,” The secretary--Ms. Hill said as she motioned to the seat across from her desk.

            Bucky nodded politely as he sat down in the seat.  He glanced at his phone to make sure that Steve was coming.  He was currently ten minutes out. He was suddenly grateful that Howie and Maria had insisted on getting dropped off early because otherwise they definitely would have been late.

            Ms. Hill cleared her throat.  “Principal Fury will see you now.”

            “Thank you,” Bucky said.  “Steve--the father is on his way.  He should be here soon.”

            “I will pass the message along,” Hill said politely.

            Bucky walked into the office.  Talia was sitting in one chair and Principal Fury was sitting across from her.  It was comical, really. Talia had no fear of this man and from what Bucky could tell, she had no reason to be fearful of the principal, but his face and overall demeanor was intimidating.  The man had a fake eye with a scar over it. His whole face said “don’t fuck with me” and yet, Talia was sitting there with her arms crossed looking him straight in the eye. Kid had guts.

            “Mr. Barnes,” Fury said politely.  “Thank you for coming in.”

            “My pleasure,” Bucky said as he stood behind Talia.

            “I was just sticking up for my brother,” Talia muttered under her breath.

            Fury sighed.  “Then you tell a teacher, or me.  You do not take matters into your own hands, Ms. Stark-Rogers.”

            “With all due respect,” Bucky said. “She was just trying to stand up to a bully.  I’m sure you’ll agree that bullying is a much more serious issue than back when we were kids.  I’ve seen that this school has made tremendous strides to try and keep bullying out, and I think that for the most part, you’ve done a great job of that.  Talia, however, was trying to stand up against bullies, just like you all taught her to. Maybe she was a little too intense, but I think with everything these kids are going through, it might be worth it to just have her speak to the school social worker and call it a day.”

            “Social worker?” A voice asked from behind him.

            Bucky turned around to see Steve standing there looking pissed.  “Why would anyone need to see the social worker?”

            “Mr. Rogers--”

            “Mr. Fury,” Steve said deadly calm.  “Can someone please explain to me what happened?”

            “Sarge saw the whole thing,” Talia said softly.

            Steve turned to look at him.  “Care to shed some light on the situation?”

            Bucky nodded.  “Some kid was picking on AJ, making fun of his name or something.  Talia stepped in by pinning the kid to the wall and telling him to back off.”

            Steve looked back to Fury.  “Is the other kid all right?”

            “He’s fine, the nurse checked him out and we notified the mother that there was an altercation with another child and she’s on her way down here to take him home,” Fury said calmly.

            “Is he going to be punished for what he said to my son?” Steve crossed his arms.

            “Ordinarily, he would be, but I think that your daughter has already done enough.  I don’t think you understand the severity of the situation, Captain--”      

“Don’t call me Captain.  Steve is fine.”

            “Steve,” Fury relented.  “Talia took this from a verbal altercation to a physical one--”

            “Talia, can you wait outside with Ms. Hill?” Steve asked not looking away from Fury.  Talia stood up silently and walked out the door. The moment the door shut Steve began to grind his teeth.  

            “My kids are going through hell, Fury.  The least you could do is make sure that there aren’t other kids giving them crap while they’re trying to get back to normal!” Steve spat.  “She overreacted. Big fucking deal. Her dad died, and then she had to see her brother get bullied. Tell me you wouldn’t want to knock someone’s skull in if you were in her position!”

            “Steve--” Fury began.

            “So now my daughter is going to get in trouble for standing up for her brother, because none of the teachers or administrators or any _adult_ was paying attention!  That’s bullshit, Fury! I’m sorry that this kid got hurt, but you know my kids are good kids!  I think at the very least you owe my daughter the benefit of the doubt here!” Steve was yelling now, actually yelling.  Bucky was really proud to see that Steve was genuinely looking out for his kids and sticking up for them. It was actually pretty damn attractive watching Steve ream Fury out like this to protect his daughter.

            “Steve, Talia choked another student today!”

            “Barely,” Steve shouted back.  “She was looking out for her brother!”

            “I can’t let it slide.  One day of in-school suspension,” Fury snapped.  “End of discussion.”

            Steve shook his head angrily.  “Unacceptable! This is outrageous.  You can’t let this slide. It’s the first time you’ve ever had her in your office!”

            “I can’t exactly look the other way here!” Fury put his arms out in frustration.  “This isn’t up for discussion!”

            “Screw that!  You’re the principal!  You know the situation here--”

            “And I sympathize!” Fury said.  “But Steve, she could have really hurt the other child!  She was the one who got physical!”

            “It’s nice to see that you’re protecting bullies here, Fury!” Steve began pacing back and forth.  “Not only do the kids have to defend themselves but they get in trouble when they do? How outrageous!  You should be disgusted. These are kids and instead of punishing the bully, you’re gonna punish the kid sticking up for what’s right!”

            “Steve, I am not going to do this with you,” Fury said calmly.  “I’m sorry that you feel this way, but there was no need for this to turn physical and Talia made it physical.”

            Steve waved dismissively at him.  “Come on, Fury! You know that this isn’t right!”

            “It’s not up for discussion,” Fury said, finality in his voice.  “It’s one day. She’ll be fine.”

            “You’re teaching the wrong lesson here, Fury!” Steve yelled.  “You’re telling them-- all these kids-- that if they stick up to their bullies, they’ll be in trouble!”

            Fury shook his head again.  “I’m sending the message that violence will not be tolerated in this school!  Now, enough. You can feel however you want about it, but this conversation is over.”

            Steve didn’t even say anything, he just stormed out of the office and Bucky was just sitting there in shock.  After a moment, he stood up and nodded to the principal.

            “Thank you for your time.” Bucky nodded politely as he exited the office.

            Talia was no longer in sight and neither was Steve.  He glanced around for a moment, trying to see if he was missing something.

            “Talia was sent back to class and Steve stepped outside,” Ms. Hill said politely.

            “Thanks,” Bucky said as he walked out of the school and saw Steve was pacing outside of the building.

            “This is absurd!” Steve said the moment he saw Bucky.  “She was just trying to be a good sister! How could Fury not see this?”

            Bucky grimaced.  “It was a rough call, but it’s one day.  She’ll be fine.”

            “That’s not the point, she shouldn’t have to deal with this,” Steve said angrily.  “My kids are going through enough! They don’t need to be dealing with fucking bullies too!”

            “I hear you,” Bucky said.  “Still her reaction was a tad extreme--”

            “What would you have done if it were one of your sisters getting bullied?” Steve was livid, that much was clear.

            Bucky gave him an exasperated look.  “I don’t know. Sure I beat some assholes up who messed with my sister, but it was a different time, and we were older.  This is a little young to be getting physical.”

            Steve gave him a look.  “I’d bet if it were the other way around things would be different.  If AJ was looking out for Talia, I bet they’d just say boys will be boys and call it a day!  This is sexism!”

            Bucky raised an eyebrow.  “I think this is because they’re six.  Not because she’s a girl.”

            Steve shook his head.  “I’m not so sure. I think maybe I should reach out to my lawyer, see what he says.”

            Bucky sighed.  “If you think that’s best.  I just think that he was in a tight spot since she was the only one who got physical.”

            Steve gritted his teeth but didn’t say anything for a moment.  “I’ll sleep on it.”

            “Where’s the baby?” Bucky asked realizing that Jamie was nowhere to be seen.

            “He’s with Riley.” Steve put his hands on his hips.  “I wasn’t sure how long I was gonna be here, and since he started walking, Riley’s wanted to see it first hand.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Makes sense.”

_Status Report: One Month Since Home Invasion_

_Family is preparing for Thanksgiving_

            “Howie!  Your room better be spotless,” Steve called upstairs.  The other kids were in the kitchen baking cookies.

            “When is Sarah coming home?” Maria asked.  She was practically beaming as she was mixing the cookie dough.

            “She’ll be home Wednesday.  I figured we could decorate the tree Saturday before she has to go back Sunday,” Steve said as he was helping Talia put on an apron.

            “Do you think she’ll watch the parade with us?” AJ asked as he stole a pinch of cookie dough from Maria’s bowl when she wasn’t looking.

            “You’ll have to ask her.  Remember, your sister will probably want to see some of her friends when she’s here too.  She hasn’t been home since…” Steve’s voice trailed off.

            “I hope she’ll play spies with me!” Harrison said excitedly as if Steve hadn’t said anything.  “We used to play that game all the time!”

            Steve sighed.  “This trip might be a little hard for your sister.  She hasn’t been here like we all have. It may be a little strange for her being home for the first time since Daddy passed.  I think we should all try to be sensitive to that.”

            Howie rolled his eyes.  “We’ll be on our best behavior when St. Sarah decides to grace us with her presence.”

            Steve suddenly became very serious.  “What is that supposed to mean?”

            Howie shook his head.  “Nothing. It doesn’t mean anything.”

            “I won’t have you two fighting!  These holidays are going to be difficult enough for all of us.  I don’t need the two of you fighting on top of that,” Steve said sternly.

            Howie laughed cynically.  “I’ll make sure to steer clear of her then.”

            “Not what I meant,” Steve snapped.

            “Fine!”  Howie put his hands up defensively.  “I’ll make sure I don’t do anything to upset the prodigal child!”  With that Howie stood up from the stool he was currently resting on and stormed up the steps, closing his bedroom door with a slam.

            Steve was seething; Bucky could see it.  His breathing was heavy and he hadn’t blinked since Howie had stormed out of the room.  Still, he had managed to keep his cool. He took a deep breath and turned back to the other kids.  “Who wants to help me put the cookies in the oven?”

_Slight confrontation with oldest boy and Rogers.  Rogers seemed to handle the situation well._

            Bucky watched on while the others baked cookies, and he monitored Howie on the tablet.  His room was secured and his tracker said that he was exactly where he was supposed to be.  Bucky assumed that there was some sibling rivalry between the two oldest children. He wasn’t sure how easy that would be to navigate when Sarah came to town.

            According to Clint’s reports, Sarah was doing well.  As far as he could tell, if someone was following her as Clint suspected, they were keeping their distance.  It was a relief. At least she hadn’t had to deal with a home invasion of her own. He could only imagine what that could do to a kid that had just had to come to terms with the fact that her father was murdered by terrorists.

            “Hey, Sarge!” Maria called to him from the counter.

            “What’s up?” Bucky asked as he made his way over to her.  

            “Want to help us with the next batch?” Maria asked as she handed him the wooden spoon.

            Bucky smiled.  “If it’s all right with your Pops--”

            “It’s fine,” Steve said as he took Jamie out of his high chair.  “If anything you’ll make sure that it’s edible. They like to get creative with the recipe,”Steve teased them as he began heading up the steps.  “I gotta change Jamie and then check in on the other _baby_ that just had a tantrum.”

            Bucky raised an eyebrow.  He was impressed. Steve was handling this like a normal parent.

            “All right.” He turned back to the kids.  “I don’t know the recipe, so what’s first?”

            It turns out that Steve was right.  The kids tried to get Bucky to put all types of weird ingredients in the cookie dough, that even Bucky knew was a no-go.  

            Apparently, Steve was hellbent on hosting the holiday.  He said that he wanted to keep busy and try not to think about Tony, and how this was going to be their first of many holidays without him.  Bucky wasn’t sure that it was going to work out the way that Steve wanted it to.

            Steve came back down the steps fifteen minutes later to an actual kitchen nightmare.  Bucky was almost certain that Gordon Ramsey never saw anything half as atrocious as the Stark-Rogers kitchen.  Still, Steve just laughed and shook his head as he walked over to them.

            “I leave you all alone for five minutes, and this happens?” He shook his head and rubbed his forehead.

            “Sorry,” Bucky said as he glanced around the warzone-like mess.  “I’ll help you clean it up.”

            “That’s not necessary--”

            “It’s the least I could do,” Bucky said.  “I was too preoccupied with what they were putting in there rather than where it was going and it wasn’t in the dough.”

            Steve just laughed.  “Somehow the kitchen always winds up looking like this after we try to bake.”

            “Sorry, Papa,” Harrison said.  However, his face didn’t look sorry.  He looked as though he was finding the whole thing hilarious.  It was clear that he was trying very hard not to laugh.

            Steve cracked another smile at that.  “You’ve got all kinds of food in your hair, Harrison.  How? How did this happen?”

            The little one just laughed and gave a small shrug.  “We were just having fun, Papa.”

            “Besides.”  Talia put her hands on her hips.  “I thought you said the one place we can make a mess _is_ the kitchen.”

            Steve raised an eyebrow at that.  “I didn’t mean to bomb it. Seriously, did you hide explosives in the dough?”

            AJ and Harrison laughed at that, while the girls just exchanged knowing looks.  It was refreshing to the usually solemn atmosphere that usually filled the house.  

            Steve took a deep breath.  “Well, you all need to head off to baths.  Harrison, you’ll go last, just go pick out some PJs in the meantime, and pick some toys, okay?”

            The kids all scampered off at that.  It was clear that they just did not want any part of cleaning up this mess.  It wasn’t as though he blamed them. Steve wasn’t wrong. It really did look like a bomb went off in there.

            Bucky picked up some of the dirty bowls and started loading them into the dishwasher, while Steve began wiping down some of the countertops.  They were going to be at it for a while. This was definitely not a two-man job. Bucky was almost certain there was cookie dough on the ceiling.  This was a professional job and Bucky was definitely not trained for this.

            “I’ve been meaning to ask,” Steve said after a few minutes of scrubbing.  “I know it’s a long shot, and it was the kids’ idea, so do not feel obligated to say ‘yes’ or anything like that.”

            Bucky turned to look at him.  “Shoot?”

            “Thanksgiving is coming up, and I know that this probably seems silly, me hosting it and all.  I know that we’ve been through a lot and it seems like going around the table and asking what my family is thankful for might seem like a sick joke.  All that being said, we really _do_ have a lot to be grateful for.  After what happened a month ago… things could have gone a lot differently, and we have _you_ to thank for that,” Steve was rambling.  He pinched the bridge of his nose nervously.  “Anyway, what I’m trying to say is, that if you had any interest in inviting your family over for Thanksgiving dinner, they are more than welcome.”

            Bucky’s jaw went slack for a moment before he abruptly closed it.  “Um, that’s really sweet of you. I just… my sisters have their own families now, and I just don’t think it’d be appropriate.  I’m _working._  This is my job.  Not that I’m not enjoying my time here or anything, it’s just… part of how I do my job is keeping that all separate.  Besides, if my family gets involved it could… compromise me. If there’s anyone watching and they figure out those are my relatives… they could use that against me, and then that could affect how I do my job here.  The last thing that I want is to compromise us here.”

            Steve nodded in understanding.  “Of course. I didn’t mean to overstep.  It’s just… having you here… living here. The kids are starting to see you in a different light.  I mean I am too… you’re probably going to be here a while, and we just want you to feel comfortable.”

            “Thank you,” Bucky said honestly.  “I really appreciate the offer, and I do--feel comfortable, I mean.  I just don’t want to get _too_ comfortable that I forget my mission here.  Does that make sense?”

            “Yes.  Yes, I completely understand where you’re coming from,” Steve said as he went back to wiping down the stove.  “I just thought you should know that they’re welcome here.”

            “Thank you,” Bucky said as he started to clean the dirty dishes in the sink.  “I’ll keep that in mind.”

            Steve smiled at him for a moment before going back to what he was doing.  It was genuine. Real. It was one of the first times that Bucky thought he truly saw Steve let his guard down.  It was definitely refreshing.

_Three days after the kitchen nightmare.  Sarah arrives._

            Sarah Stark-Rogers.  The only child that Bucky had yet to meet.  He had no idea what to expect when she walked through the door.  He knew that Clint would be with her, and he was almost certain that Steve was going to grill Clint like it was no one’s business.  

            Bucky was looking forward to getting access to that laptop.  He was certain that there had to be some information on there.  Unfortunately, their plans to get access to it were sidetracked by the Hydra attack at the house.  After the attack, Bucky didn’t want Sarah out of Clint’s sight.

            Steve had also been anxiously awaiting Sarah’s return.  He’d been in hyperdrive cleaning the house the three days leading up to Sarah’s arrival.  The kids even had to go clean their own rooms, which was laughable as there was hardly any signs of life in those rooms for as long as Bucky had been there.  To his knowledge, the kids were all still sleeping up in Steve’s room, and only went into their bedrooms if they needed space from their siblings or father.

            Sarah went to school eight hours away, and based off of the update that Bucky had gotten from Clint, they hadn’t exactly gotten an early start on the road.  Bucky had been tracking them himself, to make sure that they didn’t have any issues getting to the home. He knew from experience that there could be complications relocating subjects.

_Talia had concerns over her brother’s safety._

            Bucky was in his room monitoring their progress when Talia just walked in and sat down in the chair across from his desk.  “Sarge, I’ve got a problem.”

            Bucky looked up at her from his laptop.  “What’s going on, kiddo?”

            “This boy at school, won’t leave AJ alone, and the last time I took care of it, I got in school suspension,” she said as she crossed her arms.  “You remember?”

            Bucky nodded.  “Did you tell the teachers or the principal?”

            She gave him a look.  “Why? So they could give him a slap on the wrist?  No one cares. They only pay attention when we act bad because our dad died.”

            “Did you tell your Pa?” He asked again, trying very hard to stay out of this situation.

            She blinked. “So he could freak out on the principal again?”

            Bucky gave her a look.  “What’s the ask?”

            “Your job is to keep us safe, right?” She probed him.

            He nodded.  “Yeah, of course.  Is this kid threatening AJ’s safety?  Last I saw, he was just saying some nasty stuff.”

            She looked at him darkly.  “That stuff is just as bad!  Sarge, I really thought that you’d understand!”

            “I do, I do,” Bucky said honestly.  “I’ll look into it, Talia. I’ll do some investigating and I’ll keep you posted on what I decide, okay?”

            She looked at him suspiciously.  “Promise?”

            “Pinky promise,” Bucky said confidently.   He held out his pinky finger and after a moment of staring at him carefully, she interlocked her pinky with his.

            Talia stood up from the chair and made her way over to the door before she turned around.  “I’m sorry you don’t get to spend Thanksgiving with your family. It really sucks that my dad won’t be here, and that’s just one person.  I would really be sad if we didn’t have Sarah, or any of my brothers and sisters here either.”

            “I think this is a little different,” Bucky said after a moment.  “I still get to talk to my sisters and stuff. Besides, this is not the first time I’ve had to spend Thanksgiving away from home.  All that said, this is much nicer than where I’d usually be working.”

            “Really?” She asked.

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah. I guess I like you guys.”

            She laughed at that before hugging him where he sat in the chair.  “I guess we like you too, Sarge.” Bucky felt his heart swell at that.  Damn. He was getting closer than he had planned too. Still, it was hard to work any case like this, long term and not become attached.  He didn’t want to think about how hard it would sting when he would have to inevitably leave.

            Talia detached herself from Bucky, before she skipped out of the room.  He let out a deep breath as he went back to monitoring Barton and Sarah’s location, with corresponding traffic patterns.  It all looked fine. There was nothing suspicious, but Bucky would feel a hell of a lot better when they finally got there.

            There was another knock on his door.  Bucky turned around to see Steve standing in his doorway.  “Mind if I come in?”

            Bucky motioned for him to enter, which was comical in it of itself.  This was Steve’s house after all. He quite literally owned the place.  “Everything okay?”

            “Just a little anxious.  I mean Sarah’s… I just want to make sure she gets here okay.”  Steve crossed his arms and looked down at his shoes. Bucky didn’t blame him for being nervous.  Tony died under similar circumstances.

            “Yeah,” Bucky agreed.  “I get that.” He cleared his throat.  “If you want to come over here, I’m monitoring their location and comparing it to traffic patterns in the area.”

            Steve came up behind him and seemed to let out a sigh of relief.  “Really?”

            Bucky nodded.  “See how they’re moving, and look at the traffic pattern on this page.”  Bucky was pointing at the satellite images on the screen. “They look to be moving exactly the way they’re supposed to be.”

            “Are they straying from the beaten track at all?” Steve asked, staring at the screen intently.

            “No,” Bucky said honestly.  “We considered it, but there are a lot of people on the road traveling for the holiday.  We figure keeping them in public and on the predictable path is the best way to fly under the radar in this situation.  Besides, it’s not exactly like Sarah’s location has been a secret leading up to this. I’m not even convinced that anyone is after her.  That said, I didn’t want to leave anything to chance.”

            “Smart,” Steve said.  “Hiding in plain sight.”

            “When she and Clint get here, we’ll discuss the plan to get her back to school.  We may keep to this or decide on something different.” Bucky looked over his shoulder to Steve.  “I’ll keep you posted on what we decide.”

            “Thanks,” Steve said distractedly.  He was clearly still paying attention to the screen.  “Do you mind if I just keep watching her for a little bit?”

            “You’re welcome to,” Bucky said as he got up and pulled the other chair that was usually across from the desk, around by them.

            “Oh, thanks,” Steve said distractedly as he sat down, his eyes not moving from the screen.  They sat like that for a while, side-by-side in comfortable silence, just watching the trackers moving with the traffic pattern pulled up next to it.

            Bucky’s phone buzzed.  Barton.

            “Go,” Bucky said as he stood up, answering the phone.

            “Taking a quick pit stop.  Little lady’s gotta pee, and then we’ll be back on the road,” Clint said.

            “Make it quick, please,” Bucky said.  He was really hoping that this wouldn’t affect much.

            “We’re stopping at a Panera.  It’s got a single unisex bathroom stall.  I can wait outside and know she’s the only one in there.  I thought this through, Barnes,” Clint said calmly. “We’ll be in and out.”

            Bucky rubbed his forehead, nervously.  “Copy that. See you soon.”

            “Who was that?” Steve was no longer looking at the screen, but at Bucky.  His face was ridden with anxiety and Bucky was not looking forward to this conversation.

            “Barton.  He was just letting me know that they were making a quick pit stop before they continue,” Bucky said calmly.

            Steve nodded.  “You feel comfortable with that?”

            “Yeah,” he said a little more confidently than he felt.  “I don’t love it, but I trust Barton’s judgement, and from what he’s said, he’s taking all the necessary precautions.”

            Steve took a short breath and nodded again.  “Is it really necessary? The pit stop?”

            Bucky crossed his arms.  “She has to use the bathroom, Steve.  They’ve been on the road for hours.”

            Steve nodded frantically, pinching the bridge of his nose.  “Okay, okay.”

            “Why don’t you step away from the laptop for a little bit?  We’ve been looking at it for the better part of two hours,” Bucky said gently.

            Steve shook his head.  “I just need to make sure she’s okay--”

            “Steve,” Bucky said slowly.  “This isn’t like Tony. Tony was a target--a _known_ target.  This isn’t the same thing.  No one has moved against Sarah… ever.  You can’t get worked up over a pit stop.  She’s fine. She’s in good hands.”

            “Please.  Don’t make me leave,” his voice cracked.  “Just until they get back in the car?”

            Bucky sighed as he walked over to the computer and shut it down.  “I will let you know when they’re back on the road. I will let you know if they run into any issues.  I will keep you posted. I need you to calm down and focus on the six other kids that are in the house right now.”

            Steve stood up angrily, but didn’t argue.  He just walked out of the room, and wouldn’t look back to Bucky.  Bucky didn’t have time to worry about Steve’s feelings right now. If there was an issue, Steve would have definitely been a distraction in the process of trying to fix everything.  He’d tell Steve when they were back on the road again, and that would be the end of it.

            Bucky booted the laptop back up and kept his phone out.  He waited. This was the worst part of running missions remotely.  The waiting. He trusted that Barton had this under control, but now he had Steve’s reaction in the back of his head, definitely adding more stress to it than he’d care to admit.

            After the longest fifteen minutes of Bucky’s life, his phone began to buzz.

            “Barnes.” He pressed answer on the first ring.

            “We’re heading back on the road now,” Barton said.  “We should be by you in no more than three hours.”

            “Thanks,” Bucky said as he felt relief flood through him.  “Let me know if you take any more pit stops.”

            “Will do.” The line went dead.

            Bucky took a deep breath as he walked out of the guest room.  He used the tracker to find Steve in the living room playing with Jamie and Harrison on the rug.  Harrison was playing with his legos on the table while Jamie was quite frankly making a mess of the toy kitchen set that he had.

            Steve was sitting in the middle, helping Harrison build and fake-eating the food that Jamie was running back and forth to him.  It was comical to see Steve, this living monument, pretending to eat fake food enthusiastically while also helping build a space center.

            “Hey,” Bucky said as he sat down on the floor next to him.  “They’re back on the road.”

            Steve nodded, not looking at him.  

            “C’mon, Steve.  You’re gonna act like I kicked your puppy now?” Bucky stood up, shaking his head.  “I needed to focus on doing my job and making sure that your daughter gets here safe.  I can’t do that if you need me to hold your hand too. Tell me you wouldn’t have made the same decision if you were in my shoes.”

            Steve shot him a look.  “I’m not gonna do this around the two little ones, who are just trying to play.  If you want, we can talk about it later.”

            Bucky laughed darkly.  “I’m not the one with the issue, Steve.  I’ve been honest about my role here from the get-go.  I don’t know what you want from me.”

            Harrison looked over at his father.  “Pa, what’s wrong? Are you and Mr. Bucky fighting?”

            Steve’s face brightened up.  “No, we’re not fighting. We’re just having a discussion.”  Steve stood up. “Which we will continue in the kitchen.”

            Bucky motioned for Steve to lead the way as they left the room.  

“Maria, give us the room, please,” Steve said as they walked into the kitchen.

            Maria, who was sitting at the island, looked up at him.  “Why?”

            “Because I said so,” Steve said, giving her a look.  “Seriously, give us the room for like ten minutes.”

            She rolled her eyes as she hopped off the stool she was sitting on and made her way out of the room.  

The moment she was out of ear shot, Steve’s eyes snapped over to Bucky.  “I had a right to know what was going on!”

            “I gave you the information as I received it,” Bucky said honestly.  “You freaking out in there made it difficult for me to come up with countermeasures if an issue did arise.  My job is to anticipate situations and solve them before they become an issue. I couldn’t focus on that, with you having a mini-meltdown in there.  I understood that you were concerned, as you should have been. I just need you to try and trust me to do my job here. I think I did a pretty good job when we had the intruders here.”

            “Yeah, and my sixteen-year-old witnessed you shoot someone!” Steve hissed.

            “I think you and I can both agree that was better than the alternative,” Bucky said exasperatedly.  “Sometimes, we have to do what it takes to keep everyone safe. Sometimes that is going to mean keeping you in the dark for _fifteen minutes_ , sometimes longer.  I told you, I take this seriously.  That doesn’t mean you’re gonna like every call I make.  I’m not playing games here, Steve. My job is to keep you and your family safe.  That means focusing on the situation at hand, and not worrying about the grown man--who I know is safe, having an anxiety attack. I’ve gotta pick and choose my battles here, Steve.”

            “I think _you_ can understand why I have my concerns,” Steve said as he crossed his arms.  “I’m trying here. I’m really trying to look past it, but _Tony_ … Tony trusted you… and I’m not talking about you specifically, there were quite a few people assigned to him that weren’t able to keep him safe, and I get it, okay!  I served. I know you can’t save everyone. I just can’t lose any of my kids. They are the only reason I am still functioning, and I know you don’t think that I’m doing a very good job, but my husband just died a little over two months ago, so I think that I’m managing very well all things considered! I just… I think I’m allowed to have some trust issues here!”

            Bucky took a deep breath.  “I understand why you feel the way that you do, and you’re right.  I don’t have any answers as to why Tony’s location was compromised.  I don’t know how they found us, and made us look like morons. We were completely unprepared. I don’t want to be unprepared again, which is why I kicked you out.  I kicked you out so I could focus my sole attention on making sure that we weren’t caught off guard again. This is personal for me. I know it shouldn’t be, but I failed you all once.  It won’t happen again.”

            Steve nodded.  “I’m sorry. I get crazy when it comes to my kids, especially Sarah.  She’s just been so far away. Physically, emotionally, and I don’t know what to do.  She and Tony were so close, and I don’t think I can reach her. If anything happened to her…”

            “I’m not gonna let anything happen to any of them,” Bucky said honestly.  “It’ll be over my dead body.”

            Steve gave him a look.  “Don’t make promises that you can’t keep, Barnes.”

            “I’m not,” Bucky said, looking him dead in the eye.  “I mean it, Steve.”

            Steve nodded.  “I’ll try to back off.  It’s just--these are my kids.  I don’t know if I can let go of the wheel without having a reaction.”

            “Understood,” Bucky said.  He couldn’t relate, but he could respect where Steve was coming from.

            Steve took a sigh of relief.  “But they’re back on the road?”

            “Yes,” Bucky said.  “They’re on the road and should be here in no more than three hours.  She’ll be here soon, and then you can relax a little bit.”

            Steve laughed at that.  “I doubt it. She and Howie have a history of going at it.  Siblings. I never had that. It was quite the culture shock. Tony was an only child too, so we were really at a loss when they started fighting at ages 5 and 7.”

            Bucky laughed at that.  He used to fight with his sisters like it was no one’s business.  That said, he was always in their corners. “Kids can be like that.  I’m sure once Howie goes off to school, and feels less pressure here, it’ll be easier.  Rebecca and I barely spoke till I went off to basic. Then when I’d come home, she was like my best friend.”

            Steve had stopped listening, though.  It was clear he was still focused on something else.  “Pressure? I’m sorry, what ‘pressure’ is Howie experiencing here?”

            Bucky’s jaw went slack.  “Well, I mean. He’s definitely stepped up here.  He helps get the other kids ready in the morning. He helps them with their homework.  Hell, he’s even been on top of teeth brushing and bathing. Personally, I’d be feeling the pressure too.  Add that to the fact that he’s a junior in high school… I’d probably lash out at the one person who seems to be removed from all the extra stress too.”

            Steve frowned at that.  “I guess… maybe I have relied on him too much.”

            Bucky shrugged.  “I don’t know. I think that’s natural, and from what I’ve seen, a lot of it was him taking up the initiative and doing what needed to be done.  This stuff, from what I can see, leads people to either bounce back, bounce higher, or stay down for longer. I think Howie just threw himself into taking care of everyone else.  It makes it easier to quiet your pain. For a while.”

            Steve huffed.  “It’s still a lot to be on the shoulders of a sixteen-year-old.”

            “You’re right,” Bucky agreed.  “Maybe this is a good time to show him that he doesn’t _need_ to do all that stuff anymore.  That said, you’ve still got five other kids here and it’s a lot.  He’s been a big help.”

            Steve shook his head.  “He’s a kid. He should be a kid.  Not my co-parent. That’s not fair, and I’ve been content to let him be, because it was easier than having to deal with my own shit.”

            Bucky patted him on the shoulder.  “I don’t know. I think you’re on the right track.  Under the circumstances, I think you’re doing a pretty damn good job.  It’s just your circumstances are more complicated than most people in your situation.  That’s why I was so hard on you in the beginning. I hope you know I wasn’t judging.”

            Steve raised an eyebrow.  “You threatened to call CPS.”

            “I never said CPS,” Bucky chuckled.  “It was a bluff. I just wanted to light a fire under you.”

            “Sure it was,” Steve said sarcastically.  “Look, I get it. I was a mess, and I still had six kids who needed me to be less of a mess.  I’m just doing my best here.”

            Bucky sighed.  “Sometimes, we’ve gotta push ourselves to be better than that.  We need a new “best,” if that makes sense. I’m doing everything I can to keep history from repeating itself, and you’re doing everything you can to transition into this new, horrible, single parent role.  You’ll get there, you already are.”

            Bucky gave Steve one last pat on the shoulder before he turned around and made his way back up the steps.  He needed to keep monitoring everything. He wasn’t going to leave anything to chance this time around.

_Barton and Sarah arrive precisely on time_.

            Like clockwork, Barton and Sarah showed up three hours later.  It was impressive. Barton certainly took this all very seriously, which was a relief.  Bucky made his way down the steps as he heard the eruption of noise coming from the entryway of the house.  He waited by the foot of the steps, next to Howie, who was definitely less enthusiastic about his sister’s return than his brothers and sisters.

            “Sarah!” Harrison practically shrieked in delight.  “I missed you so much!” He threw himself into Sarah’s arms as she tried to get through the door.

            “Hey, Har!  Look at how tall you got!”  She bent down to grip him tighter.  “I missed you so much too! How’s school?  Do you like your teacher?”

            Harrison nodded.  “Miss Peggy is the best! You should come to the school!  I want to show you my art!”

            Her face fell a bit, but then she perked back up. “If we have time, sure!  Remember this is a tiny visit. When I come home for Christmas in a month, I’ll be all yours!”

            “Let her through the door,” Steve said sweetly.  “She’s gotta breathe, you know.”

            She smiled gratefully to her father as the kids backed up just enough for her and Clint to walk through the entryway.

            The twins were next.  They practically tackled her as she put down her suitcase.  “Hey, you two! What is Pa feeding you all? I swear you all got so much taller than when I was home a few months ago!”

            Maria was waiting patiently for the twins to let her go when she pulled her sister into a bone crushing hug and just started crying.  “I missed you so much!”

            Sarah let out a sigh as she began stroking her sister’s dark hair soothingly.  “I missed you too. I had to go almost three full months without my partner in crime.  But, I’m here now. Let’s make the most of it, okay?”

            Maria nodded, but still did not let go of her sister for a few moments after that.  It was clear. Sarah was missed.

            When the two sisters finally detached, Sarah looked over to Steve.  There was something in the way she looked at him. She wasn’t thrilled, but it wasn’t unhappy either.  She was conflicted... about what, Bucky had no idea.

            “Hey, Papa.”  She moved her blonde hair out of her face, revealing her light eyes.  This was Steve’s daughter, plain and simple. “You look good.” She hugged him briefly before taking a step back to look at him.  “Where is my munchkin?”

            “Jamie is asleep.  You got a late start, and his bedtime was an hour ago.  You can see him tomorrow morning,” Steve said lightly.

            She nodded.  “Fair.” She glanced around and her eyes trailed up the steps.  They stopped on her brother. “Howie. You look well.”

            Howie tutted.  “You too. How was college?  Did you have a killer semester?”

            “Semester’s not over yet,” she said as she approached the steps.  “But of course, you already knew that.”

            Howie shrugged as he descended the steps slowly.  “Maybe. I’m glad you’re home. I was worried.” His tone didn’t exactly match his words, but it didn’t matter.  He was being polite and Bucky had no reason to believe that he was being less than genuine.

            “I’m fine.  It’s me who’s been worried.  I heard about the home invasion.  It must have been terrifying,” she said as Howie reached the last step.  She hugged him closely to her and it seemed to be genuine. She really did seem worried.

            Howie rubbed her back for a moment before backing up.  “Yeah? Well, you could have called. We would have told you how we were all holding up.”

            Her face distorted as if she had just been sucking on something sour as she backed away from him a step.  “I spoke with Clint,” she motioned to Barton, who was still near the doorway. “And Papa. I checked in. I just… didn’t know what to say to you all.”

            “‘Happy you’re okay,’ is a pretty good start, Sar,” Howie said seriously.  

            She gave him a look.  “Look, communication is a two way street, you didn’t exactly send me a text either.”  She paused and looked around. Everyone was watching them, waiting for a spark to set the bomb off.  “Let’s not do this, Howie. It’s Thanksgiving. It’s been a really hard couple of months for all of us.  I don’t want to fight right now.”

            Howie looked around too.  He must have caught the memo--not the time or place.  “You’re right. We shouldn’t fight right now. I really did miss you.”

            Her face softened at that.  “I missed you too, booger.”

            Howie rolled his eyes as he walked off the steps and joined Harrison on the couch, watching Paw Patrol recordings.

            Sarah looked over to Bucky and smiled.  This seemed a little less genuine--like she knew that she wanted to make a good first impression.  “You must be Sergeant Barnes! I hear I have you to thank for keeping my family safe.”

            Bucky smiled tightly as he hopped down the steps to her.  He shook her hand politely. “It’s a pleasure. I’ve heard so much about you, it’s a privilege to finally meet you in the flesh.”

            “Likewise,” she said.  She looked over to Clint.  “Thank you for sending Agent Barton to look after me.  He’s been so attentive and helpful. It was so nice to feel that sense of safety with everything that’s been going on.”

            Bucky’s eyes darted over to Clint.  This girl knew how to play the game.  Her face may have been all Steve, but her words were all Stark.  She knew how to PR like it was no one’s business. She’d be a great politician one day.  

            “I’m glad we were able to help,” Bucky said politely.  “I’m sure you’ve had a long trip and would like to relax, and catch up with everyone.  I’m just going to steal Agent Barton for a few moments to debrief.”

            “Oh,” Steve interjected.  “Let me know when you’re done, so I can show Agent Barton where he’ll be staying.”

            Bucky nodded as Clint smiled politely and followed him up the steps.  Bucky led him into his bedroom and locked the door behind him. They had a lot to discuss.

            “I’ll try and keep this as brief as possible, since you were just in a car for almost ten hours--”

            “Not gonna be brief, Sarge,” Clint said seriously.  “I kept one of my last status reports… let’s just say I wasn’t very forthcoming.”

            Bucky’s brow furrowed.  “What? Why? Barton, this is serious.”

            “That’s why I didn’t trust it not to be compromised.”  His voice dropped. “If this is Hydra, then we don’t exactly know how they’re getting their intel.”

            “What didn’t you disclose?” Bucky asked seriously.

            “We had an incident a few days back,” Clint said grimly.

            Bucky felt himself grit his teeth.  “What kind of an incident are we talking about here, Barton?”

            Clint crossed his arms.  “There was a break-in at her dorm.  I took care of it.”

            “Why the fuck didn’t you notify me?” Bucky hissed under his breath, trying to ensure that no one would hear them.  “This is very important information, Barton!”

            “That’s not the important bit,” Barton said solemnly.  “You know how I operate. I keep my distance as best I can.  Well, little miss over there was able to hold her own, until I got there.  Barnes, these guys were not amateurs. She should have been incapacitated until I got to her, but she was holding her own, Barnes.  She is trained. Well beyond typical self defense. I’m talking martial arts here. Like high class black belt, level.”

            “What is with this girl?” Bucky asked in disbelief.

            “I’m not done, Barnes,” Clint said shaking his head.  “She wasn’t alone.”

            Bucky gave him a look.  “So she is working with someone?”

            “Not just someone, Barnes.  The Widow was there,” Clint’s voice was barely louder than a whisper.  Bucky must not have heard him right.

            “Did you just say ‘The Widow?’  Barton, do not fuck with me right now--” Bucky started.

            “Sarge, I wouldn’t make something like this up,” Barton said seriously.  “She was there, and she was fighting in our girl’s corner.”

            Bucky looked around in disbelief.  The Widow? The most elusive Russian Spy that hadn’t been had a confirmed sighting in almost twenty years. “What the fuck is going on here?”

            “According to Sarah, she’s an old friend of the family, and it tracks.  According to all the intel I could get my hands on, The Widow has been on our side for the better part of twenty years, maybe even longer.  Stark and Rogers both worked with international affairs in one way or another. It’s not that far-fetched to believe that there was a friendship forged along the way,” Clint said, and he was making sense to a degree.

            “If this is true, then…”

            “Then that hot hunk of a widower downstairs has been keeping secrets,” Barton finished for him.  “Big secrets. Maybe JARVIS level secrets, Barnes.”

            Bucky raised an eyebrow.  “And you think Baby Widow down there’s got nothing to do with it?”

            Barton shook his head.  “I didn’t say that. All I’m saying is that these people are far from ordinary.”

            There was a knock at the door.  Bucky pulled up the camera feed from his tablet to see who was there.  Sarah.

            Bucky looked over to Clint.  “What the hell is this?”

            “I told her I was going to fill you in on everything.  She probably just wants to say her piece.”

            Bucky pursed his lips tightly to keep from saying something he might regret.  He should have been informed leading up to their arrival. This whole thing was handled poorly.  “Let her in.”

            Clint walked over to the door.  He unlocked it and let Sarah inside before swiftly locking it behind her.  Her heels clicked on the hardwood floor as she made her way over to Bucky.

            “Sergeant Barnes,” she said politely.  “I am sure that you have a lot of questions for me--”

            “Just one for now,” Bucky said as he crossed his arms.  “How do you know Natalia Alianovna Romanova?”

            She gave him a confused look before she laughed.  “Aunt Natasha? I’ve known her since I was in diapers.”

            “How?”

            “She’s friends with my parents.  They’re real close with Sam Wilson, Riley Johnson, and Natasha Romanoff--as I’ve always known her,” Sarah said, seemingly honest.  “I don’t know how they met. They always just told me that it was through work. I never thought to press them. I didn’t know that she was the Black Widow or whatever.”

            “Why has she been following you?” Bucky asked, still untrusting of her.

            “My father asked her to,” Sarah said as if it were obvious.  “Do you really think that Steve Rogers would just let his first born return to school without any supervision?  For what it’s worth, I didn’t know that he asked her to look after me until after Clint said something to me about being watched.”

            Bucky looked back to Clint.  He wanted more information on that conversation later.  He turned to Sarah again. “How did you know it was her?”

            “She’s my aunt.  She reached out, shortly after.  She must have known that I suspected it was her.  She made contact in the girls bathroom at school one day.  She told me she was looking after me, and to keep it between us.”  She gave a small smile. “After everything that happened with Dad… we were skeptical that the government might have been playing us, or setting us up.  I didn’t know Clint all that well, so I listened to my aunt.”

            Bucky took a deep breath.  “What else are you hiding, Sarah?”

            She laughed.  “Nothing? I--I just want to go back to school and continue my education as if none of this happened.”

            Bucky felt his jaw go slack, before he started laughing.  He looked over to Clint, who seemed to be watching him as intently as Sarah was.  They could not be serious. “School? You were attacked, you’ve lied every step of the way here, and you think that once your Pops finds out, he will let you in a hundred foot radius of that place--”

            “Please don’t tell my father, he’d freak out,” she pleaded.  “I can’t stay here. I just can’t!”

            Bucky gave her a look.  “I don’t understand. Your family seems lovely.  They all adore you--mostly, and you have a support system to help you through this strange and difficult time.  Why wouldn’t you want to stay?”

            “Look,” she swallowed.  “My dad and I were really close.  Like really close. He and I used to talk all about his work, and I’ll admit I helped on a lot of his projects but… we knew that JARVIS was different.  He’d never tell Pa, but we knew that Hydra was interested in the project. I dropped out, early, very early in the production. I wanted _nothing_ to do with it.  Dad, on the other hand, was different.  He wanted to see this through. He knew it could do a lot of good for a lot of people.  He swore me to secrecy and continued his work.

            “Pa didn’t even know that there was a threat.  Dad didn’t tell him, because if he did… well there was no way my father would have let him go.” She paused as she shook her head.  “I should have said something, or tried to talk him out of it, but I didn’t! I listened to my dad and it got him killed. I can’t be in this house, Sergeant Barnes.  I can’t look my father in the eye, knowing that I am the reason that he is a widower. I can’t be around my siblings, knowing that I am the reason they’re all in pain. Howie... Howie knows that I could have talked him out of going.  He begged me to! He didn’t know what I knew, but he knew something was off. He blames me, and I can’t hold that against him. Please, I can’t stay here. Besides, ask Clint, I can hold my own!”

            “Who told you about Hydra?” Bucky asked.  “How did you know they were involved?”

            “Secretary Pierce,” she looked at him oddly.  “When Dad was in the early stages of development, he received word from Secretary Pierce that they had gotten wind that Hydra was trying to get access to the tech. He asked Dad to hand over everything so that they could destroy it, to keep it out of the wrong hands.  Dad refused.”

            “What was so special about this project?”

            She stared at him.  “You don’t know? They sent you looking for tech and they didn’t even tell you what it was?”

            “Part of the job,” Bucky said blankly.

            She blinked.  “JARVIS was created as the first true form of artificial intelligence.  He would have made Siri and Alexa look like child’s play. It wasn’t exactly surprising that our enemies wanted access too.”

            “I thought you didn’t know anything about JARVIS?  That you had nothing to do with it?” Bucky was believing her less and less.

            “I didn’t.  My job was just to double check his math, but I didn’t know what it was for, not right away.  Dad was all about family. We all helped him with stuff in one way or another. Howie helped on a few projects, even the kids.  He found that their ideas often inspired more developed ones. I didn’t think much of it before it was too late. It wasn’t as if AI was something that he just started dabbling in.  Dad had _several_ failed attempts leading up to this… the Vision Project, the Ultron Initiative… probably a dozen more that I can’t even remember.  None of them had any luck, and I didn’t think that JARVIS would be any different… until the government bought it.” Sarah sat down in one of the chairs and put her head in her hands.  “I should have stopped him.”

            Bucky looked at Barton and took a deep breath before rubbing his forehead.  “All right, here’s the deal. We’ll keep this between us for now. We won’t tell your Pops.  That said, Barton and I are going to have a lengthy discussion about your _potential_ leave of absence from school.  Of course it goes without saying that I need access to your phone, laptop, and any other personal devices.”

            “Why do you need that?” She asked nervously.

            Bucky raised an eyebrow.  “Quite frankly because I don’t trust you very much.  It’s nothing personal, but from what Barton tells me, you’ve been on that laptop all day every day since he’s started monitoring you.  Plus, you and I both know that there is no way to hack that thing remotely, which is just suspicious in it of itself.”

            “My dad is-- _was_ Tony Stark, do you think any of our devices can be accessed without having them physically?” Sarah crossed her arms, and goddamn if that didn’t look like a female version of the same thing Steve did.

            “I don’t really care,” Bucky said honestly.  “I need access, and I need it now, or I will go right down those steps and tell Steve everything.”

            She bit her lip, clearly weighing her options. “Okay, okay.  I will let you have my laptop, my phone and my tablet--”

            “Smart watch too,” Bucky said as he held his hand out.

            She gave him a look, but unlatched her smart watch from her wrist and handed it over to him.  “Happy?”

            “Not even close,” Bucky said.  “If there is _anything_ else that you’re hiding, I’d appreciate hearing it from you now rather than later.  You people have a tendency to make my life and job more difficult than it has to be.”

            “There’s nothing,” she said, again seemingly genuine.

            “Barton, please go make sure that she brings me her devices without tampering with them, or should I do that myself?” Bucky raised an eyebrow.

            Clint shook his head.  “I’ll take care of it.”

            Bucky nodded as Clint walked out the door with Sarah.  This had certainly not been what Bucky was expecting. He wasn’t even sure if he could actually trust a word she said or if she was just secretly working with the Russians.  She was smart and apparently a very good liar. That mixed with Rogers’s genes created the spy that the CIA would kill to have on their team.

            Clint returned a few moments later with all of Sarah’s personal devices.  “Got ‘em, Sarge.”

            Bucky motioned to the desk.  “Put them all over here.”

            Barton obeyed.  He placed the devices on the desk and stood there for a moment before he started talking.  “I think she should be allowed to go back to school, Sarge.”

            “Why?  She played us.  She played you more specifically,” Bucky said as he began powering up her laptop.

            “I think she knows something, and I think we can play her right back by letting her think that we believe her and giving her what she wants.  The fact is, I think she knows exactly where JARVIS is, and I think, in time, that she’ll lead us right to it,” he said.

            Bucky gave him a look.  “There was already one invasion--”

            “Didn’t you listen?  She handled herself, I was there and so was the fucking Widow!  Do you really think, with that combination, that she’ll be in any real danger?  Sarge, you didn’t see her, it was like something out of a comic book. She’s got moves.  She can hold her own.”

            “But she shouldn’t have to,” Bucky said after a moment.  “Let’s say she is innocent in all this, then she’s a girl who lost her father, is blaming herself, and we’re just gonna let her do that--”

            “I don’t think you really believe that,” Clint cut him off.

            “You’re right.  I don’t. But I also don’t like the idea of putting her in harm’s way,” Bucky said.  “Ultimately, our mission is to protect them. Finding JARVIS is secondary.”

            Clint shot him a look.  “If we find JARVIS, then they are safe… permanently.”

            “I’m not willing to risk them to do it,” Bucky said honestly.

            “You’re not listening, Sarge.  She’s not at risk. She’s got me, _The Widow_ , and her own skills,” Barton pressed him. “At least consider it.”

            Bucky rubbed his forehead.  “You’ve given me a hell of a lot to consider, Barton.  Did you even call the attack in?”

            “You know the answer to that,” Clint said after a moment.  “I took care of it.”

            “Fuck, Barton,” Bucky hissed.  “This was supposed to be an easy gig.  We’re in hot water as it is, with the whole Stark thing!”

            Barton gave him a look.  “Which is exactly why we’ve got to finish this!”

            “Shit, Barton,” Bucky said, shaking his head.  “This is a fucking mess.”

            “We’ve got the chance to fix it, though,” Clint said.  “If you want me to call Pierce right now and brief him on the attack, fine!  We’ll do that, but--”

            “Brief him,” Bucky said.  “But leave out The Widow, and her training.  Also, tell them we don’t want Steve to get wind of it, as you believe you’ve neutralized the threat.  This way we can continue here without it looking suspicious to Hydra, that there was no record of the attack. God only knows how they’re getting access to our intel.”

            “Do we send her back to school--”

            “I don’t fucking know yet,” Bucky said exasperated.

            Barton nodded.  “Okay. I’ll take care of Pierce, while you think on all this.”

            “Make sure you find Steve first,” Bucky said before Barton walked out the door.  “He’s got to show you where you’ll be sleeping.”

            Barton nodded.  “Copy that.” He headed out the door, and Bucky almost immediately let out a groan.  This whole thing was a mess.

 

 


	8. Chapter 7

_Status Report.  2 Days After Sarah’s Arrival.  Thanksgiving._

            There had been no talk of Sarah’s “confession” since the night she’d arrived.  Barton had mostly kept his distance, and Sarah had acted as if nothing had happened. He had to admit she was good, and could be a useful ally, if only he could trust her.

            “What time is everyone coming over?” Howie asked through a mouthful of food.  They were eating breakfast and watching the parade.

            Steve shrugged.  “I told Uncle Riley and Uncle Sam anytime after 4.”

            “Aunt Pepper isn’t coming?” Sarah asked as she bounced Jamie on her lap, who was pointing enthusiastically at the balloons on the TV.

            Steve shrugged.  “I gave her all the info and never heard back.  Remember, it’s hard for everyone this time of the year.  She and your dad were close. It might be hard for her to be here, right now, and we all need to respect that.”

            “ _We_ all have to be here,” Maria said as she was playing with her food and not touching it.

            Steve’s face distorted at that for a moment before he composed himself.  “Honey, if you,” he looked around at the others too, “or any of you, want to excuse yourself and take a minute, or an hour or even the whole day, just in your room, then you have every right to.  I just ask that you try to join us for dinner, but if that’s too hard, no worries. I want you all to do what you can.”

            Sarah smiled sweetly at him and squeezed his forearm from across the table.  “That’s very nice, Papa. We’ll all keep that in mind today.”

            Howie gave her a look, but didn’t say anything in response.  He just looked back at his food and continued to eat in silence.

            AJ came up to Steve and plopped down on his lap.  “Are we gonna write our letters to Santa today?”

            “Yeah?” Talia asked excitedly.  “We do it every year!”

            Harrison turned away from the TV and gasped.  “I want to write one too!”

            Sarah smiled.  “I don’t see why not!  We got all the catalogs in with the newspaper.  Why don’t you go look through it and see if there’s anything good in there?”

            The three of them exchanged a look as they scurried off into the living room to find the newspapers, with the toy catalogs.

            Steve smiled at the older two kids.  “Thank you two, for being so good with them.  I know how hard this must be for you both.”

            Sarah gave him a sad smile back.  “Papa, they’re like magic. They’re so sweet and innocent and they just make everything a little bit better.”

            Howie nodded.  “She’s got that part right.”  It was the only time that Bucky had actually seen them agree on anything.  It was definitely refreshing to the passive aggressive atmosphere that usually existed between the two.  “In the beginning the only thing that would make me stop crying was to hug one of them-- or all of them, or even smell Jamie’s head.”

            Sarah laughed.  “He smells so _good_.”

            Maria on the other hand, dropped her fork down on the plate.  “May I be excused, please?”

            Steve’s face dropped as he looked at her dish.  “Baby, you didn’t eat anything.”

            “I’m not hungry,” she said dully.

            Steve took a moment and nodded.  “Yeah, just clean up your plate, and you can be excused.  Let me know if it’s a stomach ache, and I’ll give you something for it.  Okay?”

            Maria just slid off the chair she was sitting at, and took her plate to the sink.  Steve watched as she dumped the food in the trash before heading upstairs to her bedroom.

            “I can go talk to her,” Sarah suggested, as Howie took Jamie from her and began lifting the little boy up into the air.

            Steve shook his head.  “I think she just needs some time.  I get it. Today’s gonna be hard. I meant what I said.  If you any of you need to excuse yourself, it’s fine. Believe me, I get it.  It sucks.”

            Sarah looked over to the stairs.  “Still, sometimes a girl just needs her sister.”

            “Give her some time.  If she’s not down in a bit, then go up and see if she wants to talk,” Steve said, glancing back over to the steps.

            The three other kids raced back into the room with all the toy catalogs.  It was almost like there was magic in the air. The atmosphere was buzzing with excitement.  

            Sarah smiled as she pulled some magic markers out from the coffee table in the living room.  “We all know the rules. One color per kid. This way Papa knows who wants what, and this way you don’t forget it in your letter to Santa.”

            “I want blue!” Harrison called out immediately.  He reached his hand up in the air and began opening and closing it, trying to get a marker.

            Sarah shook her head playfully as she handed him the blue marker.  “Make sure not to get any on Papa’s table!”

            “Use your placemats!” Steve called as Harrison scampered from the kitchen into the dining room.

            “I’ll take purple!” Talia called, and Sarah handed her the purple marker.

            “That leaves you, AJ  What color?” Sarah put her hands on her hips.

            AJ shrugged.  “What colors are left?”

            Sarah full on grinned at that.  “I don’t know, we’ve got a lot. What do you _want_ though?”

            He looked down.  “Whatever’s easiest, I guess.”

            “You’re not picky like those other kids, huh?” She asked as she leaned down to his level.

            He shrugged.  “I guess not.”

            Sarah giggled as she handed him a red marker.  “I remember what your favorite color is, smart stuff.  You can’t pull one over on me.”

            AJ giggled back as he took the marker from her and raced back to the dining room to join his brother and sister.

            “Just like magic,” Sarah said as she glanced into the dining room.  “Thank god for them.”

            Howie sat back down and put Jamie in the high chair as he gave him some more cheerios.  “What’s going on with Aunt Pepper, Pa? She never misses a Thanksgiving.”

            Steve shrugged.  “I reached out. She knows she’s always welcome.  Like I said, this might be hard for her. I know it’s not easy for us.”

            “It can’t be any harder for _her_ than it is for _us_ ,” Howie muttered under his breath.

            “No,” Steve said fairly.  “You’re right. But we’re forced to deal with it.  We can’t ignore it or pretend like it isn’t happening.  Sometimes, it’s easier for people to try and put this stuff out of their minds.  We just don’t have that option. It doesn’t mean that it’s bad that other people do.  It’s just different, and we love Aunt Pepper, and she loves us, so we’re gonna let her grieve however she needs to.  No questions asked.”

            Sarah looked down at her feet for a moment.  “Papa, how are _you_ doing?  I know things have been hard, obviously, but why did you choose to host this year?  I mean--”

            “So you could all have a safe place to go if you needed to be alone and have a moment,” Steve said, not meeting her eyes.  “There’s only so much room at Uncle Sam’s.”

            “That’s very sweet of you, Papa,” Sarah said.  She glanced down the hall that led to the dining room.  “I’m gonna go see if Harrison needs any help writing his letter.”

            “Good idea,” Steve said as Sarah left the kitchen and made her way over to the dining room.

            “Excuse me,” Bucky said.  “I’m going to go touch base with Agent Barton, while we come up with our plan for security this evening.”

            Steve nodded as Bucky made his way up the steps.  He walked over to the room that Barton had been staying it, it was right next to his own room.  He knocked on the door and it opened a crack.

            “C’mon, Barton.  It’s me,” Bucky said, exasperated.

            The door opened all the way and Bucky stepped inside.  The room was already a mess and Clint had barely been there for two days.

“Have you come to a decision?” Clint asked. “About Sarah.”

            Bucky crossed his arms.  “What did Pierce have to say about everything?”

            Barton gave him a look.  “I mean, he was less than thrilled that I delayed to report it, but overall, he thinks we did a pretty good job keeping her safe.  I didn’t mention the help that we had… from Sarah or elsewhere.”

            “Do you trust her?” Bucky asked, not meeting Barton’s eye.

            Barton shrugged.  “I don’t know if I trust her, I barely trust myself.  I still think that I can keep her safe.”

            “Do you think letting her go back will compromise this operation?” Bucky rephrased the question.  Barton was not getting off that easy.

            “No,” Barton said confidently, as if Bucky was insane for suggesting it.  “Look, all in all, she’s a good kid--”

            Bucky groaned.  “I should have known better.  You always had a soft spot for strays.”

            Barton raised an eyebrow at him.  “Did _you_ find anything worthwhile on her devices?”

            Bucky rubbed his forehead.  “To be determined…”

            “So no,” Clint said for him.  “Look, she may have kept things to herself, but she came forward--”

            “Yeah,” Bucky said in disbelief.  “Because you saw the Widow! Don’t pretend she would have come clean if you didn’t see her partner.”

            “I don’t think that we can fault this family for being cautious with us,” Barton said after a moment.  “We dropped the ball, Barnes. I’d bet that for every conversation that we have about trusting them, they’re having the same one about us.”

            “The difference is, that we’ve been able to keep them safe since--”

            “I don’t think Sarah really sees it that way,” Clint cut him off.  “I mean, she had her own skills and the Widow with her.”

            Bucky sighed.  “All the more reason why she should stay here.  I don’t think that we should let her out of our sight.”

            “She won’t be,” Clint said.  “I know you might have some reservations about keeping me on this project, but this is Hydra, Barnes.  Hydra has access to intel they shouldn’t have any means of knowing about. I don’t think that they’re just gonna stop because Sarah’s here.  I think we have a better shot if we divide and conquer.”

            Bucky sighed.  “You’re suggesting that we take the offensive, rather than the defensive.”

            “The only way that this family is ever going to be safe again is if we can find JARVIS.  This isn’t just about keeping them safe anymore. If what Sarah told us is true, we cannot afford for Hydra to get their hands on this,” Clint said.

            “Unless we’re playing right into her hand,” Bucky reasoned.  “She could have no idea where it is, and is using us to lead her to it.”

            Clint gave him a look. “Do you honestly think that if the Widow can’t find it, that we can?  Let’s be real here, Barnes.”

            “I honestly don’t even know which way is up since the two of you dropped that bomb on me,” Bucky said, shaking his head.  “ _If_ I say that the two of you go back, I’m gonna need things to be different.  Your status reports are going to have to be much more honest, even if you choose to use a code.”

            “Fair,” Clint agreed.

            “I also want you to be more hands on,” Bucky said.  “I don’t want you to leave her side.”

            “I don’t usually operate that way, Sarge,” Clint said hesitantly.

            “This isn’t a negotiation.  If you want to go back, I need this to be different.  Hydra is probably going to send in more people, and we may not have time for you to get over to her next time.  Widow or not,” Bucky said seriously.

            After a moment, Clint nodded.  “Okay. Fine, I’ll be her best freaking friend.  I won’t let the kid out of my sight.”

            “Then you can give her the good news that she’ll be going back to school,” Bucky said reluctantly.

            “I’m sure she’ll be very happy to hear it,” Clint said.  “I meant what I said, Barnes. She’s a good kid, I think she’s just trying to protect her family here.”

            “Well, I’m trying to protect her family too and that’s kind of difficult with everyone keeping secrets around here,” Bucky deadpanned.  He didn’t need Barton’s excuses, he needed this assignment to get less bizarre.

            Barton nodded.  “I hear you, but put yourself in their shoes--”

            “Look, I get it.  They are the ones who opted into this though.  A safehouse would have been a hell of a lot safer for everyone involved,” Bucky snapped.  “Sorry. I just--this whole op smells. Just like the last one.”

            Barton laughed cynically at that.  “The last one smelled a lot less. Part of what was so messed up was that it didn’t smell until it was too late.  It started to smell when we were backed into a corner. This is different. Sloppier. Hydra isn’t sloppy. This is the family not trusting us.”

            “Yeah, well, we can’t be sloppy while Hydra is an active threat.”  Bucky looked away from Clint and began pacing back and forth a bit.  “I’m gonna have to talk to Steve about the Widow situation. I won’t tell him about the attack, but I’ll just say that you uncovered it while monitoring Sarah.”

            Barton frowned.  “It’s your call, Sarge.  I just don’t know if I trust him that much either.”

            Bucky laughed at that.  “I don’t trust him as far as I can throw him, but… I think there’s been at least a morsel of truth in everything, and I can work with that.  Sarah on the other hand, she’d be an excellent lawyer, or politician.”

            “She _is_ a Poli-Sci major,” Barton said.  “But I really do think that she’s just trying to keep her family safe.”

            “Noted,” Bucky said.  He was glad that Barton was feeling protective of his charge, but he wasn’t looking to get into an argument about her.  “You can give her the good news, and I’ll press Steve later in the week. I don’t think that I’ll get much out of him today.  He’s trying to stay strong for the kids, which is almost a guarantee that he’ll be a mess on his own.”

            “Or you don’t want to ruin your boyfriend’s Thanksgiving,” Barton teased lightly.

            Bucky shook his head.  “I already did. Because of me, they don’t have Stark here today.”

            “Don’t forget that I was there.  You literally took a bullet trying to save Stark.  Besides, you weren’t the only one charged with getting him there safe.  We were blindsided, Sarge. If it’s your fault, then it’s mine too, and Pierce’s too for that matter because _none_ of us saw it coming.  Last I checked, you were not the assassin that took the shot.” Barton crossed his arms and gave him a look.  

            “Agree to disagree,” Bucky said.  “I was leading the op. I should have been more diligent.”

            “Short of joining Hydra and infiltrating them from the inside, there was nothing else you could have done to make sure that he was safe.  It sucks, but this shit happens, Barnes. Maybe you’re feeling guilty because you’ve gotta be with the family day in and day out, but it wasn’t any of our faults.” Barton leaned up against the window sill.  “Trust me. I’m always straight with you. I’d tell you if we fucked up. Hell, Pierce would have told you if we fucked up. We didn’t. We followed protocol to a tee! We can’t win ‘em all, Sarge.”

            Bucky teetered his head from side to side.  “Maybe.”

            Barton stood up straight and began walking across the room.  “Let’s go be festive. I’ve got to tell a nineteen year old that her college career isn’t in fact over.”

            Bucky followed Barton out of the room and made his way over to Maria’s bedroom.  She was still hauled up in there. He considered going in for a moment, before he stopped.  He wasn’t her father, in fact he was a big part of the reason why one of her parents couldn’t be there.  He shouldn’t overstep.

            Instead, Bucky retreated back down the stairs.  Harrison was excitedly pointing at the television screen as Santa Claus was on the TV, driving down the streets of New York City.  The twins were also watching on excitedly as Santa Claus waved from the television screen. It was nice to see them just being kids for once.

            Sarah and Howie were talking in the kitchen.  Sarah was bouncing Jamie up and down in her arms, while they were speaking urgently.

            Bucky motioned his head for Clint to see what he was seeing.  It was odd. They usually didn’t hang around each other if they could avoid it.

            “I’m just saying, we could use you around here,” Howie said below his breath.  Bucky was just able to hear it as he put in one of his wireless earbuds, and used his smart watch to listen through their trackers.

            “Howie, I’m sorry that you’ve been stuck with all this, but… I’m trying to get an education here, it’s not like I’m going on a cruise for three months,” she whispered.  “I’ll be home for a month soon, and then summer will be here before you know it.”

            “Sarah, I’m asking as your brother who needs some help here.  You wouldn’t be the first student to take a leave of absence!” He whisper yelled at her.

            “This is my future, Howie--”

            “You’re not the only one with one of those.  This is my junior year of high school, Sarah.  How am I supposed to keep up while helping keep everything afloat here.  I just need some help!” Howie was sounding desperate and Bucky didn’t blame him.  The situation sucked for all the kids, but Howie was the one who had taken on the most responsibility following everything.

            “Then talk to Pa,” she said with finality in her tone. “Howie, I love you and I’m sorry, but I’m not as strong as you are.  Not with this. I can barely be in this house and keep it together. I know it isn’t fair, but I can’t be here. Not permanently.”

            Howie’s voice cracked.  “I need my big sister, Sar.”

            She took a deep breath.  “Howie, I am so sorry. I want to be able to be the help that you need, but… I just can’t do it.  You know why! You know that I should have stopped him--”

            “This isn’t about that,” Howie said shortly.  “We had a home invasion and we were vulnerable.  I freezed, Sarah. I should have been able to take that guy no problem, but I saw Harrison, and I froze.”

            She sighed.  “It was your first time, and under very bizarre circumstances.  It happens, and everyone was fine--”

            “No!”  Howie pointed his finger in Sarah’s face.  “We are _not_ fine!  Everytime I hear a twig snap outside, or someone comes up behind me, I feel like I’m right back there.”

            She stopped bouncing with Jamie and gave him a look.  “Have you told Pa that you’re feeling this way?”

            “I think he’s got enough to worry about,” Howie said as he put his hands on his hips.  “Besides, I’ll get over it.”

            She shook her head.  “Howie, this is serious stuff.  Talk to Papa. I’m sure he’ll call someone.  Uncle Sam’s a therapist, I’m sure he can give you a good referral--”

            “You think I need a shrink?” He asked, sounding offended.

            Sarah looked down at her shoes for a moment before meeting her brother’s eyes again.  “I think with everything going on, we could all use someone to talk to.”

            “Are _you_ talking to anyone?” He asked, barely audible.

            “I’ve thought about it,” she said.  “I just… I’m worried if I go to the counseling center, they’ll tell me to go home and like I said, I can’t be here, Howie.  I _want_ to.  Oh, I want this to feel like home again _so bad_.  Instead, I feel like I’m… intruding.  Like this is some weird alternate dimension that I’ve just intruded upon.”

            Howie crossed his arms.  “Well, it’s not. I’m your brother, this is your home, and I’m asking you to stay.   _Please_.”

            She shook her head as she began walking out of the kitchen.  “I’m sorry, Howie. I just can’t.”

            Howie didn’t follow her.  Bucky had a feeling that Howie knew that was how the conversation was going to go.  Still he admired that the kid had tried to convince her anyway. It was clear that Howie didn’t exactly trust his sister either.  Howie didn’t want her to come home, and now he was begging her to stay. It didn’t track. Not really.

            Bucky logged out of the program on his app and put his earbuds away.  He didn’t need to hear anything else. It was clear that Sarah was still dead-set on returning to school.  Not that Bucky completely blamed her. This house was definitely hiding something. Oh, if these walls could talk--actually, scratch that-- they’d probably lie like the rest of the family.

            Bucky made himself mostly scarce throughout the day.  As far as he could tell, Maria hadn’t left her bedroom since breakfast, and Sam and Riley had been there for the better part of an hour.  Bucky felt that it was best to keep a low profile during the holiday. He felt it was time for family, and family he was not.

            His door opened and closed.  He looked up from his desk to see Steve there.  His back was to Bucky and his forehead was pressed to the door.  This was unusual.

            Bucky stood up from the desk and slowly walked over to him.  He awkwardly patted his shoulder. “Everything okay?”

            Steve jumped into the air and looked around at him.  “Bucky--what? Oh,” he glanced around the room. “I didn’t realize… I needed to just get away for a moment.  My room is… well it’s a common living area, and I just went into the first room I could find. I thought it was empty.”

            Bucky nodded.  Steve had tears glistening in his sapphire eyes.  “I could give you the room,” he suggested.

            Steve shook his head.  “No! No.” He looked away from Bucky for a moment as the tears began to flow freely from his eyes.

            Bucky didn’t know what possessed him to do it.  He didn’t even realize that he was doing it until it was too late.  He gently wiped the tears away from Steve’s eyes with his thumb. Steve looked at him carefully, eyes locking with his.  Bucky cleared his throat as he pulled a tissue from his pocket and handed it to the other man. “I had a feeling some of you might be needing these today.”

            Steve took the tissue, not breaking eye contact with him.  “Thank you,” he said softly. “I guess it was pretty dumb hosting this and everything.”

            Bucky shrugged.  “I thought it was a nice thing to try and do for your kids.  Make it special, let them have their own space. They were able to be as comfortable as they could possibly be under the circumstances.”

            Steve looked down and sniffled.  “Yeah, well, Tony was always making the holidays super special for them.  He used to make a cornucopia with them every year, and we did the stupid pilgrim bonnets, and the kids used to get such a big kick out it.  I just couldn’t… he was so effortless. He just knew.”

            “I think you’re doing fine,” Bucky said honestly.  “Everyone needs a place to escape to during the holidays anyway.  At least, I always needed a hiding place from my sisters.”

            Steve laughed lightly at that, his eyes still fixed on the floor.

            Bucky couldn’t help it.  He had to ask it. “How the hell do you know the Widow, Steve?”

            Steve gave more of a surprised laugh, but he still didn’t look up at him.  “I helped bring her over to our side when I served. She’s a friend. I take it your colleague spotted her.”

            “Agent Barton is good at what he does,” Bucky said honestly.  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

            Steve shrugged.  “I didn’t want her on your radar.  I figured another set of eyes on Sarah couldn’t hurt, and I didn’t want you looking into her… she’s still a bit of a recluse.”

            “I get it,” Bucky lied.  He just wasn’t about to beat up on Steve while he was dealing with the holiday pressure.  “This situation… it’s like walking a tightrope. You’re just doing the best you can.”

            Steve looked back up at him, with his glistening crystal eyes. He sure was pretty.  “Thank you.” He motioned to the tissue. “For everything. I know we’re not exactly the easy assignment you were promised.”

            It was Bucky’s turn to laugh lightly at that.  “You can say that again. I’ve been in war zones that were less hostile.”

            Steve smiled tightly at that.  “We’re just trying to get by and stay safe.  We’ve been a little paranoid with everything.  I think that’s understandable.”

            “Sure,” Bucky said honestly.  “I’m not judging, Steve. It’d just be a lot easier for me to do my job if you were all a little more upfront with me.”

            Steve nodded.  “Yeah. Yeah, I’m gonna try to work on that.  Old habits.”

            “That’s fair,” Bucky said honestly.  He wasn’t sure how forthcoming he would have been if the roles had been reversed.

            “I’m sorry you couldn’t be with your family today,” Steve said quietly.  “It must suck that you have to deal with our family drama instead of being able to be with your own.”

            “It’s not so bad,” Bucky said truthfully.  “My sisters mostly see their spouses’ families.  I honestly can’t remember the last time I spent Thanksgiving with any of them.  I usually have to work.”

            Steve frowned at that.  “I’m sorry.”

            “Don’t be.”  He waved dismissively.  “I love my sisters, but we’re not all that close.  Occupational hazard. My work is… it’s a lot and it keeps me from seeing them as often as I’d like to.  I knew that when I signed on.”

            “You know you’re welcome to actually come downstairs and join us, right?  I meant what I said the other day. You’re not just some security detail. You’ve saved my kids’ lives.  I don’t take that lightly.” Steve smiled sweetly at him, and wow. Those big blue eyes, with that sweet smile… Stark never stood a goddamn chance.

            Bucky cleared his throat.  “That’s very nice of you--”

            “I mean it,” Steve said, his voice was soft and it was one of the first times that Bucky saw him like this… sweet.  “It’s the holidays. The three little monkeys are having a blast… we’d love it if you could join us.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah. Okay. I’ll be down in a little while.”

            Steve full on grinned at that, and it went right to Bucky’s ego.  “Great. I think the kids will really appreciate it. Thank you, Ser--Bucky.”

            “It’s no big deal,” Bucky said dismissively.  “Besides, I’m actually excited to taste your cooking.”

            Steve laughed at that, it was genuine and musical.  “Yeah well, it’s mostly Maria. She learned the recipe at one of her clubs.  Tony and I aren-- _weren’t_ really into cooking.  We ordered in mostly.”

            “Yeah, I can’t cook for shit,” Bucky said honestly.  “So the bar’s real low, Rogers.”

            Steve laughed again.  He looked down at his shoes for a moment and then peeked his eyes back up at Bucky.  “Hopefully I’ll exceed expectations, then.”

            “It’d be pretty hard not to,” Bucky said with a small smile back at Steve.  

            Steve motioned to the tissue in his hand.  “Thank you. For this, and for everything else.  I’m gonna head back out. I’ve got a ten year old to go check on.”

            “Yeah,” Bucky said.  “I hope she’s doing okay.”

            Steve let out a deep breath.  “Yeah, well… this time of year is gonna be hard.  They say the first one is always the worst.”

            “Yeah, well, the holidays will probably suck for a while,” Bucky said.  “I mean, how could they not? It’s hard for anyone, but kids… this time is supposed to be happy, and magical, and now it’s not.”

            “Well, the little ones are handling it better than I could have hoped.  I don’t think that they really understand,” Steve said quietly. “The finality of it, I mean.  The older three… they get it. And I get it, it’s not an easy thing to go through, but I can’t make it better, and I feel like the world’s worst father because I just want to make everything okay.”

            Bucky frowned.  “Well, I mean you are--making everything okay, I mean!  You’ve already made it okay for them to feel whatever they want today, and made sure that they had their own space.  You’ve given them a way to feel comfortable by being able to just hide out in their rooms if they need to. Most people would have went over to family and just had the kids put on a brave face, or not do the holiday at all.  I know that I was hard on you in the beginning, but I think you’re doing the best anyone could under the circumstances.”

            Steve let out a shaky breath.  “Thank you. That’s,” he cleared his throat, “that is very sweet of you to say.”

            Bucky shrugged.  “Well, it’s the truth.”

            Steve motioned to the door.  “I’m gonna go check on Maria.  Thank you… again.”

            “Glad I was able to help,” Bucky said as Steve smiled politely and walked out the door.

            Bucky did make good on his promise and go downstairs to join the festivities.  Clint was down there with Sarah, who seemed to be beaming. She must have been thrilled that she was being allowed to go back to school.

            “Hey,” Riley greeted him with a big smile. “Long time no see!  Steve told us you wouldn’t invite your family over!”

            Bucky waved dismissively at that.  “It was a nice offer, but believe me, this was for the best.”

            Riley made a face, but didn’t argue.  “I get it, families are hard. We’re going to Sam’s family for Christmas and… let’s just say I’m not looking forward to dealing with his mom and sister.”

            “That bad?”

            Riley shook his head.  “I mean they’re far better than my family, but I can only take so much of the comments before I wanna pull my hair out.  But they’re good to us. I really shouldn’t be complaining.”

            Before Bucky could press, Maria began making her way down the stairs.  Her dark eyes were red and puffy. It was clear that she had been crying since this morning.

            “Hey, sugar!” Riley said excitedly as he made his way over to her.  “Your Pops told me that he used your recipe for the turkey today. It smells amazing!  You’ll have to share it with me later. Sam’s mom always has something to say about my recipes.  I’d bet this one would shut her right up.”

            “Leave my mama out of this, Riles,” Sam called from the living room where he was watching the football game with Howie, Harrison, and the twins.

            Riley rolled his eyes playfully as Maria gave a pitiful laugh at that.  “Thanks, Uncle Riley.”

            Riley pulled her into his side as he began walking with her to the kitchen, talking about all the recipes that he tried to impress Sam’s mother with.  

            The rest of the evening passed uneventfully.  It was nice, being included. The kids were all able to get along, and for the first time, Bucky could see the appeal in a life like this.  He never thought that domesticity and children were something that he wanted. Still, sitting there at the table watching these kids be able to be normal human beings after everything they’d been through.  It was remarkable. Even Sarah impressed him. Sure he didn’t trust the girl, but she was managing to hold it together extraordinarily well considering it was her first time home since they’d buried her father.

            It wasn’t long before Jamie had to be brought up to bed--and Steve actually set him down in the nursery.  The twins and Harrison knocked out not long after that. They were watching the original _How the Grinch Stole Christmas_ when suddenly all three of them were snoring soundly on the couch.  It was endearing to actually see these kids be kids.

            Maria had made herself scarce after dinner.  Bucky didn’t blame her, and no one said anything about her excusing herself after barely picking at her meal.  The holidays sucked for families in this situation, especially kids.

            Howie and Sarah were clearly trying to be on their best behavior, but the tension between them was evident.  Steve was watching them closely the moment the other kids were out of sight. It was good to see that Bucky wasn’t the only one who noticed that things were strained between them.

            Riley and Sam were currently canoodling on the couch.  It was sweet. Bucky wondered if Tony and Steve were like that before he passed.  Were they affectionate? It was hard to picture Steve like that. He was usually reserved and to himself.  Bucky couldn’t envision him cuddling up with someone on the couch while they watched Christmas cartoons. He just couldn’t see it.  Then he couldn’t help but think maybe he didn’t _want_ to envision that.

 


	9. Chapter 8

_Status Report:  One Week Until Christmas_

The month leading up to Christmas had been relatively uneventful.  The twins and Harrison were just excited for Santa’s arrival. Maria just seemed glad to be getting a break from school, and being able to just hide in her bedroom during the break. Howie had been just focusing on trying to keep things exciting for the younger kids.  To Steve’s credit, the house was decorated and he was doing his best to keep the holiday spirit alive, but Christmas was definitely hitting him harder than Thanksgiving had.

            Bucky was in the kitchen, writing up his next status report.  He had been monitoring AJ’s bullying situation for the better part of the day.  He’d gone into the schools earlier in the month and installed some surveillance there.  It had actually proven to be more beneficial than he thought it would be. He saw that AJ wasn’t the only one having issues with bullies.  Howie was dealing with a conflict on his own. There was this kid that would not lay off him, and Bucky was tempted to show up at the kid’s house and scare the living shit out of him.  

            “Hey,” Howie said as he came up next to him in the kitchen.  “I have a favor to ask.”

            Bucky blinked.  Was this about the bully?  If so, that was impeccable timing, Bucky was just trying to figure out a way to alert the school to the situation.  “What’s going on?”

            “It’s our first Christmas without Dad, and I wanted to do something special for my pops.  I know that he’s doing his best to keep the holidays fun, and I just wanted to do something nice for him too,” Howie said nervously.

            Bucky felt himself deflate a little bit at that.  Howie still wasn’t looking out for himself, but for Steve instead.  It was infuriating. “Sure, what did you have in mind?”

            Howie shrugged.  “I saved up some money from back when I used to help Dad back at the workshop, and I wanted to get him something nice.  I just… I have no idea where to start, and I didn’t even get to take my road test yet, and I need some help here.”

            “I’d be happy to,” Bucky said lamely.  He had no idea what to get Steve fucking Rogers for Christmas.  He was the worst gift giver on God’s green Earth. His sister Rebecca had once told him to stick to gift cards.  Still, this was an opportunity to bond with Howie and maybe even get him talking about the bully. He had to grasp the opportunity.  He’d been with them for the better part of four months and this was the first time he had ever come to Bucky for anything--other than that first drop off scenario.

            Howie’s face flooded with relief.  “Thanks, Sarge. You really have no idea what a big help this is!  We can tell Pops that you’re helping me prepare for my road test or something.”

            Bucky stared at him.  “Somehow, I don’t think that he’d find that too comforting.  We’ll think of something to tell him. Maybe when he takes the kids to see Santa, we can break off.”

            Howie bit his tongue, considering the option.  “I just don’t know if that’ll give us enough time.  Besides, I want to see Jamie sit on Santa’s lap for the first time.  We didn’t do it last year because he was so little, and had the flu this time of year.”

            Bucky had to admit that it was pretty sweet.  “Um… I’ll figure something out. When did you want to go?”

            Howie shrugged.  “I don’t know. I mean Christmas is in a week.  I was hoping sooner rather than later.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Okay. We can tell him that I’m helping you with an issue at school.”  He paused, waiting to see if Howie was going to have a reaction. He didn’t, so Bucky continued.  “We’ll tell him that I wanted to look into a bully or something, and I needed your help identifying who this… little asshole is, so I can better take care of it.”

            Howie made a face.  “I don’t think that he’ll feel comfortable about that, and then he’ll try and take it to the school.  Principal Coulson does not need to worry about a fake bullying situation. You know my father, he’ll implode--”

            “You know that this isn’t made up,” Bucky deadpanned.

            Howie’s face paled a bit.  “I can handle myself.”

            “You don’t have to though,” Bucky said, putting a hand on his shoulder.  “Who is this kid?”

            “Just some tool.  He didn’t like me before everything that happened with Dad, and now he’s making it his mission to make my life a living hell,” Howie said.

            Bucky frowned.  “Why didn’t you say anything?”

            “Because involving the family bodyguard will surely help things,” Howie said sarcastically.

            “I can at least keep a record of these things.  I _do_ know how to keep a low profile.”  Bucky crossed his arms.

            “I can handle it,” Howie said.  “It’s barely gotten physical, and I can usually just shut him up with my test scores.  He can pretend that the only leg up I have on him is my father, but I’m _smarter_ than this asshole, and I’m _funnier_ than this asshole, and I’m _better looking_ than this asshole.  I don’t care what he says, and I _know_ that you know, if it ever got serious, I can handle myself.  Aunt Nat didn’t just train Sarah.”

            Bucky sighed.  He couldn’t exactly argue.  It almost reminded him of when he spoke to AJ about his bully.  These kids _knew_ _their worth._  It wasn’t something that most people grasped until they entered adulthood, and these kids had it.  It was so fucking impressive. “Promise me, that if it gets to a point where you feel unsafe you’ll come to me?”

            Howie nodded.  “Of course. I’m not trying to prove anything, it’s just that nothing this asshole does is gonna hurt worse than losing my dad.  Joke’s on him, I guess.”

            “Okay,” Bucky relented.  “Fine. I am gonna check in on this from time to time, though.”

            “Noted,” Howie said.  “Can we go Christmas shopping now?”

            Bucky glanced over to the steps.  Steve was up there, trying to soothe Jamie who had another tooth coming in.  The poor kid had been screaming for hours, and was running a fever.

            “Yeah, I’ll tell him that you’re coming with me to pick up Harrison from soccer, and we’ll go from there,” Bucky suggested.

            Howie shook his head.  “You know that he knows how long that usually takes   You’re acting like my father is a normal person, or something like that.”

            “I’ll handle it,” Bucky said with finality in his voice.  “I’ll tell him you’re helping me find some stuff for my sisters.”

            Howie teetered his head back and forth for a moment.  “I guess that works.”

            Bucky raised an eyebrow.  “It’s better than the other ideas, and he’s a little preoccupied right now as it is.”

            “Fine.  Can you tell him?  It’ll be less suspicious,” Howie suggested.

            Bucky groaned as he made his way over the steps.  “Fine, but remember, I am doing this as a favor to you!”

            “Yeah, yeah,” Howie said dismissively.

            Bucky skipped up the steps to the second floor.  They kids had been in their own bedrooms more and more frequently as of late, and it was actually a pretty big step for them.  

            Bucky entered the nursery.  Steve was bouncing Jamie in his arms.  Jamie just kept screaming. “Pa, ow! Owie, Pa!”

            “I know, baby,” Steve said desperately.  “I know it hurts, love.”

            “Mouth!  Papa, hurts!” Jamie was shrieking, his blonde head of hair resting on Steve’s shoulder.

            “Hey,” Bucky said loudly, trying to be audible over the screaming baby.

            Steve turned to face him.  “Everything okay?”

            “Howie suggested helping me pick out some presents for my sisters, and I was gonna take him with me to the stores.  That okay? If you need help, we can go another day,” Bucky said as Steve was still hopping up and down with Jamie.

            “It’s fine,” Steve sighed.  “Once I get Jamie down for a bit, it should be smooth sailing.  I’m just gonna make some homemade pizza, so that’ll be easy. That Pillsbury dough is a lifesaver.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Well, if you want us to pick something up on our way back, just let us know.”

            “Thanks,” Steve motioned to the crying baby in his arms.  “He might not ever stop crying.”

            “The teething-ring’s not working?” Bucky asked.

            Steve rolled his eyes.  “He threw it under the dresser twenty minutes ago.”

            Bucky laughed in disbelief as he bent down to pick up the teething-ring.  “I’ll put it in the sink.”

            “Thanks,” Steve said.  “And don’t let Howie go too crazy at the mall.  He’s the kid.”

            “I don’t know what you’re talking about?” Bucky lied.

            Steve gave him a look.  “You’ve never mentioned your sisters unless one of us bring them up.  There’s no way that you’d ask my sixteen-year-old to help you shop for them.  Get me something nice, but not too nice. He’s still the kid.”

            “Someone thinks very highly of himself,” Bucky teased.  “I don’t know why you think this is about you, I have three lovely sisters that like presents.”

            Steve laughed and Jamie began to quiet down a little bit.  “That’ll be the baby aspirin.”

            “Thank god for that.” Bucky smiled.

            Steve kissed the top of Jamie’s head sweetly.  “I like ties.”

            “Kinky, Rogers,” Bucky teased as he made his way to the door.

            “I’ll have you know, I used to help out at Tony’s office all the time,” Steve said as he sat down on the rocking chair with Jamie.  “I liked the ties, what can I say?”

            “Yeah?” Bucky asked.  “I can’t picture you in a button down with a tie.  Were the dress shirts two sizes too small too, or do the buttons pop off if you do that?”

            Steve barked at that.  “They are _not_ two sizes too small.”

            Bucky shrugged.  “They are definitely not the right size.  Maybe we’ll get you shirts that fit for Christmas… so you can see the difference.”

            Steve shook his head and gave a laugh.  It was the first time that Bucky had heard Steve laugh since Thanksgiving.  Christmas had taken its toll on this family, and Bucky understood. When his parents passed, he didn’t want to celebrate anything and he was an adult.  “Seriously, less is more with me.”

            “Good to know,” Bucky said.  “We’re still not shopping for you.”

            Steve made a little face.  “Okay, whatever you say. Try and let him have some fun.  I worry about him.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah, I’ll do what I can.”

            “Thank you,” Steve said, seemingly genuine.  “This is gonna be a rough week.”

            Bucky sighed.  “You’ll get through it.”  He walked over to the door.  “You’ll all get through it, and then you’ve got like a year before you have to suffer through it again.”

            Steve made a face at that.  “Kids shouldn’t have to _‘suffer’_ during Christmas time.”

            “No, they shouldn’t,” Bucky agreed.  “But yours will. Don’t be surprised if the Santa magic wears off a little too soon.  The younger ones get it a little more than you’d think.”

            Steve was rubbing circles into Jamie’s back as the toddler’s eyes were getting heavy.  “I know they do. I kind of overcompensated this year. I can’t get them Tony so… I kind of got them everything else.”

            “I’d do the same thing,” Bucky said honestly.  “I mean, they’re kids. If you can make this a little easier for them, why wouldn’t you?  Candy and presents are excellent distractions.”

            Steve smiled sadly at that.  “Yeah. I’m getting good with the distractions.  This is gonna be hard, though. It’s just us, unless you’ve reconsidered inviting your family.”

            “I think this is all some plot to get embarrassing stories out of my sisters,” Bucky teased lightly.  “In all seriousness, it’s just not professional, and I wouldn’t want to put them or any of you in an unsafe situation as a result.”

            “I appreciate and respect that,” Steve said, looking down at Jamie.

            Bucky motioned to the door with his head.  “We won’t be gone long.”

            Steve gave a half shrug.  “Take all the time he needs.  I’m just glad he’s getting out of the house.”

            “Copy that,” Bucky said as he walked out of the nursery and gently closed the door behind him.

            He made his way back down the steps.  Howie was already waiting for him at the front door with his jacket on.  “Did he suspect anything?”

            Bucky lied, shaking his head.  “He doesn’t suspect a thing.”

            Howie let out a sigh of relief.  “Great! Let’s get going!”

_Status Report: Christmas Day_

            Bucky woke up at four in the morning to the sounds of excited shrieks coming from the first floor.  As exhausted as he was, he had to admit that it was also… electric to hear the young kids getting so excited and believing in magic.  He hadn’t experienced anything like that since he was growing up with his sisters.

            As if on cue, his door creaked open and he heard the pitter patter of feet race around his bedroom.  He kept his eyes closed, playing along as he felt three little bodies jump on top of the bed.

            “Mr. Bucky!” Harrison whispered.  “Are you awake?”

            Bucky yawned and cracked his eyes opened for show.  “Everything okay?”

            “Someone broke in!” Talia tried to suppress a giggle, and she put her hand over her mouth.

            Bucky gasped theatrically.  “What? Who got through my security system?”

            AJ was full on laughing now.  “Santa! Sarge, Santa got through your security!”

            “Santa Claus?” Bucky said skeptically.  “I thought I Santa proofed the house!”

            The three kids were laughing hysterically at that.  “Mr. Bucky, Santa’s magic. It’s okay, though, he didn’t take Daddy’s gizmos.”

            That caught his attention.  “That’s good to know. Maybe later on, you can show me where the gizmos are, so I can make sure that none of the elves got any silly ideas and tried to copy them.”

            Harrison nodded.  “Presents first?”

            “Of course!” Bucky exclaimed.  “We can’t have Christmas without seeing what Santa brought first!”

            “Come on!” Talia said excitedly as she hopped down from the bed.  “Last one down there gets coal!”

            Bucky shook his head as he followed after the kids.  When he got down the steps, he saw that the others were already awake.  Howie looked so tired that he might fall over and fall asleep at any moment.  Sarah was sitting there with her hair pulled back in a tight bun. Her make-up was still thrown on, and that said more than Bucky thought it could.  She really must not have felt comfortable there. Who the hell gets woken up at 4am on Christmas morning and puts on a face of makeup before coming over to the tree?

            Steve was sitting there with his phone in one hand, ready for pictures and he was using the other hand to keep Jamie steady on his lap.  Jamie looked completely exhausted, and confused. He probably didn’t remember anything from his first Christmas, so this was likely the first Christmas he was aware of, even if it was just vaguely.

            Maria was next to Steve.  Her eyes were wide as she looked at the tree, and it was honestly a nice change of pace to her usually glum expression that she’d been sporting.

            “Merry Christmas,” Barton called to him from where he was sulking by the fireplace.  

            “Good morning,” Bucky said, trying very hard not to seem like the walking dead.  “Wow, Santa really did come.”

            The display under the tree was unlike anything that Bucky had ever seen.  Steve wasn’t kidding, he had really went all out. There were enough boxes under the tree that it looked like a festive Hooverville.  No wonder the kids were so mind-blown. This was the Christmas from the movies that kids dreamed of.

            “All right,” Steve put Jamie down, who waddled after Steve as he went over to the tree.  “I will pass these out. Let’s try and take it easy and look at everything. There are a lot of presents here, so let’s not go too crazy and try to take our time.”

            Bucky had to fight the urge to laugh.  He was telling kids to take it easy on Christmas.  Was it his first day?

            Overall, it took almost an hour to hand out all the presents, and get them open.  Steve must have single-handedly bought out an entire toy store, because that was the only logical explanation for all of these presents.  Even Maria, couldn’t help from smiling at the two beautiful American Girl dolls that “Santa” had brought her for Christmas. Sarah and Howie had gotten their fair share of gifts too, and everyone seemed to be having a lovely holiday.  Steve’s plan was working--distracting was going quite the long way.

            Howie handed Steve the gift that the two of them had picked out for him.  They had wound up going with a yoga mat and video. It was something that was designed for parents to do with babies or something.  It wasn’t exactly a winner, but Steve acted like Howie had just found a way to give him the moon and the stars.

            “This is incredible!” Steve said excitedly clutching the yoga mat.  “I’ve been meaning to start working out again, and this is a great way to do it with Jamie!”

            Bucky didn’t dare look over there at risk of laughing.  Somehow, he could actually picture Steve trying to get Jamie to do yoga with him, and he just could not see it working out the way that Steve wanted it to.  Still it would be an adventure for them either way.

Jamie was currently playing with the wrapping paper that was being torn off, rather than paying any attention to the mountain of gifts that Steve had gotten for him.  Steve just watched on endearingly. It was clear that he didn’t expect the little one to actually get it this year. Maybe next time.

            “Mr. Bucky!” Harrison exclaimed from over by the tree.  “Mr. Bucky, look! Santa brought something for you! You too, Mr. Clint!”

            Sarah looked over her shoulder and gave Clint a knowing smile.  Bucky had to admit that it was sweet that the family would do something like that.  It wasn’t as if they were there under the best of circumstances.

            Clint and Bucky walked over to the tree to see that there were actually a few gifts for them underneath it.  It was very sweet, and very much unnecessary. The first set that he opened were these lovely home crafts that the kids made, and Bucky had to admit that his heart swelled at those. God, he was in trouble!  These finger paintings were something that he wanted to cherish and keep close to him forever. He was gonna be doomed if he ever had kids of his own.

            Then he got to the last gift.  He opened it to see a kids spy kit, and Barton had the same one.

            Steve cleared his throat.  “Harrison and the twins picked that out.  I wanted to go with something different, but they insisted.”

            Bucky full on grinned at that.  It was adorable _and_ thoughtful.  He definitely wasn’t expecting that.  “Wow! How did you guys know that I needed one of these?”

            Harrison gasped.  “See, Pa! I _told_ you!”

            Steve nodded and put his hands up defensively.  “I see that. You were right. Who knows what I was thinking?”

            “Pa wanted to get you something boring like _a book_!” AJ said with disgust.  “We told him you’d like this way better.”

            Clint laughed at that.  “Barnes and I were just talking about how we needed new equipment.  Thanks for this.”

            Maria even giggled at that.  “You guys did good.”

            “We give the best presents!” Harrison said proudly, crossing his arms in triumph.  

            Steve ruffled his hair.  “Don’t let it get to your head, kiddo.”

            “But look!” AJ handed both Bucky and Clint two smaller boxes that were hiding.  “Santa brought you something too!”

            “Wow,” Steve said, trying to hold back a smile.  “You must have been on the nice list this year.”

            Bucky slowly opened the package to see a very nice, very expensive watch staring back at him.  He gaped at it. He would not have been able to afford his on his own. It was wildly unnecessary and extravagant.

            Clint let out a low whistle.  “This is…”

            “Too much,” Bucky finished for him, not looking up from the watch.

            “Guess you’ll have to thank Santa Claus then,” Sarah said as she took a sip from her hot cocoa.  “You must have been real nice this year.”

            Bucky looked back at Steve dumbfounded.  He didn’t even have words. This was the nicest gift he’d ever received from anyone.

            Steve just nodded along with Sarah.  “Yeah, the two of you have done so much just for us.  I’m sure Santa just wanted you to know how much it meant to all of us.”

            Bucky couldn’t even respond.  His eyes just would not leave the gorgeous watch.  It was incredible and completely over the top. He felt like an idiot for the stupid yoga mat thing now.

            He was snapped out of his thoughts by Talia, who was glancing under the tree for more gifts.  

            Steve frowned.  “Tal, I’m pretty sure you opened everything.  C’mon, let’s not get spoiled. You got a lot of great presents this year!  I’m sure there’s a lot of kids that didn’t get half as much as you did.”

            She didn’t seem to hear him.  She backed away from the tree and turned back.  She glanced down the hall that led to the studies and countless of unused office rooms.  “I bet Santa hid it there!” She raced off down the hall, and Steve rolled his eyes.

            “Here we go.”  Steve followed after her.  “Tal! I’m pretty sure you got everything, honey!  Let’s not ruin Christmas because you didn’t get _one_ present that you asked for.”

            The others went after Steve too, except for Sarah and Clint, who stayed in the living room with Jamie, who was still just playing with the wrapping paper.

            Talia went into one of the office spaces that Stark used to use as a makeshift workshop when he was home.  Bucky had examined it thoroughly when he had first arrived. Talia was looking under the desk and then she just stopped and her face fell.  “I don’t understand!” She stomped her foot.

            “Talia,” Steve said warningly.  “I will not have a brat attack today.  You had a very nice Christmas. Santa was _very_ good to you.  Let’s be grateful, otherwise we can donate all these toys to kids who will appreciate them.”

            She turned back to face him.  Her face was red and blotchy. “I just thought… I asked Santa if we could see Daddy for Christmas.  I put it in my letter and he’s magic… I just wanted to see Daddy on Christmas.”

            Steve’s face fell at that, and Maria raced out of the room immediately.  This was definitely not what any of them were expecting.

            “Baby, that’s not…” Steve cleared his throat.  He knelt down next to her on the ground. “Princess, as much as I would love to tell you that Santa can do anything, his magic only does so much.  He’s not God, Talia. He can only bring us what the elves build and...” Steve’s voice cracked. “Your dad was one of a kind. No elf can make him. Even if they could, I think you and I both know that it wouldn’t exactly be the same.”

            Howie stepped forward and began rubbing Talia’s back soothingly.  “Santa’s magic makes reindeer fly and he can sneak into houses, but Pops is right.  He can’t bring people back to life like that. That’s more than just magic, Talia. That’s something not even Harry Potter can do without the resurrection stone, and Santa Claus is no Harry Potter.”

            She nodded and it was clear that she was trying not to cry.  She was trying to be brave.

            “It’s okay to be upset,” Steve said after a minute.  “We all miss him, and we all wish he could be here, especially on a day like today.”

            She was looking down at her shoes.  Bucky could see that her eyes were filled with tears, but she was willing herself not to cry.  She was showing incredible restraint for a six year old who’d just realized that even Santa Claus couldn’t bring her father back to her.

            “How about I make you some hot cocoa?  We can play with any of the toys that you want, and we’ll have cookies for breakfast.  It’s Christmas… we can break the rules a little bit today,” Steve said softly as he took one of Talia’s hands in his own.

            She shook her head and pulled her hand away.  “May I be excused please?”

            Steve sighed and kissed the top of her head sweetly.  “Of course. Did you want any breakfast or--”

            “I think I want to lay down.  I’m not feeling so good.” She still would not meet his eyes, and Bucky could feel his heart breaking for her.

            “Okay,” Steve said with a nod.  “If you need me, I’ll be down here.”

            She didn’t say anything, she just darted out of the room without a second glance.

            AJ and Harrison were just standing there, confused.  Steve stared at them. “I…”

            “Okay.” Howie clapped loudly.  “Let’s break open some of those toys!”

            Harrison shook his head, tears were openly flowing from his eyes.  He was pouting and it was clear that he was doing his best to try and stop from crying, he just couldn’t do it.  

            “I know,” Steve said as he stood up and walked over to Harrison.  He scooped him up and kissed his cheek. “I miss him too, bud.”

            AJ grasped onto Steve’s free side tightly as he was crying into his father’s shirt.  He was clinging to Steve for dear life, like he was afraid that Steve would disintegrate if he let go.

            Howie cleared his throat.  “Excuse me.” He walked out of the room, and Bucky was almost certain that he was going to head up to his own bedroom.  

            Bucky just stood there staring as Steve tried his best to comfort the two little boys in his arms.  He didn’t have anything to say. He just watched. This was on him. He didn’t save Stark. He was the reason that this family was in pain.

            Bucky quietly slipped out of the room.  This was a personal moment, and he was intruding on it.  He walked into the living room and Sarah was sobbing into Clint’s chest.  She clearly must have gotten the memo.

            “Hey, it’s okay, kid,” Clint said awkwardly as he patted her back.  

            Bucky made eye contact and shook his head.  It was hard to imagine that this was the same day that had started with such joy and excitement merely an hour prior.  

            Bucky cleared his throat and Sarah immediately detached herself from Clint and wiped her face.  “Oh,” she relaxed, still crying when she saw that it was Bucky. “I didn’t want Papa to see.” She sniffled and made her way over to the steps.  “I should go check on my sisters… and Howie. I knew this morning was just too good to be true.”

            Jamie watched her in confusion as she made her way up the steps.  He let go of the wrapping paper that he was demolishing in his hand and went over to Bucky.  “Buck, up!”

            Bucky picked the toddler up and took a seat on the couch with him.  Jamie rested his head on Bucky’s shoulder. The poor thing must have been exhausted.  He was certain that he woke up from all the noise that the other kids made that morning rather than on his own.  It was a miracle that he wasn’t pitching a fit.

            After about fifteen minutes, Steve and the other two kids came back into the living room.  Harrison and AJ only stayed there for about a minute before they headed up the steps to their own bedrooms.  The moment they were out of sight, Steve leaned up against the wall and let himself slowly sink down to the floor.  He put his head in his hands and just sobbed.

            Jamie squirmed out of Bucky’s grasp and waddled over to Steve.  Jamie tapped Steve’s knee with his tiny fist, and looked back to Bucky for a moment.

            Steve sniffed as he looked up to see Jamie.  “Oh, baby,” Steve said sadly. “I didn’t mean to upset you--”

            Jamie just touched Steve’s face softly and frowned.  He pouted and it was clear that he did not like seeing Steve this way.  “Pa, sad?”

            Steve kissed Jamie’s tiny hand and shook his head.  “Pa’s okay. I’m sorry. I thought you were upstairs with Sarah.”

            “Sah?” He asked as he looked around to see if Sarah had just been hiding this entire time.

            “Are you sleepy, little one?” Steve asked, tears still freely flowing from his eyes.  

            “Yah.  Sleepy,” Jamie said and he even yawned for good measure.  

            Steve nodded.

            “I can put him down,” Clint said standing up from the couch.  “I used to be able to get my kids to sleep in record time.”

            Steve blinked.  “I didn’t realize you had children.  I’m sorry you couldn’t be with them today.”

            Clint smiled tightly at that.  “We have more in common than you’d think, Captain--”

            “Steve is fine,” Steve interrupted, he clearly still hated being called Captain.

            Clint nodded.  “Anyway, I can put the little guy to bed.  I think you’ve had an eventful enough Christmas.”

            “That’s not necessary--”

            “I’d be happy to do it,” Clint said.  His tone made it clear that there was no point in arguing with him.

            “Thank you,” Steve relented.

            Clint took Jamie’s hand and led him up the steps.  It was a sweet sight to see--Jamie struggling to climb the steps while Clint patiently waited.

            “I didn’t know he had a family,” Steve said after a few minutes of silence.  “I should have extended an invitation--”

            “He doesn’t,” Bucky stopped him.  “Not anymore.”

            Steve’s face fell.  “No. Not the whole family.”

            Bucky nodded.  “There was an accident.  He was overseas at the time.  Let’s just say there’s a reason I picked him for this.  I knew he’d take it seriously, like me. It’s not something either of us would take lightly.”

            “He must think so little of me,” Steve said quietly.  “I can barely keep it together and I still have my kids--”

            “He doesn’t think anything,” Bucky said honestly.  “He just… he understands. He understands more than I could.”

            Steve looked back down, scratching the back of his neck.  His thoughts were far away from Bucky now, that much was evident.  Bucky took a deep breath as he stood up off the couch and walked over to where Steve was on the floor.  He sat down next to him so that their shoulders were touching.

            “None of us think anything, Steve,” Bucky said.  “For what it’s worth, this was kind of the best case scenario for the first Christmas without Tony.  You got a good hour or so out of them, and managed to maintain the Santa myth, _and_ you didn’t break down until they were out of sight.”  Bucky bumped their shoulders playfully. “You did good, Rogers.”

            Steve let out a pitiful laugh as he leaned back against Bucky slightly.  “You don’t have to try to make me feel better. This is gonna suck for a while.  I guess I was just hoping that since we’d been in a good routine lately that this would be easier.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah well, the holidays are weird to begin with, nevermind going through what you’re going through.”

            Steve raised his eyebrows slightly at that.  “The holidays are not supposed to be weird for kids.”

            Bucky paused.  Steve wasn’t wrong.  Adulthood was when family and holidays got complicated.  For kids, Christmas was flying reindeer and magic elves. It wasn’t fair that they had to grow up so fast.  “I’m really sorry, Steve. I don’t know if I’ve said that before, but--”

            “What?” Steve cut him off.  “What are you talking about?”

            “It’s my fault that Tony--”

            “Okay.” Steve shook his head and stood up.  He sounded tense. “I’m only gonna do this once, and then we’re not gonna do this _ever_ again!”

            Bucky stood up slowly, unsure of where this was going.  “Okay...”

            “Did you kill Tony?” Steve crossed his arms, his brow furrowed.  

            “What?”

            “Answer the question.” Steve said flatly.

            “Of course I didn’t kill--” Bucky began.

            Steve put his hand up, silencing him.  “Did you know that the operation was compromised?”

            Bucky gave him a look.  “No, I didn’t--”

            “Did you have _any_ indication that the operation might go south and that Tony was in danger?” Steve asked curtly.

            Bucky shook his head.  “The whole op seemed legit.”

            “Then it is not your fault,” Steve said shortly.  “I appreciate what you’re trying to do, but I can’t help you, Sergeant.  I can’t be strong for my kids, try to heal, grieve my husband _and_ fix your guilt.”

            “I wasn’t trying to--”

            “I can’t… if this is too much for you, then I’m sorry, but…” Steve’s voice trailed off.  “I can’t hold your hand too. I know that you have done so much for me and my kids, but--”

            “Don’t.  No, I didn’t mean… I wasn’t trying to put that on you,” Bucky said sincerely.  “I am sorry, Steve. I’m sorry that you’re all going through this, and I’m sorry that I wasn’t able to save Tony.  I wasn’t looking for you to… absolve me of my guilt. I’m gonna live with this for as long as I live. I know we can’t save everyone, but we don’t usually get charged with looking after the families of the people we’ve failed.”

            Steve nodded.  He motioned to the stairs.  “I’ve got some kids to check up on.  It’s probably gonna be a quiet day, so if you wanna take a nap or something… I mean the sun’s not even out yet.”

            “If you need anything--”

            “I’ll know where to find you,” Steve said coldly as he turned away from Bucky and made his way up the steps.

            Bucky groaned as he put his hands on his forehead.  It was always two steps forward, one step back with Steve.  Everytime he thought that he was making headway, Bucky always managed to throw a wrench in things.

 

 


	10. Chapter 9

_Mission Report: One Month After Christmas_

            Things around the house had calmed down after the holidays.  Steve had reached out to Sam right after the holiday for recommendations for a grief counselor.  It was definitely a step in the right direction. Most of the kids didn’t really understand why they had to go talk to someone once a week, but the older ones _hated_  it.  

            _The oldest son and Rogers are fighting.  Arguments have become increasingly frequent._

            Howie, to Bucky’s surprise, tried to get out of going each and every week.  They were currently having a screaming match upstairs. The other kids were downstairs, including Sarah who was mostly just attending for solidarity.  The screaming was echoing throughout the house.

            “Why’s Howie so mad?” Harrison asked as they heard a door slam.

            “He doesn’t like going to the doctor,” Maria said as she brushed her doll’s hair, keeping it just right.

            “But Dr. M is so nice,” AJ said.  “She lets us play with toys and stuff.”

            Sarah sighed as she was playing peek-a-boo with Jamie.  “Well, going to the doctor can be hard sometimes.”

            “What’s hard is all the fighting,” Talia huffed.  “It hurts my ears and then Pa and Howie are always in a bad mood for the rest of the day.”

            There was another door slam followed by footsteps stomping down the steps.  Someone was headed in their direction. Howie came downstairs first. He was still seething.  His jaw was clenched and he looked as though he wanted to punch the wall.

            Steve followed down the steps with the diaper bag a few moments later.  He didn’t look at Howie as he took Jamie from Sarah. “Anyone need to use the bathroom before we go?”

            Silence.  Sarah had already asked that question when the first set of kids had come down to get ready almost twenty minutes prior.

            Steve nodded.  “Let’s go.”

_Status Report: February 14th_

_Valentine's Day.  Rogers is hiding out in the master._

            “I want to watch _Enchanted_!” Talia shrieked as she and AJ fought over the remote control.

            “No way!  Just because it’s Valentine's Day, doesn’t mean we have to watch a fairy tale!” AJ yelled as he tackled her trying to grasp the remote from her hands.

            Howie groaned as he separated the twins, and grabbed the remote from Talia.  He held it up in the air. “I win. We’re watching _Hercules_.  You get both romance _and_ monster fighting.  It’s a compromise!”  
            That seemed to satisfy them because once the movie started, they stopped fighting.  It was a nice change from all the yelling. Jamie began clapping as the movie started.  At least this was a popular choice.

            Maria was in the kitchen, baking heart shaped cookies with Harrison.  She was doing this new thing where she tried to distract herself from being sad, so she would work on a different project everyday.  It seemed to be working, as she hadn’t had a full breakdown in a while.

            “Hey, Bucky,” she called him from the kitchen.  “Can you give me a hand here?”

            Bucky walked into the kitchen, which looked like a bomb went off.  He let out a low whistle. “What happened here?”

            Maria glanced sideways at Harrison who was covered head to toe in flour.  “Baking can be messy.”

            Harrison laughed.  “Mr. Bucky, we should make flour angels on the floor!”

            “I don’t think your father would appreciate that very much,” Bucky said honestly.

            “Definitely not,” Maria agreed.  “Can you help me put these in the oven? Pa’s rules.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah, no problem.  Do you guys usually bake cookies on Valentine's Day?”

            Maria’s face fell.  “Um… no. Dad was really big into Valentine’s Day.  He used to do all this crazy stuff for Pa… Papa used to pretend like he didn’t care either way about Valentine’s Day, but we all knew that he loved it when Dad used to go crazy.  Last year, Dad arranged this whole firework show right by the beach. We had this really nice picnic and we just sat by the water and watched the show. The year before that, Dad took us to this acrobat show, and… it was just a big deal for them.  I can’t do anything like that, but I can make sure that Pa has cookies.”

            “Pa likes cookies!” Harrison said excitedly.

            “He does,” Maria agreed.  “He just doesn’t usually eat them because he’s a health nut.  Still, I think today is a good day to bend the rules a little bit.”

            Harrison nodded.  “We can FaceTime Sarah too!”

            Maria shrugged.  “Sarah might be busy tonight.  She always has a date on Valentine’s Day.”

            “We can try!” Harrison said.  “I miss Sarah.”

            Maria frowned at that.  “Yeah. I miss her too. It’d be nice to have her here today.”

            “Who’s your Valentine, Mr. Bucky?” Harrison asked with a big grin.  “Maria said she’d be my Valentine this year.”

            She cracked a smile at that.  “How could I say no to a face that cute?”

            “I don’t have one this year,” Bucky said, unsure how else to answer.  “I’ve been kind of a lone wolf for a while now.”

            Harrison frowned and crossed his arms.  “Everyone should have a Valentine!”

            Bucky shrugged.  “I don’t know about _‘everyone_.’  There are lots of people who don’t have a Valentine.  Besides, I’m working--”

            They were interrupted by someone clearing their voice from the entryway.  Bucky looked over to see Steve standing there. He looked like a mess. His hair was all over the place, his eyes were red and puffy, and his face was paler than usual.  

            “Papa!” Harrison said with a big grin as he raced over to Steve and hugged him tightly.  “I got so many valentines at school today! Miss Peggy got us all candy too! I saved your favorites!  Howie said you might be sad today because Daddy used to be your Valentine.” The little boy was blabbering--there was no end in sight and Steve definitely was only registering a fraction of what Harrison was saying.  “I know Maria is my Valentine, but I can have two! I can be your Valentine or Mr. Bucky! Mr. Bucky doesn’t have a Valentine!”

            Steve gave Harrison a small smile.  “Just because your dad is in heaven doesn’t mean he can’t still be my valentine.”

            Harrison frowned.  “But--”

            “What happened in here?” Steve asked, hastily changing the subject.  His face looked horrified. “This room is a mess.”

            “It’s a surprise,” Harrison said becoming serious.  “We can’t ruin the surprise, Pa.”

            Steve raised an eyebrow.  “But you have no problem ruining my kitchen?”

            “I’ll help them clean it up,” Bucky suggested politely.

            “He said ‘help,’” Steve said warningly.  “I will make sure that Bucky didn’t do the entire job.  This isn’t his mess, he better not be stuck cleaning it up!”

            “We’ll take care of it, Papa,” Maria said genuinely.  Bucky didn’t doubt her, she seemed to be pretty good at keeping things organized.

            Steve nodded.  “Then I guess I’ll leave you to it.  I heard _Hercules_ is on. Hopefully, this room will be clean before the movie ends.”

            Harrison gasped.  “I _love Hercules_!”

            “Then you’d better get cleaning,” Steve said.  He turned back to Bucky. “Thank you. You do _not_ need to help them.”

            Bucky shrugged.  “It’s not big deal.  Besides, it’s kept them pretty happy.”

            Steve nodded.  “At least it’s not Christmas.”

            “Not for them,” Bucky muttered.

            Steve made a dismissive grunt.  “I’m fine.”

            “If you say so,” Bucky said.  “If you want some time to yourself, I can handle stuff down here.”

            Steve nodded.  “Yeah, I don’t think being by myself is a good idea right now.”

            “You okay?” Bucky asked.  “I know it’s a dumb question, but if you think you might not be safe--”

            “It’s not like that,” Steve said, shaking his head.  “I just want to be with my kids right now.”

            “If you change your mind--”

            “Thank you,” Steve said sadly.  “Tony just _really_ loved Valentine’s Day, and I _really_ loved him.  It just… I feel it a little more today.”

            “That makes sense,” Bucky said honestly.  “Seriously, let me know if there’s anything I can do.”

            Steve smiled sadly at that.  “Make sure they don’t do any permanent damage to my kitchen?”

            “I think I can manage that,” Bucky said with a nod.

            “Thank you,” Steve said with a sniff as he headed out of the kitchen.

 

 


	11. Chapter 10

_Status Report: Second Week of March_

            Bucky was reading over Barton’s status reports in the living room.  Jamie was sitting next to him on the couch watching _Bubble Guppies_.  He was entranced as the weird little merpeople got into all sorts of shenanigans.  It was still a welcome change from Harrison’s _Paw Patrol_.

            The other kids were at school, and Steve was in the kitchen cleaning up the mess from breakfast that he had made for the older kids.  He was getting better at helping them get ready in the mornings, and was even taking over some of the pickups and drop offs during the week.  It was a step in the right direction. Slow and steady.

            Barton’s report was interesting.  He’d stayed true to their agreement.  He was constantly with Sarah and his reports were written in code.  Albeit, not the best code, but it made Barton feel better. From what Bucky gathered from this report, Sarah was branching out and becoming more social.  Bucky still didn’t trust her as far as he could throw her, but it was good that Sarah was adjusting.

            Steve came into the living room and sat down on Bucky’s other side.  “Do we have anything important on the itinerary today?”

            Bucky shook his head.  “No, nothing on tap for today.  Why?”

            Steve shrugged.  “Just wondering. I was thinking of doing something for dinner tonight.  I wanted to make sure that it didn’t conflict with anything.”

            Bucky tensed.  “Um… no. What brought this on?”

            Steve laughed, and Bucky _hated_ how it still sounded like fucking music to his ears.  “I can’t want to take my kids out for a meal? Not everything is a big conspiracy.  If you don’t think it’s a good idea, then we won’t do it.”

            Bucky looked at him oddly.  “No, that’s fine. You just have been really big about sticking to your routines.  Isn’t that what Dr. Maximoff has been stressing?”

            Steve rolled his eyes.  “That doesn’t mean we can’t treat ourselves every now and again.  Besides, it’s safe. No holidays or anniversaries.”

            “Okay,” Bucky said.  “If you want privacy, I can monitor from the parking lot, but I’d rather be--”

            “Stop it,” Steve said, giving him a look.  “You’re joining us.”

            Bucky stared at him.  He’d only ever actually sat and ate with them during Thanksgiving and Christmas.  “Are you… Is everything all right?”

            “What is that supposed to mean?” Steve teased.  It was strange. Bucky didn’t know what to think when Steve got like this.  He hadn’t been this friendly since before Christmas.        

            “It means that this is a first,” Bucky said candidly.  “I just… you’re catching me off guard.”

            Steve smiled to himself and looked down for a moment.  He licked his lips absentmindedly, and Bucky could have sworn it happened in slow motion.  Why did Stark have to like such pretty things? It was making it very hard for Bucky to stay objective.  “I’m just trying to extend an olive branch. I know Christmas got… intense, and I know I’m to blame for that.  It doesn’t change the fact that you’re looking after my family… and me, and I appreciate that. We’d be honored if you’d join us tonight.”

            Bucky nodded slowly.  “It’s not necessary, but… sure, if that’s what you want.”

            Steve grinned, his eyes lighting up, and goddamn.  It was easy to forget how exceptional Steve looked when he was masking his face behind tears and sadness.  When Steve smiled, he looked like he belonged in an art museum. “The kids are gonna be so excited, Harrison especially.  I think he’s idolizing you a little bit. The cool soldier keeping us safe from the bad guys. Poor kid doesn’t stand a chance.”  
            Harrison didn’t stand a chance?  How the hell was Bucky supposed to stand a chance when Stark’s transcendent beauty of a widower was singing his praises?

“How’s he doing in school?”  He changed the subject. “I know Peggy was speaking highly of his work a few weeks ago.”

            Steve smiled proudly at that.  “Yeah, he’s doing great. I was a little worried.  Tony was the one who used to help them with school and everything.  I’m glad that it doesn’t seem to have negatively impacted him.”

            “Not to seem cynical or anything,” Bucky said cautiously.  “But isn’t Harrison in preschool? I’m sure you’d be able to handle that with or without Tony.  I think it’ll probably be more complicated as they get older.”

            Steve laughed.  “No, of course. I wasn’t worried about Miss Peggy’s advanced color lessons.  Tony used to be really into all those developmental books and would do play lessons at home to make sure they were the best they could be.  I just don’t have the energy to do that.”

            “To be fair, I don’t think most parents have the time or energy to do that.  I mean it’s wonderful, but I don’t think I could do that either, and I do not have _any_ kids nevermind seven,” Bucky said honestly.

            Steve laughed again and it sounded like its own symphony.  “Tony was really into all this. He _loved_ having a family.  Everyone thought that I was the one who wanted all the kids, and don’t get me wrong, I was more than happy to have any number of children, but it was all Tony.  Tony was the one who found all the surrogates and the doctors and he even looked into the best school districts before we bought the house… Tony loved having a family.  He wasn’t that close to his dad, and he didn’t want our kids to have that experience. Jamie isn’t even gonna know him, and Harrison and the twins will only have fleeting memories.  He didn’t want that.”

            Bucky shook his head.  “I’m sorry about that.”  He wasn’t really sure what else to say.  He knew that Steve was right. Tony talked about his kids constantly.  He really loved all of them, and anyone who had spoken to him for more than two minutes could know that.  

            Steve shrugged.  “It’s something that I’m gonna have to get used to.  I know that I should feel lucky. I was with Tony for twenty three years.  A lot of people have had a lot less, but I just think about the fact that my kids are going to have to go the rest of their lives without him and I get so angry.  If I wasn’t supposed to have him forever, then fine, but my kids… they miss their dad.”

            Bucky just looked down at his shoes.  He wasn’t sure how to respond. The last time he tried to express his apologies didn’t exactly go well.  “That must be really hard,” he said as he put a hand on Steve’s shoulder in an attempt at comforting.

            Steve smiled politely at that.  “Sorry. I didn’t mean to go on like that.  I’m trying to focus on the positive. My kids are healthy.  I’m healthy. Overall, we’re getting by. Dr. Maximoff thinks we’re doing well.  I’m trying to focus on that stuff.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah, but it’s only been a few months."

            Steve frowned.  “It’ll be six months in two weeks.  I can’t have my kids living in suspended animation like this anymore.  I’ve been keeping them in this limbo, and that’s not fair to them.”

            “I don’t think it’s that simple,” Bucky said honestly.  “It’s not like Tony died of natural causes here, it makes sense that this mourning process might take longer than others.”

            “I know,” Steve said sadly.  “I’m not saying that we have to get better tomorrow.  I’m just saying that it’s time to get back to our normal routines, and _life._  We have to start living again.”

            “I agree,” he said.  “I think that so long as you all take it slow and steady, you will be fine.”

            Steve sighed as the _Bubble Guppies_ end credits began to roll.  As if on cue, Jamie began to whine.  “Pa! Bubba Gup!”

            “Nope,” Steve said as he clapped his hands and walked over to the TV.  “Exercise time!”

            Bucky laughed at that.  Steve had actually been using the “Baby and Me” yoga DVD that he and Howie had picked up for Christmas.  

            Jamie actually started clapping at that.  “Yay!”

            “He only likes it because he thinks you’re playing,” Bucky said as Steve began setting up the yoga matt, and a pillow for Jamie.

            “We _are_ playing,” Steve said with the most adorable smile that Bucky had _ever_ seen on a grown man.  “It just keeps our cores nice and strong too!”

            Bucky bit back a laugh at that.  “Naturally.”

            Steve put the DVD in and skipped over to the yoga matt.  Jamie did _not_ do the exercises the way he was supposed to in the slightest.  His participation mostly consisted of jumping up and down to the music, laughing at Steve while he did the actual yoga poses, and walking over to Steve to pull attention back to himself.  It was a disaster. Why had Bucky thought this was a good gift?

            One thing that was nice about it, was the view.  As hard as Bucky tried to focus on reading Barton’s status report, Steve’s ass was so goddamn distracting, which was just not fair.  Steve was just making it impossible for him to do his job. Did he have to look like he belonged in a museum, like everything else in Stark’s gorgeous home?

            “You want to join in, Sarge?” Steve asked, and he was looking at him through his own legs as he was bending down to touch his toes.  He was fucking doing this on purpose.

            Bucky had to clench his jaw tightly to keep it from hitting the goddamn floor.  He cleared his throat. “No thank you.”

            “You sure?” He asked as he stood upright and twisted so that his torso was facing him while his feet were securely planted in the same position.  “It’s not exactly the most complex.”

            Bucky nodded.  “I can see that.  Just reading some of Barton’s reports.  Trying to stay updated on all things Sarah.”

            “Anything interesting?” Steve asked as Jamie waddled over while Steve was trying to get into child’s pose.

            Bucky shook his head.  “Same shit, different day.”

            “Shit,” Jamie said clear a whistle.

            Steve’s eyes widened.  “ _Sit._ ” Steve said loudly. “The word is _sit._ ”

            “Oh man,” Bucky said trying not to laugh.  “I didn’t mean--”

            “He’s got six older siblings, it was gonna happen sooner or later.” Steve put his hands on his hips and shook his head.  “We are all gonna have to be super careful with our language now.”

            Jamie however didn’t seem to be paying any attention.  He just went back over to his pillow and bent over to try and stretch.  Steve gave a chuckle. “Tony would have been on the _floor_ if he’d heard that.  He used to think it was _hysterical_ when the kids would swear.  I would get so upset every time it inevitably happened, and Tony would just laugh.  I think he used to brag to all his friends about it too.”

            “I mean that was pretty funny,” Bucky said honestly.  “It took all my willpower not to laugh.”

            Steve rolled his eyes playfully at that.  “I’m glad someone found it funny. It better not happen again.”

            Bucky raised an eyebrow.  “Well, I’ll do my best. I make no promises though.”

            “Fair enough.”  Steve smiled as the video ended.  

            “More?” Jamie asked.

            Steve shook his head.  “All done! Bath time!”

            Jamie began to pout, and Bucky didn’t know how Steve ever said no to that face.  His eyes were wide and he shook his head. “No, Pa.”

            Steve put his hands on his hips and gave him a very serious look.  “Yes, Jamie. It’s bath time. You’re stinky.”

            “You stinky!” Jamie stomped his foot angrily.  “Pa, play!”

            Steve gave him a look.  “This is not a debate!”

            “Pa!  No!” Jamie crossed his arms, and Bucky honestly would have just given in well before that point.

            Steve shook his head again as he scooped up the little one.  “Yes. Bath time.”

            Jamie began crying, but Steve didn’t pay any mind.  He turned back to Bucky. “Anyway. Dinner tonight, it’s not a big deal or anything.  It’ll just be nice for us to all see a little less of these four walls.”

            “If you’re sure,” Bucky said cautiously.  “I don’t want to intrude.”

            “Stop it,” Steve said warningly.  “If you question it again, I’m going to get offended.  You’ve been here for six months--”

            “And we’ve shared two actual meals together,” Bucky said, mostly teasing.

            Steve’s face fell at that.  “I really hope that’s not true.”

            Bucky made a face.  “It’s not a big deal, Rogers.  I’m not here to be included, I’m here to make sure that you’re all safe.”

            “You’ve done so much for us,” Steve said looking down.  “I’m so sorry.”

            “Don’t be.  It’s really not a big deal.  I’ve worked some jobs where my subjects don’t even talk to me,” Bucky said honestly.  “This has probably been the most enjoyable assignment I’ve ever had.”

            Steve grinned at that, and it lit up the whole room.  “Well, in case it was not clear, you are welcome to join us for any and all meals.”

            “Thank you,” Bucky said.  “But it is not necessary--”

            “No,” Steve said cutting him off.  “I want you to eat with us. You’ve been with us for the past six months, you should feel welcome here.”

            Bucky wasn’t sure how to respond.  He and Steve had certainly had a hot and cold friendship.  He wasn’t sure if this was him trying to be positive or if this would turn sour later on.  “I appreciate that.”

            Steve took the crying toddler and headed up the steps. Bucky took a deep breath once he was alone.  Steve was definitely trying to kill him.

_The family has been acting strangely.  I can’t put my finger on what’s going on._

            The kids were skittish.  They wouldn’t make eye contact with him.  Harrison just kept laughing every time Bucky was in the room.  They must have really been excited about the dinner. Even Howie had been keeping his distance.  Maybe he didn’t feel comfortable with Bucky joining them for dinner. He didn’t want to be a burden.

            “Hey,” Steve said, Jamie on his hip.  “We ready to go?”

            “Yes,” Talia groaned from the couch.  “We’re _starving._ ”

            Howie nodded.  “I forgot how long it takes you to get ready.”

            Steve gritted his teeth.  “Well it’s not like I’m just getting _myself_ ready--”

            “Well I helped Harrison and the twins and yet I was still ready before you,” Howie muttered under his breath.

            Steve’s eyes widened slightly at that.  “I’m not gonna have this conversation right now.  We are all going out to dinner and having a nice time.  If anyone has anything else to say, they can stay here while the rest of us enjoy a nice night out.”

            The room went so quiet you could hear a pin drop.  Howie, was clearly still annoyed. His face was red and he was shaking his head, but he didn’t utter another word.  Apparently, Steve had made his point.

            “Let’s head out,” Steve said as he watched as the other filed out of the house.

            “I’m gonna follow you all from my vehicle to observe--”

            Steve tilted his head slightly, and gave him a face as if to say “seriously?”  “Bucky, just sit shotgun. The restaurant is just up the block.”

            “Steve, I don’t--”

            “Come on, I drive the kids to school every morning without you behind us--”

            “Not every morning.”

            “Is this the time?” Steve asked exasperatedly.  “Come on. It’ll be fun. You can see how the acoustics in the SUV really enhance Jamie’s shrieks.”

            “It’s tempting,” Bucky said sarcastically.

            “Please?” Steve practically gave him sad puppy dog eyes.  He was absolutely fucked.

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah--yeah. I guess.”

            Steve beamed.  “Great!” He headed out the door and went over to put Jamie in his car seat.

            Bucky awkwardly took a seat in the passenger seat.  The kids were already arguing over who would sit next to who at the restaurant, and Bucky was regretting his decision not to take his own car.  The kids were great, but he was glad that he no longer took care of any pick ups or drop offs. That was all just too much.

            After a few moments, Steve joined him in the front of the car.  “Everyone buckled?” Steve called back to the kids.

            “They’re all good,” Howie called back.  “I’ve checked.”

            Steve nodded as he began driving to the restaurant.  To his credit, it really wasn’t a long ride at all, and Bucky following closely behind him would have been slightly ridiculous.

            When they did get to the restaurant, the kids all filed out of the car almost before Steve even put the car in park.  They must have been pretty hungry. Howie had taken Jamie out of the car seat and handed Steve the diaper bag. Bucky was just relieved to be out of the car.

            They walked into the restaurant, which was really just a diner, all in all.  Still, it was nice to see the kids so excited for something. Bucky wondered if this was something that they used to do often before Stark passed.  Stark certainly seemed like the type of person that would spoil his kids rotten if he could, so maybe going out to eat was a regular occurrence up until his passing.  He didn’t want to ask though. The last thing that this evening needed was reminding of who was missing.

            They did wind up having to wait about a half hour to be seated as they were a party of eight.  That was worse than Bucky could have imagined. The kids were far more cranky than Bucky had ever seen them.  He made a mental note not to let them get hungry on his watch--not if this was the end result.

            They were finally seated, and Jamie was given a high chair.  The kids wasted no time playing with the coloring books that were handed out and looking through the kids’ menu.  Bucky, on the other hand, had no idea what to order. What was even appropriate to order in this situation? Should he offer to pay for everyone?  Would Steve kick his ass if he even tried it? The whole thing was uncharted territory.

            “What are you gonna have, Mr. Bucky?” Harrison asked as he was coloring in a cowboy picture.

            Bucky shrugged.  “I don’t know. What about you?”

            “Mozzarella sticks,” Harrison said matter-of-factly.

            “Good choice,” Bucky said as he continued to look through the menu.

            “The burgers here are pretty good,” Howie suggested.  “I know Pops is probably going to get his chicken caesar salad wrap.”

            Steve frowned. “What’s wrong with the wrap?”

            “It’s not exactly fun,” Maria teased, and it was refreshing to see her being lighthearted.  He was so used to seeing her looking so glum.

            Steve play frowned at that.  “Well, I get the burgers sometimes too.”

            AJ grinned.  “Chicken fingers are good too, Pa.”

            “I’m sure they are,” Steve said as he gave Jamie some of the cheerios that he had packed for him.

            Talia sighed.  “I think I’m gonna have a grilled cheese.”

            “Another good choice,” Steve said with a smile.

            “I have to go potty,” Harrison said.

            Steve took a deep breath.  “I thought you went back at the house.”

            “I drinked too much water.” Harrison looked down.  “Pa, it’s an emergency!”

            “Okay, okay,” Steve said as he stood up and Harrison slid out of his chair. “C’mon.”

            Harrison took Steve’s hand and they ran over to where the restrooms were in the back of the diner.

            “I knew that was gonna happen,” AJ said as he shook his head.  “Harrison always has to go to the bathroom when we go anywhere.”

            Talia nodded as she was coloring in the picture of an astronaut.  “Daddy used to say it was because he had a tiny ladder.”

            “Bladder,” Howie corrected politely.  “He has a tiny _bladder_.”

            “Same difference,” Talia said as she went back to focusing on her artwork.

            Maria laughed as she looked over to Bucky.  “Everything here is pretty good. Even Sarah liked everything she ever ate here and she’s picky.”

            “She’s pretentious,” Howie said with a tight smile. “But yeah, she liked the food here.”

            “You don’t have to be mean,” Maria said under her breath.  “She’s not even here.”

            “Therein lies the point,” Howie muttered.

            Maria made a face but didn’t say anything.  “I’m getting a panini.”

            “You’re like a grandma,” Howie teased.  “What ten-year-old orders a panini?”

            “A pretentious one,” she said as she sipped on her water.

            Howie sighed.  “I wasn’t talking about you--”

            “I didn’t say you were,” Maria said.  “It doesn’t matter, because the paninis here are the best.”

            Bucky glanced over the menu again.  Honestly, the safe choice was a burger.  They weren’t too expensive and it wasn’t something that diners could really mess up.  It was the safe choice and he was sticking to it.

            Finally Steve and Harrison came back to the table, and the waiter finally came over.  They all ordered and Bucky was just glad that the ordering part was done with. He’d never been more stressed out over ordering food in his entire life.  

            The food actually came out pretty quickly, which was a relief as the kids were getting cranky waiting.  The kids, to their credit, really did eat most of their meals. It was probably because they were all so hungry.  Maybe that had been Steve’s plan all along. If so, that was mastermind level thinking.

            “So,” Steve said as the waiter finished taking their plates away.  “Who wants to tell Sergeant Barnes why we’re eating out tonight?”

            Harrison raised his hand so quickly that Bucky thought the kid might hurt himself.  

            “Go ahead, Harrison,” Steve said.

            “No fair!” Talia crossed her arms.

            “Next time, Tal.” Steve gave her a smile.

            “It’s your birthday, Mr. Bucky!” Harrison exclaimed.  “Happy Birthday!”

            Bucky actually smiled at that.  He didn’t think that they knew. He certainly hadn’t told anyone.  “Wha--how?”

            “I may have read your file a few times,” Steve said with a sly smile.  “We just wanted to do something nice for you. It was the least we could do.”

            “This really isn’t neces--”

            “Do not finish that sentence,” Steve said as he pointed his finger at him.  “We have a lot to be thankful for, but you’ve kept us safe. Without you… who knows where we’d be.”

            “We have presents!” Talia exclaimed as she grabbed Steve’s diaper bag.

            Bucky felt his heart begin to swell.  He had to admit, leaving this assignment was going to be the hardest thing he’d ever have to do.  These kids had him wrapped around their fingers, and there was no denying it. He’d never been the kind of guy who thought that he’d ever have kids, but after this… he could certainly see the appeal.

            “You really shouldn’t have,” Bucky said as Talia hopped on his lap and gave him a medium-sized gift bag.

            “It’s not much,” Steve said as Bucky began opening it.  “We just wanted to do a little something.”

            Inside the bag were some more handmade drawings, and this time there was a whole scrapbook.  It had pictures of him with all the kids--most of them he had no idea were even taken at the time.  There were also countless more drawings that the kids had made for him. The last picture though was a drawing of him and Jamie asleep on the couch. It was good.  Really good.

            Steve saw him looking at it and grinned.  “That’s one of my works. The kids thought I should include myself.”

            “This is incredible,” Bucky said, mostly to himself.  “Thank you. This is amazing. You’re all so talented, and I’ll get to tell everyone that I knew who you were before you were all famous.”

            Talia giggled at that as she climbed off Bucky’s lap.  “Do you like it?”

            “I _love_ it,” Bucky said honestly.  “This is one of the nicest gifts I’ve ever gotten.”

            “I tried to get in contact with your sisters to surprise you,” Steve said.  “But I couldn’t find any contact information.”

            Bucky laughed.  “That’s very sweet, but they’re all married.  They don’t go by Barnes anymore. It’s no wonder why you couldn’t find them.  Besides, I doubt they would have been able to come anyway.”

            Steve shrugged.  “I hope I still get points for trying.”

            Bucky almost choked on his water.  Was he imagining it, or had Steve been flirting.  No--it was probably just wishful thinking on his part.  Steve Rogers was so gorgeous he deserved to be preserved in the MOMA, there was no way he was flirting with the likes of him--not when his last partner was a genius, billionaire who spoiled him and their children.

            “Of course,” Bucky said.  “I really appreciate _all_ of this.  It was so not necessary.”

            “It’s your birthday,” Howie said.  “We had to do something.”

            Bucky had to pause a minute.  He felt himself beginning to get a bit teary-eyed.  He never thought he’d ever have anything close to this, and this family had embraced him despite going through everything they were.  He never would have thought when this all started that they’d end up here. This was _dangerous_.  He was getting too attached, and he was in too deep to recuse himself.

 

 


	12. Chapter 11

_Status Report: April_.-- _Steve starts dating again._

            “I don’t like it!” Howie shouted at Steve from across the house.  “It hasn’t even been a year!”

            “Howie, it’s been seven months!” Steve yelled back.  “I think you know how hard this has been for me!”

            “What about the rest of us?” Howie’s voice echoed throughout the halls.

            Steve groaned.  “It’s one date--”

            “That’s how everything starts!” Howie yelled.  “If it were the other way around, Dad would have _never_ starting seeing anyone else!  He always said you were the only person--”

            “Do not lecture me!” Steve snapped.  “This isn’t a conversation! Now, what would you like for dinner so I can set it up--”

            “Don’t bother!  I’m going out tonight too!” Howie said as he began storming down the stairs.  

            Bucky gave him a look.  “Where you going, kid? Not being nosy, just gotta make sure you’re safe.”

            Howie groaned.  “Seriously?”

            Bucky nodded.  “Deadly.”

            “I was just gonna head over to Uncle Sam’s.”  Howie crossed his arms.

            “You’re gonna walk?” Bucky pressed him.

            Howie just gave him a look.  “You’re making my dramatic exit a lot less dramatic right now.”

            Steve came down the steps and relaxed when he saw that Howie was still there.  “Howie--”

            “Oh you’re still gonna call me that?  You know I was named after _Dad’s_ father.  I thought since we were trying to forget about him--”

            “Howie, stop it!” Maria yelled from the top of the stairs.  “You’re not being fair!”

            Howie grimaced at that.  “ _I’m_ not being fair?  He’s the one not being fair! He’s the one--”

            “Just stop it!” Maria stomped.  “It’s been seven months! No one here is forgetting about Dad!  It’s one date, Papa’s not getting married!”

            “Not yet!” Howie said desperately.  “It’s too soon.”

            “That is not for you to decide,” Steve said calmly.  “If you want to go out tonight, then I can take you to a friend’s house or something, but it’s not gonna keep me from going out too.  I can ask Uncle Sam and Riley to sit. Worst case scenario, Bucky is more than capable of holding down the fort.”

            Bucky really did not want to get involved.  He personally agreed with Howie. He thought that Steve dating would do more harm than good, but he wasn’t about to express that opinion.  It really wasn’t any of his business, as Steve’s date was already determined not to be a threat.

            Howie rolled his eyes.  He didn’t say anything as he turned around and made his way back up the steps.  It was a small win for Steve.

            Steve took a deep breath.  He turned back to look at Bucky.  “Can you give me a hand with something upstairs?”

            Bucky nodded.  He was just glad to be able to leave the situation.  He followed Steve up the steps. “Everything okay?”

            “Yeah, no.  I just wanted to pick your brain about something,” Steve said as they entered the master bedroom.  Bucky hadn’t been in there since there were six kids residing in there with Steve. Since then the room had been seriously cleaned up.  Steve really was a bit of a neat freak.

            “What’s up?” Bucky asked as he took a seat at the foot at the bed.

            Steve laughed nervously.  “Don’t laugh at me… it’s just… I haven’t done this in a while.”

            “I won’t laugh,” Bucky said honestly.  He was usually pretty good at keeping his cool.

            Steve nodded nervously as he went into his closet and came back out with two different shirts.  “Which one?”

            Bucky couldn’t help it.  He laughed. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what I was expecting.  I just didn’t think fashion advice was part of it.”

            Steve gave him a look.  “Come on, I know! I didn’t get the fashion gene!”

            “What makes you think I did?” Bucky laughed as he looked down at his own outfit.  “I’m very monochromatic.”

            “I mostly just wear--”

            “Clothes that are two sizes too small,” Bucky finished for him.

            Steve shook his head.  “I was going to say form-fitting activewear.”

            “I guess it’s still not exactly evening wear,” Bucky said.

            “Exactly,” Steve said as he frowned and looked at the two shirts in his hands.  One was a blue button down and the other was green.

            “Where are you guys even going tonight?” Bucky asked.  “I mean the dress code for coffee must vary from a fancy dinner.”

            “I’m taking her dancing.  It’s Swing Night at one of the local bars.  I figured that’s fun and themed,” Steve said and his face began to redden.

            Bucky had to stop from laughing again.  Steve _would_ be the kind of guy to suggest Swing  Night as a first date. “Well, I mean… either shirt could work then.  I’m assuming you’ve got slacks and dress shoes.”

            Steve raised an eyebrow.  “Yeah. I’ve got that stuff.  Tony used to make us go to these fancy parties all the time.   I just never had to… do this myself. Tony would help. I know it sounds dumb.”

            “I don’t think it’s dumb,” Bucky said honestly.  “Wear the blue one. It’ll make your eyes pop and she’ll practically melt everytime she looks at you.”

            “Thanks,” Steve gave him a grateful smile.  “I appreciate it.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah, no worries.  I’m glad I could help.  I’ll be downstairs if you need anything else.”  Bucky excused himself as Steve began to take off his shirt to change.  If Bucky had stayed for that, he’d been in more trouble than he had already gotten himself into.

            Steve came back down the steps about twenty minutes following the shirt conversation.  He had taken Bucky’s advice and worn the blue shirt. “How do I look?” Steve put his arms out and gave a spin.

            Maria giggled.  “You look very handsome, Papa.”

            “She’s not gonna know what hit her,” Bucky said honestly.  Steve looked like a dream. Who knew seeing him in date-wear would have brought this out in Bucky.  He had the sudden urge to stop Steve from walking out the door. It was a selfish, disgusting thought, but Bucky didn’t want Steve to go on that date.  Couldn’t he just stay in and have movie night with Bucky and the kids?

            “I’m heading out,” Steve said with a nervous grin.  “I’ll have my cell phone on if you guys need anything.  We shouldn’t be out too late.”

            “Have fun!” Maria called.  “Tell Miss Peggy we say hello!”

            Steve beamed at that.  “I’ll let her know everyone says hi.”  He turned back to Bucky. “You need anything from me before I go?”

            Bucky shook his head.  “No. You know the drill, anything happens, click your panic button, I’ll be over there before you know it.”

            Steve nodded.  “Thanks. Again, I have my cell if anything comes up--”

            “Papa, go!  We got this,” Maria said with a small giggle.

            Steve bit his lip nervously.  “And you’re sure I look okay?”

            “You look like a dream, Rogers,” Bucky said honestly.  “Go dancing. Have fun. Tell us all about it when you get back.”

            Steve made his way towards the door.  He paused, looked back for a moment and turned back.  He exited the house and closed the door behind him.

            Bucky’s heart sank.  He almost wished that Steve would have changed his mind.  It was a terrible thought, but it was still there.

            The evening with the kids was all in all pretty boring.  All they did was watch Disney movies on the couch, which was typically Bucky’s ideal night, but he couldn’t relax.  He kept checking Steve’s location on his tablet. Almost every fifteen minutes or so he made sure to check in.

            Eventually, the kids went up to bed.  Bucky stayed up. Waiting. It was dumb.  Steve was a grown man, and there hadn’t been _any_ signs of danger in the past several months.  He was mostly there as a formality now. Pierce hardly even checked in on him anymore, and Barton’s reports seemed to be equally uneventful.  He really had no reason to worry… but it was _killing_ him.  

            When Steve finally did walk through the door, it was almost two in the morning.  Bucky pretended to be watching the TV, which was playing _Modern Family_ reruns.  He looked over his shoulder to see Steve who looked like a lovesick teenager.  He was smiling sweetly to himself, his cheeks were red, and he had a little skip in his step.  He was happy. Bucky was disappointed, and that made him feel even more awful about himself. He hadn’t ever seen Steve so giddy, and yet he was upset because it was someone else making him feel that way.  How fucked was that?

            “I take it you had fun?” Bucky asked, trying to fake it.

            Steve chuckled.  “We danced all night!  She was great… I… I don’t think I’ve laughed that much… ever.”

            Bucky felt a pit begin to well in his stomach.  “You think you’re gonna see her again?”

            Steve nodded and grinned.  The grin that was usually a piece of art made Bucky feel like he was being slammed in the gut.  “We’re going out again this weekend.”

            “Wow,” Bucky said.  That was all he could say.  

            Steve sat down next to him on the couch.  “Were the kids okay?”

            “Yeah,” Bucky said honestly.  “We watched some cartoons and then they went up to bed.”

            “Did Howie come down at all?” Steve asked.

            Bucky shook his head.  “He made himself scarce for most of the night.  I think this is all pretty weird for him.”

            “I know,” Steve said sadly.  “But this is good. It’s not gonna be easy, but… I like her, Buck.  I mean she’s smart, funny, and beautiful. She’s the whole package.”

            “I guess you have a type,” Bucky said trying not to seem bitter in the slightest.

            Steve sighed wistfully.  “I guess she and Tony are pretty similar in those regards.  Although, Tony was his funniest when he wasn’t trying to be funny.”

            Bucky nodded.  All he could think about was how he didn’t really tick any of those boxes.  He was not all that smart, he really wasn’t that funny, and he was objectively attractive.  It was dumb and trivial, but he really wished he could have been in that category so maybe Steve would have looked in his direction.  Not that it even mattered, he wouldn’t be able to act on it anyway. The point was moot. Still, it would have been nice to have been picked.

            “What are you thinking?” Steve asked as he looked into Bucky’s eyes with his beautiful blue sparkling irises.

            “I was just thinking that… is this… isn’t it a little inappropriate to be dating your son’s teacher?” Bucky immediately regretting asking it.

            “What?”  Steve recoiled.  He physically backed away an inch or so.  “Why would you ask me that?”

            Bucky shook his head.  “I didn’t mean anything by it.  I’m just asking if that’s something that’s thought of a certain way.  I just… I don’t know that the protocol is. Is there a protocol?”

            Steve looked down.  “Harrison is in preschool… I don’t think I’m jeopardizing anything, and Peggy is a professional.  If this doesn’t work out, I don’t imagine she’d take it out on my four-year-old.”

            “I wasn’t--I’m sorry,” Bucky said.  “I just put my foot in it. I really didn’t mean anything by it.  The whole thing just caught me off guard a little when you told me you were taking her out.  Now you’re saying that you want to see her again, I just… I thought it was a little out of character.  You’re usually so by the book. I didn’t mean that you shouldn’t see her. I meant the opposite. It’s good to get out of your comfort zone every now again.  If you’re with someone special, you shouldn’t care about that stuff. I’m glad you may have found something like that.”

            Steve raised an eyebrow.  “I mean, I’m not gonna marry her--at least not for a _very_ long time.  This was one date.  I had a nice time. We’re gonna go on another one.  That’s all any of this means.”

            “Of course,” Bucky said.  “I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean--”

            “You’re forgiven,” Steve said.  “I’m sure this makes your job complicated.  The possibility of having someone else around more, wondering if this will change Harrison’s schooling situation.  I get that it wasn’t personal. Sorry for taking it that way.”

            Bucky blinked.  It _was_ personal.  He wasn’t about to tell Steve that.  “Yeah, of course. I get why you would have taken it that way.”

            “I’m gonna head up to bed,” Steve said as he stood up from the couch.  “You gonna turn in soon?”

            Bucky nodded and motioned to the television.  “Yeah. I’ll probably head up in a few minutes.  I just gotta find out if they find Larry the cat.”

            Steve smiled as he walked over to the staircase.  “I’ll see you tomorrow. Sleep well.”

            “You too,” Bucky said, as he put his head in his hands.  This was not good. He was getting way too attached.

 

 


	13. Chapter 12

_Status Report: May--Easter_

_Sarah is back home.  Carter is around more and more._

“Buck!” Jamie yelled at him.  “Egg!” He was handing Bucky one of his plastic eggs.  He must have needed help opening it.

            “What do you say?” Steve scolded him.

            “Peas.  Buck. Egg.” Jamie attempted to say please and thank you now.  Well he attempted when Steve remembered to tell him.

            Bucky took the plastic egg an opened it for him.  He handed him the egg that was already empty. “All gone.”

            “Enty.” Jamie crossed his arms.

            “I think you’ve had enough candy, darling,” Peggy said sweetly, and Bucky had to fight the urge to roll his eyes.  She’d been around for barely over a month and she was already acting like she was their step-parent.

            Howie scoffed.  “I think he can have a little more, if he asks nicely.”

            “Howie,” Steve said warningly.  “We’re not doing this now.”

            Howie rolled his eyes.  “Whatever.”

            “So,” Sarah said, changing the subject.  “Miss Carter--”

            “Peggy is fine,” she said politely.

            “Peggy,” Sarah said sourly, and Bucky had never quite appreciated how passive aggressive she could be until this moment.  “I hear you’re Harrison’s teacher. I didn’t know teachers were allowed to be romantically involved with their students’ parents.”

            “Usually, it is frowned upon, but we disclosed it to the school board and they felt I could still be objective as this is just preschool we’re talking about,” Peggy said politely.

            Sarah turned to face Steve.  She crossed her arms. “You disclosed it to the school board after a month?”  
            “Sarah,” Steve said in confusion.  “Drop the interrogation please.”

            She shook her head in disbelief.  “I’m sorry, Papa. I just don’t know what you want me to say here.  This is crazy!”

            “Thank you!” Howie exclaimed.  “If Sarah and I can agree on something then it must be worth your attention!”

            “No one is trying to forget about or replace your dad,” Steve said.  “Look, I’m happier than I’ve been in a long time. Is that really such a bad thing?”

            “I like Miss Peggy!” Harrison said happily.  “She’s smart, and she likes to watch _Paw Patrol_ with me, and we do lots of fun art projects with her!”

            “I’m sure Miss Peggy is a wonderful _teacher_ ,” Sarah said with a saccharine smile.  “It’s the other role that I’m not so sure about.”

            “Hey,” Riley and Sam popped into the dinning room.  “Lay off Peggy, Sar. This is the happiest I’ve seen your dad in ages.  Don’t ruin this for him. So not cool.”

            Sarah rolled her eyes but didn’t argue.  “Hi, Uncle Riley.”

            “Happy Easter, pumpkin.  You finished your first year?”

            She nodded.  “Now I just gotta wait around for grades to be posted.”

            “Wow.”  Riley let out a whistle.  “Look at you, all grown up and done with your first year!  I bet your pops is thrilled to have you home for the entire summer.”

            “Yeah,” Steve said as he came up behind Peggy and wrapped his arms around her shoulders.  “We’ve got a lot of fun things planned for the summer.”

            Sarah blinked at them.  “Papa, I love you, but I will not be picnicking with you and Mary Poppins this summer.”

            Howie snorted at that.  “Ditto.”

            “Guys,” Sam said warningly.  “Be nice.”

            Bucky on the other hand, thought that it was pretty funny.  He just tried to stay in the background for this stuff. However that became harder and harder, as both Steve and Peggy were constantly trying to include him.

            “So, Mr. Barnes.”  Peggy still didn’t know that he was a security detail.  “Not spending the holiday with family?”

            “Bucky is family,” AJ said, making a face.  

            Bucky laughed.  “Thanks, bud. My sisters are kind of all over.  We don’t do a big thing for Easter. I’m sure I’m not missed.”

            “We’re happy you’re with us, Bucky,” Maria said genuinely.

_Status Report: One week later_

            Steve was currently measuring Harrison up against the wall in the living room.  “Look at how much you grew, little man!”

            Harrison grinned as he looked at the new marking tha Steve had just made.  “Wow! I’m getting _really_ tall, Pa.”

            “You are!” Steve agreed excitedly.

            “Look, Mr. Bucky!  Look at how tall I’m getting!” Harrison pointed excitedly to the wall.

            Bucky walked over to take a look.  “Wow! You’ll be taller than me soon!”

            Harrison laughed.  “Mr. Bucky, you’re so silly.”

            Bucky shrugged.  “Guilty.”

            Steve glanced at the time and smiled.  “I gotta go pick up Peg in a few minutes.”

            “Yeah?” Bucky asked.  “Things are going well between you two.”

            Steve nodded.  “She’s great.” As much as Bucky would have loved to have disagreed, she really was pretty awesome.  With the exception of Howie and Sarah, the kids loved her. She was funny, and ridiculously smart. Her talents were wasted on teaching preschool--she could be working in foreign intelligence if she wanted to.  It was easy to see why Steve liked her. She had unique and thoughtful opinions, she was great with his kids, and she was pretty easy on the eyes. Steve deserved someone like this. Steve deserved to be with someone like Peggy.

            “I’m happy for you,” Bucky said honestly.  “It really seems like she’s a good match.”

            Steve grinned.  “Thanks, Buck. I appreciate that.  I know some people think it’s a little soon--”

            “Who cares?” Bucky said.  “All that matters is that the two of you are happy.”

            “You’re right,” Steve said.  “I just wish the older two would get with the program.”

            “Give them some time,” Bucky said.  “They’ll come around.”

            Steve took a deep breath.  “You’re probably right. I’m gonna head out.”

            “I know the drill,” Bucky said.  “You have your cell, and you won’t be out too late.”

            Steve’s face flushed.  “Um… well. Don’t wait up or anything.”

            Bucky felt the color drain from his face.  “What?”

            “I just.”  Steve scratched the back of his neck.  “I might be a little bit later than usual tonight.”

            “Are you… planning on having a…  grown up sleepover?” Bucky asked, not sure if he wanted to hear the answer.

            Steve looked away from him.  “Maybe.”

            Bucky felt like his heart was in his stomach.  “Wow. That’s a big step.”

            Steve nodded.  “Yeah, I’m a little nervous about it.  Peggy and I discussed it, and I think it’s time, and she agrees.”

            “Good for you,” Bucky forced out.  “I… that’s great.”

            “Thanks,” Steve said awkwardly.  “I’m gonna.. . ” He motioned to the door.

            “Yeah,” Bucky said uncomfortably.  “Have a good time.”

            Steve smiled tightly at him as he took his keys off the hook and walked out the door.  Bucky stared at the door for a few moments, as if he were waiting for Steve to come back and tell him that he was just joking.  It didn’t happen.

            Bucky was _not_ staying up for Steve.  He actually only checked his location twice, and stopped when he realized that they were staying in at Peggy’s for the night.  The kids mostly entertained themselves for the evening. Sarah was staying over a friend’s house so Barton was looking after her.  Howie was in his bedroom, and Jamie had been in bed for hours. The twins were playing with Harrison and Maria had been playing with her dolls.  The kids were all in bed by 9:30.

            Bucky decided that he’d clean up the living room and then head up to bed.  He was putting away the tub of toys when the door slammed close. Bucky turned to see Steve.  He looked at the clock. It was barely 10:30.

            Steve was leaning against the door, tears were streaming down his face.  Bucky put the tub down. He walked over to where Steve was and just pulled him into his arms.  Steve was sobbing. He just leaned against Bucky as he cried into his chest.

            “It’s okay,” Bucky said, even though he had no idea what the hell was going on.

            Steve just continued to cry and Bucky just stood there holding him, not sure what to do.  

“Steve, what happened?” Bucky led him over to the couch, just to get him comfortable and relaxed.

            “Nothing.”  He hiccuped.  “It… it was too soon.  I freaked out.”

            Bucky sighed as he pulled Steve even closer to him.  “That’s okay. I’m sure Peggy will understand--”

            “No… not just too soon for the sex stuff.  I… I can’t ask her to hang around while I try to move on from my dead husband,” Steve cried.  “The fact is she was just a distraction, and that’s not fair to her.”

            “I get that,” Bucky said honestly as he rubbed tiny circles into Steve’s back.  “I’m sorry, Steve. I know you really liked her.”

            Steve whimpered.  “I’m not even that upset that it didn’t work out.  It just makes me miss Tony even more, but I’m mad at him too.  If he were still here, I wouldn’t have to go through this. I’d still have him.  God, I just want him back.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Anger is part of the process.”

            Steve didn’t even respond, he just kept crying into Bucky’s chest.  Bucky let him. He just held him there. Bucky wasn’t sure how long they stayed there for.  All he knew was Steve didn’t stop crying until his breathing evened out and he fell asleep. Bucky didn’t have the heart to wake him, so he stayed down there, holding Steve in his arms until his eyes were too heavy to keep them open.

            The next morning, Bucky woke up to Steve moving around on the couch.  Bucky looked at the clock. 7:00am. Shit. He hadn’t meant to spend the whole night down there.  “Morning.”

            Steve looked at him and gave an apologetic smile.  “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

            Bucky waved dismissively.  “It’s fine. I was hoping to be up by now anyway.  I try to get my safety checks done before seven.”

            Steve nodded.  “I should go check on Jamie.”

            “The baby monitor’s down here.  He’s fine,” Bucky said. “How are you doing?”

            Steve tensed at that.  “I’m… I’m okay. I think everything just caught me off guard last night.  I was doing so well and then everything just went to shit.”

            “What happened?” Bucky asked.  “You seemed so excited last night.”

            Steve looked down.  “I freaked out. Peggy and I were about to… I just freaked out, and I left.”

            “I’m sorry, that’s rough,” Bucky said, unsure of what else to say.  “Moving on is tough--”

            “I rushed into it.  I pushed myself because I wanted to prove that I was doing better, and then it all came crashing down.”  Steve rubbed his forehead. “At least Sarah and Howie will be happy. I know they didn’t really like her.”

            Bucky frowned.  “I don’t think they had a problem with _her_.  I just don’t think _they_ were ready to see you with anyone else.”

            Steve shrugged.  “Maybe. It doesn’t really matter anymore.  Besides, I don’t think I’ll be dating again for a very long time, if at all.  Maybe Tony was just my person. Maybe I’m not meant to be with anyone else.”

            Bucky frowned.  “It’s only been eight months or so, Steve.  Maybe Tony was it for you, but who knows? Maybe…  a few years down the line… you might feel differently.  Either way, the only thing that matters is that you feel comfortable.”

            Steve looked at him and there was something in his eyes that Bucky couldn’t quite put his finger on.  “Thanks. I appreciate that. I guess I just feel lonely sometimes, and Peggy… helped with that for a little while.”

            “Steve, you have seven kids.  You hardly ever have two minutes to yourself,” Bucky said. “Besides, if you ever just need someone to talk to, I’m here.”

            “Thank you,” Steve said.  “I might have to take you up on that.”

            Bucky cracked a smile.  “Well, good. The kids are great but it’s hard to talk about _Paw Patrol_ all day long.”

            Steve laughed.  “I don’t know. Talking dogs that come to the rescue--can’t get much more interesting than that.”

            “Fair point,” Bucky relented.  “It’d just be nice to talk to someone over the age of sixteen every now and again.”

            Steve crossed his arms.  “That’s not fair. We talk.”

            Bucky blew a raspberry at that.  “Barely. We talk about the kids, or sports, not real stuff.”

            Steve shrugged.  “I didn’t want to bother you with that stuff.”

            “You’re not bothering me, Steve,” Bucky said honestly.  “The only two adults I interact with on a regular basis are you and Barton.  Barton’s great, but he speaks in code, and lately has been all about the mission.  There’s no small talk. I could use non-work conversation with an adult.”

            Steve smiled, and it made Bucky’s heart flutter.  “Fair enough.”

            Bucky stretched as he stood up from the couch.  “I’m gonna go do the security checks. Holler if you need anything.”

            “Will do,” Steve said.

            Bucky nodded as he made his way over to the entrances and exits to make sure that they were secure.  He liked to get a jump on this earlier in the morning. However, he wasn’t planning on sleeping on the couch next to Steve all night.

            All the window and doors looked okay.  He didn’t have much to worry about. He did this everyday, and there had never been an issue where it looked like someone had tried to get in.  Still, he’d rather be safe than sorry.

            Bucky was finishing up when there was a knock at the door.  Steve walked over to where Bucky was, near the back door. “I’m not expecting anyone.”

            Bucky nodded.  He walked over to the kitchen.  His tablet was charging on the countertop.  He picked it up, and pulled up the cameras near the front door.  His brow furrowed. Carter? What the hell was Peggy Carter doing there?

            Bucky cleared his throat.  “It’s Peggy. Do you want me to take care of it?”

            The color drained from Steve’s face.  “No, no. I’d better go handle this. I owe her an explanation.  I kind of just ran out of there last night.”

            Bucky must have made a face because Steve got even paler.  “Look, cut me some slack. It was a weird night, and I haven’t done this in a while.”

            Bucky put his hands up defensively.  “Hey, I’m not thinking anything.”

            Steve sighed as he jogged over to the front door.  “Peggy, please come in.”

            Peggy Carter entered the house, and you could feel the tension in the air.  She had bags under her bloodshot eyes. She must not have gotten much sleep.  Bucky felt for her. This wasn’t her fault, and for the most part she seemed lovely.  She just caught Steve at the wrong time. He wasn’t ready to be with anyone yet, and it made sense.

            “Steve,” she said softly.  “You scared me last night. I wasn’t sure what to do.  If you felt pressured or anything, please know that I never meant for you to feel that way.  We don’t have to do _anything_ sexual if you don’t want to.  Not now, or not ever. The fact of the matter is, I like _you_ , Steve.  I’m sorry you didn’t feel comfortable last--”

            “Peggy, no,” Steve said as he put a hand on her shoulder.  “No, I never meant… you never… I’m the one who’s sorry. I panicked.  I should never have left the way I did last night. I’m… I just don’t think I’m ready for this.”

            “We don’t have to even think about trying anything like that again for a very long--” She began.

            “No.  I mean… I’m not ready to date,” Steve said flatly.  “I’m really sorry. Peggy, I _really_ like you, and I’d be lucky to be with someone half as extraordinary as you.  It’s just too soon, and I realized it too late. I never meant to hurt you--”

            She shushed him.  She put her finger to her ruby red lips and shushed him.  “Say no more.”

            “I really am sorry,” Steve said sadly.

            “It’s all right,” She said, even though it was very clear that she was hurt.  Bucky felt for her, he didn’t have any idea what he’d do if he was in her position.  Steve had to have a line of admirers at least a mile long. Peggy might have gotten to him first, but it was just too soon.  She must have been crushed. Bucky knew that he’d be devastated. There was just something about Steve Rogers.

            Steve hugged her awkwardly.  She pulled back and wiped a tear away from her eyes.  “Listen. Please do not feel that you need to pull Harrison from my class.  The school year’s almost over and I would never bring him into this.”

            Steve’s mouth opened slightly and he tilted his head to the side.  “Of course. I didn’t even think to pull Harrison. You’re the best Pre-K teacher in the building.  Harrison is lucky to have you.”

            She sniffled as she smiled sadly.  “Listen if you need anything--”

            “I have your number,” Steve said, looking down.  This wasn’t easy for him either. He liked Peggy.  That much was clear just based on the way he would light up around her.  As jealous as that had made Bucky, he was sad that Steve wasn’t gonna have that anymore.

            She nodded stiffly as she turned back to the front door.  She looked back for a moment. She opened her mouth and closed it.  She faced the door again and proceeded to swiftly walk out of it.

            Steve let out a deep breath as he put his hands on the top of his head.  “I think that went about as good as it could have.”

            Bucky agreed,  “I’d say so. Are you okay?”

            “Yeah,” Steve said after a few moments.  “I’m okay. I liked Peggy _a lot_ , but losing her is _nothing_ in comparison to what it was like to lose Tony.”

            Bucky gave him a look.  “Well, I think the circumstances are pretty different Steve.  You were Tony for over twenty years… you were with Peggy for a little over a month.  Plus… she’s still got--”

            “A pulse,” Steve finished for him.

            “I wasn’t going to put it quite that delicately, but yes.  Peggy is still alive. Very different circumstances.” Bucky crossed his arms.  “What are you gonna tell the kids? They kind of adored her.”

            Steve furrowed his brow at that.  “I really didn’t think about that yet.  I guess that I’ll just say we decided to be friends.  I don’t know.”

            Bucky shrugged.  “I guess that could work.  I think Howie and Sarah are gonna take it pretty hard.”

            Steve snorted at that.  “They’ll probably have a parade.”

 

_Status Report: One Week Later_

_Stark’s Birthday.  The kids are home from school_.

            “Sarah, can you drive me somewhere?” Howie asked under his breath.  They were in the living room. Sarah and Howie were standing together in the corner.  Bucky was trying his best to make it seem as though he wasn’t eavesdropping.

            “Really?  Today?” Sarah snapped under her breath.  Her eyes darted to the entryway. Steve was currently in the kitchen with Maria, who had just started crying while she was in the middle of making brownies.

            “I want to visit the grave site.” Howie looked her dead in the eyes.

            Sarah’s face fell and she grabbed Howie’s arm tightly and led him further away from everyone else.  “Have you gone completely insane? Today is not the day!”

            Howie’s face contorted as if she’d hit him.  “Sarah, we miss him too. _I_ miss him.  I know that Pa doesn’t feel like Dad’s ‘really there’ or whatever, but I sure as hell don’t feel him _here._  I just want to go pay my respects on his birthday.  Is that so wrong?”

            Sarah shook her head.  “Not today. Not unless Pa wants to go.”

            “He’s not the only one who lost him--” Howie choked out as angry tears began to flow from his eyes.

            Sarah sighed.  “Why don’t you go upstairs?  Have your moment. The fact is, I’m not strong enough to go to that grave and if I start crying, I’m afraid that I’ll never stop.  Let me take care of the others today. Lord knows you’ve carried that long enough.”

            Howie just pushed past her and stormed up the steps.  Sarah didn’t watch him go. She stayed staring at the spot where he was standing before she took a deep breath and walked over to the couch.  Talia was playing with her slime absentmindedly. It was clear that her mind was miles away from the house. AJ was playing with a magic set that he had.  Again, he really didn’t seem too engaged in what he was playing with. The only two really focused on what they were doing were Harrison and Jamie who were playing with Ninja Turtle Action Figures and watching _Mickey Mouse Clubhouse,_ respectively.

            “Everything okay?” Clint asked from where he was standing behind the couch.

            Sarah looked over to him.  She looked surprised, like she forgot Clint was there.  “Yeah. It’s just a hard day. Dad always _loved_ his birthday.”

            Clint nodded.  “If you need anything…”

            “Thank you,” she said, her eyes soft.  “I appreciate it.”

            “Yeah, Daddy took us to Disney World last year,” AJ said sadly.

            Talia nodded.  “I’d really just like to talk to him this year.  I miss him. I want to tell him about how well I’m doing in school this year.  I know he’d be really excited.”

            “Daddy knows, Talia,” Sarah said as she pushed Talia’s raven hair back behind her ear.  “He was always so proud of you. All of you.”

            Talia frowned.  “It’s not really the same, though.”

            Sarah’s bright blue eyes faltered.  She was usually so good to putting on whatever face she wanted to.  This one was harder for her. “You’re right. It’s not. That doesn’t make it any less true.  Daddy knew you were gonna crush first grade, just like Daddy knew that you were capable of doing _anything_ you put your mind to.  For what it’s worth, I’m super proud of you, and I can’t wait to see you do awesome in second grade.”

            “Thanks, Sarah, but…” her voice trailed off and she looked down at her shoes.

            “I know, squirt.  It’s not the same as hearing Dad say it,” Sarah said, and this had to be one of the few times that Bucky didn’t think that she was putting on a false exterior.

            Talia nodded.  “I just can’t… I don’t know how to put it.  He made me feel more excited than before.”

            Sarah laughed.  “Yeah, he would sing how proud he was from the rooftops.  He made sure that we could _feel_ just how proud he was.  When I got into colleges, I thought he was gonna throw a banquet or something he was so excited.”

            Talia nodded.  “He was like that.”

            Bucky glanced over at Barton.  He wasn’t sure how he could stand it.  Bucky hated being around them on their bad days like this, but Barton...  This must have been exponentially worse for Barton.

            “You good, Sarge?” Barton asked making eye contact.

            Bucky nodded.  “Just thinking.”

            “That’s dangerous,” Clint said with a smirk.

            Bucky gave a laugh but none of the others indulged.  It wasn’t clear if any of them had even heard the exchange.  They were all miles away from where they sat in the living room.

            The day passed strangely.  It wasn’t too long or too fast, there were just moments.  Some moments went on for what felt like eons, and others passed like the snap of a finger.  It was surreal.

            Steve got the kids to bed early.  None of them argued. Even Sarah and Howie had retired to their bedroom fairly early.  Bucky wasn’t sure that there would be much sleep taking place that night.

            Steve, to his credit, had managed to keep it together for most of the day.  Sure, he had a few moments where he had to excuse himself, but for the most part he was a rock, it was a nice change of pace from how these days usually went.

            “How are you holding up?” Bucky asked as he was helping Steve with the dishes.

            Steve shrugged.  “I don’t know. Tony’s birthday… it was usually a monumental occasion.  Today it’s just… a day. I don’t know how to feel about that.”

            “You didn’t hide out today.”  Bucky pointed out as he dried the dish that Steve had handed him.

            “I didn’t,” Steve confirmed.  “I still could have done better.  I could have made a cake or taken them to the gravesite, or taken them on vacation to distract--”

            Bucky shook his head.  “I think keeping them home was a good call, but they were still home so they felt comfortable enough to have whatever reactions they needed to have.”

            Steve laughed.  “You sound like him.  Tony used to read all these child development books--”

            “I didn’t read anything,” Bucky said honestly.  “This is just something my mom used to do with us when my dad passed in the service.”

            “Your dad passed in the service?” Steve asked.  “I didn’t know that.”

            “It probably wasn’t in my file,” Bucky said dryly.  “I was older. Probably a little older than Sarah is now.  My sisters were on the younger side.”

            Steve looked down.  “So you know what they’re going through.”

            Bucky shook his head.  “No. This was different.  Their father was specifically targeted.  Their home was under attack as a result. Our dad was caught in an explosion.  It was awful, but it was different. Does that make sense.”

            “I guess,” Steve said.  “You still know what it’s like to lose a parent this young.”

            “Well, so do you,” Bucky said almost on impulse.

            Steve blinked at him.  “I mean, yeah, but my Mom was sick.  I had plenty of time to say goodbye and come to terms with the fact that she wasn’t gonna get any better.”

            “Losing a parent still leaves a hole,” Bucky said as he gently put the glistening plate in the cabinet.  “I think the kids are coping remarkably well.”

            Steve snorted.  “Yeah? Howie is so goddamn angry lately, and I don’t know how to reach him.  Sarah runs aways from here the first chance she gets. Maria breaks down over the slightest change to her schedule--”

            “They’re not perfect… but they’re getting by,” Bucky said.  “That’s a win.”

            Steve sighed.  “I guess it just doesn’t always really feel like we’re getting by.  The hard part is, I always feel like I just want to talk to Tony about all this, and I have this brief second where I’m about to call him…and then I remember.  That’s almost as bad as losing him the first time. I have to keep losing him over and over again.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah. I imagine that’s awful, Steve, but you’re living.  This stuff… you learn to live with it, and you and kids have already come a really long way.”

            Steve turned off the sink.  He turned around and leaned against the counter.  “I just feel like we’ve been in hell for an eternity and it hasn’t even been a year yet.  If it weren’t for my kids…”

            Bucky put his hand on Steve’s shoulder and gave him a supportive tap.  “Yeah, I can imagine. You were in some pretty rough shape when I first showed up.”

            Steve laughed, he genuinely laughed.  “I still feel like that’s where I’m at sometimes.  I know that just the fact that I’m able to get out of bed every morning proves differently, Dr. Maximoff has been really clear on us celebrating the little victories, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say that I felt like locking the door to my bedroom today and just wallowing.”

            “But you didn’t,” Bucky said.  “That’s the point.”

            Steve gave him a grateful smile.  “Thanks, Buck. I know this isn’t part of you job--”

            Bucky shoved him playfully.  “C’mon, Rogers. I’ve been living here for months, we can talk about shit.”

            “Of course,” Steve said. “But, you were there when Tony…”

            “Do you wanna talk about _that_?” Bucky asked.  “We can, if you want.  I just want to make sure that you--”

            Steve shook his head.  “No, not really. I just… he’s… I can’t picture it.”

            “Can’t picture what?” He asked.

            “Him.  Dead. We had a closed casket.” Steve rubbed the back of his neck.  “I didn’t want the kids to see him like that.”

            Bucky nodded.  “It was strange.  He was so--”

            “Lively,” Steve finished for him.  “Tony was so full of life, and I still can’t wrap my head around the fact that he’s gone most days.”

            Bucky nodded.  “It was a really weird day.  We all thought it was gonna be an easy one. Transport.  Make the drop. Get him off safely. End of story. We didn’t know anything until it was too late.  I think… Tony was making a joke, and then the next thing we knew, we were under fire. I tried to get to him, but by the time I got there… it was too late.”

            Steve’s lips began to tremble.  “I’m sorry, I don’t think I want to hear this story.”

            “That’s fine,” Bucky said honestly.  “I don’t want to upset you.”

            “It’s okay.  I appreciate what you were trying to do,” Steve said softly.  “I should have known better.”

            Bucky sighed.  “How about I make myself scarce?  There’s a bottle of wine in there with your name on it.  Plus, there’s still a lot of leftover Easter candy. If it were me, I’d lock myself in my room, watch some sad chick-flick, eat candy, and drink too much wine.”

            Steve gave a sad laugh.  “That doesn’t sound half bad.”

            Bucky gave him one more tap on the shoulder, and stood up straight.  “If you need anything…”

            Steve gave a nod.  “I’ll know where to find you.”

            Bucky went to leave and Steve grabbed his arm gently.  Bucky stopped and turned to look at Steve. “Everything okay?”

            “I just… I don’t want to be alone right now,” Steve said, not looking him in the eyes.

            Bucky paused.  “Okay. I can hang around.”

            Steve smiled and squeezed his hand slightly.  “Thank you.”

            Bucky squeezed it back, he was already in too deep, he didn’t think he’d be able to deny Steve anything.  “Yeah, don’t mention it.”

            Steve’s smile faltered and he just held on to Bucky’s hand.  This must have been really hard on him. Bucky couldn’t imagine losing his partner and then trying to go on, nevermind with all the kids in the mix.

            “Want me to get the chocolate?” Bucky asked awkwardly.  He wasn’t sure how long he was supposed to just stand there.

            Steve nodded.  “Yeah, I’ll get the wine and pick out a movie.  Meet me upstairs?”

            “Upstairs?” Bucky asked.  “I thought we were gonna watch it in the living room.”

            Steve shook his head.  “I don’t want any of the kids to come down and interrupt.  I need a minute to not be a dad.”

            “Okay,” Bucky said nervously.  “You’re sure you feel comfortable with me--”

            “Of course,” Steve said.  “I mean, it’s just a movie.  Besides, it’s a California King, we can sit on opposite ends.”

            “So long as you’re comfortable,” Bucky said honestly.

            “I trust you,” Steve said, and the for the first time, Bucky actually believed it.  This was the first time that Steve was actually coming to him, and asking him for help.  In the past Bucky had always had to come to Steve’s aid on his own. This was different.

            Bucky nodded again, and Steve slowly let go of his hand.  Bucky made his way over to the hidden stash of Easter candy that Steve had been harbouring above the refrigerator.  He took a few moments. This was different. This _meant_ something.  He just wasn’t sure what.  This wasn’t romantic… the man was mourning his dead husband, but this had to be a touch past platonic.  

            He looked up at the steps and took a deep breath.  He nodded to himself and made his way up the steps.  He entered the master bedroom. Steve was sitting on the bed, he was pouring himself some wine.  Bucky tossed the candy over to him and took a seat on one of the chairs that was near the desk.

            “Stop, come sit over here,” Steve said with a mouthful of candy.  “The bed is the size of a continent. Besides, if we fall asleep here, it’s more comfortable, and there’s tons of room, so you won’t have to move me off you if I pass out again.”

            Bucky sighed as he stood up and took a seat on the bed.  It was like sitting on a marshmallow it was so soft. “Christ.  How do you get up in the morning? This is so comfortable.”

            “Tony insisted, and it was the best decision he ever made,” Steve said as he went to hand Bucky a glass of wine.

            “I’m on the clock--”

            “One glass won’t hurt, Buck,” Steve said with a look.  “We’re watching _Failure to Launch_ \--you’re gonna need something to drink.”

            “ _Failure to Launch_ is your chick flick of choice?” Bucky asked with mock disgust as he took the glass from Steve.  “Who hurt you, Rogers?”

            “It’s a great film,” Steve smirked as he took a sip of his own glass.

            “Just press play,” Bucky said as he hit him with one of the pillows.  

            Steve grinned as he put the movie on.  “I really do love this movie.”

            “You’re such a dork,” Bucky teased.  “Is it Matthew McConaughey, or the fact that Bradley Cooper’s in this too?”

            “Who says Sarah Jessica Parker doesn’t do it for me?” Steve teased back.

            “The fact that we’re not watching the _Sex and the City Movie_ says it all,” Bucky said taking a sip from his own glass.  

            “Fair point,” Steve said with a laugh as the movie began to play.  “And Matthew McConaughey is _way_ hotter than Bradley Cooper.”

            “All right, All right, All right,” Bucky said in a terrible attempt at a southern drawl.

            “Fuck off, Barnes.”  Steve hit him back with one of his own pillows.  “You think Bradley Cooper’s hotter?”

            Bucky shrugged.  “Neither of them is really my type.”

            “Who is your type then?  What are you a Ryan Gosling kind of guy?” Steve asked as he popped a chocolate egg into his mouth.

            Bucky shook his head.  “I don’t know.”

            “Come on,” Steve whine.  “I told you mine--”

            “No, I was able to guess,” Bucky corrected him.  “If you can guess, I’ll confirm it for you.”

            “Are they in this movie?” Steve asked.

            Bucky shook his head.  “No, he is not in _Failure to_ fucking _Launch._ ”

            Steve laughed again sipping on his wine.  “Chris Pine?”

            Bucky shook his head.  “I mean his eyes are otherworldly, but no.  Not Chris Pine.”

            Steve nodded.  “Okay. Let me think on this for a few minutes.”

            “Can I just say that it is so typical that you would like McConaughey?  Like same type of energy as Stark,” Bucky said. “Smart-ass, but kind of cute enough to get away with it.”

            Steve smiled sadly.  “I never really thought of it that way.  Tony would have never let me hear the end of it, if he’d ever heard that he was compared to Matthew McConaughey.”

            “No,” Bucky agreed.  “He probably wouldn’t have.”

            “DiCaprio?” Steve changed the subject back to Bucky.

            Bucky shrugged.  “Nah.”

            “Brad Pitt?”

            “Do I look that basic to you, Rogers?” Bucky asked playfully.

            Steve raised an eyebrow at that before he snapped his fingers.  “Channing Tatum.”

            Bucky laughed.  “All right, you got me.”

            “I should have put on _Magic Mike_ ,” Steve said, shaking his head.

            Bucky waved dismissively at him.  “Next time.”

            Steve nodded.  “Yeah… next time.”

 

 


	14. Chapter 13

_Status Report: First Week of June.  Progress was finally made on the bullying front_.

            After forwarding Fury all the footage that he had acquired of AJ’s bullying situation, the kid was finally switched out of AJ’s class.  Of course, this would happen with only little less than a month left in the school year. Still, Talia was happy to hear that there had finally been some sort of a resolution.  AJ, on the other hand seemed mostly indifferent. He hadn’t really let the bullying get to him to begin with. Rogers and Stark had sure done something right with these kids.

            Steve was over the moon when he found out that the kid had been removed from AJ’s class.  He’d practically sent Fury a thank you basket, and it had taken almost an eternity to get the whole thing taken care of.

            “You should request for him to not be in the same class with that kid next year,” Sarah said to Steve the day after the kid was removed from the class.  “Keep them separate for now. This is why you and Dad should have considered private school for younger ages. Everyone wants to beat up on Tony Stark’s kids.”

            Steve’s brow furrowed. “Did you have any issues?”

            Sarah scoffed.  “I was always able to handle myself.  Howie on the other hand. He takes after you more.  He’s… he’s kind, and he doesn’t understand how people can be cruel… but he’s good at pretending.  I worry about him, Papa.” She took a deep breath. “Papa, you can’t keeping putting all this on him.  He’s _sixteen_!  I’m not as strong as him, so I run.  I ran when Dad died, and I’m not strong enough to stay here full time, but _Howie_ … Howie is different.  He will throw his life away going to a subpar community college to stay here and help raise these kids, unless you tell him not to.”

            “What’s wrong with community college?” Steve crossed his arms.  “Besides, Howie--”

            “Is drowning,” Sarah said desperately.  “He needs permission to run too. He needs permission to feel his own pain.”

            Steve looked down at his shoes.  “Okay. I know he took on a lot, but--”

            “He took on too much, Pa,” Sarah said sadly, “and that’s on me too.  I’m the big sister. I’m the oldest. I should have come home. You didn’t ask, and I just wanted to run, so I didn’t look back.  I just can’t watch him drown anymore, Papa.” She shook her head and her golden locks shimmered in the light.

            It was incredible, she and Steve looked so much alike, but the way they looked at each other… if Bucky didn’t know better, he’d think they were strangers or… worse.  They were strained. Neither of them felt comfortable and you could feel the tension between them.

            “Sarah…” Steve began.  “You were both kids. Neither of you should have had to take anything on--”

            “But Howie _did_ take _everything_ on.  He took care of the kids and he took care of you,” Sarah said, her voice shaking.  “And I let him. That’s the worst part. You were hurting. You’d just lost your husband… your soulmate and I… left.  I left because I didn’t stop him.”

            Steve shook his head.  “There was no stopping your dad--”

            “I could have at least tried,” Sarah said, not looking Steve in the eye.  “I didn’t even try. I worshipped him. He said he wanted to do this and I didn’t even think of asking him to stay--”

            “I didn’t ask, either,” Steve said, turning away from her.  “Sarah, you’re the kid. This isn’t on you--”

            “It shouldn’t be on Howie either,” Sarah said firmly, and Bucky respected her.  She was standing her ground, regardless of how hard the situation was.

            “You think I don’t know that?” Steve asked, deadly calm.  “You think I don’t _hate_ myself for what I’ve put on him--”

            “Then let him go,” Sarah said.  “Talk to him and you set him free from this.  He sees you taking on more and he’s just waiting around for the other shoe to drop.  That won’t change if he stays here, Papa.”

            Steve turned back to face her.  “So is this it, Sarah? I don’t know what I’ve done to push you away, but is this it?  Am I only gonna see for the occasional holiday and when you’re on break? After school, are you just gonna settle somewhere, and the only contact I’ll get is a Christmas card?  Are you only here to lecture me, and make it more clear how horribly I’ve failed?”

            Sarah turned away this time.  She glanced up at the ceiling and took a moment before answering.  It was clear that she was trying to keep her emotions out of it. “You didn’t _do_ anything, Papa.  I can’t be here… not when he’s _not_ here.  It’s too hard.  I love you, and I love my brothers and sisters, but I can’t be here indefinitely.”

            “You don’t answer my calls.  I only know you’re okay because of Barton’s goddamn status reports and what your Aunt Natasha tells me,” Steve sniffed.  “I’m trying here. I’ve made mistakes, and Howie is a big one, but he’s not like you. He doesn’t want to leave. I offered to send him to stay with your Uncle Rhodey over the summer.  I’ve tried to book college tours. I’ve all but bought him a plane ticket out of here. He is not you, Sarah.”

            “But have you _talked_ to him?” She croaked out.  She still wasn’t facing him.  “Have you told him to let this go, or that you’ve got it from here?  Have you even asked him how he’s doing?”

            Steve didn’t say anything.

            Sarah laughed bitterly.  “Why is it so hard for men to just _talk?_  Talk to your son, Pa!  Tell him it’s okay, and then make those offers again, because you’re right.  He’s not like me. He is gonna wait until he has your express permission to move on from this place, and to let this role go.”

            “Fine, Sarah.  I’ll talk to him,” Steve said.  “But you… I don’t know where I went wrong?  I tried. I tried so hard, and everytime I try to take one step forward you take three back.”

            “I always thought it was gonna be you,” Sarah burst out.  “You were in the military when I was little. That’s how I see you.  It’s how I’ve always seen you. When I was little, I thought you were gonna die over there.  I never thought that I’d lose Dad, but I always feared in the back of my mind I’d lose you. When the tables turned, I was… my world was thrown upside down.  He was the safe one.

            “And then… seeing _you_ so… hurt.  It shattered my view of you.  I didn’t see the ‘Army Strong’ man who raised me and I couldn’t… I don’t know what to do with this.  It was too much.” The tears were flowing from her eyes, and they weren’t going to stop anytime soon.

            “Sarah,” Steve’s face fell, and he’d looked like someone had just slapped him across the face.  He reached out and touched her shoulder and she recoiled; as if she been burned by something.

            She raced out of the room and Steve just stared at where she was standing like he’d just seen a ghost.  He backed up against the counter, and leaned against it for support.

            “Steve,” Bucky said.  “Do--”

            “Can I have the room please?” Steve asked quietly.

            Bucky nodded.  “If you need me--”

            “Yeah,” Steve cut him off quietly.

            Bucky walked out of the room.  The moment he was out of there, he heard a crash.  He didn’t need to investigate. The kids were out. Jamie was asleep.  Steve could destroy the kitchen for now. Bucky knew he’d probably do the same thing if he were in Steve’s shoes.

            Bucky went up to his room.  Barton was standing outside of it.  “What the hell happened, Sarge? Sarah’s a mess--”

            “Family shit.  I’ve got nothing to do with it, and if you’re smart you’ll stay out of it too,” Bucky said.  “My guy is destroying the kitchen as we speak.”

            Clint shook his head.  “It should be simpler.”

            “It’s not.  This family has more skeletons in their closet than I’d ever imagined,” Bucky said.  “It’s insane.”

            “What was the fight about?” Barton asked.

            “Hell if I know,” Bucky said.  “They were talking about a lot of things, but I think the point is, this family is broken.  It was broken before Stark died. I just don’t see how the hell it’s ever gonna be fixed.” Bucky walked into his bedroom and lied down on the bed.  He just waited. He waited for the commotion in the kitchen to stop. After that he waited for Steve’s sobs to stop. He wanted nothing more than to go down there and comfort him.  He just didn’t know what he’d even begin to say.

            After about two hours, Bucky’s door creaked open.  Steve was standing there, tears flowing from his bright blue eyes.  

            “Hey,” Bucky said as he sat up.

            Steve sauntered over to him.  He didn’t even look up. He just collapsed in Bucky’s arms and cried.  Bucky just held him close and rubbed circles into his back. “I know. It’s okay.  Just let it out.”

            They stayed like that for a while.  Bucky sitting on the edge of his bed, and Steve kneeling next to it, just sobbing into Bucky’s shirt, he was clutching onto him for dear life, and Bucky just held him there.  There was nothing he could even say. For the first time since Bucky had met her, he believed that everything Sarah had said in that kitchen was honest. It was real, and raw and honest.  What was he supposed to say? How could he possibly make Steve feel better after a conversation like that?

 

_Status Report: Third Week of June_. _End of the school year._

The kids were in their last week of the school year and it was evident.  They were more energetic and hyped up than usual. It was exhausting. The twins were bouncing off the wall as Steve was trying to get them ready for school.  Sarah was getting Harrison’s backpack together as he was telling her all about how excited he was for the end of the year party. The kid was talking about a mile a minute.

            Steve and Sarah had barely said two words to each other since the fight.  Not that it was surprising. How do you move on from that? Clint was much less passive about this than Bucky was.  Bucky just wanted to stay out of it. It wasn’t his kid after all.

            Barton had a different approach.  Bucky could hear them fighting in hushed whispers everytime the two of them were in the same room.  Barton would say things like _“Go talk to him,”_ or _“He’s your father, Sarah.”_ Bucky just shook his head, not that he talk when it came to getting involved.  Bucky had certainly not kept his interest in the family professional. This was different though.  Bucky didn’t know how to proceed in this situation whatsoever, so he stayed out of it.

            As far as Bucky could tell, Steve did take part of his conversation with Sarah to heart.  He had certainly not allowed Howie to do as much as he used to. If Howie even tried to take over parenting duties, Steve would ask him to do something trivial and miniscule instead.  It was a step in the right direction.

            “Buck!” Jamie yelled at him from where he was playing with his plastic blocks on the carpet.  “Look!”

            Bucky looked over to see that Jamie was building a tower that was moments away from collapsing.  It was almost as tall as he was. “Wow!” Bucky exclaimed. “So big!”

            “Help, peas, Buck.” Jamie said as he was trying to put the next block up on the stack.

            Bucky lifted the boy up a few inches in the air so he could add the next block.  As Bucky predicted the blocks all came tumbling down. He held his breath and kept his eyes on Jamie. He’d learned from experience that this could go one of a few ways.  

            “All done!” Steve said excitedly as he came over to the blocks where they were sitting.  “We have to get going for drop off.”

            Jamie shook his head.  “No. No, Pa. Blocks!”

            Steve nodded.  “They’ll be here when we come back.”

            “Pa!” Jamie shrieked.  “Blocks!”

            “Look,” Steve pointed.  “The blocks fell. You need a diaper change, and this isn’t up for discussion.”  He scooped the little one up in his arms. Jamie, to his credit, did not have a tantrum like he usually did.  He just crossed his arms and pouted. It was cuter, and Bucky probably would have given in if he were Steve.

            Steve just brought the boy up the steps.  Bucky took it upon himself to clean up the blocks.  The last thing anyone needed was to step on these and break them.  Bucky had almost broken his neck tripping on these on more than one occasion.  

            Harrison came over and started helping Bucky clean up the blocks.  It was very sweet.

            “Thanks, bud,” Bucky said as he put the last of the blocks away in the tub.

            “You didn’t make the mess, but Jamie’s too little to clean up,” Harrison said as he got up from the floor.

            “I appreciate the help,” Bucky said honestly.  “Are you excited for your preschool graduation?”

            Harrison nodded eagerly. “I get to wear those robes and hat thingys. I bet Papa’s gonna cry.  He cried when Sarah graduated.”

            Bucky’s head teetered from side to side.  “Maybe.”

            “Papa cries a lot, Mr. Bucky,” Harrison said matter-of-factly.  “Maybe this time, it’ll just be happy crying.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Maybe. I guess we’ll find out soon.”

            Harrison nodded back as he picked up his backpack and waited over by the front door.  Bucky put the tub back in its usual corner. The twins met Harrison over by the door waiting to head out.  Maria came down the steps. Her hair was beautifully braided and Bucky was almost certain that Sarah had something to do with it.  Howie was the last to retreat down the steps. He didn’t even have his backpack. Just some pencils and a calculator. Testing.

            Steve came back down the steps with Jamie in his arms.  Jamie was playing with some toy cell phone and that was distracting him enough.  That was Steve’s new first line of defense, give the kid something to distract him so he doesn’t scream bloody murder in the car.  It worked most of the time.

            “Sarah, you coming?” Maria asked with a grin.  It was clear that she loved having her big sister home.  It must have been hard, to be the oldest girl in the home at age ten.  Especially, with everything going on.

            Sarah took a sip of her coffee.  “Not today. I’ve got to work on some stuff for my online summer course.  I’ll be here when you get home though. Maybe, we can jump in the pool if it’s ready.”

            Steve tensed at that.  “Yeah. Maybe I’ll work on opening the pool today.  Sarah, maybe you can help with that since you’ll be home.”

            “Or maybe,” Howie jumped in.  “Peter is visiting today--”

            “Shut up, Howie,” Sarah said through gritted teeth.

            “Peter?” Steve asked.  “Your dad’s intern last year?”

            Sarah nodded.  “According to _Howie_.  He’s back in town, trying to get a job with Aunt Pepper over the summer.  It’s not like she would have mentioned it to me…”

            “Why would she mention it to you?” Steve asked, his brow furrowed.

            “Because they have a history,” Howie teased.

            “As if.” Sarah rolled her eyes.  “He was into me, not the other way around.  I just meant that Aunt Pepper hardly speaks to me these days.”

            “Don’t take it personally,” Howie said.  “She doesn’t talk to any of us much these days.”

            That piqued Bucky’s interest.  When Pepper first stopped hanging around, Bucky was able to brush it off because it was around the holidays, but now it had been months since Potts had been by the house, or since anyone had really even mentioned her.

            “We should invite her over,” Talia suggested.  “I bet if I asked, then she’d come. It’s kind of hard to say no to me.”

            Steve shrugged.  “Aunt Pepper might have a good reason to keep her distance.  She and your dad were close. It might just be really hard for her--”

            “It’s really hard for us,” Sarah said through gritted teeth.

            “I know that,” Steve said quietly.  “You’ve made it quite clear, how earth-shattering it was for you when your dad died.  I’m sorry you’re all going through that. It doesn’t mean that other people aren’t allowed to have their own feelings about it too.”

            Sarah crossed her arms.  “Regardless, Aunt Pepper didn’t say a word to me about Peter being back in town, but she told Howie--”

            “She didn’t tell me,” Howie said back, with an eye roll.  “It was on Peter’s Facebook.”

            “Not that it matters anyway,” Sarah said pushing her golden hair behind her ear.  “I have absolutely zero interest in seeing Peter--”

            “Right… which is why you’re so upset you didn’t get the memo from Aunt Pepper directly,” Howie said sarcastically.  

            She gave him a look, and if looks could kill, Howie would have been murdered right where he stood.

            “All right,” Steve said moving on from this conversation.  “We gotta get going or you’re all gonna be late.”

            “You need me for this?”  Bucky asked. “I was going to do some investigating today--”

            “I can handle drop off.  Worst case scenario, I’ll set off my panic button,” Steve said as he opened the door.  “I’ll see you later.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Feel free to call if anything seems off.”

            “Will do,” Steve said as he was holding the door open for his small armada of children.  Steve walked out, holding Jamie who was still playing with his toy and probably didn’t even realize that he was being moved to another location.

            The moment the door closed, Barton moved next to him.  “What are we investigating, Sarge?”

            “Us?  Nothing,” Bucky said.  “I just want to be sure before I bring you in on this.  Keep an eye on our itsie bitsie spider?” He motioned over to Sarah.

            “No problem,” Clint said.  “You still think she’s involved?”

            Bucky shook his head uncertainly.  “I don’t know who’s involved and who isn’t anymore.  For all I know the baby’s been harboring the tech all this time.”

            “All right,” Clint said.  “I’ll keep a close eye on Sarah while you follow this hunch.”

            “I’m gonna head out for a bit.  If I need back up--”

            “I’ll be waiting by the phone,” Clint said with a nod.

            Bucky went upstairs and grabbed his stuff.  He hadn’t properly investigated anyone of interest in this case in a while, but this morning, he seemed to get two suspects for the price of one.  He’d been too worried about ruffling feathers with the grief that he was so willing to overlook a key suspect. Pepper Potts. She’d been around all the time when Bucky had first moved in, then she stopped coming around altogether.  Sure, Steve seemed to chalk it all up to grief, and Bucky was happy enough to buy into that, but it didn’t really add up. The more involved Bucky became, the scarcer Pepper made herself.

            Bucky headed down the steps and made his way out the door.  He got into his car and made his way over to Stark Industries.  He had set up surveillance there when he was first assigned to this job, but it was mostly as a precaution.  Strike teams had been in and out of the building searching for anything that could lead them to JARVIS before Bucky had even showed up.  He’d done a quick sweep of the building and set up bugs and cameras for his own benefit. It was mostly just to make sure that Potts didn’t have some super secret passageway or something that they missed during their initial visits.  Nothing. It had all been a massive waste of time. That said, Bucky didn’t think much of the Stark Industries bugs that he’d left once he stopped paying attention to them. He never thought to go back in and remove them, and that might just prove to be fruitful for him.

            Bucky pulled into the lot and parked over to the side.  He pulled his tablet out and patched himself into the feed.  Potts was in her office and she was alone. She seemed to just be focusing on some paperwork.  Bucky zoomed in as far as the camera would allow. It was just some contract that she was looking over.

            This wasn’t going to be like Carter.  He wasn’t going to see Potts doing something mundane and just move on.  He knew that there was a former intern that she’d be meeting with at some point in the day, and intern that left around the same time was Stark’s death.  They’d likely discuss it in some capacity. This was good. He could work with this.

            He stayed there watching.  He monitored Pepper’s two hour conference call.  He monitored her going through job applications for a personal assistant.  He watched her every move. What was Pepper Potts hiding?

            A few hours in, he saw something that he wasn’t expecting in the parking lot.  Clint and Sarah. Sarah was marching into the building and she looked like she was ready for a fight.  Clint glanced over and made eye contact with Bucky. His jaw went slack and he motioned to Sarah. Clint didn’t know that Bucky was looking into Stark Industries, but this could be an interesting day after all.

            Bucky watched the surveillance and saw Sarah practically waltz her way through the lobby.  It was incredible. This girl, however anyone felt about her, could move mountains with her confidence.  It was impressive. She really would be an incredible politician one day, he just wasn’t sure if he’d ever vote for her.

            She practically barged into Pepper’s office once she got to the top floor.  Pepper looked up at her startled. She was not expecting to see Sarah. Bucky turned up the volume.  He did not want to miss a word of this interaction.

            “Sarah?” Pepper clutched her chest a bit dramatically.  “What a surprise. I wasn’t expecting--”

            “What the hell is going on with you?” Sarah put her hands on her hips.  It was almost comical. Sarah was practically berating Potts who was the CEO of the company.

            “I beg your pardon--”

            “Don’t play dumb.  You and I both know you are _not_ dumb,” Sarah said with an icy tone.  “You’ve been keeping your distance and I want to know why.”

            Pepper looked down at her desk and swallowed.  She took a moment before looking back to Sarah.  “Sarah… I don’t know what you’re talking about--”

            “Stop.  Don’t do that.  I admired you my whole life. Don’t diminish that by playing stupid,” Sarah spat.  “I haven’t seen you since the funeral. Not at Thanksgiving, not at Christmas, and definitely not since I’ve been home.  I could have used my _aunt_.”

            “I’m sorry,” Pepper said after a moment.  “Maybe I’m just not as strong as you made me out to be in your head--”

            Sarah shook her head.  “Let’s not forget who you’re dealing with.  My dad may have named you CEO, but we still have majority shares in the company.  I’ve been working closely with my father on almost every major project from the tender age of eleven.”

            “What are you implying?” Pepper asked, her face beginning to redden.

            “Just listen, _Aunt Pepper._  I know for a fact that this company has not had a major idea or breakthrough since my father passed.  That’s probably why you’re reaching to any tech company that’ll give you the time of day. Justin Hammer?  Aldrich Killian? Even resorting to old interns like Peter Parker--”

            “How do you--” Pepper looked more confused than anything.

            “This company is my birthright.  I’ve been paying attention, _Aunt Pepper_ ,” her tone was almost menacing. This was a different Sarah than he’d ever seen, but it wasn’t surprising.  Just new. This was Tony Stark’s daughter. She could be cut throat if the occasion called for it.

            Pepper just stared at her.  “Are you finished?”

            “Not even close,” Sarah sneered.  “My father appointed you head of the company for one reason and one reason only.  You’re family. Unless you want a hostile takeover on your hands you might want to start acting like family again, Aunt Pepper.  I’d hate to see a coup.”

            “Sarah--”

            “Howie and I studied under my father for years, I bet even Maria could give you some ideas for a new product.  Don’t outsource to the likes of Killian and Hammer. Don’t soil my father’s legacy with their lackluster products,” Sarah said with disgust.  “It’d also be nice to let your _niece_ know that her ex is gonna be in town, or was that just another attempt to try and distance me from this place?”

            “Sarah,” Pepper said, standing up from her desk.  “This is wildly inappropriate.”

            Sarah crossed her arms and momentarily raised her eyebrows.  “You’re one to talk about appropriate. You think I didn’t see all the looks?  You were in love with my father and he was in love with someone else. Is that why you hung around?  Now that he’s gone there’s no need to hang around us anymore, right? There’s no chance we’ll be your step kids now.  No way that my dad will wake up and realize that you’re the one--”

            “You are out of line,” Pepper said, keeping her cool.  “You father and I were partners professionally. There was nothing else going on--”

            “Because my dad was in love with one person and one person only… Steve Rogers.  I may not understand how two people so different were so in love, but they were.  Maybe you realized that, and that’s why you bounced. Maybe you couldn’t live with seeing how devastated my Pa was when my dad passed.  Maybe you were just like everyone else who thought Dad only like Pa because he was younger and attractive and that Pa was just in it for the money--”

            “I’d never!” Pepper said, sounding offended and shocked.  “Sarah, your father and I were professionals. I never thought anything--”

            “Then what is it?” Sarah asked, still sounding mostly indifferent.  “Why did you bail?”

            “Tony was my family--”

            “So were we,” Sarah spat.

            “Let me finish,” Pepper said calmly.  “Tony was the only family I had for a long time. I was married to my work, and Tony was my boss.  I’d be lying if I said there wasn’t a crush at one point, but that’s all it was. When he was around Steve, he lit up like a Christmas tree.  I accepted that was it for him, and I was fine with being a friend. Then the kids came around and I loved each and every one of you as if you were one of my own.  The fact is, something we developed here got him killed, and I didn’t see it coming from a mile away. I could have axed the military deal at any point, and I didn’t.  I didn’t even think that this could be dangerous for him. Seeing how hurt everyone was… I blamed myself. I know it was cowardly, but I couldn’t live with that.”

            Sarah shook her head.  “Well, you’re gonna have to learn how.  My family has lost more than you could ever know, and we can’t lose you too.  My brothers and sisters _miss_ you.  I’m an adult.  I can handle losing things, and people.  However, my siblings have lost enough.” Sarah’s tone was deadly and Bucky wouldn’t want to be in Pepper’s shoes.

            Pepper looked down.  “I didn’t mean to cause more trouble.”

            “Then stop.  Harrison is graduating from preschool in a few days.  I know it’s silly. He can count to ten and barely knows how to mix colors, but he’s excited about it, and I know Papa invited you.  If I were you, I’d make sure I was there. Otherwise you might have an ambush on your hands. Let’s be clear, I don’t think the shareholders would go against Tony Stark’s children, that still have a majority share in the company, and have been contributing here since they were in diapers.  It’s not the best PR look,” Sarah said venomously.

            Pepper gave her an exasperated look.  “Sarah--”

            “Look, be there or don’t be there,” Sarah said, looking at her nails uninterestedly.  “I just wanted to make sure that you knew where we stand.”

            Pepper sat back down in her seat.  “You’ve made yourself very clear.”

            “Good,” Sarah said as she turned on her heel and made her way out the door.  Clint was standing next to the door. He’d been uncharacteristically quiet throughout this entire exchange, and Bucky didn’t blame him.  One thing was clear--if Potts was behind this, Sarah was not involved.

            Sarah walked out the door and Clint followed behind her.  Sarah pushed the button for the elevator and Bucky watched on.  Maybe the confrontation with Pepper was just to get access into the building.  Maybe she’s make her way down to Tony’s workshop in the basement or something. There was no telling what was going on when Sarah was involved.

            As the elevator door opened, Sarah wasn’t paying attention and walked right into the young man that was exiting.  “I’m so sorry--” She began, before stopping.

            “Sarah?” The young man asked.  He stopped dead in his tracks and just stared at her.  “You look…”

            “How are you, Peter?” she asked, not giving him a chance to finish.

            He began gesturing as he spoke.  “Not too great. I heard about your dad, and I meant to reach out.  I just didn’t know what to say.”

            She smiled tightly at that.  “Something. Hell, you could have said anything, he loved you like you were his own.”

            Peter nodded.  “I know. I should have called or…”

            “You could have told me you were going to be in town too,” Sarah said, looking away for a moment.  “Not that it really matters. It’s not like we’re together or anything.”

            Peter glanced around before dropping his voice.  “That wasn’t exactly my choice, Sarah.”

            Sarah shook her head.  “Well I guess now I have the answer.  I was only interesting when I was Tony Stark’s daughter.”

            Peter gave her a look.  “Can we talk about this in private?  I never--”

            “I don’t think that I really have anything else to say.” Sarah put her arm out to stop the elevator door from closing.  “You look well. Good luck in there. I hear she’s really looking for something new. If you can give her a few worthwhile ideas, I’m sure she’ll offer you something.”

            “Should I even bother going in there?” Peter asked. “She’s your aunt--”

            Sarah shrugged.  “It’s starting to feel less and less like that.  It’s funny, Dad always said family could be so disappointing.  I didn’t think he meant the family he chose. But here we are.”

            Peter looked down as she got in the elevator.  “Sarah, you look good. This place… you always wore it well.  The girl who would be queen, right?”

            “No need for flattery, Parker.  I have no say in this decision… but thank you.  It always felt like home,” Sarah said as she hit the button for the lobby.

            Bucky knew it would have been too easy for her to go down to the basement.  Besides, Clint was with her. Sarah was smart. She wouldn’t lead Clint to the super secret tech, no matter how close the two had gotten.

            He couldn’t keep watching Sarah.  There was a good chance that Pepper and Parker were colluding.  That was the whole point of him coming down there in the first place.  It made perfect sense. Parker wasn’t on the payroll, he was an unpaid intern.  No one would have looked into him because he wasn’t on the books.

            “Peter,” Pepper greeted him warmly as she stood up from her desk and gave him a hug.  It was strange. She didn’t greet her niece like this. Still, Sarah had come in like hell on wheels and didn’t give her much time to react.

            “Ms. Potts,” Peter said excitedly.  “Thank you so much for meeting with me.”

            “Please,” Pepper waved dismissively as she motioned for Peter to take a seat.  She crossed over and resumed sitting behind the desk. “Tony would have never forgiven me if I let his protege slip through the cracks.”

            Peter smiled, but looked confused.  “I always thought that Sarah or Howie would have been his ‘protege,’ not that I’m trying to distance myself or anything.  It’s just they’re his kids and all. I saw Sarah on my way in… I figured that she was still working here and everything--”

            Pepper shook her head.  “Sarah hasn’t actually been in here much.  Between college and everything with Tony… this is probably one of the first times she’s been down here since he passed.”

Peter’s face faltered a bit.  “Oh. It’s hard to imagine this place without either Sarah or Howie.  Has he been around much?”

            Pepper shook her head.  “No, but you know how demanding junior year of high school can be.  Besides, it’s not as if Tony still has any old blueprints or anything for them to work on in here.  The feds took all his stuff right after he died. Apparently, they didn’t find what they were looking for, but we haven’t gotten any of the other stuff back yet.”

            Peter frowned.  “That sucks. I’m sure that Howie and Sarah would have liked to see some of those projects through.”

            Pepper nodded.  “My heart breaks for them.  The fact is, I don’t know how to be there for them, you know?  How do you look at someone who’s lost everything and begin to know how to help.”

            Peter looked away.  “Ms. Potts, I lost my parents when I was really young, and then after that, my Uncle who was… .  I think it just helps to let them know that you’re there. I probably wanted to call over a dozen times, but I didn’t know what to say… I didn’t know if they’d even want to hear from me.”

            Pepper took a deep breath.  “Happier thoughts?”

            “Yes, please,” Peter said, sounding relieved.  

            “Stark Industries is looking for new, fresh talent!” Pepper exclaimed excitedly.  “As someone who’s already worked for us, and _very_ closely with Tony Stark, we thought it was natural to extend an invitation for you to interview with us.”  Sarah was right, Potts must have been desperate to have someone with ideas if she was _inviting_ people to interview with one of the largest companies in the industry.

            “Wow,” Peter said excitedly.  “I thought this was just about my college credit being lost or something since Mr. Stark… you know.”

            “No, no,” Pepper said dismissively.  “We took care of all that. The fact is Peter, we don’t want Tony’s legacy at this company to have been stolen by the government.  I know that you were a key contributor to a lot of these projects. We were-- _I_ was hoping you might have enough… knowledge about some of these projects to… help us recreate them.”

            Peter paused.  “I’m sorry? This is all very… thank you, Ms. Potts-- I just don’t know if I’m the one who--”

            “Don’t be modest,” Pepper’s face practically lit up.  She stood up from her desk and moved the other side. She took a seat on the edge of the desk so that she was practically towering over Peter who was just sitting in his chair.  Was there anyone involved in this family that wasn’t manipulative? This woman just got reamed by her niece not fifteen minutes prior and she was acting as if nothing had happened.  “You were an important member of the Stark Industries _family_.  You worked closely with Tony.”

            She looked down and took a deep breath.  “Listen, I didn’t want to go here, but Sarah and Howie… it’s too much for them to be here.  I can’t ask them for something like this. Can you imagine how hard it would be on them if they couldn’t contribute in the same way… or if they failed?  Peter, you’re our _first_ choice here.”

            Peter looked up, his face became much more stern.  “Which project?” He was no longer the nervous kid that was stumbling over his words.

            Pepper nodded approvingly.  “Project Insight.”

            Peter raised an eyebrow.  “Ms. Potts, I was barely involved in that project--”

            “But you knew enough about it,” she said matter-of-factly.  “You _were_ very involved in the JARVIS prototype.  Insight must be a walk in the park compared to JARVIS.”

            Peter looked at her strangely.  “I’m not looking to… recreate Mr. Stark’s work… anything I could do with it would be a cheap imitation, not a continuation of his legacy.  I learned a lot from Mr. Stark. I think that I’d be able to honor him by working on some… novel ideas and inventions. I know he spoke about working on some of my own prototypes that I had been working on.”

            Pepper tensed at that.  “Who’s to say you can’t work on both?  I think that there’s room for lots of production here, Peter.  We’d like to just release one last “Tony Stark” product before moving on.  From what I could tell, the project that would be most… manageable would be Insight.  After that, I’d love to fund one of your prototypes and go on from there.”

            Peter nodded as he bit his lip.  “How involved is the family? I don’t want to step on any toes.”

            Pepper waved that thought away.  “This is the first time I’ve seen any of them down here since the funeral.  Naturally, they’re welcome. This is as much their company as it is mine--hell, more so.  Their name is on the door, after all.” She stood back up and went back behind her desk and scribbled something down on it.  Bucky zoomed in, but she was too quick. He couldn’t make out what had been written down.

            She walked back over to Peter and handed him the paper.  “This is my offer. Think on it. We’d be happy to have you, and I think you’d be lucky to continue your work here.”

            Peter took a quick glance at it, before folding it up again.  “This is-- ”

            “Think about it,” Pepper said confidently.  “How long are you in town for?” She sat down behind her desk, crossing her legs.

            “A week,” Peter said.  He was still just looking at the folded piece of paper in his hands.  

            Pepper nodded.  “Give me a call--regardless of what you decide.  Even if you choose to continue in a different path, I’d be happy to write a letter of recommendation.”

            “Thank you, Ms. Potts.”  Peter stood up and extended his hand to shake hers.

            She stood up to match him and waved his hand away as she opened her arms.  She hugged him tightly, and Bucky could _see_ her whisper into his ear.  No matter how hard he tried to enhance the volume, he could not make it out.   _Shit!_

            Peter just gave a nod, before he made his way out of her office.  He knew something. This kid had to know something. He had worked on the JARVIS project, and Pepper Potts had just sent him some sort a message right as Bucky was watching.  Maybe he was the key.

            Bucky watched Peter leave the building and he did something pretty bold.  He got out of the car and made his way over to the main entrance, he brushed against the kid, and made sure to hide his face.  He mumbled a quick “Sorry,” as he entered the building.

            He walked over to the front desk to seem a little inconspicuous.  

            “Can I help you?” The young lady at the desk asked.

            Bucky glanced out the window.  Peter was already getting back into his car, not paying any attention to Bucky in the slightest.

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah, I just needed some help getting back to the freeway.  I’m new in town and I’m afraid I got myself a little turned around.”

            She smiled politely at him.  “You just go up the road half a mile.” She pointed in the right direction.  “After that, you’ll just have to determine whether you’re going north or south.”

            Bucky bit his lip.  “I’m sorry, is Malibu north or south?”  He gave a nervous laugh.

            She laughed back.  “Actually, you’ll need to head west.  If you take that same road to the third traffic light and make a right, you should see an option for east and west.”

            Bucky shook her hand politely.  “Thank you so much. I swear, I’ve got no sense of direction, but my fiance just _had_ to road trip across the continental US.”

            She giggled again.  “Well I hope you enjoy your trip.”

            Bucky waved back to her as he made his way out of the building.  He got back into his car and pulled something out of his pocket. The small piece of paper that Potts had handed Parker.  It was a number--no, it was a price point. $750,000. What the hell? Was this a salary offer? If so, that was well above the average rate.  Parker would have just been an engineer or developer. He wouldn’t be doing the same level of work that Stark had and even if he had… this was not a starting salary.  It couldn’t be. Potts must have either been _really_ desperate to get someone in for this position, or she needed Parker for something specific.

            Bucky didn’t have time to think too far into this yet.  There were still a lot of moving pieces here. He turned the car on and made his way back to the house.

            After sitting in traffic for about an hour, he finally made his way home.  He let himself into the house and tried to make his way over to his bedroom.  However, he was stopped by Jamie.

            “Buck!” Jamie tossed a block at him.  “Peas. Help.”

            Bucky glanced over to the set of towers that Jamie was making.  Well he was learning. It was definitely an improvement from the one large tower that he had been working on earlier in the day.

            “It looks so good,” Bucky said excitedly, almost immediately forgetting about what he’d been investigating.  “What do you need help with? You’re doing such a good job.”

            “Boo?” Jamie crossed his arms and pouted.

            Bucky glanced around the carpet.  “Yeah, I’m not seeing anymore blue blocks, buddy.  What about green? I see a lot of green over here.”

            “Boo!” Jamie stomped his foot.

            “Hey, stranger.” Steve came over to him, clapping him on the shoulder.  “Busy day?”

            Bucky shrugged.  “Just looking into a hunch.  Nothing for you to worry about.”

            “Pa!” Jamie yelled.  “Boo block!”

            Steve pinched the bridge of his nose for a moment as he crouched down to Jamie’s level.  “All gone! Jamie, look!” Steve pointed at the seven little blue towers that Jamie had already built.  “You used all the blue ones. Make Papa a green one! I _love_ green!”

            Jamie’s sour puss face disappeared and he grinned.  “Gree for Papa.”

            “Thanks, baby!” Steve said ruffled Jamie’s hair and stood back up.  He turned back to Bucky. “You think you’ll be here for dinner? Maria is working on her last recipe from Cooking Club.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah, I’m pretty much done for the day.  I’ve just gotta go status with Barton real quick, and then if you need anything I’m all yours.”

            “Thanks,” Steve said.  “You think this may lead you to JARVIS?  I know we’ll all rest easy once this thing is out of our hair.”

            Bucky didn’t know why but that stung.  It was foolish to think that Steve would be happy with this arrangement.  He still had some stranger in his house and his kids were still less than safe as a result, but still… Bucky had begun to like this arrangement.  He sort of assumed Steve didn’t mind it so much anymore either.

            He shrugged.  “Too soon to tell.  If anything comes up, I’ll keep you posted.  I’m probably just being a little paranoid. Old habits.”

            “Okay,” Steve said, sounding uninterested again.  “Let me know if you need any help. We appreciate everything, so if we can help at all…”

            “Thanks,” Bucky said.  “I’ll keep that in mind.”  He motioned over to the steps.  “Excuse me a second?”

            “Of course,” Steve said and put his hands up apologetically.  “Let me get out of your hair.”

            Bucky smiled politely as mae his way up the stairs.  He walked over to Barton’s room and knocked on the door.  Clint peered out the door, and opened it wider when he made eye contact with Bucky.

            “Hey, Sarge.  Come on in.” Clint moved out of the way and let Bucky through.  “Listen, I had no idea you were at Stark Industries, otherwise I would have given you a heads up that Sarah wanted to head down there.”

            “It’s fine,” Bucky said honestly.  “Actually, it was better than fine.  She didn’t know I was there, right?”

            Clint shook his head.  “No, she didn’t know. At least, if she noticed, then she didn’t mention it to me.  Honestly, with everything that went down in there… I think you must have been the last thing on her mind.”

            Bucky made a face.  “Yeah, she was on a mission in there.”

            Clint gave him a look.  “That’s putting it mildly.  She was…”

            “Ruthless,” Bucky finished for him.  “It was something to see. She… I never know what to think with that one.  Part of me thought that it was emotional… almost like a loose cannon. That said, the more I think about it, the more calculated it seemed.  She _blackmailed_ her, and Potts didn’t seem to have a counter.”

            “She’s smart… and calculating,” Clint agreed.  “That said, she’s still human. There can be emotion behind all that too.  But no, she’s not a loose canon. That was definitely something she’d been thinking about for a while.”

            “Well, she’s not exactly my suspect right now,” Bucky confessed.  “Has she ever mentioned that kid before today?”

            Clint shook his head.  “No. I didn’t exactly ask for a romantic history.  I kept my distance at first, remember?”

            “Nor would I have thought to have you ask that,” Bucky said truthfully.  “I didn’t think her romantic partners would have been of any interest… until today.”

            That seemed to pique Barton’s interest.  “Yeah? What do you think that kid’s got to do with this?”

            “I’m not sure yet.  All I know is, after that encounter in the hall, he went on to have an even more interesting conversation with Ms. Pepper Potts,” Bucky said honestly.

            “I thought you weren’t going to involve me until you knew more,” Barton said.  “You think he’s got JARVIS?”

            Bucky shook his head.  “I wouldn’t go that far.  Not yet. The fact of the matter is, I need your help.  You read lips right?”

            Clint motioned to the hearing aids in his ear.  “Yup. That and ASL work as a great fail safe.”

            Bucky nodded as he pulled out his tablet.  “There was this bit in the meeting with Parker and Potts.  I couldn’t make out what she said to him. I was hoping you might be able to shed some light on the situation.”

            Clint nodded.  “Let me see what you’ve got.”

            Bucky pulled up the footage from Stark Industries.  He brought up the conversation between Peter and Pepper.  He handed Clint the tablet. “She’s gonna whisper something into his ear when he goes to leave.”

            “Copy,” Clint said as he watched the footage closely.  After a few rewinds, Clint handed him the tablet back. “She said something about Stark.  The rest is… it’s hard to tell. She did it quick and barely moved her mouth. But I think she said something about making Stark proud?  Sorry, Sarge. It’s not exactly a smoking gun.”

            Bucky sighed.  He wasn’t sure what he was expecting.  It would have been too easy for Potts to confess anything to Parker right there in the office.  “No, it’s not. But we know he’s valuable to her. I just have to figure out why.”

            “You think Potts might be involved too?” Barton asked.

            “I think… I can’t exactly rule anyone out.  We’ve been here for almost ten months, and we’ve come up with jackshit.  It’s only a matter of time before Pierce sends someone else in,” Bucky said frustratedly.  

            Clint paused, watching him closely.  “And you’d be… against that?”

            “Would you be okay leaving Sarah in someone else’s hands?” Bucky asked.  “I don’t think that there is anyone else who would take his job as seriously as we are--”

            “Which part?” Clint asked.  “The protection or securing JARVIS?  I think we may be keeping them safest, but I don’t think we’ve been actively looking for the tech either.”

            Bucky took a deep breath.  “Which part do you think is the priority?”

            “To us?” Clint asked with an eyebrow raise.  “Or to the government? I think that there are two very different answers to that question.”

            Bucky nodded.  Clint was right.  Pierce probably couldn’t care less about the safety of the family.  This was likely _all_ about JARVIS from where he stood.  They had to get a move on, Pierce wasn’t going to standby indefinitely while they played house.

            “I’m gonna go talk to Howie.  Maybe, he’ll know something about this Parker kid,” Bucky said, putting his hands on his hips.  “Maybe he could at least tell me what the hell this Project Insight is.”

            “You don’t want me to ask Sarah?” Clint suggested.

            “I think that kid’s a bit of a sore spot for her,” Bucky said honestly.  “Also, I’m not so sure that the entire thing wasn’t just for your benefit, to throw us off a scent.”

            “You really don’t trust her,” Clint said with a laugh.  “I’m telling you, Sarge. She’s a pretty good kid.”

            Bucky shrugged.  “I always feel like I’m at least one step behind her.  Like I said, I don’t really trust any of them.”

            “You trust Howie enough to ask him,” Barton pointed out.

            “I’m not going to give him any details.  I’ll just ask about Insight and probe about Parker a little bit.  That’s it. He seems to be a little more trusting than Sarah is.”

            Barton nodded.  “Okay. Let me know if you need anything else.”

            “Will do,” Bucky said honestly.  “I think we’re getting closer, Barton.”

            Barton made a face.  “I’ll believe it when I see it, Sarge.”

            Bucky didn’t blame him.  This wouldn’t be his first hunch that didn’t work out.  He walked out of the room and walked over to Howie’s bedroom.  He knocked on the door and waited patiently.

            “What?” Howie groaned from the other side of the door.

            “I just had a quick question,” Bucky called back.  He was sure that Howie probably didn’t think that Bucky was the one looking for him.

            Howie opened the door, he looked confused.  “Everything okay, Sarge?”  
            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah, I was just hoping that you might be able to help me out with something.”

            Howie nodded back as he opened the door wider.  Howie’s room was far neater than Barton’s was. Everything was perfectly organized, and it was impressive.  Howie took a seat at the foot of his bed and Bucky took a seat at the desk chair. “What’s going on? Is everything okay?”

            “Yeah,” Bucky said honestly.  “I’m just… I wanted your opinion on some stuff.”

            Howie didn’t look convinced.  “You’ve never asked me about… anything before.”

            “I didn’t want to involve anyone unless I had to.  I have just a couple of miniscule questions that I thought you could answer.  You used to help out at your dad’s company right?” Bucky pressed.

            “Yeah,” Howie said.  “Not as much as Sarah but… yeah.”

            Bucky shrugged.  “Cool. I was going through some files and I saw this… Project Insight mentioned a few times.  Was that at all related to JARVIS or something?”

            Howie snorted.  “Definitely not.  Project Insight was a failed navigation project.  It was supposed to work like a GPS, but… it was glitchy and Dad didn’t care enough to continue on with it.”

            “I can’t picture your dad working on a GPS,” Bucky said, mostly to himself.

            Howie laughed.  “Well, it wasn’t.  Not a typical GPS. It was designed for… well, parents.  All they’d have to say is “I need directions to ‘insert kid’s name here’” and voila! The problem was, if the kid moved or was in a car or something the device couldn’t differentiate.  We were also worried that there could be stalking applications or that someone could hack it and find anyone they wanted. We scrapped the thing and called it a day.”

            Bucky sighed.  “Cool, and who worked on this project?”

            Howie shook his head uncertainly.  “I don’t know. It didn’t really get off the ground.  It was mostly Dad, Sarah… me and… I don’t know, I think a couple of the interns might have helped out.  It really wasn’t a big project and we scrapped it pretty early on. Not all of Dad’s ideas were winners.”

            “Any interns specifically?” Bucky pressed.

            “I don’t remember,” Howie said scratching his head.  “I’d bet that Aunt Pepper has a list or something. I bet I could ask--”

            “No, that’s okay,” Bucky cut him off.  “It’s probably nothing anyway. If you happen to remember who might have worked on it--”

            “I don’t know,” Howie said as he put his hands in his head.  “That was probably about two--maybe three summers ago. I think there was a girl… Gwen something, and--oh!” He snapped his fingers.  “Peter Parker. I think that was his first year interning with us. I don’t know how much time he actually spent on that project specifically, but I’m sure he helped out on it.”

            “Did either of these interns help out on any other projects?” Bucky asked, trying not to make it seem too important.

            Howie nodded.  “Yeah, I’m sure they did.  Gwen only interned the one year, and then she decided to focus on Biochem, so she moved on.  Peter interned the following two summers too. Dad saw him as his… apprentice or something. He worked on tons of projects with us.  Insight was probably one of them… I’d bet money he helped out on JARVIS too.”

            “Was he… more involved with JARVIS than he was with Insight?” Bucky asked.

            “Probably, but only up until the government bought JARVIS.  Once JARVIS was purchased, there was a very specific list of people who had access.  I’m sure none of this is news to you. I highly doubt that Peter was on that list. I barely made the cut.”  Howie scooted back on the bed a bit. “Last summer… I think Peter was working more on the Jupiter Watch. Yeah, I think that was his project he was overseeing.  The government had bought JARVIS before he came back last summer.”

            “What’s the Jupiter Watch?” Bucky asked, genuinely curious.

            “It was the SmartWatch to end all SmartWatches.  It was virtually indestructible. It functioned on its own—there was no need for a phone or anything, this watch could be its own phone.  It was untraceable, it had service almost everywhere. It was even bulletproof. I know Dad had high hopes for it. It was another product he was hoping to sell to the military.  Once he passed, production just stopped on it,” Howie said. “We thought it just got lost in the purge, when they came and cleaned out the workshop.”

            Bucky took a deep breath.  “And this… Parker kid oversaw the whole thing?”

            Howie nodded again.  “Yeah, Dad trusted him as if he was one of us.  Hell, the dude worshipped the ground Dad walked on.”

            “Did he come to the funeral?” Bucky asked.

            Howie shook his head.  “No, he was back in New York by then.  Besides, he and Sarah had a history. He didn’t want to make things harder for her.”

            “You still talk to him?” Bucky prompted.

            “From time to time.  I’m not exactly his best friend, but he’s a nice enough guy.  It’s just weird seeing someone worship your parents like that.  I was never really sure if he wanted to hang out with me or hang out with Tony Stark’s son.  Not that he wasn’t nice or anything, it’s just hard to know when they idolize your parents,” Howie said.  “Did any of this help… at all?”

            Bucky shrugged.  “I don’t know. I’m just trying to figure out which way is up.  Thanks, though. I appreciate it.”

            “Yeah,” Howie responded with a bewildered look on his face.  “Let me know if you have any more questions… I guess.”

            Bucky made his way over to the bedroom door.  “Will do. Thanks again.” Bucky gave the door a light knock before the closed it behind him.  If Howie was telling the truth, then Project Insight was nothing but a desperate cash grab being orchestrated by Potts.  Oddly enough, it certainly tracked with what Sarah was saying in the office to Pepper earlier in the day. Maybe she really was just desperate for this Parker kid to join her ranks.  Maybe not. He couldn’t rule out the possibility that there was something more to this either. Not yet anyway.

 

_Status Report: The Day of Harrison’s Graduation_

            The next few days were relatively uneventful.  Bucky was monitoring Pepper Potts as much as he could without making himself too scarce from the home.  That usually meant heading over to Stark Industries when the kids were out at school for a few hours. With the exception of the first day, there wasn’t much that was going on.  Potts was up to typical CEO things--conference calls, paperwork, job interviews, mass emails, etc. There really wasn’t much to report on.

            That said, Barton had been right about one thing.  Pierce was now asking for detailed reports about what they had discovered.  The fact was, they really hadn’t discovered much of anything in the near ten months that they’d been with the family.  It wasn’t exactly a proud data point, but he was hoping the fact that they’d managed to keep them safe would be significant enough to keep them from getting into hot water.

            For the time being, Bucky had settled on sending Pierce excessively detailed reports about everything that he was observing from Potts.  He’d even asked Barton to look more closely into the Parker kid. Unfortunately, they both seemed squeaky clean on paper, making it much more difficult for Bucky to even justify the level of interest that he was taking in the two of them.  The facts remained, Pepper owned the company that originally developed JARVIS, and Peter Parker had done work on the tech. Those two details alone justified his presence, at least it did in Bucky’s eyes… he just hoped that Pierce saw things the same way.

            Friday was different.  Friday was Harrison’s preschool graduation and Bucky wasn’t missing it, high volume event with the whole family in the same place--it was too risky to let them go on without him.  Besides, he was pretty sure that Pepper was going to be in attendance. She had cleared her schedule for the day after her encounter with Sarah, and she didn’t appear to be taking the girl’s threats lightly.  He could kill two birds with one stone this way.

            He’d spent most of the morning at the school.  He was trying to make sure that there would be no surprises.  They’d essentially be sitting ducks if anyone had decided to make a move on them there.  Clint was currently taking over things at the house, and they’d be meeting him there soon.

            He heard someone clear their throat.  Bucky turned around to see Peggy standing in the entryway of the auditorium.  “You’re a bit early.”

            Bucky shrugged.  “Didn’t want to be late.”

            She crossed her arms, as she walked over to where he was standing.  “I didn’t think that the administration was letting anyone in yet.”

            “No one gave me any problems,” Bucky said honestly.  He wasn’t sure how much Steve had told her about his role--if anything at all.  For all he knew, she still just thought he was a friend of the family.

            She nodded.  “They’re all doing all right?”

            “Yeah,” Bucky said.  “They’re doing pretty well.  I know Steve took the breakup pretty hard.”

            She raised her eyebrow for a moment but didn’t say anything.  “You probably think so little of me… to pursue him so soon after his husband--”

            “I don’t think anything,” Bucky said.  “I think that there is no protocol for situations like this, and that you made him happy--happier than he had been for a while.  I think that wounds like that feel better until they don’t. I’m sorry you got caught in that. I think you were good for him.”

            She laughed bitterly at that.  “Forgive me if I don’t believe you.  I never got the impression that you liked me very much.”

            “I didn’t--I never--I worried he was rushing into things and that he would get hurt.  I wasn’t exactly wrong either. If it had been later on, then I think things would have been different for you too,” Bucky said, and it tasted like vinegar in his mouth.  The idea of Steve married to Peggy and her helping raise those kids made him more envious than he dared to admit.

            Peggy looked down at her feet.  “I suppose that makes sense. I just always got the impression that I wasn’t the only one who wanted a shot with him.”

            Bucky shook his head.  “It’s not like that. I’m just helping out.  This way Howie can be a freaking kid, and Steve isn’t stuck with six kids on his own.  That’s all. Everything between us is platonic.”

            She didn’t look convinced.  “I was just hoping… that poor family deserves to be happy.”

            “They do,” Bucky agreed.  “I think it’s just going to take time.”

            “Naturally,” Peggy said sadly.  “Anyway.” She stood up straight.  “I hope you enjoy the ceremony today.  They always look so darling in their caps and gowns.”

            Bucky couldn’t help but crack a smile at that.  Harrison was so excited for his graduation, and Bucky could just imagine him in the oversized gown with a cap.  That kid was going to be his downfall.

            “Those kids are very lucky to have so many people who love them,” Peggy said as she turned around and made her way back over to the exit.  “Harrison never stops talking about you.”

            “They’re good kids,” Bucky said honestly.  “They’ll be okay. It’s just going to take them some time to get used to their new normal.”

            Peggy didn’t respond.  He didn’t think that there was much for either of them to say anyway.

            He was finishing securing the auditorium.  Everything looked to be as safe as possible, and he wasn’t too concerned.  Hurting them here wouldn’t bring Hydra any closer to JARVIS. Still, he’d double checked everything.  Bucky felt comfortable… they could get through this afternoon.

            Bucky felt something push up against his left calf.  He looked down to see Jamie looking up to him, he was hugging onto his leg.  “Buck!”

            Bucky grinned down at him.  He looked back up and saw Steve walking into the auditorium with the other kids.  

            “Hey,” Bucky said as he picked Jamie up from the floor.  He was dressed in an adorable little outfit that had to be uncomfortable.  He was wearing blue corduroy suspenders, with a plaid button down shirt and a little artist cap.  Bucky had to stop from laughing. There was no way that was gonna last.

            “Hi,” Steve said, his eyes were puffy and red.  It was clear that this was more emotional for him than Bucky had anticipated.  Maybe he should have asked Barton to secure the auditorium instead.

            Sarah’s heels clicked as she entered the auditorium with Clint following behind her.  “We dropped Harrison at the classroom. He was still talking like his life depended on it.”

            “He’s probably not gonna shut up today.” Howie groaned as he sat down in one of the folding chairs.

            “Let him be excited,” Maria said as she sat down next to Howie.  “When’s the last time any of us have been that excited about anything?”

            “ _I_ think it’s exciting,” Talia said matter of factly as she crossed her arms.  “Harrison is going to kindergarten next year! He’s getting big. It’s a big deal.”

            AJ nodded along.  “I can’t wait for us to start reading together!  I think he’ll like _The Magic Treehouse_!  I’ve been reading him some of the chapters from there, but he gets too distracted right now.”

            Steve laughed at that.  “Yeah, well, he’ll be five in a few days.  Distracted comes with the territory.”

            “Who else is coming today?” Maria asked as AJ plopped down in the chair next to her, Talia following suit.

            “Uncle Sam and Uncle Riley,” Steve said as he took Jamie from Bucky.  

Jamie whined and swatted at Steve’s hands. “Buck!”

            Steve rolled his eyes.  “Bucky needs a break, Jamie.”

            “Down!  Pa! Down, peas!” Jamie yelled.

            Steve sighed as he put Jamie down on the ground, watching him intently.  “Stay close, Jamie.”

            Jamie paid him little mind, he just went over to Sarah and climbed up on her lap.  Steve seemed to be relieved that Jamie just wasn’t wandering all over the place. Bucky personally thought that Steve should consider getting a child leash for that one.  Jamie was proving to be a runner, and while Steve was fast enough to catch him, they still had to pay ample attention.

            “Is Aunt Pepper coming?” AJ asked.  “I really miss her.”

            Steve frowned. “I invited her.  I didn’t hear back. She’s very busy, running a company isn’t any easy feat.  If she comes, great! If not… that’s okay too.”

            Sarah didn’t even have a reaction.  She acted like no one had even brought Pepper up.  It was impressive. She just seemed bore by the conversation as she inspected her perfectly polished nails.  What Bucky would give to know what was going on inside that head of hers.

            Steve looked over to Bucky.  “We all good for today?”

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah I don’t think that you guys have anything to worry about.  If anything does go down, both Barton and I are here. I think we’ve got it covered.”

Steve relaxed as he and the other kids took a seat in the same row.  More people began filing in to the auditorium. Bucky and Clint took their places, they each sat on either side of the family.  

            As people were filing in, Bucky saw Sam and Riley show up and they all scooted down two seats so that they could squeeze in.  It was nice to see that they were here to support them, even though the only ones who were really excited about this were Harrison and Steve.  The others did not really seem to share the same level of enthusiasm.

            Jamie had immediately climbed down from Sarah’s lap to go sit on Riley.  Riley seemed to adore that. He just lifted Jamie up effortlessly and kept him on his knee while he was saying something to Clint.  It was probably something very polite because Clint kept shaking his head and waving dismissively at him. Bucky was all too familiar with how polite Riley could be.

            Just as the ceremony was about to begin, AJ nudged him with his elbow.  “We have to move down one more. Aunt Pepper is here!”

            Bucky’s head snapped to the other end of the aisle.  Sure enough, there stood Pepper Potts. She looked frazzled, but it was clear that Sarah’s threats had worked.  She was there and all the kids were ecstatic. Even Sarah put on a very convincing act as she pulled Pepper in for a big hug, acting like there was never any bad blood between the two of them.

            He moved over a seat and everyone else followed suit.  The moment they sat down, the ceremony began. Bucky wasn’t paying much attention to the actual ceremony, though.  He was much more interested in all the guests that were there--especially Pepper. He really hoped that she’d come back to the house like everyone else.  He could better observe her that way. It’d be much easier than watching her through a camera. That said, he had to pay attention to the rest of the attendees as well.  While he had run a background check on most of the families in the district, it was impossible to do that kind of research on all their guests that may have been present today.  He didn’t to leave much of anything to chance.

            He was on the lookout for anything suspicious, but luckily… nothing.  Everyone was acting like it was a preschool graduation. People were clapping for their kids and taking pictures.  No one seemed to be paying them much attention. He didn’t want to be lulled into a false sense of security either, so he tried his best to stay vigilant and attentive.

            Then he heard Harrison’s name called.  He turned his attention back to the stage.  The sight before him was absolutely adorable.  Harrison’s gown looked to be almost two sizes too big, and his cap was practically covering his eyes.  That said, he wore an enormous smile as he took his “diploma” from Peggy and walked off the stage and down the aisle to sit with Steve and the rest.

            Steve--who had been filming the whole thing on his phone--put the phone down and pulled Harrison right onto his lap.  Harrison beamed as he showed Sarah his “diploma” and she enthusiastically took it from his grasp.

            The ceremony ended shortly after that.  It wasn’t a particularly long afternoon at the school, but it was perfect when you considered how short the attention span was of all the young children being honored.  

            They were filing out of their row to get ready to leave.  Bucky overheard Steve talking to Pepper.

            “You’re coming to the house right?  I’ve got plenty of food and the kids have missed you like crazy,” Steve said as he took Jamie back from Riley.  

            She nodded.  “I wouldn’t miss it.  I cleared out my entire schedule for today, and I have a surprise coming too.”

            “That’s really not necessary,” Steve said politely.  “We’re all just happy to have you here. We’ve really missed you.”

            She smiled sadly at that.  “I missed everyone too. It’s just been really hard with everything lately, and then I thought that I stayed away for too long and that I couldn’t just show up but… I realized that I was being silly.  I’m really glad that I came here today.

            Steve grinned at that.  “Yeah--us too.”

            Pepper’s shoulders relaxed.  Maybe she was being honest. Bucky just wasn’t too sure what to think about any of it.  The whole interaction between her and Sarah was bizarre as was the exchange with Parker.

            They all piled into the car with Barton and followed behind them in his car.  He was making sure that they weren’t being followed. There wasn’t anything to report as far as he could tell.  Not that it would have been a wise decision to follow them, there were five people who had served in the armed forces with the family.  Today would not have been a good day for anyone to try something.

            When they got back to the house, the kids were running wild.  They were all extremely happy that Pepper was there as well as Sam and Riley.  Sam and Riley were less thrilled to see Pepper. It was clear that Sarah wasn’t the only one who had feelings about Pepper’s absence.

            Sarah was just watching Pepper very closely.  She was being quiet and not commenting on much of anything, but it was clear that her attention was on Pepper.  Bucky wasn’t sure what was going on in her head. She’d gotten what she wanted. Pepper was there, just like she asked her to be.  Maybe there was more to that threat than Bucky realized, maybe there was subtext that Bucky hadn’t read.

           Pepper was currently sitting on the floor with Maria.  They were talking about school and summer plans. Riley was watching Pepper even more closely than Sarah was.  Bucky wasn’t sure what that relationship was like. He’d never seen the two of them interact before, but if he was judging from Riley’s expression, he was not her number one fan.

            Riley’s arms were crossed, and his eyes were narrowed as he stared at Pepper.  There was no way that the afternoon was going to end without there being some sort of confrontation between the two.  He wasn’t even blinking as he watched her. There was clearly something going on that Bucky wasn’t privy to.

            Steve however seemed to be thrilled that everyone was there to celebrate the “graduation.”  He seemed to be oblivious to the tension that was filling the room. Even Clint was exchanging confused looks with Bucky.  The situation was just so uncomfortable.

            Howie wasn’t thrilled to see Pepper either, but he was just sulking in the other room and Bucky decided to go join him in the kitchen.  “Everything okay? Something tells me Potts is kind of persona non grata around here.”

            Howie shrugged.  “I don’t know--we just could have used her here around the holidays or the rest of the year.  This has been a really hard time for us and it would have been nice to have her around. I tried reaching out a few times, and I didn’t hear anything back.  I guess it’s different when the five year old has an event.”

            Bucky frowned at that.  “I think that she might have some time to reflect on some stuff.  I don’t think that it had anything to do with the event itself.”

            “Maybe,” Howie said, not seeming too convinced.  “I just--that lab meant so much to me, and when I asked if I could stop by-- she never answered.”

            “I think you should ask her about it today,” Bucky said honestly.  “Maybe it’s not what you think.”

            Howie gulped.  “But what if it is what I think?  Or worse? That’s my _aunt_.  I’ve known her my whole life and… I’ve missed her.  I don’t want to push her further away.”

            Bucky crossed his arms.  “I don’t think that’s your responsibility.  You’re the kid here. If it pushes her further away then tell your Pops, or even Sarah.  I’m sure you all still have some stake in the company If going down there is that important to you, then I think you should fight for it.”

            Howie bit his lip nervously.  “Yeah?”

            Bucky clapped him on the shoulder firmly.  “Absolutely. With everything you’ve all gone through--it’s the least she could do.”

            “Maybe,” Howie said, still sounding unsure.  “I could always pretend that I’m there to see Peter.  I heard she made him a huge job offer.”

            “That he can’t accept until he graduates,” Bucky said, playing devil’s advocate.

            “I’m sure he’s still doing intern work there for now.  He’s only got a year or two left until he can work there full time,” Howie said, still watching the entryway incase someone decided to walk in.

            Bucky took a deep breath.  “It’s up to you, kid. I just think it’s a good idea to look into it.  The worst she can say is no, right?”

            Howie nodded.  “I guess you have a point there.”

            Sarah wandered into the kitchen.  Her arms were crossed and she was clearly annoyed with something.  “I guess no one is going to address the elephant in _that_ room.”

            “Which one?  The fact that she went AWOL or the fact that the reason is because she was in love with Dad?” Howie asked as Sarah took a seat on one of the stools at the island.

            “The former,” Sarah said as she rested her chin on her hand.  “Although the latter still bugs me too.”

            “How come we _never_ talk about that?” Howie asked and it was one of the few times that Bucky saw the two in agreement on something.

            Sarah shrugged.  “Dad said it wasn’t true and I don’t think Papa wanted to know if it was true or not.  Not that it matters now anyway.”

            This was the second time that someone had mentioned that Potts had unrequited feelings towards Stark.  Was is possible that she felt so slighted by his rejection that she helped facilitate his death? Bucky had been looking into Pepper and found no evidence that she had anything to do with Stark’s death… but he didn’t find anything that proved her innocence either.  It still wasn’t as if he could report that back to Pierce. That would almost guaranteed that he would get taken off the case. The fact was there were no signs pointing him to JARVIS. He’d have to find some other lead soon or he’d have to find something on Potts to keep this going.  

            Bucky didn’t have much time to reflect on that because a loud commotion coming from the other room.  He ran over there. Clint was standing in there, clearly unsure where to go. Riley was shouting something indiscernible as Sam was trying to coax him into another room.  Pepper was yelling back, Bucky wasn’t paying any attention to the adults causing a scene. He was focused on Harrison, who had been so excited this morning. He was now nervously glancing between Pepper and Riley.

            Harrison wasn’t the only one.  The twins were also looking on anxiously.  They shouldn’t have been watching this. Bucky was about to intervene when he heard a bellowing voice from the top of the steps.

            “Hey!” The house became so silent you could hear a pin drop.  Steve was standing there. He was pissed. His face worn a stern expression--it wasn’t something that Bucky had ever seen before.  It was the first time that Bucky saw him as the militaristic disciplinarian that Sarah described from her childhood, but Bucky wouldn’t dare challenge Steve like this.  “If anyone has any problems with the guests in _my_ house for _my_ son’s celebration, then you can go home.  Today we are celebrating. If anyone has anything against that it won’t be said under this roof.”

            “Sorry, Steve,” Riley said after a few moments of tense silence.  “I wasn’t thinking. Today is about Harrison.”

            Pepper nodded.  “I’m sorry too. I had a poor reaction to… the confrontation--”

            “It wasn’t a --” Riley started before Sam tapped his shoulder, signaling him to stop.  He took a breath. “I’m sorry you interpreted my… conversation with you to be… confrontational, Pepper.  It wasn’t my intention.”

            She nodded again.  “I’m sorry that I was… sensitive.  I may have overreacted a bit.”

            Steve didn’t look too convinced.  His jaw was still clenched tightly and he was watching the two of them closely before he relaxed a bit and walked down the steps.  Sam gave him an apologetic smile, and Steve seemed to calm down even more after that.

            Pepper’s phone buzzed and she looked down at it for a minute.  She smiled. “I’ve got a surprise for you all, and it looks like it’s here.”

            Harrison’s face lit up at that.  “A surprise?”  
            Pepper grinned as she walked over to the door and opened it.  Bucky’s mouth fell open. He knew the man standing on the other side of the door by reputation and from reading the files on the family.  Colonel James Rhodes was standing on the front porch.

            The kids just stared for a moment.  From what Bucky understood, they hadn’t seen Rhodes since Stark’s funeral.  

            “Uncle Rhodey!” Sarah practically sobbed out as she raced over to him and practically threw herself onto him for a bone crushing hug.  She was actually crying, and Bucky looked back to see Steve who looked like she had just kicked his puppy. Steve had been trying to make things right with Sarah to no avail, and yet she was so ready to be close to Rhodey.

            Bucky didn’t seem to be the only one to notice this.  Pepper was eyeing Steve too with a guilty expression. If she was playing along with some weird plan then she was a better actress than Bucky would have guessed.  She genuinely seemed to be questioning whether bringing Rhodes in was a good idea or not.

            Steve must have noticed the few eyes on him, because he cleared his throat and stood up a little straighter.  “Let him breathe, Sarah. I’m sure everyone else would like to say hello too.”

            Sarah peeled herself away from her uncle.  It was clear that there was a lot of love there.  Rhodey also seemed to be emotional seeing the kids.  He walked into the house and was practically bombarded by the rest of them.  He knelt down and hugged the twins and Harrison in one big embrace. It was a very sweet sight.  

            Once the little ones removed themselves from their uncle, it was Maria’s turn.  She hugged him so tightly. It was clear that she didn’t want to let go. It must have been hard, not getting to see him since Tony had passed.  Clearly, his presence was missed.

            Howie gave his uncle a big hug too, but it was clear that he was a little less enthused than the others.  Maybe Howie saw him as yet another figure that didn’t take the reins from him when he was the only one acting like an adult in the home.

            Sam walked over to Rhodes and shook his hand once the kids were done saying their hellos.  “How are you doing, Rhodes?”

            “I’m doing well.  I missed everyone.  This is my first leave since… well you know.  How about you?”

            “Can’t complain,” Sam said diplomatically.

            “How’s Auntie Carol?” Sarah asked with a smile.  “She couldn’t make it?”

            Rhodes shook his head.  “She’s still saving the world, unfortunately.  She sends her love, but her next leave won’t be for a while.”

            “Will you tell her we say hello?” Maria asked sadly.

            “Oh!” AJ exclaimed.  “We should make her cards!”

            “I bet she’d love that,” he said with a big smile.

            AJ grinned back and turned to the others.  They must have been on the same age because the twins and Harrison all scurried off into the dining room.  More likely than not, they were going to do a bunch of arts and crafts for Carol.

            Rhodes walked over to Pepper and pecked her cheek sweetly.  “Pepper, always good to see you.”

            Riley shook Rhodes’s hand but was uncharacteristically reserved.  “Good to see you,” was the only thing that he said. Rhodes just nodded back politely but didn’t say anything.

            That was something he’d ask Steve about later.  Steve smiled widely as he hugged Rhodey and stayed there for a moment.  Rhodes was Stark’s oldest friend. He might be the only person who could really understand what Steve was going through and vice-versa.  Platonic love could be just as strong as romantic love.

            “How are you doing?” Rhodey asked after they finally broke apart.  “I know it can’t be easy.”

            Steve shrugged and looked down at his shoes.  “Gotta go day by day, right?”

            “Not what I asked,” Rhodey said.  His tone was light, but it was evident that he was not about to let Steve get off that easily.

            “Better than before,” Steve said after a pause.  “Definitely better than before. I just… we’re still getting used to life without him.  Some days, I think about giving him a call and then it hits me again like a ton of bricks.  What about you?”

            Rhodes sighed. “Honestly, I’ve been so involved in work… it makes it easier.  I didn’t have to reinvent my entire routine. It’s easier to pretend that he’s just busy with work and that why he doesn’t call anymore.  I’m not proud of it, but it makes it easier.”

            Steve nodded.  “I can imagine.”

            The two of them made their way to the kitchen to continue their conversation.  Bucky didn’t doubt that they each probably had a lot to say. He hoped the conversation was filled with happy memories rather than grief and pain.

            Riley was eyeing Pepper.  It was clear that he wanted to continue their confrontation from before, but he held his tongue.  Sam was watching Riley. He seemed to be relieved that Riley was keeping quiet at the moment. Bucky had to wonder what the fight had been about.  He’d never seen that side of Riley or Pepper. Riley was usually so hospitable and friendly; Pepper was usually very professional--she hadn’t even lost her cool when Sarah blackmailed her.  What had Riley said that set her off?

            Pepper seemed to just be happy that no one was on her case at the moment.  She was currently sitting next to Maria on the couch. They were looking through magazines and talking about the summer.  Maria seemed to be overjoyed that Pepper was around. He imagined it must have been hard for her to be the oldest girl around when Sarah was at school.  He wondered if she and Pepper used to have days like this all the time. What had made Potts keep her distance in the first place? To her credit, she did seem to be happy to there.  They way she looked at Maria… it was clear that she had missed the girl. There was love there. So what kept her away?

            Bucky’s blood ran cold.  Maybe he’d been looking at the case the wrong way this whole time.  Maybe the person who sold Stark out didn’t do it because they had any issues with Stark.  Maybe they did it to protect the family instead.


	15. Chapter 14

            _Mission Report:  First Week of July.  The kids are around a lot more now that school is no longer in session. Rogers is refusing to acknowledge his birthday. Otherwise things are relatively mundane._

            Steve had refused to put the kids in camp.  He wanted them home. This made things… interesting.  The kids played in the pool a lot and that was probably the best case scenario, but it got old pretty quickly.  The trouble came when they started getting bored of everything. Then they just got wild. It made Bucky want to send a million thank you notes to their teachers from the previous school year.  They had to deal with this all year long.

            Even Steve seemed to be at the end of his rope.  The energy that these kids had was something else.  Harrison only was as if someone gave a cartoon rabbit a shot of espresso, that coupled with Maria and the twins was a recipe for disaster.  They’d only been home a week and the amount of things that had broken in the house was astronomical. It was a talent. A talent Bucky could do without.

            Rhodes had been staying with them for the week.  He was great with the kids, and Steve seemed beyond thrilled to have him around.  The mornings mostly contained the two of them exchanging old stories about Stark. It was the most laughter that Bucky had heard in the home since he’d been there.  

            Rhodes--or Rhodey as the family had affectionately called him--seemed to be the one receiving the brunt of the kid overload.  They couldn’t get enough of him. Even Sarah wasn’t immune. All she wanted to do was sit around and talk to her uncle. She wasn’t like that with Sam, Riley, or Pepper.  This seemed to be exclusive to Rhodes. Sure, she was always polite to the others, but she lit up around Rhodes. She would hang on his every word and listed in awe to each and every miniscule thing that he had to say.

            Steve didn’t even seem to be upset about the bonding anymore.  Steve seemed to just leave the Sarah situation alone. Bucky didn’t blame him--he wasn’t sure what he’d do if he were in Steve’s position. His relationship with Sarah seemed to be a lose-lose situation.  He couldn’t seem to buy a win with Sarah. She wasn’t the same person to Steve that she was around Rhodes or Barton. With Steve, she was cold and distant, it was as if almost all their interactions were business transactions.  Sarah was always seemingly pleasant and polite, but never personal. Steve hadn’t even tried to touch that with a ten foot pole following her confession a few weeks prior.

            The issue that was becoming more and more apparent was that Rhodes could not stay there indefinitely.  His tour might have been done, and he had yet to decide whether he’d go back, but one thing was becoming clear… he couldn’t stay there indefinitely.  Rhodes had a life… and it wasn’t there.

            “You know you’re welcome to stay for as long as you need,” Steve had said while he was clearing off the table.  Rhodes was loading the dishwasher as he and Steve were discussing the his stay.

            “I appreciate that, Steve,” Rhodes said as he closed the cabinet.  “Really, I do. You know I wished that I could have gotten here sooner, but there is some stuff I have to take care of back home.”

            Steve gave a sad smile.  He’d likely seen this coming.  “Of course you do. We just missed having you around is all.”

            “I missed being here,” Rhodey said wistfully.  “It’s just… it’s strange… him not being here.”

            Steve nodded.  “Yeah. For the longest time, I used to just wait for him to turn around the corner and start rambling about his next project.”

            “Yeah or nearly destroying the house trying to _create_ his newest project.”  Rhodes laughed. “Have you spoken to Nat?”

            Steve tensed as he glanced over to Bucky.  Clearly he wasn’t expecting to talk about the Widow.  “Um… every so often. I think she and Sarah have been pretty close lately.”

            Rhodey seemed to catch whatever subtext Steve was conveying because he nodded hastily and changed the subject.  “Hey, how have their birthdays been? I know I sent gifts, but no parties this year?”

            Steve shook his head.  “I just can’t throw a big party.  I’ve gotten them all nice gifts and taken them out to dinner but… I can’t have a bunch of kids running around and… Tony was the one who did the parties.  He was a big kid himself, he knew exactly what to do. I was the one who mostly just walked around making sure that there wasn’t too big of a mess anywhere.”

            Rhodey shrugged.  “Maybe next year. It’s probably a little too soon anyway.  The younger ones probably just want Tony back as their present.”

            Steve massaged his temples.  “You should have seen Christmas.  It was a disaster.”

            “The first ones are always the hardest,” Rhodey said glumly.  “Hopefully next year Carol and I will be able to join you guys at least.”

            Steve grinned at that.  “I hope so. It was just us this year.”

            “Sam and Riley?”

            “They went to Sam’s mom,” Steve said.

            “Pepper?”

            “M.I.A.,” Steve said a hint of bitterness in his voice.  “She’s been pretty M.I.A. for a lot of this year.”

            Rhodey gave him a strange look. “Really?  She hadn’t mentioned it.”

            “Yeah, she helped out a lot in the beginning, but she stopped coming around after Halloween.  I’d invite her to holidays and dinner and… radio silence. I think this all got to be a little too much for her.  I was surprised that she came to Harrison’s graduation.”

            Rhodey frowned.  “That’s odd. She did get me out here pretty last minute.  I thought it was to throw you off the scent for the surprise.”

            Steve shrugged.  “Well, there was no scent… we really hadn’t seen her in months.”

            It clicked.  This wasn’t just some kind gesture that Potts was extending.  This was to distract Sarah. Sarah had completely forgotten all about her issues with Potts when she had brought Rhodes back to them.  This was all to throw Sarah off her scent.

            Bucky slowly departed the room and made his way up the steps.  He knocked on Barton’s door. He could hear hushed whispers coming from the other end.  It wasn’t entirely surprising. Barton had an open door policy for Sarah. She seemed to be going to him more and more often.

            Barton cracked the door open and Bucky poked his head in.  There was no one else there. “What was that?”

            “What?”

            “I heard you talking to someone,” Bucky said, trying not to sound accusatory.  Barton hadn’t been the most forthcoming through this mission, and he was trying not to let his distaste for that seep through.

            Clint took a deep breath.  “Well… I had a visit from our itsie bitsie spider.”

            Bucky practically pushed his way into the bedroom.  The Widow had been here. “Did she just leave?”

            Clint nodded.  “Yeah. It was… bizarre.  She’s concerned about Sarah.”

            “Why not reach out to Steve? Aren’t they friends?” Bucky crossed his arms.

            “I guess she’s aware that things are tense there.” Clint rubbed his forehead.  “She was mostly just keeping me posted on her surveillance plans for when Sarah goes back to school in a little over a month.”

            Bucky groaned.  “Is this the first time she’s made contact since the attack at the dorm?”

            “Yeah, Sarge.  This is the first time since then.”

            Bucky shook his head but had to change the subject.  He didn’t have time to worry about the Widow. “I wanted to run something by you.”

            “Shoot?”

            “Potts.  Sarah threatened her, she shows up to the graduation and gives them Rhodes.  Since then, we haven’t seen or heard from her again. Maybe Rhodes was just a distraction.  Maybe she just wanted Sarah to back off.”

            Barton didn’t look too convinced.  “Maybe? I thought that we had no reason to suspect Potts anymore.  We didn’t find anything linking her to JARVIS. At worst, she just doesn’t seem to want Sarah threatening her or her company anymore.  I think we can understand that much.”

            “This doesn’t smell funny to you?” Bucky asked frustratedly.  “I mean, we’ve got nothing.”

            “This whole thing smells funny,” Barton said.  “It doesn’t mean that Pepper Potts has any idea where JARVIS is.  Besides, from what we can tell, she was fiercely loyal to Stark. I don’t think she sold him out.”

            Bucky began pacing around the room.  “Did the Widow have any insight into this?  If she wants to keep them safe, then maybe she could give us a lead on where the hell this tech is hiding.”

            Barton shook his head.  “If she knows anything, then she didn’t feel inclined to share.”

            “Did you ask?”

            “Sarge, I think I was lucky to leave that conversation still breathing.  I wasn’t exactly grilling her for information,” Clint said honestly.

            Bucky sighed.  He couldn’t exactly argue with that mentality.  The Widow was one of the most infamous assassins in the world.  Bucky wouldn’t exactly feel comfortable interrogating her either.

            “So we’re back to square one?” Bucky asked rhetorically.

            Barton shrugged.  “I don’t know about square one.  Maybe there is something going on at Stark Industries… but that doesn’t mean that it’s Potts.”

            “If not her, then who?”

            “What about that Parker kid?” Clint asked.  “He seemed pretty valuable to Potts.”

            Bucky bit his lip.  He wasn’t convinced that this kid was involved.  “Maybe? I don’t think he was too involved.”

            “Based on what Howie’s said, right?” Clint asked.

            “You think Howie’s an unreliable source?  Why would he vouch for him if he didn’t have reason to trust him?” Bucky crossed his arms.  “Besides, the kid’s been gone for a while. He just came back and that meeting with Potts seemed to be her needing him more than the other way around.  I just don’t see him as a mastermind here.”          

            Clint groaned.  “I don’t think The Widow is looking for our help here.”

            “No,” Bucky agreed.  “I think she’s trying to throw us off the scent.”

            “If she knew where it was wouldn’t she just turn it in?” Clint asked, exasperation in his voice.  He crossed his arms. “I just don’t see what she’d gain from toying with us. She could have sold it or done something with it by now.”

            Bucky sighed.  “She came here.  Why not just enter through the front door?  We know that she’s friends with the family, and that she’s been working to protect Sarah.  Why be secretive?”

            Clint gave him a look.  “If this was your sister’s family, would you want face-time with the people failing to find the information that could keep your family safe?”

            Bucky frowned.  “I guess. Maybe I’m looking at this all the wrong way.”

            Clint exhaled.  “Don’t take this the wrong way, but maybe Pierce is wrong.  Maybe Stark wasn’t as close to a working prototype as we thought.  Maybe the tech really did die with Stark.”

            “Who was in charge of Stark’s operation?  I mean once he was working for us,” Bucky asked.  “Wouldn’t they have an idea if there was more information missing?”

            “Probably,” Clint admitted.  “I can get a name for you. If you really want to know who was working on this with him.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah. That’d be a good place to jump from, because I’ve got jack shit right now, and we’ve been at this for almost a year.”

            “I’ll see what I can dig up,” Clint said, not making eye contact.  Bucky understood why. They were entirely too attached. Neither of them wanted to leave this family behind and it was clear that they were not being adequately motivated to find the tech.  Ordinarily, Bucky would have recused himself from the assignment, but this was different. Bucky really didn’t think that Steve or the kids would be taken seriously by other agents. This would seem like a cakewalk to anyone else.  Bucky didn’t trust that his colleagues would be as diligent as he was.

            _Status Report_ : _Third Week in July. Rhodes has to return home._

            Rhodes eventually did have to go back home.  It wasn’t something that the kids were really ready for.  Sarah seemed to be taking it pretty hard. She was definitely putting on less of a front as they all said tearful goodbyes.  The younger ones cried, and even Jamie seemed sad to see Rhodey go. The little one definitely didn’t understand.

            Howie had been going to and from the lab more and more often.  He must have had more luck reaching out to Pepper than he had in the past.  Overall, it had been greatly improving Howie’s morale. He was spending less and less time fretting over his siblings and more time being a kid and focusing on himself like a normal seventeen year old.

            Steve had spent the past few weeks trying and failing to potty-train the near two-year-old.  Jamie was proving to be a difficult case. Bucky could see Steve running the little boy all over the house trying to get him to use the “big boy potty.”  Bucky was really glad that he didn’t have to partake in that piece of child rearing.

            Bucky had been spending most of the time during the summer playing.  Harrison and the twins were constantly looking to play games all throughout the house, and it gave Bucky ample opportunity to reexamine the house and see if he missed anything during his initial sweeps of the home.

            “Sarge,” AJ hissed as they were in Tony’s office.  It was the very same room where Christmas had fallen apart.  “I don’t think Talia will look for us in here.”

            Bucky wasn’t as convinced.  They’d been hiding in a lot of the rooms down the abandoned hall.  Hardly anyone ever came down here. It was seemingly just used for storage and the two offices.  Steve had his space, and Tony’s office was kept like a shrine. Bucky had spent the better part of July in these rooms trying to see if there was anything that he’d missed.

            It really only took Talia about ten minutes of searching to find them under the desk in Tony’s office.  She gave them a disapproving look. “Can you try something a little tricker next time?”

            AJ pouted as he stood up.  “I really didn’t think that you’d look here.”

            Talia crossed her arms.  “Well, I did. It’s Sarge’s turn.”

            “I’m it?” Bucky asked.

            Talia nodded.  “You have to close your eyes and count to ten.”

            Bucky laughed to himself at that.  “It’s not my first time playing. I think I know how to be it.”

            Talia raised an eyebrow but didn’t argue.  Bucky stood up and turned his back to them.  He covered his eyes and began to count slowly and loudly.  Once they were out of earshot, Bucky began to examine the room closely.  He must have missed something. This was Tony’s space. This was ground zero.  JARVIS was probably dreamt up in this very room. There must have been some sign telling him where to go.

            He quickly began looking through the room.  There was nothing. It was almost as if the place was swept clean.  There wasn’t even an old blueprint with the name scribbled on it. There was not a single thing pointing to the technology.  He wasn’t entirely surprised, if it were easy then he’d have found it months ago.

            Bucky wandered out of Stark’s office and glanced down the hall.  It wouldn’t be too odd for him to look for the kids down the hall of secrets.  There was so much that he had left unturned. Maybe he was missing some key piece of information that was just behind one of the many doors.

            Bucky crept his way down the hallway and walked into the next closest room.  It was… vacant. It was bizarre staring at this spare room. It looked like it had been completely cleaned out and unfinished.  Bucky glanced around the room—there were clear marks on the floor. There used to be furniture in this room. Now there was nothing.  If it weren’t for the scrape marks on the floor, Bucky would have believed that this room was just never furnished. He would have assumed that it was just an extra room that Stark and Rogers hadn’t had a purpose for.  This room once held something… he just wasn’t sure what.

            Bucky left the room and headed further down the hall.  He was peering down the corridor and he made his way to the next door.  Again… nothing. There definitely used to be something there. Bucky had went through all the rooms when he first showed up.  What had happened to everything?

            Bucky couldn’t stop there, he had to go and inspect every last room.  These rooms that were once covered with boxes and storage bins. Now they were vacant and empty.  Bucky made his way back over to the first set of doors. He went into Steve’s office this time. It was neat and meticulous as always.  Steve’s office was always just so. It was evident that he tidied it up often. There wasn’t even a thin layer of dust to be seen on any of the furnishings.

            Bucky didn’t get a chance to look around much.  Steve entered his office. He stopped and looked surprised to see Bucky there.  “What’s going on?”

            “Hide and seek,” Bucky said dumbly.  “AJ was running around over here, so I figured I’d take a look.”

            Steve didn’t question it.  He just nodded. “I should have warned you.  Hide and seek has a tendency to become an all day affair.  There are quite a few nooks and crannies they can get into.  The key is to have a spy. Harrison usually rats them out if you need a hand.”  Steve gave a small laugh and licked his lips and Bucky could swear that it happened in slow motion.

            “I’ll keep that in mind,” Bucky said as he motioned to the door.  “I guess I’d better get hunting.”

            Steve’s face fell a bit at that as he moved out of the way.  “Yeah--yeah. Um… of course. I wanted to run some ideas by you later.  Howie’s got his road test coming up and that means… well he’s got a lot more freedom coming his way.  Naturally, I’m kind of freaking out about it.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Are you thinking of getting him his own car?”

            Steve shrugged.  “I don’t really want to.  I just… I know that he deserves some more freedom and he’s a good kid.  Tony’s got a garage full of cars that we’re not using.”

            “Where?” Bucky asked interestedly.  He hadn’t seen anything of the sort.

            “They’re parked at the garage near the lab.  He really didn’t use them much,” Steve said uninterestedly. “Is there… will there be a need for him to… have his own… Clint?”

            Bucky paused.  “I don’t think we need to jump to that conclusion just yet.  We’re hoping to track down this tech soon and get out of your hair--”

            “You’re not,” Steve said abruptly.  “In our hair… I mean.”

            “Thanks,” Bucky said, rubbing the back of his neck uncomfortably.  “But, I’m sure you’d like to get your house back to yourselves.”

            Steve practically pouted.  “We really do like having you here.  I know it’s silly, but I’m not sure how well we’re all gonna take it when you inevitably have to leave us.  The kids are getting attached… and they’re not the only ones. I know we can be difficult, but it’s definitely nice having another adult in the house.  I don’t know… I felt like we were becoming friends. Is that stupid?”

            Bucky felt his heart soar.  He loved being there with them too, and he was definitely too attached to Steve and the children.   _Way_ too attached.  As much as he tried to fight it, he found himself feeling fiercely connected to the kids and he was definitely falling for the widower that he was charged to protect.  

            “I don’t think it’s stupid.  I’m not looking forward to leaving either. . . but I want you all to be happy and to have good lives.  The fact is having a personal security detail isn’t part of that. Not for the reasons you have one,” Bucky said sadly.

            Steve frowned.  “I hope that doesn’t mean that you have to go radio silent on us.”

            Bucky felt his heart drop at that.  He wasn’t sure what his next assignment would be, but he was certain that he probably wouldn’t be able to keep in contact.  The fact is that they weren’t his family, his job required that he had full attention on the assignment at hand. Besides, if any legal action was needed based on this case it could be compromised if they could prove he became too attached.

            “It’s not ideal,” Bucky said honestly.  “I don’t really know how things will work when they move me to my next assignment.  I could be overseas or put on another high profile case. There’s a reason that I’m not too close to my family… it’s an occupational hazard.”

            “Oh,” Steve said deflated.  “I guess it’s silly that I thought we’d be able to have you over for dinner or something every so often.”

            Bucky shrugged.  “I don’t know, Steve… it’s not exactly like I live around here.”

            Steve’s face dropped even lower.  “I didn’t even think… Bucky, I don’t even know where home is for you.”

            “There’s not… I live wherever I’m stationed.  I don’t have a place that’s mine,” Bucky said.

            “Well that’s not true.  I know that this whole situation is complicated but if you ever need a place to relax and lay low… you’re part of the family.  This can be home,” Steve said sweetly.

            It was so tempting.  The house, the kids… Steve.  He wanted this more than he could ever admit, but Steve wasn’t saying what Bucky wanted to hear.  Steve wasn’t saying that he wanted Bucky to be his person, he was saying that he was welcome there, the same way Rhodey or Sam were welcome.  Bucky was in too deep. He couldn’t happily watch on as Steve inevitably found a love that wasn’t him and would actually be a parental figure to those kids.  That wasn’t a life he wanted. That was hell.

            “Thank you,” Bucky said politely.  “I just don’t think that would be entirely appropriate.  I appreciate the gesture though.”

            Steve looked down at his shoes.  “Well, for what it’s worth. I mean it.  You’re family.”

            “That’s really sweet of you to say,” Bucky said as he cleared his throat.  It was nice and he wanted them to be his family… but just not in the way that Steve intended it.

            Bucky motioned to the door.  “I’ve gotta keep searching, otherwise they’ll never stop telling me how I’m the worst “it” ever.”

            Steve stepped away from the door and gave him a sad smile.  “Of course. “It” privileges are very important.”

            Bucky shuffled past him and made his way out of the study.  Bucky didn’t have time to think about Steve and how he was in far too deep.  He had to focus on finding the tech. That was the priority he couldn’t think about the personal repercussions he’d have to face once he actually did find it.

 

 


	16. Chapter 15

            _Status Report: Mid-August._

_Sarah went back to college about a week ago.  The family is adjusting to her absence. Overall things have been mundane._

Things really had been nothing but normal at the home.  Bucky still wasn’t sure what had happened to the other rooms, but he wasn’t sure about asking Steve.  He’d be revealing that he’d been poking around. He felt the less that Steve knew about what he was investigating, the better.  Steve always skewed Bucky’s view of things.

            Bucky had instead brought his attention back to the kids themselves.  There had been quite a few things that he had chosen to overlook during his tenure there.  It was time to start acting on these things.

            The first ones that he decided to talk to were the twins.  They already gave him details about almost everything that they did.  He was curious about something that Harrison had mentioned back during the holidays.  He just didn’t trust Harrison to keep a secret. The twins, on the other hand, were definitely much more excited to play along with spy games.  Bucky was sure that they were a more trustworthy choice than the five-year-old.

            They were coloring in the kitchen.  AJ was coloring very delicately to make sure that he stayed perfectly inside the lines.  Talia, however, was coloring so roughly that the tip of the crayons that she was using were flattened.  She was much less concerned with staying in the lines as she was trying to finish it. Bucky was just shading in one of the many pictures that the kids had drawn him.  

            “Your picture is coming out nice, Bucky,” AJ said with a wide smile.  It had become clear that AJ was the oddball of the home but could rival Maria for being the sweetest kid too.  With the exception of the occasional fighting with his siblings, AJ hardly ever had a bad word to say about anybody.

            “Thanks, kiddo,” Bucky said appreciatively.  “You two are doing a really nice job too. I was wondering,” he dropped his voice theatrically low.  He needed to sell this. “Where your dad used to keep his…. Gadgets.”

            Talia gave him an odd look.  “Daddy didn’t keep his gadgets at home.”

            “No--no.” AJ shook his head adamantly.  “There was one… remember?”

            Talia’s face brightened up.  “Oh! Right! Papa had that one.”

            “Your Pops had one?” Bucky asked.

            AJ shook his head.  “No, silly. Papa didn’t want it in the house.  He didn’t like Daddy’s gizmos. When Papa found one in Daddy’s office there was a big fight about it.”

            “Yeah, Papa didn’t want it here,” Talia agreed.  “He was really upset that it was here.”

            “It was in your Dad’s office?” Bucky asked.

            Talia nodded.  “Well, then Papa took it.  He had it in his study until Daddy got home that night.”

            “Did the gadget have a name?” Bucky asked, trying not to press them too hard.

            AJ laughed.  “Of course. All of Daddy’s gadgets have name.”

            Bucky waited for them to continue.  They didn’t. “What was this one’s name?”

            Talia made a face before laughing along with her twin brother.  “It’s the one that everybody’s looking for. JARVIS.”

            Bucky paused.  “Do you know where JARVIS is now?”

            AJ shook his head.  “I think Daddy took it somewhere else.  Papa really didn’t want it here.”

            “If it _was_ here… I’d look in Papa’s office,” Talia said as she went back to coloring.  “That was the last place it was.”

            AJ nodded.  “I bet Bucky already checked there, though.”

            “Well _duh_ ,” Talia said, sticking her tongue out at him.  “I’m just saying… if it was anywhere here, that’d be my best guess.”

            “Yeah,” Bucky said, trying to play it off.  “I don’t think it’s hiding around here. I was just wondering where everything used to be kept.  Just in case my boss asks me.”

            That seemed to satisfy them because they went right back to coloring in their pictures.  Bucky really hadn’t paid much attention to Steve’s study. He had originally written him off as an unaware airhead, and then had just been too trusting to revisit the idea that Steve might be actively involved in hiding the tech.

            _Status Report: Last Week of August._

_Steve is preparing the kids to get back to school.  Waiting for ample opportunity to search the study thoroughly._

            Bucky was biding his time for a chance to get into the study.  After Steve had found him in there earlier in the summer, Bucky didn’t want Steve to get suspicious.  He had resorted to keeping his distance. He was spending his time focusing on Clint’s updates instead.

            Clint had mentioned that he’d had at least two encounters with the Widow since Sarah returned to school.  She seemed to be worried that Hydra might have been taking an increased interest in Sarah. Bucky wasn’t sure how seriously to take anything that the Widow was saying, but Barton seemed to be treating it as gospel.  All that mattered was that Sarah was safe. If Barton felt comfortable taking the Widow’s word for it then Bucky would let Barton take whatever measures necessary. It couldn’t hurt to be on the side of caution.

            Bucky had been checking in with Barton more frequently as a result of this.  He didn’t want to leave anything to chance, and he didn’t want to be in the dark if something did happen.  

            “Anything happening on your end?” Bucky asked over the phone to Clint.  

            “Negative.  I’ve arranged to touch base with the Widow in a week’s time.  Sarah’s setting it up. I want to determine how legitimate this threat is.  I don’t need to be wasting our time if she’s just trying to throw us off.” Barton sounded strange, like he was preoccupied.

            “What is your gut telling you?” Bucky asked.

            “Something’s going on here, Sarge.  I just don’t know what,” Clint said after a long pause.  

            Bucky sighed.  “Look, meet with the Widow and check back in.  Sooner or later, something’s gotta give. It’s almost been a year and we’re not any better off than when we started.”

            “Copy that,” Clint said and the line went dead.

            Bucky was hesitant about Sarah returning to school this fall.  It was more than just the obvious fact that he didn’t trust her.  He was genuinely concerned about her well being. So much had happened for her when she was home for the summer.  He wasn’t sure if she had acquired new enemies before returning. The Widow seemed to be concerned and if she was reaching out to Clint on more than one occasion then it must have been something she thought was a legitimate threat.

            Buck tossed the phone down on the bed.  He glanced around the room, this place had begun to feel so much like home.  As much as he longed to stay there, he knew his time in the home was limited.  He’d either find the tech or be reassigned. Pierce hadn’t exactly said this, but it was becoming clear that he was feeling less and less patient.  There days were numbered, and Bucky was determined to find the tech and resolve all this before he could be removed.

            He took a deep breath and walked out of his room and quite literally right into Steve.  “Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.”

            “No, it’s my fault,” Steve said.  “I just finished putting Harrison to bed.  I was gonna watch a movie before bed. Want to join me?”

            Bucky wanted to investigate the study, but he couldn’t exactly tell Steve that.  He paused for a moment before he nodded his head. “Yeah, sounds good. All the kids in bed?”

            Steve gave a shrug.  “I’m sure Howie’s still up, Maria might be too.  They’re still on break. It’s not big deal if they want to stay up a little later on their last few nights of freedom.”

            “I’ll do my perimeter check for the night and then meet you up there?” Bucky asked as he motioned to the steps.

            “Sounds good,” Steve beamed at him, and it really went to Bucky’s ego.  Steve certainly had Bucky wrapped around his finger, whether he realized it or not.

            Bucky raced down the steps and began double checking all the points of entry.  He took the opportunity to creep into Steve’s office quickly. He knew Steve was upstairs in his bedroom and he wasn’t expecting Bucky for a few minutes.  He could look around real quick to see if anything stood out.

            It wasn’t too hard to look for anything.  The office was ridiculously organized, and nothing was out of place.  If Steve had been hiding in there, it probably would have been labeled that was how meticulously arranged the room was.  

            Bucky was about to call it quits and head out of the room when something caught his attention.  The uniform hanging on Steve’s wall. Steve _hated_ being reminded of his time in the military.  Any time that anyone even tried to call him “Captain” he would tense up. It was clear he was always on edge whenever anyone brought up his service.  Bucky always chalked it up to PTSD or Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, but… here was this shrine to his time there. Why would Steve have medals and his uniform hanging up in the one place that he had to himself?  If it was anyone else it would have made sense. Not Steve.

            Bucky went over to the large shadow box and slowly lowered it off the wall.  It was just a wall. Bucky was sure that the Strike teams would have taken down anything on the walls during their initial sweeps.  However, one of the tiles looked to have just a tad more room between the others than the rest of the wall. Bucky slowly went to move it.  It didn’t budge. He tried again. Nothing. It must have just been a design flaw.

            Bucky put the uniform back on the wall.  He had to make his way up to Steve soon or he’d get suspicious.  Besides, this had proven to be fruitless. JARVIS just was not in the home.  Bucky was going to have to get creative when it came to looking for the tech.

            He left the office and made his way up the steps.  Bucky made his way to the master bedroom. He entered the room and was surprised to see that Steve wasn’t there.  He glanced over to the master bathroom. The light was on and he could hear water running. Steve was probably just getting ready.

            Bucky stood next to the bed awkwardly.  He’d never been in here without Steve. It was strange.  He waited for a few moments before Steve came out of the bathroom.  Steve saw him and smiled at him.

            “Hey,” Steve gave him a dopey smile.  “I take it the perimeter is secure?”

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah, I don’t think we’ll have any issues.”

            “Good,” Steve said and he took a deep breath.   He walked over to where Bucky was standing. “I have to tell you, the movie thing was kind of just an excuse to get you alone.”

            Bucky raised an eyebrow.  “Is everything okay?”

            Steve gave a nervous laugh.  “Yeah. I just--I thought we should talk.  I… we…” Steve stopped talking moved closer to him.  He was so close to Bucky and their lips were just about to touch when Bucky put out his hand against Steve’s torso, preventing him from moving closer.

            “Steve, what are you doing?” Bucky asked quietly.

            Steve’s breath faltered.  “I--I thought… I see the way you look at me.  The way you are with me and my kids and I… I’d be lying if I said that I hadn’t started to feel something too.”

            “Steve,” Bucky said, wanting to kick himself.  “We can’t do this. It’s not appropriate. I… It’s my job to protect--”

            “We haven’t been in any danger.  The last incident was when? November of _last_ year.  You being here is practically a formality.”  Bucky could feel Steve’s warm breath against his lips.

            “I,” Bucky paused.  He wanted nothing more than to kiss Steve right then and there, but it would be compromising everything.  “Because of… my feelings… I can’t. There is no one else that I trust the safety of you and your family with.”

            Steve’s face fell.  “Bucky, I--”

            Bucky moved away from the bed and went to leave the room.  He was stopped by Steve’s hand grabbing his. “Please don’t go.”  His voice sounded broken. He had heard Steve’s voice do that before… he never thought he’d be the cause.

            Bucky turned back and rested his forehead against Steve’s.  “I can’t--”

            He was cut off by Steve gently pressing his lips to his.  That was it. All protests left his mind as he found himself kissing Steve back.  Steve’s arms came up to rest on his shoulders as Bucky found his hands making their way to Steve’s waist.  He couldn’t think about anything other than Steve. Steve was kissing him-- _Steve_.

            Steve’s hands made their way to the hem of his shirt.  He began pulling at it, and Bucky raised his arms to help him get it off.  Steve didn’t even take a beat before he began tugging at the button of Bucky’s pants.  He was struggling to get them undone, and Bucky let out a laugh. They broke apart for a moment as he kicked his slacks off.

            Bucky suddenly became very aware of the fact that Steve had _way_ too many clothes on.  He kissed him deeply before he practically tore Steve’s skin tight shirt off of him.  Steve didn’t need any prompting. He made short work of his own jeans.

            Bucky had to take a moment to admire the sight before him.  Steve really was a sight to see. Sure, he thought that he belonged in a museum normally, but looking at the other man in only his boxer briefs… Steve was a mosaic crafted by the gods themselves.

            Steve must have noticed him staring because his skin became flush all over.  Bucky felt himself become consumed with desire as he began kissing Steve passionately again.  The energy between the two of them was electric. It was as if nothing else in the world existed aside from the two of them.

            Steve led Bucky over to the bed.  He was laying down on the bed as Bucky was hovering above him.  Bucky began leaving a trail of sweet, chaste kisses from Steve’s lips down his torso.  Bucky’s mouth made its way to the waistband of Steve’s boxer briefs. Bucky could already see the outline of an erection beginning to form.  He was flattered… Steve Rogers was aroused and it was because of him.

            Bucky gently peeled of the last piece of clothing off of Steve.  Bucky made his way back over to Steve’s lips. He kissed him sweetly and Steve’s arms reached upwards and snuck around his back so he was grasping onto his shoulders. Steve deepened the kiss and Bucky was practically soaring.  Steve was choosing him, not as a friend or a familial relationship. He could hardly believe this was happening.

            Steve broke the kiss and tried to reach over to Bucky’s boxers.  He was trying to get them off, but the angle just was not working.  Bucky just kicked them off absentmindedly. Before he could back to kissing Steve, the other man sat up slightly.

            “I’ve got stuff in the bedside table,” Steve said, not meeting his eye.  Bucky had to resist the urge to laugh. They were both buck naked and Steve was too nervous to say the words “condoms” or “lube.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Okay.” He went over to the table and pulled out the condoms and lubricant.  Bucky was about to go back over to Steve when he paused. “Are you sure about this?  There’s no going back after we do this.”

            Steve reached out and took Bucky’s hand in his own.  He kissed Bucky’s knuckles sweetly. “I’m sure. Are you?”

            Bucky had never been more sure of anything in his life.  Of course he wanted to spend the night with Steve. Steve, who he’d been desperately in love with for the better part of a year, was honestly asking if he was sure.  The only thing he wasn’t sure about were the consequences, but his better judgement had gone out the window the moment he kissed Steve back.

            “Yeah, I’m sure,” Bucky kissed Steve sweetly before he moved in between his legs.  He coated his fingers generously with the lube. He slowly slid one finger into Steve.  He was watching Steve’s face closely as he was gently working the finger in and out of him.  After a few minutes, he added a second finger.

            Steve let out a low hiss and Bucky halted his movements.  “You okay, Steve?”

            Steve gave a shaky laugh.  “Yeah. It’s just… it’s been a while.  I’m okay.”

            Bucky nodded and gave a peck to Steve’s inner thigh.  “Promise you’ll let me know if you need me to stop.”

            “Promise,” Steve said, smiling at him.

            Bucky continued working his fingers in and out of Steve.  He made sure he took more time than he did with just the first one.  

            After he felt confident that Steve was prepared, he unwrapped the condom. He slid it on and poured some of the lube in his hand.  He proceeded to apply it to his cock generously. He lined himself up and slowly entered Steve. He couldn’t keep a moan from escaping his lips as Steve’s tightness engulfed him.

            Steve let out a gasp, looking up at the ceiling.

            “You still okay?” Bucky asked as he stopped moving.

            Steve nodded, still looking up.  “Give me a second?”

            Bucky nodded back and leaned down to kiss Steve’s torso affectionately.  

            After a few moments, Steve met Bucky’s eyes and smiled.  “I’m okay. You can move.”

            Bucky continued until he bottomed out.  Steve let out a whine, but he didn’t ask him to stop.  Bucky did pause to let Steve adjust for a few moments before he slowly began to move his hips.  It did take a few awkward motions before they were able to get into a rhythm. Steve wasn’t the only one who hadn’t done this in a while.

            Steve gasped.  “ _Oh my god,_ ” he said in a hushed whisper as he arched his back upwards trying to get closer to Bucky.

            Bucky captured Steve’s lips with his own.  One of Steve’s arm reached up and was clutching onto his back, while the other was draped around Bucky’s neck.  Bucky couldn’t register anything other than Steve. He was all Bucky could see, hear, and smell.

            Bucky wasn’t sure how much time had passed before knew that he was getting close to finishing.  Steve must have noticed that Bucky’s motions were becoming more erratic and less rhythmic.

            “Are you close?” Steve asked breathlessly.

            Bucky nodded.  “Don’t worry, I’m gonna take care of you.”

            Steve let out a small laugh.  “I wasn’t worried.”

            Bucky kissed Steve’s neck as his movements became less and less coordinated.  After a few moments, he felt bliss fall over him as he climaxed. He kissed Steve lazily as he took a moment to recover.

            He slowly pulled out of Steve and leaned down.  He took Steve’s cock into his mouth, sucking gently.  It didn’t take too long before Steve’s moans became more desperate.  Bucky pulled off. Steve was desperate and wanton on the bed. The beads of sweat rolling off his forehead only enhanced the already incredible sight he was witnessing.  Bucky took Steve’s cock in his hand and began stroking it. His eyes never left Steve’s face. Steve was practically thrusting up into his hand, his face full of desperation, and Bucky was the one to blame.  After a few moments, relief flooded Steve’s face and Bucky felt Steve release in his hand.

            Bucky moved up on the bed so that he was laying next to Steve.  Steve rolled on his side so that they were looking into each other’s eyes.  

            “That was… wow,” Steve said with a shy smile.

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah, wow.”

 

 


	17. Chapter 16

 

            The next morning, Bucky was just staring at Steve while he slept.  He couldn’t believe he was actually lying next to Steve. He watched as the sun glistened through the window.  Steve looked almost angelic in this light. Bucky never wanted this moment to end. The second they left that bedroom, Bucky had a choice to make.  He’d either have to recuse himself from this assignment or lie to his superiors.

            Bucky was snapped out of his thoughts by Jamie’s cries coming through the baby monitor.  “Pa! Pa want out!”

            Steve groaned.  He squinted his eyes tightly before they cracked open.  He looked over at Bucky and gave him a sweet smile. “Morning.”

            “Good morning, Steve,” Bucky said softly.

            Steve opened his mouth to respond when Jamie started screaming.  “PA! PA!”

            “Have you considered a toddler bed?” Bucky asked with a laugh.  “He’s pretty big for a crib. He’s two.”

            Steve yawned as he sat up.  He stretched and gave a chuckle.  “I mean Harrison was in the crib until he was three.  That said, it might be easier for potty training purposes.”  Steve got out of the bed and walked over to his dresser.

            “Steve,” Bucky said as Steve was throwing on some sweatpants.  “I think we have to talk about how we want to proceed here.”

            Steve froze.  He had one leg in the pants the other was bent in midair.  “What do you mean? I thought… this wasn’t some one-night thing for me, Buck.”

            “No, no,” Bucky said waving fervently. “I didn’t mean… I meant what are we going to tell everyone?  This might be confusing… for the kids. I also… I’m not… I don’t know if you want us to disclose this.”

            Relief washed over Steve’s face as he finished putting his pants on.  Jamie’s screams were still audible in the background. “Oh. I… I didn’t think about that.”  He tossed a shirt on and made his way over to the bed. He kissed Bucky gently. “Listen, I have to go get Jamie and then we have to go over school supply lists today, but… I promise tonight we’ll talk.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Sounds like a plan.”

            Steve grinned as he made his way to the door.  “I’ll see you later.”

            Bucky smiled back as he watched Steve walk out the door.  He got out of the bed and got dressed. He tried his best not to think about the many possible consequences of the previous night.  This went against almost everything Bucky believed in. He was a professional, he never got involved with his charges. Still, he had ample opportunity to stop things last night and hadn’t.

            Bucky went down to the guest bathroom and to clean himself up.  He had to try and figure out how to navigate this whole situation.  He let the hot water wash over him. Not that it mattered--the water couldn’t wash away what he had done the night before.  He’d put them in a position that he was trying to avoid. He was beyond compromised. There was no hope for him looking at any of this objectively anymore.  

            Bucky got out of the shower and went to go do his morning perimeter checks.  Steve was in the kitchen giving Jamie some cereal for breakfast. Bucky smiled tightly at them as he made sure that the window was still secure.  He could feel Steve’s eyes on him. Bucky had to use all his willpower to focus on his job. He couldn’t think about what had happened between him and Steve.  Not now.

            Bucky left the room to and made sure that the rest of the home was secured.  Today he just had to focus on doing his job. Surveillance and protection. That was it for today.  Once he and Steve talked everything over, he could worry about the rest.

            The day passed strangely.  Bucky just could not focus on Steve and the kids.  As hard as he tried to focus on his job, all he could think about was the possible repercussions of what they had done the night before.  Pierce would likely reassign him immediately. Bucky was not prepared to allow that to happen.

            He was walking over to the staircase when he tripped over Maria’s purse that she had left right at the foot of the steps.  Bucky groaned as he picked up. He might as well just put it in her bedroom.

            Bucky trotted up to the second floor.  He knocked on the door and entered. Maria was sitting at her vanity table, brushing her hair.  “Hey, kiddo. You left this downstairs.”

            She smiled at him.  “Thanks, Bucky.”

            Bucky went to walk out of the room when something caught his eye.  Maria was putting on this necklace. Bucky had seen it once before, but hadn’t thought much of it.  She had it with them at Riley and Sam’s house… when they had evacuated during the home invasion. Bucky had definitely not included it in his emergency bags.

            He thought back to that night.  When he found Maria, she had been clutching onto something.  Bucky didn’t think much of it at the time, but there it was. What was so important about that necklace?

            “Hey, quick question.”  Bucky turned back to Maria.

            “What’s up?” She asked with a smile.

            “That necklace…”

            “Yeah?” Maria looked at him quizzically.  “My Dad gave it me.”

            Bucky nodded.  “It’s pretty important to you, right?”

            She looked down sadly.  “Yeah, it was the last birthday present that my Dad ever gave me.  We barely even did anything for birthdays this year.”

            “Yeah… your birthday just passed, right?  End of August?” Bucky asked.

            “Yeah,” Maria said.  “Why?”

            “So your Dad… he gave that to you… right before he died,” Bucky said, more to himself than to Maria.

            She frowned and gave a quick nod. “Yeah, he died a little more than a week later.”

            “Maria,” Bucky said very quietly.  “Would you mind if I looked at it?”

            Her hand instinctively went right to the star-shaped charm on the necklace.  “Why?”

            “I just… Maria… I’m asking you to trust me.  I promise you, I will make sure that you get this back.  I just need to look at it. It might be nothing, but I want to make sure that it’s _not_ something.  I know I’m not making a lot of sense, but you know I’d never let anything bad happen to it.  Especially now that I know how important it is to you.” Bucky stuck his hand out.

            She bit her lip nervously.  She looked down at the charm in her hand and back to Bucky.  It was clear that she was contemplating. “You promise you’ll give it back?  They’re not gonna take it like all of Daddy’s knick knacks?”

            Bucky nodded.  “Maria, I promise you that I will _personally_ make sure that you get this necklace back.”

            She nodded to herself as she unclasped the necklace.  She held onto it for a moment before she placed it in Bucky’s palm.

            “Thank you,” Bucky said honestly.  “I promise you’ll get it back--hopefully sooner rather than later.”

            She gave him a sad smile, but didn’t say anything.  Bucky took that as his cue to leave. It was entirely possible that he was making something out of nothing, but this necklace was the last thing that Stark had brought into the home before his death.  It was worth looking into.

            Later that night, Bucky met Steve back in the master bedroom.  He wasn’t really sure what he wanted to say, he was hoping that Steve would have more insight to share.  Bucky was nervously pacing back and forth, waiting for Steve.

            Steve entered.  “Hey, sorry. Harrison wanted an extra bedtime story.”

            Bucky smiled.  He was relieved to see him. “No worries.”

            “So… let’s talk?” Steve gave him a nervous smile.  “I haven’t really had to talk about stuff like this in the better part of twenty years, so… bear with me?”

            “I’ve… it’s been pretty long for me too,” Bucky said honestly.  He’d had a few relationships here and there, but ultimately he was married to his job.  He hadn’t done something like this in ages.

            Steve seemed to ease up at that.  He gave a little nod. “So… I don’t… I don’t think we should tell the kids yet.  I… we… we haven’t exactly gone about this the traditional way, and I don’t want to confuse them.”

            Bucky nodded.  He really didn’t mind one way or the other when it came to the kids.  If things became serious, they’d tell them then. He was much more concerned about telling his superiors.  “I think we probably have to disclose our… relationship to the higher ups. If it comes out later on… we’ll be worse off.”

            Steve frowned.  “What if they reassign you?”

            Bucky sighed.  “That is definitely a possibility.  I don’t like the idea, but I don’t see any other option--”

            “Why can’t we just keep it to ourselves?” Steve asked, his voice had a hint of desperation in it.  “It’s not affecting your work--”

            “But it _is_ , Steve,” Bucky said honestly.  “It’s only been one day and I’ve had trouble focusing.  All I can think about is _you_.”

            Steve gave him a sad smile.  “You said you didn’t think anyone would take this as seriously as you.”

            Bucky nodded.  “Yeah. I did. I _still_ think that.  It doesn’t mean that I haven’t compromised myself here.  Just because I take it seriously, doesn’t mean that I’m the best man for the job right now.”

            “If they reassign you, is there a chance I won’t even hear from you?” Steve asked as he crossed his arms.  “I’m not going to go through all this if I never get to see or hear from you again. I want _this_.”  He motioned between the two of them.  “Rules be damned.”

            Bucky opened his mouth to speak when the power cut off.  “ _Shit_.”

            “Oh my god,” Steve said, panic filling his voice. He went to run out the door when Bucky stopped him.  

            “Steve.  Get in the closet,” he hissed.  He looked at his smart watch. “The kids are checking into their safe spaces now.  He felt himself breathe a little easy. Even Jamie was in a safe spot with Howie.

            “Bucky, I can’t--”

            “Steve, look.”  Bucky showed him his watch.  “Nothing can get into those closets now that we’re in lock down mode.  They all checked it. They’re safe for now. Please… get in the closet so I can do my job.”

            Steve took a deep breath and put his hands on his hips.  “Bucky… I can’t do that.”

            “Why the hell not?” Bucky snapped.  “My motion detectors are telling me there are other people in the house, Steve.  I need you to get in the closet so I can do my job.”

            “Because… I know where JARVIS is,” Steve said, not looking him in the eye.

            Bucky’s face fell.  He wasn’t sure why he was so surprised.  “Is it in the house?”

            Steve nodded.  He was still facing the other direction.  “They can’t get it, though. They need a key.  It’s safe. It’s in one of the closets, it’s with--”

            Bucky took Maria’s necklace out of his pocket and dangled it in front of Steve’s face.  “Is it supposed to be with your eleven-year-old?”

            Steve blinked.  “How--”

            “I was following up on a hunch,” Bucky deadpanned.  He was livid, but he didn’t have time to deal with Steve right now.  “Just tell me where it is, so I can keep these guys from getting it.”

            “I can’t--”

            “Are you kidding me right now?” Bucky spat.  “This isn’t a request, Steve.”

            Steve shook his head.  “No--I mean… I have to show you.  It’s not that simple.”

            Bucky sighed.  “Fine. You have to stay close to me, though, Steve.”

            “Yeah--yeah, okay,” Steve agreed.

            Bucky motioned to the door and followed Steve keeping close.  They encountered a hostile that was raiding through one of the guest rooms on the top floor.  It was easy for Bucky to subdue him. One difference from the first time around was that Bucky was now making sure that he had tranquilizers on him.  He was not going to have nearly enough handcuffs to keep all their enemies immobilized. Tranquilizers were the next best option.

            They made their way to the second floor.  Bucky would have been content to leave it without looking through anything.  He knew there was no way they’d be able to get to the kids, but Steve immediately went looking through the bedrooms to make sure there wasn’t a single intruder there.  There wasn’t.

            When they got to the first floor, Bucky froze.  They were surrounded by hostiles. Steve should have just stayed upstairs where it was safe.  The hostiles had their weapons on them, and Bucky was looking around trying to get a count of just how many of them there actually were.  Before he could even think about a strategy, Steve snapped into action.

            Steve had managed to disarm the enemy closest to him and was currently using him as a human shield as he proceeded to subdue the others.  Bucky joined him in combating the other hostiles closest to him. He wasn’t sure how long or how long it took, but by the end of it, he and Steve were the only ones standing.  

            “You okay?” Bucky asked.

            Steve was breathing heavily.  He made eye contact with Bucky and nodded.  “You?”

            “I’m fine.”

            Steve sighed as he continued leading Bucky.  They made their way down the hall of empty studies and offices.  They entered Steve’s office. He was right to look there.

            “It’s been in here the entire time?” Bucky asked as he put his hands on his hips.

            Steve gave him a look.  “Sort of.” He went over to the uniform just like Bucky had and pulled it off the wall.  Steve put his hand against the tile that was just slightly out of place and a whole section of the wall opened up.  Stark really hadn’t been messing around.

            “I tried that,” Bucky said dumbly.

            “Your handprint wasn’t on file,” Steve said matter-of-factly.

            They were about to go walk through the opening when Bucky heard the sound of a gun cock.  He turned abruptly to see two agents standing there. Bucky let out a sigh of relief. These were his people.

            “It’s okay,” Bucky said to Steve.  “They’re with us.”

            Steve looked at him oddly.  “Bucky, we didn’t call this in.”

            The two agents took their helmets off.  Rumlow and Rollins, two of the best strike operatives, were there.  “It’s all right, Captain. We’re here to help.”

            “Bucky,” Steve said nervously.  “How did they know we needed help?”

            Bucky paused.  He hadn’t called it in. Steve was right.  Bucky had been so relieved to see backup that he hadn’t thought about how they would have known he needed any in the first place.  “How did you know?”

            “Come on, Sarge,” Rumlow said incredulously.  “Are you serious right now?”

            “Answer the question,” Bucky said sternly.  “I won’t ask again.”

            Rumlow sighed as he drew his gun, Rollins following suit.  They both had their weapons pointed directly at Steve. “You might be able to disarm one of us, Sarge, but while you’re busy with that, you won’t be able to keep Stark’s little trophy wife safe.”

            Bucky stared at him.  “You’re Hydra? You’ve been working for them this entire time--”

            Rumlow laughed darkly.  “How else would we have found out where Stark was?  You kept those details under lock and key.”

            He then turned his attention to Steve.  “Show us where the tech is, Rogers.”

            Steve was frozen in place.  He didn’t budge. “No.”

            “I’m not asking,” Rumlow said.  “Your kids already lost one parent.  I’d hate for them to lose another.”

            “Don’t--” Steve croaked.  “Don’t you _dare_ talk about my kids.”

            “Steve,” Bucky said softly.  “It’s okay. Just show them what they want.  This isn’t worth your life.”

            Steve’s face fell.  He slowly retreated into the opening of the wall.  “It’s not big enough for more than one person. I’ll--”

            Rollins made his way over to Steve and pulled him roughly out of the annex.  He went in and grabbed an ornate box that was in there. He tried to open it with no luck.  Bucky assumed that the necklace was the key, but he had no idea how it would work. It wasn’t like there was a star-shaped hole for it to fit.

            “How do we open it?” Rumlow spat at Steve.

            Steve let out a small theatrical cry.  “I don’t know. I swear--”

            “Bullshit!” Rumlow snapped.  “Open the box, Rogers.”

            “Steve,” Bucky said softly.  “It’s not worth your life. He’s right.  Your kids need you.”

            “Bucky has the key,” Steve said defeatedly.

            Bucky took a deep breath.  “It’s in my pocket. It’s a necklace.”

            Rumlow roughly stuck his hand in Bucky’s front pocket and pulled the necklace out.  He tossed it carelessly to Rollins.

            “How does this work?”

            “It’s a sensor,” Steve said quietly.  “You need to bring it close to the opening and--” The box cracked open.

            Bucky didn’t see it coming, but Steve bolted forward and tackled Rollins to the ground.  Bucky barely had time to react. He was running over to Steve, forgetting about Rumlow, and just as Steve was clutching the USB drive in his hand, Bucky saw Rollins raise his weapon.  He pushed Steve out of the way and felt a white hot pain in his left arm.

            He stumbled and looked at it.  He’d been shot, by both Rollins and Rumlow.  Steve was in the corner of the room, watching with a horrified look on his face.  “Oh my god, Bucky--”

            Before Bucky could get a word out, he saw Rumlow aim his weapon at Steve and then everything went black.

            Beeps.  He could hear little beeps in his ear.  He opened his eyes and looked around. Where was he?  Where was Steve? He became aware that he was in some sort of a hospital.  He appeared to be alone… except for Barton.

            “Clint?” Bucky said hoarsely.  “What… where--”

            “Hey,” Clint stood up from his chair and walked over.  “Welcome back, Sarge.”

            “Rumlow and Rollins, they’re--”

            “Yeah,” Clint said with a laugh.  “Yeah, Steve might have mentioned it.”

            Bucky let out a sigh of relief.  “Steve’s okay?”

            “Yeah… thanks to you, I hear,” Clint said.

            “How did we get out of there?” Bucky asked.

            Barton laughed.  “Well, turns out you were right to investigate the preschool teacher.  She was MI6 all long.”

            Bucky laughed bitterly.  “Go figure.”

            “The Widow’s here… she’s been working with our guys.  They’re dumping all military intel to determine who’s Hydra and who’s not.  Pierce was involved… the entire time, Sarge.”

            Bucky stared at him.  “You’re kidding?”

            “I wish I was kidding, Sarge,” Barton said grimly.

            Bucky went to sit up.  He had thousands of questions but he stopped.  He couldn’t move his left arm. He went to look over at it when he realized.  “What--”

            “You lost a lot of blood,” Clint said.  “Carter made a makeshift tourniquet until paramedics got there.  They had to amputate. I’m sorry, Sarge.”

            “Are my sisters here?” Bucky asked after a long pause.  “Did anyone tell them?”

            Clint sighed.  “Rebecca’s here.  She’s been staying nearby.  Delia sent flowers; I think she’s overseas at the moment.  Abby’s been calling constantly. They’re all thinking about you.”

            “I don’t want them to worry,” Bucky groaned.

            “I think they’re excused,” Clint said amused.  “We’ve got the best prosthetist in the country working on making your arm.  You’ll get through this.” There was another long pause before Barton continued.  “Steve’s been here every day.”

            “I didn’t think they’d let him anywhere near here,” Bucky said honestly.

            “Well, it was that or he was gonna destroy the flash drive, so...” Clint’s voice trailed off.  “He also disclosed that you two had a sexual history.”

            Bucky sighed.  “Should I be expecting a pink slip?”

            “I wouldn’t think so,” Clint said.  “Technically, you were instrumental in finding JARVIS.  I think they’ll let this slide. That said… with the arm--”

            “I’ll be discharged anyway,” Bucky finished for him.

            Clint smiled tightly and nodded.  “More likely than not.”

            The door opened and his sister Rebecca entered the room.  She wasn’t alone. Steve was with her. She smiled at him.  “James. You gave us all quite a scare.”

            Bucky smiled sadly at her.  He hadn’t seen her in at least five years.  She still looked the same. “How are you doing, Becks?”

            She shook her head at him.  “I’m doing well, James. I’m much more concerned about you.  How are you feeling?”

            “Pretty well, all things considered.” He looked back over to where his arm used to be.  It didn’t feel real. “Thanks for being here.”

            “Abby and Delia are going to come when things settle down,” she said as she moved a strand of hair from Bucky’s face.  “We’ve got you.”

            Steve gave him a nervous smile.  “The kids sent some artwork and get well soon cards. I--”

            “Steve,” Bucky cut him off.  “I’m glad that you’re all right--that everyone is all right.  I just… you--”

            “I know,” Steve said guilitly.  “I know that this is not the time or the place for us to process everything.  I lied and I misled and--”

            “And you weren’t the only one,” Bucky said.  “We both have to clear the air about some things.  Now may not be the time or place, but… I do want us to talk about it another time.”

            Steve smiled gratefully.  “Understood.”

 

 


	18. Epilogue: Two Years Later

            Bucky was examining his prosthetic arm.  It really was remarkable how much he was capable of doing with it.  He was currently waiting in the car. They were going to be late.

            The car door cracked open and Sarah took a seat in the back.  “Sorry, Bucky. Jamie’s fighting with Papa about the suit.”

            Bucky threw his head back and groaned.  “We’re going to be late.”

            She shrugged as Maria and the twins filed into the SUV.  Bucky got out of the car and walked into the house. Steve was standing there, his hands on his hips, while Jamie--now four years old--was laying on the ground, kicking and screaming.

            Howie and Harrison gave him a look as they ran out the door to head into the car.

            “Jamie, if you’re gonna act like that, you and I will just stay home.”  He crossed his arms. “Bucky can take all your brothers and sisters to the wedding and you can be the one to tell Aunt Natasha and Uncle Clint why we missed out on their special day.”

            The crying abruptly stopped.  “But… I want--I wanna go!”

            “Then you will put your jacket on and get in the car,” Steve said through gritted teeth.

            Jamie pouted as he stood up.  He picked his jacket up from the couch and walked to the front door sniffling.  

            Steve watched him closely as he grabbed his own jacket.  He saw Bucky standing there and kissed him sweetly. “Sorry.  Someone was having a mental breakdown.”

            “I can see that,” Bucky said as he took Steve’s hand in his flesh one.  “I can’t believe they’re actually getting married.”

            Steve tensed at that.  “I just can’t believe that it’s happening before _we_ get married.”

            Bucky gave him a look.  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

            “Nothing,” Steve lied.  “Come on, we’re gonna be late.”  He went to walk out the door, but Bucky held him there.

            “You’re the one who said you wanted a long engagement,” Bucky said.

            “I know,” Steve said unconvincingly.  “I just… we haven’t even talked about it since we got engaged a year and a half ago.  It doesn’t matter, though… we’re gonna be late--”

            “Steve,” Bucky said seriously.  “I’ve never done this before. Whatever you want… you’ve got it.  You want us to get married tomorrow, we’ll do it. All that matters to me is that I get to spend the rest of my life with you.”

            Steve smiled as he kissed Bucky deeply.  “Okay. We’ll talk about this more later.  Right now…”

            “Yeah,” Bucky smiled as he followed Steve out the door to their house.  “We’ve got all the time in the world to talk about this… but we’re late.”

            The wedding was beautiful.  It was a small ceremony, as neither of them had a very large family or a lot of friends.  It was quiet and intimate. It was everything that Clint and Natasha wanted. Bucky still found it funny that both he and Clint had managed to find romance upon being assigned to this case.

            “Congratulations,” Bucky said to Clint as Steve was trying to wrangle up the kids and get them in the car.  “You seem really happy. You both do. Who would have thought… you and the Black Widow.”

            Clint laughed as he looked over to Natasha, who was currently dancing with Harrison.  “She really is something else.”

            “I’m glad you’re happy,” he said honestly.  “You deserve it.”

            “You too, Barnes,” Clint said as they glanced over at Steve, who was currently putting Jamie in time-out.

            Bucky shook his head.  “Thank god for JARVIS.”

            “Never thought we’d be saying that,” Clint said.

            Bucky nodded.  It was true. He never would have imagined that the mission that caused him the most trouble would have been the one that was the most rewarding.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! There was incredible art created by gassadaarts on tumblr [here](http://gassadaarts.tumblr.com/post/183193649832/the-kids-are-alright-and-persuasion-painted-for) and I have to thank my incredible beta [ Anne](http://melsmalone.tumblr.com/)


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